Lee Marsh: Abuse Recovery page

Links

Guestbook






 



   Virginia Woolf: Incest and its Effect on her Life
 
Virginia Woolf experienced many of the initial and long-term effects of child sexual abuse which have been identified by recent researchers. Several factors contributed to her chronic depression and eventual suicide. The effects of child sexual abuse can be seen throughout the life of Virginia Woolf and eventually contributed to her death by suicide.
Virginia Woolf, best known as a writer and literary critic during the first half of the twentieth century, is the subject of a recent book on incest. In the past, biographers have concentrated almost solely on her work, letters and diaries. Louise DeSalvo, however, in her book Virginia Woolf: The Impact of Childhood Sexual Abuse on her Life and Work (1989), focuses on the effect that incest had on her life. In recent years, much attention has been given to the effects of child sexual abuse on its victims. For example, research has clearly demonstrated a link between child sexual abuse and clinical depression as an adult (Finkelhor, 1986; Sgroi, 1982). Virginia Woolf experienced many of the long-term effects of sexual abuse that these researchers have identified (DeSalvo, 1989).

By examining the social environment and the family structure that Virginia lived in, it is possible to see that her eventual suicide may have been linked to her experience as a victim of family violence. Factors that contributed to her victimization included: (1) the Victorian beliefs regarding childhood, education and discipline, (2) the parents' negligence, (3) Laura's treatment by the family, and (4) the sexual abuse by her half-brothers. These factors and Virginia's confusion about Freud's Oepidal theory (which states that children fantasize their sexual abuse) contributed to Virginia's decision to commit suicide.

Throughout the eighteenth, nineteenth, and early twentieth centuries, the civilized world believed in the purity of the child (Rush, p.57). However, by 1888, the medical profession was alarmed by the increased number of incidents of child sexual abuse. Krafft-Ebing, a physician and sexologist of the time, stated that there was an increase in sexual crimes, especially "in the case with immoral acts with children under fourteen" (Rush, p.518).

Despite the belief that children were innocent and pure, society also believed that children were bad and willful. Professionals stated that it was the responsibility of parents to control children to the point of breaking their spirit if necessary. In 1858, Dr. Scheber advised parents that an "outburst of temper, a whim, the first appearance of willfullness" should be treated "by stern words, threatening gestures...by appropriately mild corporal admonitions" so that the parent will become the "master of the child forever" (Miller, p.5). In the matter of education, Kruger went even further. He believed that a child's inability to learn was a deliberate attempt to undermine the parents' authority. Kruger's advice to parents was to "whip him well till he cries" (Miller, pp.14,15).

The inability of children to control their natural exuberance was seen by some as a mental illness. Parents were admonished to limit the child's environment to prevent "all influences that might stimulate feelings" (Landman, no p.). These beliefs strongly influenced parental discipline in Virginia's family.

The family structure that Virginia was raised in also had a profound effect on her character. Virginia's father, Leslie Stephen, came from a family of writers and clergymen. Leslie's father and grandfather were advocates against slavery and wrote extensively about injustice. His mother's family founded the Clapham sect, a puritanical group who "saw no harm in innocent pleasures" (Bell, p.6). In 1859, Leslie was ordained as a minister at Oxford University. Later that year, after his father's death, he became disillusioned with the church and left the ministry (Bell, p.7). He married Harriet Marian Thackeray and together they had one child, Laura. Harriet died in childbirth when Laura was five years old (Bell, pp. 10-12).

Virginia's mother, Julia Pattle, came from a slightly higher middle-class family than Leslie. Julia's mother, Maria, married Dr. John Johnson and together they had three daughters, who were known for their beauty. Julia married Herbert Duckworth and had three children: Gerald, Stella, and George. George was born after his father's death in 1870 (Bell, p.18).

Leslie Stephen and Julia Pattle Duckworth were married in 1878. Their first two children, Vanessa and Thoby, were born and then they decided to limit their family. After her father's death Virginia learned that Leslie and Julia had not planned to have more children and "did what they could to prevent me" (Woolf, Diary 5, 22 September 1940). After Virginia they had one more child, Adrian. The household then consisted of Leslie and Julia and seven children (De Salvo, p.1).

Virginia did not have the carefree childhood that was frequently associated with the Victorian era. She describes her family as a lonely "caravan, absolutely private silent, unknown" (Woolf, Diary 5, 1 November 1937). In A Sketch from the Past she stated that her house was "like a cage" (p. 184), that she was "as an animal trapped within it" (p. 93) and "a prey to any `wild beast' who chose to harm her" (p. 79).

Leslie, was, for the most part, unaware of the atmosphere at home. At the time of Virginia's birth, he and Julia were deeply involved in Laura's educational problems. He had accepted a post as editor of the Dictionnary of National Bibliography and stated that he was so "overwhelmed by his work that he was `paying very little attention to what is passing around me'" (Annan, p.86). By 1888 he suffered the first of four work-related breakdowns (Annan, p.86; De Salvo p.136). Leslie was also severely depressed and suicidal. In a letter to Julia in 1891, he praised the Duke of Bedford for "having the courage to shoot himself" (De Salvo, p.135).

