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Disclaimers: Not mine, none of them mine *sigh*
He lay on the cot looking up at the ceiling. He couldn’t believe what had happened. He couldn’t believe that he was on a backwater planet on charges of – of what exactly? Had they actually said? He couldn’t remember; been too busy fighting and yelling. He smiled slightly, Jeez, for everything he had done on this side of the universe, being in prison for something as trivial as this was just ironic. He knew it must be trivial, even if he didn’t know the charge. He’d caught the last remnants of the conversation when the guards had thrown him into the cell. One weeken they had said, one weeken for the crime he had committed. It couldn’t have come at worst time, but then again, when was there ever a good time lately? He allowed his mind to wander back to the previous day and the events that had led up to the arrest.
“Look, there is nothing we can really do until we find Scorpius. We can’t put your farbot plan into action until then so why don’t we have some frelling fun?” Chiana moaned for the fifth time in less than an arn.
“Chiana is right, we have agreed to the plan, we have agreed to the terms, we have agreed to everything! You should agree to this, it is only fair, it is only right!”
John laughed “Well that’s rich coming from you Buckwheat. Do you even know the meaning of those words?” He turned to Chiana “I know you need some space Pip, we all do. But going down to an unknown planet is just asking for trouble. Trouble we can do without.” Just then, D’Argo appeared then did an about turn, realising what he had just walked into. “Oh, no you don’t D, some help here wouldn’t go amiss.”
“If it would not go a miss then I will leave you to it” Sometimes John wondered if D’Argo deliberately misunderstood him. As he turned to leave Aeryn and Crais walked in making the crew on Moya complete. D’Argo looked from them to John. He sighed, better to stay, just in case. “What do you need my help with?”
John seemed to lose the thread of the conversation as his eyes settled on Aeryn. They hadn’t really spoken since she got back from Talyn. That was almost three weekens ago. He had kept his distance, done what his twin had so gallantly suggested. He had tried to entice conversations from her in the beginning but quickly realised it was futile. She had wrapped herself up in her Peacekeeper shell. Back to square one.
D’Argo repeated the question adding John’s name trying to snap him back. It worked. “Uh? Oh, they want to go down to the planet, but I don’t think it is a good idea.” It was Crais who surprised them all by adding his view.
“If I may make a comment?” He ventured. When they nodded he continued hesitantly. “I think that it would be good for all concerned if we relaxed. This plan has got us all very tense. If we go into battle like that we are likely to fail. I suggest that we go down to this planet, just for a solar day. Enjoy each others company and have some recreational time.”
John opened his mouth then shut it again. Crais’s eyes darted from him to Aeryn. Was it some kind of code? He had tried to get John and Aeryn to talk; he had shocked the crew with his concern for the two. He realised then; it was Aeryn most of all who needed to relax, to forget her worries and her grief for a few arns. He couldn’t deny her that. Frell he couldn’t deny her anything.
“Pilot? Can you check out the planet below? Give us the low down on it?”
Pilot flickered in to view on the clamshell. “The low down Commander? That would mean the relevant information required for a visit?” If Pilot could have shown emotion, it would have been one of confusion.
John laughed. “Yeah Pilot, like I said, the low down.” He laughed again when Pilot attempted to mimic the Earth slang.
“Yes Commander, I will get you the low down straight away.”
John shifted his weight on the cot. Not exactly the most comfortable of beds but he couldn’t complain – well not really. A prisoner - but not in the way he was used to. That had to count for something. He smiled again. Well, at least he could have fun ribbing Crais about this being his fault! He had been the voice of reason. The one who had clinched it. Nah, John knew it was he who had set the ball rolling by asking Pilot to get the information. Chiana had all but knocked him over when she heard him say that.
“Ahhh, my favourite alien! I knew you couldn’t resist me, thanks John.” She wrapped her arms around his neck. He could have sworn that a flicker of emotion crossed Aeryn’s stony face. No, no way, probably just wishful thinking.
He prised Chiana’s arms from his neck. “Don’t get too excited. Pilot still has to see if it’s safe. And if it is Pip, just remember, no trouble!” She snaked her hips closer to his and smiled seductively.
