Ok, what's up with all this Britney Spears stuff?
     We've all heard of her...the "Pop Princess" from Kentwood, Louisiana.  What I want to know is...what's the big deal?  When she started out, I had no problem with her.  I guess I wasn't paying enough attention.  But she (and her record label) have since made sure we paid attention.  Not because she's worthy of fame and fortune based on musical talent.  Not because her musical style is any different from any other pop star out there.  No.  Actually, her popularity is derived from the fact that her record label has enough money to push her to impressionable youths, and from the fact that she's very willing to take her clothes off in public, not leaving much to the imagination.
      No, I'm not jealous of her looks, fame, or  money, nor do I want anything to do with that "thing" she's dating.  I just want to clear that up for those Britney fans who always use the (usually badly misspelled) "you're jealous" argument.  I just don't like that she sends such mixed messages to our kids.  I have no problem with a woman (regardless of any physical factor) taking her clothes off in public, as long as the said "public" is composed of consenting adults, and as long as that's what she herself wants to do.  I do have a problem when the woman is under 21 years of age, though, and when she sends the message that "it's all for show," "I'm a good Christian girl," and "I'm keeping my virginity till I'm married;"  such hypocricy is confusing to young people.  She's no role model...she's a liar, a pre-age drinker, and probably a smoker.  She said it herself, she's "not that innocent."
      I also don't like her for the fact that she just simply can't sing!  Ok, that's a matter of taste.  Loads of people think she's the greatest singer out there.  (Most of them are 12 or younger, but that's neither here nor there, I guess.)  Many of us, though, think she's a fake, no-talent, ready-made (just add implants) Madonna wannabe.  But then...Madonna's pretty fake and no-talent, too...   Those lyrics...so predictable.  Either about breaking up, having a crush, wanting to get back together, I'm a bad girl, I'm a good girl, I'm a big girl now, I'm not sure I'm a big girl now, I want a boyfriend, blah, blah, blah!  She doesn't even co-write 1/10 of her songs!  That means she's not a REAL musical artist.  Of course, I wouldn't call whoever writes her songs a great musical talent, either.  Let's see them come out with a song about growing up in a broken home, about war, about anything other than "teeny bopper" issues, and maybe I'll listen!  Sure, love and such is a part of life, but so are problems...and right now in the United States, lots of people are living through Hell after losing loved ones on 9-11-01.  What difference is Britney making?  Well, she's donating $1 from each ticket sold to a relief fund.  I'm guessing her tickets sell for about $30 each...that's not much of a contribution, but then she has to pay someone to pick the cereal pieces out of her Lucky Charms (I read this some time ago in an article).
     Now she's coming out with a tailor-made movie that her record label bought for her.  Just great.  Of course, she's the star.  The straight A student (Britney has yet to graduate from highschool at age 20) who has never done anything wrong.  Maybe Jive Records is trying to clean up her image after she did her orgy video (Slave for You).


     Anyway, enjoy the pics and captions below.  If you're a Britney fan, go to a Britney website.  I really don't want to hear you whine.
    
What a stupid expression!  And doesn't it look like the Pop Princess has grown a little moustache?
Is it just me or does it look like she's having trouble keeping those fat legs together?  And look at those (fake) boobs!  Who chose that ugly outfit for her?
Who took this shot?  Some pedophile, no doubt...after all, she's "Not Yet a Woman"
Is this a smile, or is she trying to scare some kids on Halloween?  Maybe her nose job was giving her problems when this shot was taken?
If only this were me targeting her with my gun...oh relax, I'm just kidding!.
"Do you really have to film me while I take a crap behind this fake rock?"
"I'm so constipated!  Too many Lucky Charms marshmallows lately."
"Finally!!!  Hey, does someone have a match?"
If she breathes too deeply, you'll see her fake nipples!
Here we see the vigin, Britney, trying to prove once and for all that her boobs are 100% real!  (100% real silicone, that is!)
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Ok, for someone who dances for a living, she sure has some major cottage cheese going on around the thigh area.  Of course, the bathing suit doesn't help...she shoulda got the bottoms a couple sizes bigger.  The way she's standing doesn't do much for the image, either.
Ok, someone explain to me what this picture is all about, because I'm totally in the dark as to why she looks so enthralled over such a stupid pair of glasses.
Either she just realized that her hair looks positively awful here, or she just saw a picture of herself without makeup.
No comment.  It speaks for itself.
"Everyone loves me...everyone loves me not...everyone loves me...everyone loves me not..."
"What???  Everyone loves me not, huh?  Someone get me a new flower.  This one's broke!"
Now, I ask you, shouldn't the hottest teen couple in pop music know how to dress themselves better than this?  Justin, really!  Went back to the Brillo head hairdo, I see...didn't iron your shirt, and wore a cheap tank top undershirt underdeath it!  In short, you look like a slob.  And Britney...how much did you spend on that *ahem* outfit?  First, it's butt ugly.  Second, it's too small for you.  Third, that hat really makes you look stupid.  Fourth, the color of the...whatever the hell it is you're wearing...is too pale for you.   You look like you have a friggin sunburn, girl!
"Hey, pull my finger!"
PRRRFFFFFFFFTTTT
"Oops, I farted again!"
If anything here has offended you (i.e., you are a Britney fan or a Justin fan)  click on the pic above, and you will magically be transported to a place more suited to your tastes.
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The Britney Poll
What do you think of Britney Spears?

She's a great singer and a great role model for young girls
She's an ok singer but not a good role model
She's not a good singer, but she's a good role model
She's a terrible singer and a bad role model for kids
She sounds like a donkey with a cold when she sings
She just all-around sucks

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