In A Sketch from the Past Virginia stated that due to "male privilege" Leslie was in an "extraordinarily privileged position" ( ? ) Julia conveyed to her children that their father "was licensed" and that he was "not bound by the laws of ordinary people" (p. 111). The message to the Stephen children was that their father was special and not to be burdened with their problems. He was either too busy or too ill.

Virginia believed her mother was chronically overworked. Julia's first priority was to her husband, especially during his illnesses. Julia supported Leslie's privileged position in the family and seemed to prefer the boys over the girls. Virginia's older half-sister, Stella, was used as free labor to help care for the large family while Julia was active in her volunteer work (De Salvo, p.125). In reality Julia spent very little time with her children except during their lessons.

Leslie and Julia were gravely concerned about Leslie's daughter, Laura. Harriet, Laura's mother, believed that Laura was a "backward" child (Bell, p.12). When Virginia was born, Laura was not reading well enough to satisfy Leslie and Julia. On February 4, 1882, Leslie wrote that Laura's refusal to read was "intensely provoking" (De Salvo, p.21). Leslie considered Laura's lack of ability to read to be a refusal and personal challenge to him as head of the family.

In keeping with Victorian values, Laura's parents dealt with the child's willfulness promptly and severely. Julia punished Laura by isolating her from the rest of the family, but "Leslie didn't believe this was severe enough" (De Salvo, pp. 21-22). Leslie also believed that Laura should never whine nor cry in response to any punishment he meted out to her. Finally, Laura was confined to a distant part of the house, where she continued to live until Virginia was seven or eight. Laura was eventually sent to a nursing home for the mentally ill, where she remained until her death (De Salvo, pp.22-23).

At a young and impressionable age Virginia witnessed the treatment that Laura received for not meeting her parents' expectations. Virginia learned that complaining about punishment only brought worse treatment. It is likely that Virginia feared that she too would be isolated from the family if she failed to meet her parents' expectations.

Bell states that Virginia was "an unusual child; it took her a very long time to learn to talk properly; she did not do so until she was three years old" (p.22). According to her father, Virginia knew how to "create an atmosphere" and from an early age she was thought to be "incalculable, eccentric, and prone to accidents" (Bell, p.24). These behaviors were not acceptable in a Victorian household. Most likely, Virginia was severely punished for what was considered to be her exuberance and willfulness.

Both parents were impatient and easily angered when they attempted to teach the children their lessons. By the age of seven Virginia was learning Latin, history and French from her mother and mathematics from her father (Bell, p.26). Later in her life Virginia told her doctor, Octavia Wilberforce, that her father "made too great emotional demands on her" (Moore, p.16), especially after her mother died. Virginia could not understand that her chronic life-long depression was directly linked to Victorian child-rearing practices and the abuse in her family (De Salvo, p.124).

In the final decade of her life Virginia began to write about her sexual abuse by her half-brothers George and Gerald. The first incident occurred when Virginia was recuperating from a severe case of whooping cough. In her letters she wrote, "I still shiver with shame at the memory of my half-brother, standing me on a ledge, aged about 6, and so exploring my private parts. Why should I have felt shame then?" (Woolf, Letters 6:3678). Virginia referred to this incident as "breaking the hymen--a painful operation" (Woolf, Letters 6:3678). It was natural for her to feel the shame of being robbed of her virginity in this manner. Virginia knew that she was the one who would be blamed for her failure to remain pure and chaste. She related how this experience affected her by writing that "I was always sexually cowardly" (Woolf, Letters 4:2194).

After her recuperation from whooping cough, Virginia's father wrote that "At the age of six she had become a rather different kind of person, more thoughtful and more speculative" (Bell, p.25). Leslie attributed the change in Virginia's personality to her illness. Current researchers, however, have found that a dramatic change in a child's personality is a good indicator that the child may have been sexually abused (Finkelhor, p.147; Sgroi, p.40). Many children become withdrawn and depressed as a result of the sexual abuse. They may become dependent and clinging or anxious and fearful. Most child victims appear to be pseudo-mature. Fear of men, guilt, shame, isolation from peers, precocious sexual knowledge and depression are all initial effects of child sexual abuse (Finkelhor, pp.186-187; Sgroi, pp.40,41,71). It seems that as a child Virginia experienced all of these symptoms after her brother abused her.

Virginia tried to tell her parents what was happening to her. She used her stories, written in the family newspaper, to tell them in an indirect way (De Salvo, p.120). No one listened. After Julia's death, when George was sexually abusing both Virginia and her sister Vanessa, Virginia wrote, "A finger was laid on our lips." (Woolf, Sketch p.93). As a child, she knew she had to be discreet about disclosing the sexual abuse which continued for fourteen years (De Salvo, p.101). As an adult, however, Virginia became very vocal about her experiences in her writings and to her friends (De Salvo, pp.120-125).