“You could always be my guard, if you like…”
“Yeah, right! I’ve just managed to shake off the trouble in paradise reputation. I don’t want it back darlin” He backed away from her, trying to keep her at arms length. When she proceeded to follow he put his arms in the air with a nervous laugh. “Ok, ok you win, we’ll look out for each other k?” She seemed happy with that and smiled running out, no doubt getting herself ready for the trip. John shook his head. “Pip, we need…”
She didn’t let him finish. “It’s fine John, Pilot said so”
John looked at the others “He did? Did I miss…?”
Pilot interrupted “Commander, my data banks have indicated that the planet below is called Ranor. They have no dealings with Peacekeepers. They neither like, nor dislike them. The information suggests that you would not be in any danger if you were to go down.”
John looked at the space where Chiana had been standing. “Well, looks like Mystic Meg was right again.” He walked out before the others could fathom what he was on about.
The guard rattled the bars of the cell jolting him back to the present. “Are you hungry Peacekeeper?” He propped himself up on the bed. No point in going through the usual drill of explaining that he wasn’t. The guard seemed friendly enough. Trust was such a hard thing for him now though. He chewed on his cheek and tilted his head to one side.
“Depends on what it is.”
The guard snorted. “It is adequate for prisoners. Do you want it or not?” The guard backed away from the cell door as John got up. He came over and eyed the food. Looked harmless enough. Stop it John! They haven’t mistreated you; they haven’t even come near you until now. The guard tried one last time. “Look Peacekeeper, yes or no? If you do not want it, then perhaps your mate will when she awakes.” He nodded his head over to the other cot where Aeryn was sleeping soundly.
John took the plate and sat it beside her bed. She probably wouldn’t want to eat when she woke, nope definitely not! He let out a small chuckle and returned to his cot. Who would have thought it? Aeryn Sun, Peacekeeper, person in control, kick ass fighter could get drunk and not just silly drunk! He should have known, since when did Aeryn do anything by halves? She had gotten skunk drunk.
Yep Aeryn Sun, drunken Peacekeeper was the one responsible for their current situation. Well, that wasn’t strictly true. He shouldn’t have intervened. Should have let them arrest her and them she would have the space she so desperately craved. Instead, she was locked up for a weeken with the one person she so badly wanted to avoid. Yep, she was going to be royally pissed when she woke – and not of the drunken variety either! His mind wandered again.
The bar was not crowded; some kind of music was playing in the background. It was a welcome relief that the occupant’s never gave the newcomers a second glance. Chiana had grabbed a table nearest the bar dragging John down beside her. D’Argo had sat with Jool and Rygel had found the perfect spot – beside two humanoids that were playing some kind of card game. Crais had hovered around Aeryn, waiting to see where she sat. He had become her unspoken bodyguard of sorts. She made her way over to a table near the door putting enough distance between herself and John that could be allowed in such a confined space.
“What do you want Chi?” John asked innocently scouring the bar for something vaguely familiar.
“Oh, what a question, what a question…” her voice trailed off and her hand laced his. He looked down, eyebrows creasing. He said nothing, just looked at their hands as if remembering something. She realised then, the way that she had entwined their fingers. She had seen him do it so many times before. Not with her though, never with her. She bit down on her lip. “Just kiddin old man, I’ll have Ralask as strong as it comes.” She released his hand brining him back to the present.
He nodded and turned to the rest of them. “Hey Mavrick? What do you want at the bar?” Rygel turned his head in the direction of the familiar voice, unsure if it was he who was being addressed. When he realised it was he indignantly pulled his body up to its full height.
“I am Dominar Rygel…” John cut him off.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever, what do you want Dominar?” He played along, understanding only too well that Rygel was probably trying to fleece the card players. Lulling them into a false pretence by telling them about his position in the Hyneiran Royal hierarchy.
“Ah, I will have volsar and roolesta my humble servant.” John rolled his eyes and headed for the bar.
After a few drinks, John felt better? No, that wasn’t the right word, more relaxed than he had in days. Chiana was good company; she was keeping him entertained with stories of her childhood. She had moved when he came back from the bar. He didn’t pay attention at first but realisation quickly hit him. She had positioned him so that his back was to Aeryn. Probably for the best he mused.
Aeryn however had a perfect view of the human. He was totally unaware of the attention she was giving him. Possibly because he had been so used to being ignored. She drained her drink at the thought of that. Crais looked at her, hesitant to speak but too worried not to.
“We could return to Moya if you so wish.”
Her eyes swayed alarmingly. She tried to focus on him. She blinked a few times then spoke slowly “No, this is what I need just now.” She picked up the fresh glass. Looking at him over the rim then downed it in one and spoke again “I don’t know what to do, tell me what I should do.”
He shifted uncomfortably. She was no longer looking at him but past him, as she had done since finding her seat. He turned to follow her gaze. John had his back to them. He was laughing with the Nebari. Not flirting, just laughing. “You should talk to him Aeryn. He is feeling your pain. He needs to know that you care, that he can trust you to be there for him when the time comes.”
Her eyes flew to him, anger firing them. “I would always be there for him. He knows that. Frell, after everything, he should know that.”
“After recent events, and your action towards him, he may need to be reassured. Think of the way you have treated him.”
She hung her head. “I know, but it’s so hard. Seeing him, so alive, yet remembering him dying in my arms. Knowing he is the same but not. Watching the pain in his eyes when he realised what I had with the other. Making him pay for it. I can’t go through all that again. You don’t know what it’s like to love then lose someone. We were trained. No emotion, no love, never become involved….”
He understood then, just how drunk she must be to open up like this - to share her feelings. She never did that. No, that wasn’t true, she did open up, she had opened up to him, the one she was looking at now. It wasn’t right that this should change now. He put a finger to her lips. She looked at him her eyes watery from grief and the amount of alcohol she had consumed. “It’s not me you should be telling Aeryn.”
She nodded quickly. “Maybe I should tell him, but he looks so relaxed, he is having fun.” She didn’t like the way that had sounded. It hadn’t meant to be so harsh. She couldn’t help it though and that made it worse. Who was she to feel jealous? She had pushed him away. She had chosen the other. She shook her head to clear the thoughts.
She grabbed Crais’ drink from him and swallowed it in one gulp. She stood, unsteady at first then tried to regain her composure. “Aeryn, I think we should go back. You can tell him in the morning, please…” She shrugged free of his grasped.
“No! I want to speak to him now.” She wanted to distance him from Chiana. She moved slowly, bumping into a chair and table as she went.
“Frell” whispered Chiana as she saw Aeryn staggering towards them. A sober Aeryn was bad enough her words could cut deep. A drunk Aeryn would be worse. John couldn’t handle that; she couldn’t handle that. He looked at her then, his expression quizzical, noticing the abrupt end to her story. She grabbed his arm and yanked him up. “Dance with me” It was all she could think to say. With that she pulled him forward so that he would be oblivious to the person staggering up behind them.
He was smiling. “Hell, it’s been a long time since I heard anyone say that.” He was on his feet and allowing her to move him in the direction of what passed as a dance floor. He put his arms around her waist; she in turn interlocked her fingers behind his neck and they began to sway to the music.
Aeryn stopped. Frozen to the spot, anger starting to rise. It was D’Argo who blocked her way. “No, Aeryn, leave him be.” It was barely a whisper, but it was heavy with purpose.
She smiled sadly at him.
“S’ok I just need to speak to him, le-me speak to him.” When he made no attempt to move she stamped hard on his foot. He let out a yelp but it was enough of a distraction to allow her to move quickly to the dance floor.
Chiana closed her eyes. She could smell the alcohol on his breath. If it had been just the two of them she would have stood a chance. Could have worked her charm. Made him forget for a few arns. The voice at her ear caused her eyes to snap open. “May I have this dance?” It was soft but menacing. She looked to the voice. Aeryn swayed unsteadily in front of her. She cursed. She really had thought that if they were dancing, Aeryn wouldn’t make a scene. She was about to give her a reply when John spoke.