Later in her life, she attempted to make some sense of her chronic depression. She began recalling her past, the neglect of her parents, Laura's abuse and her own sexual abuse. In an attempt to understand herself better, Virginia began to read Freud (Woolf, Diary 5, 20 June 1940). Freud's theory about childhood sexual fantasies only confused her. To accept Freud's theory she would have to ignore her own memories. Accepting Freud's theory would mean that she was going mad--that her depression was from her madness, and that her memories of sexual abuse were nothing more than childish fantasies. "Freud is upsetting; reducing one to whirlpool," she wrote (Woolf, Diary 5, 9 December, 1939). Virginia continued to read Freud throughout 1940 and in January 1941 she wrote a letter describing the pain she experienced when Gerald broke her hymen (Woolf, Letters, 12 January, 1941).

On the 15th of January she wrote that she was "ashamed of her own words" and by the end of the month she was fighting a severe depression (De Salvo, p.132). In March she stopped writing her autobiography. In a suicide note to her sister, Vanessa, Virginia wrote that she thought she was going mad. "She had no fight left" (De Salvo, p.133). "I know I shan't get over it now" (Woolf, Letters 6:3702). One week later Virginia Woolf committed suicide.

Towards the end of her life Virginia tried to understand how her past contributed to her life-long depression. She began her memoirs and in doing so recalled many of the painful incidents in her childhood. She wrote about Laura's abuse and isolation from the family and about the punishments that the children received for not learning their lessons to the satisfaction of their parents. Virginia witnessed her father's breakdowns and depressions. She relived memories of her traumatic sexual abuse by her half-brothers and she felt her shame again. Virginia suffered from many of the initial and long-term effects of child sexual abuse. She thought she was going mad. She hoped Freud would make some sense of her world, but Freud only convinced her that her memories were a fantasy and that she was indeed mad. Virginia felt no hope. She could not face another relapse and ended her life.


References
  • Annan, Noel. Leslie Stephen. Cambridge, MA:Harvard University Press, 1952. In De Salvo, L. Virginia Woolf. Boston, MA:Beacon Press, 1989.
  • Bell, Quentin. Virginia Woolf:A Biography. New York:Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1985.
  • De Salvo, Louise. Virginia Woolf:The Impact of Childhood Sexual Abuse on her Life and Work. Boston:Beacon Press, 1989.
  • Finkelhor, David. Sourcebook on Child Sexual Abuse. Beverly Hills:Sage Publications, 1986.
  • Krafft-Ebing, Richard von. Psychopathia Sexualis. New  York:Putnam's, 1965. In Rush, Florence. Best Kept Secret:Sexual Abuse of Children. New York:McGraw-Hill, 1980.
  • Kruger, J.G. Gedanken von der Erziehung der Kinder (Some thoughts on the education of children), 1752. In De Salvo, L. Virginia Woolf. Boston:Beacon Press, 1989.
  • Landman. Uber den Kinderfehler der Heftigkeit. (On the character fault of exuberance in children). 1896. In  Miller, Alice. For Your Own Good. Trans. Hildegarde and Hunter Hannum. New York: Farrar Straus Giroux, 1983.
  • Miller, Alice. For Your own Good. Translation Hildegarde and Hunter Hannum. New York:Farrar Straus Giroux, 1983.
  • Moore, Madeline. The Short Season between Two Silences:The Political and Mystical in the Works of Virginia Woolf. n.p.:Allen and Unwin, 1984. In De Salvo. L. Virginia Woolf. Boston:Beacon Press, 1989.
  • Rush, Florence. Best Kept Secret:Sexual Abuse of Children. New York:McGraw-Hill, 1980.
  • Schreber. n.t; In Schatzuan, Morton. Soul Murder:Persecution in the Family. New York:n. pub. 1973.
  • Sgroi. Suzanne. Handbook of Clinical Intervention in Child Sexual Abuse. Lexington MA:Lexington Books, 1982.
  • Woolf, Virginia. Diary of Virginia Woolf. Volume 5, 1936-1941.Ed, Anne Olivier Bell, assisted by Andrew McNeillie. New York:Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1984.
  • _____Letters of Virginia Woolf. Volume 4. 1929-1931. Ed. Nigel Nicolson and Joanne Trautman. New York:Harcourt Brace  Jovanovich, 1978. (Originally published in England as A  Reflection of the Other Person).
  • _____Letters of Virginia Woolf. Volume 6, 1936-1941. Ed. Nigel Nicolson and Joanne Trautman. New York:Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1980. (Originally published in England as Leave the Letters Till We're Dead).
  • _____Moments of Being: Unpublished Autobiographical Writings. 2nd ed. Ed., Introduction, and Notes by Jeanne Schulkind. New York:Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1985.
  • _____Sketch of the Past. In Woolf, Virginia. Moments of  Being: Unpublished Autobiographical Writings. 2nd ed. Ed.,  Introduction, and Notes by Jeanne Schulkind. New York: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1985.




Copyright 1989; 2004: Lee Marsh

The material on this site shall not be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without permission of the publisher. 

If you are interested in obtaining a copy of this page please .