“As long as you promise not to stand on my feet” He was looking at Aeryn intently. His lips curled into a small smile. He didn’t know where this was going, didn’t care as long as she was there. He would take anything she offered Chiana thought bitterly. She released John and moved away, saying nothing.
The body in the cot next to his stirred. He looked over – still sleeping. Jeez, he should have realised how drunk she was. He was just so happy that she was that close to him and speaking. It didn’t matter that she was swaying unsteadily or that she was looking at him with a confused, sad stare. He should have told her to go, should have told her to sober up. Yep those shouldas will kill you every time he thought ruefully. He thought back, relishing the memory of her touch.
She had laced her hands around his neck as she had seen Chiana do. His arms hung at his side, his eyes never leaving hers. “Hold me like you held her.” The voice was slow, sultry and slurry. He complied. His head screamed that it wasn’t right; his heart was louder. They moved together, none speaking. He was vaguely aware of the others. Looking at them, waiting for something to happen.
He felt her breath tickle his neck and a gasp escaped his lips. Playing with fire Johnny boy. Gonna get burnt all over again. With that thought, he slowed the movement. “What is this about Aeryn?” He whispered, closing his eyes, waiting for the moment where she would shatter his heart with her words.
“N,nothin, just dance. Want to feel you.” Her eyes were hazy, her footing unsteady.
Yep, fool that he was, he could deny her nothing. God he should have walked away – why hadn’t he walked away? Her lips traced his neck causing him to involuntary tighten his grip on her waist. It was his grip that kept her upright, he was sure of that. His mind still screamed his heart still won.
Her lips trailed slowly along his jaw line, finding his lips. They kissed softly, moving with the music all the while. He pulled back then, his mind finally winning over his fragile heart. He couldn’t have her this way – drunk. Was she kissing him or a ghost?
She tried to move back to his lips but he pulled further away. “Is it me your kissing Aeryn?” She looked at him puzzled, trying all the while to pull him closer. “Is. It. Me?” He emphasised the last word hoping that she understood. And she did. She pulled back with such speed that he almost lost his balance. She took in her surroundings as if seeing them for the first time. Then her eyes settled on him.
“I…you…I” she floundered. He came forward, reaching out to take her arm. The look on her face burned itself into his memory. She was confused, hurt, and angry all at once. She lashed out and hit him. He fell to his knees, startled by the reaction, not expecting it.
Then all hell broke lose. At first he thought the ringing was in his ears. Then he wished it was. It was an alarm. The dance floor quickly became crowded. He was being pulled to his feet and Aeryn was just being pulled. He was vaguely aware of someone reading her - her rights? Sure sounded like it. He spoke above the din. “She’s drunk, its ok I don’t want to press charges she’s drunk, please.” His voice was lost in the noise that pursued. He heard her shout. Not in frustration, in pain. He waded though the crowd. Guards were holding her down. “Get off her, she’s drunk, she won’t harm…” One of the guards was thrown to the side. “You” He finished lamely.
It would have been funny if she were not in such a delicate state of mind. Another guard was thrown to the side. The third however raised what John thought to be a pulse pistol to her chest. “No!” He yelled and made a grab for the gun. One of the toppled guards grabbed his hand. He swung round and caught the guard full on the face. The guard went down again. He turned his attention back to the gun swiping at it too late. It went off with a pop and Aeryn stilled alarmingly quickly. John grabbed the gun and belted the guard with it. The victory was short lived when the other two pinned him down swiftly.
“Keep calm Peacekeeper, it is just a sedative.” He proceeded to read him some kind of law rights. John looked at them then to Aeryn. He felt the relief wash over him.
“Frell John, and you said I was bad.” As ever, Chiana tried to inject some humour. He tore his eyes away from Aeryn and gave her a lopsided grin.
“Glad you find this amusing Pip. Now, Wanna tell them that we mean them no harm? We come in peace? We would like to leave now? All of the above?”
She smiled but it was Crais who spoke. “Sorry Crichton, I have spoken to the officer in charge. It seems that they are extremely anti-violent. You have broken one of their sacred laws. You will have to be detained.” He saw John try to struggle. “No, no, do as they say. You will be released. It is simple. We will go back to Moya and return for you when you have served your time.” John scowled. Was Crais enjoying this?
He heard her mutter under her breath. Oh, oh, she was wakening. He wondered vaguely if he should ask the guard for another cell; half hoping that she would fall asleep again. She had been sedated and she was drunk. Nope, no such luck. She was awake now.
“What the frell?” It was a whisper but he heard it. He looked over to her. She hadn’t noticed him; she was looking at the bars in front of them. Still groggy then he mused. He remained still trying to prolong the moment. Her eyes slowly found his. “I have to be dreaming” There was a hint of a smile on her face.
Definitely still drunk he thought. Or amnesia? Nah, never be that lucky. “Ummm, hi, glad to see you’re awake. How do you feel?” He swung his legs off the cot but didn’t dare make a move to approach her. He longed just to hold her. Those precious few moments on the dance floor were worth the predicament they were in now.
She stretched and sat up. “Like someone is banging the inside of my head with a hammer. Tell me I haven’t somehow acquired Harvey.”
Now he was confused. Why the hell was she being so nice? His confusion quickly turned to worry when he found her watching him, smiling. “Err, Aeryn, do you remember what happened? What is the last thing you remember?” Did he want to know?
She mimicked his action and swung her legs round. “Hmmm, drink, a bar, drink, Chiana, drink, dancing…dancing? I was dancing with John…with you?” Well that was good. She remembered what had happened – well some of it anyway.
“Well, yeah, that’s about right, anything else?”
She was looking at him strangely. She hiked her legs back up and curled herself into a ball. “Death, I remember death.” Then she was silent.
He cursed. She remembered all right, she had thought it was her John that she was dancing with. Now she was hurt all over again. Why the hell did he dance with her? Why the hell did he do anything that involved her? He drew his knees up to his chin. He had to explain, but explain what? That she had come on to him? That she was so drunk she hadn’t realised what she was doing?
“I think we should talk Aeryn” He watched as she turned slowly towards him.
“Do you ever want anything else Crichton?”
“Oh, I want a lot of things. But I’ve learned, people who want don’t get” He could let the name slide, he would wait.
Her stare was positively evil. “Good! Leave me the frell alone!”
What could he say that would possibly make a difference? Did he dare try? “Aeryn…” He stopped, unsure of what to say.
“How did you do it?” It was barely a whisper. He looked at her unsure if he had heard correctly. He opened his mouth but she continued. “How could you love me knowing you had lost me?”
Her eyes were wet. Could he do this? Could he inflict more pain on the one person who had kept him sane and alive all this time? The look in her eyes told him that he had no other choice. “Aeryn, you may not believe this, but I have been there, where you are now”
That got her attention.
“I held you in my arms, knowing you were dead. I wanted to join you, thought that there was no reason for living. Then, by some miracle, you were alive again. I thought about turning my back, thinking about better the devil you know. But hey? When did I ever take the easy option?” That earned him a wane smile. “I thought that it would be better to have loved and lost, than to never love at all. But answer me this.” He waited until she looked at him. “Am I lost Aeryn?” The question hung in the air.
It took her several microts to realise what he was asking. She sat up, moving to face him. Choosing her words carefully she spoke softly. “No, you’re not lost John. You will never be lost. I will always be there for you. I will always be by you’re side. I just don’t know if…”
He stopped her. “I know, I know. We were friends first though Aeryn, before everything we were friends first. Can’t we at least get back to that?”
The desperation in his voice tugged at her heart. “Friends? That would be…nice.”
It was a start a shaky one but a start none the less. “Good, Why don’t we start by introducing ourselves?” She smirked, confused as always by his interpretation of things. He continued, “My name is John Crichton, pleased to meet you.” He held out his hand.
She looked to his outstretched hand, then to his face. That face; it had caused her so much pain, so much joy. She rose from the bed and took it. “Aeryn Sun, ex-peacekeeper, kick ass fighter.”
He laughed, “Oh, and don’t I know it, don’t I know it. Well Aeryn Sun, kick ass fighter, tell me about your life.”
And she did.
