Worthless Reflections: Malachite
Well, according to the information I have gathered, and based on witness accounts and general study and research, I have come to a conclusion: I am not gothic.. Although my appearence and disposition reveal otherwise, I feel that the more important things, which make up one's state of mind, such as musical interests, sexual relations, sociability, attitude about bodily contaminants and fetishes of mine, do not correspond with those of real goths.. Besides that, my website doesn't even have the word "Gothic" in the title, nor do I have my own goth-code or even a dark poetry page.. Now, what can be more un-goth than that??
My presumed "gother-than-thou" and self-pitious attitudes which I apparently demonstrate are unacceptable by "the scene" as well. I have taken every gothic or vampire test that I have run across and failed all but one (which was simply because the directions said to give myself a point for every question I answered correctly: If you don't know the correct answer, then it's wrong.. obviously so long as I answer truthfully, I know I'm right, thus scoring perfectly), which leads me to believe that although I am not totally un-goth, I am, however, not goth enough. In fact, lets do a quick run down of the "Take a Bite - The Goth Test" by Sexbat(? correct me if I'm wrong)..it would help if you had it handy for reference purposes, because I'm not going to post it here..
Section 1 - What *do* you look like?
1. yes, my hair is black, purple and white
2. yes, I dye it
3. no, whenever it fades or my roots come through
4. no, every week is ridiculous
5. no, I have never used, nor have any aspiritions to use hair extensions
6. yes, hairspray is disgusting...period
7. no, I own three eyeliner pencils, and far more ordinary ones
8. yes, on occasion, when my makeup doesn't come off, I wear it to bed... and I usually do go to bed..
9. only when I wear foundation which is only for special photograph oportunities in order to cover blemishes, rather than to appear more pale
10. not usually, it takes me only as long as it takes to put on my clothes, eyeliner, accessories and jacket, which equals hardly an hour
11. yes, I have used cd's and the such, instead of mirrors, but I don't believe I could apply eyeliner painlessly without any reflective materials
12. no, I have never been asked if I sharpen my feet, I have never worn pointy shoes, and even if I did, I wouldn't admit it
13. no, the number of toes I have are far more than the number of buckles I wear, considering the fact I only own four, the one on my belt, the one on the belt of my leather jacket, the one on the belt of my trench coat(which isn't really even a buckle) and the one on my spiked collar
14. yes, I have worn fishnet on my arms, everytime I feel the need to look gothic
15. no, but I'm sure I would set off metal detectors if I visited airports regularly
Section 2 - Music, Musicians, Muses
16. no, I think the Sisters of Mercy are terrible
17. no, I didn't even know there were actions
18-22. no, and as far as I am aware, I'd be better off not seeing any of those bands
23. yes, I can name the founders of Christian Death (scary)
24. I don't think so... I don't even know what 'ligged' means
25-30. no, all the answers to this section are no, I'm not into traditional "gothic" music
Section 3 - Clubs
31-40. all these answers are no as well (with the exception to 34. yes, I can do the chicken dance) I don't go to clubs
Section 4 - The Undead
41. yes, certain teeth I have are naturally pointy, but hardly vampiric
42. no, I try to keep my plastic vampire teeth as far away from my mouth as possible, except on Halloween
43. no, It did not result in the pricking of anyone else
44. no, I have not had sex with the undead, or even the dead for that matter
45. no, I don't know what a Wiredog Club is
46. no, as far as I know, I am not a vampire
47. I do have a reflection, which, oddly enough, enables me to apply my makeup
48. yes, I have drunk blood
49. yes, I have drunk human blood
50. no, not from a glass
Section 5 - On the Road
51-55. no, I have no dealings with fanzines or followings
Section 6 - At the Movies
56. no, I have never seen The Hunger
57-59 yes, I have seen Return of the Living Dead, Rocky Horror Picture Show, Addams Family(TV)
60. no, the Addams Family is better than the Munsters
Section 7 - Hardercore than thou
61. no, I don't own a Tarot Deck, I don't believe in interpreted divination
62. no, not a lot of wierd silver jewelry
63. yes, mainly black clothes
64. no, one pair of boots, one pair of sneakers and a pair of slippers
65. no, I don't know what Walk Away is
66. no, I don't own an inflatable banana and would be hesitant to admit it if I did.
67. no, ironically I've been told I'm not a goth more than I have been told that I am one
68. no, I rarely deny how people judge me because if people judge me other than how I am, they either don't know me well enough, or they perceive me differently than I perceive me
69. no, I've never refered to anyone as mini- or quatum-goths
70. yes, I love the rain, even though it upsets me
71. no, I've never been a part of alt.gothic, nor do I wish to be
72. yes, I have read Shelley
73. no, I don't think I have a fetish
74. yes, I have flirted with magick and other religions
75. yes, I fundamuntaly object to this test even though I scored over 80 points so far
Section 8 - What's the difference between a Casual and a Redneck?
76. no, people on the streets don't talk to me...they talk about me
77. yes, I do get comments about Halloween being X months away
78. no, people don't recommend I see a counselor
79. no, my only pets include; cats, and a dog
80. no, my bedroom is sea-green with white flowers everywhere
81. yes, I suppose my parents fear something atrocious will occur if I stay in my bedroom for extended period of time
82. no, I usually wear sunglasses only for the purpose they are supposed to serve
83. yes, I do go by another name on the net, not too sure if it's gothic though
84. no, I prefer, in real life, for people to call me by my real name, preferably my first name
85. yes, of course there's a difference
86. no, I haven't been propositioned by a drunk Casual/Redneck
87. no, I didn't hospitalize them
88. no, I didn't even hospitalize them in a really messy way either
89. no, I don't talk to, look at or acknowledge the existence of any kinds of these people
90. no, no scars
Section 9 - Brown Questions (Art&Literature)
91-93. yes, I've read Poe, Dante and some Shelley
94. I don't know who was "Mad, Bad and Dangerous to know"
95. yes, I can tell the difference between Norman and Gothic Churches
96-97 yes, I've read Lovecraft and Gothic Novels
98. no, I haven't read de Sade
99. yes, I do like pre-raphelite and romantic art
100. yes, I own a CD of Verdi's Requiem, and I've even written poems to it
Section 10 - Courtesy of the University of London Union Old Goth Barstaff Soc.
101. no, I don't think I could even name one of the bands under the Merciful Release label
102. no, I don't even know who the Birthday Party are, let alone what they used to be called
103. I don't know who plays "House Music for Goths", and I'd rather not
104. no, I don't own a pair of crimpers
105. no, I don't tie an obscene number of scarves around my waist
106. yes, that means that you have a little problem with style
107. no, I can't say I have ever been a part of a pyramid other than in my 7th grade gym class
108. no, I really don't care what the name of Eldritch's cat is either
109. who really gives a shit if God drives a white Mercedes
110. Snow White is the fairest of them all
Section 11 - Drugs
111. yes, I hate to say it but I have smoked
112. ...a clove, a Marlborough and a Black Death
113. no, I've never had speed before breakfast
114. not instead of breakfast either...I've never had speed.. ever
115. no, caffine and sunlight have little importance to me, neither of which I value over the other
So, as you can see by the perfect score which I have aquired by this test, according to it, I am gothic. But, had the directions been more clear, I would not be. And as you can see, since I don't wear pointy shoes, or hair extensions, the conclusion I have drawn is valid. I am not gothic like I once thought I was. This also has been reinforced by witness accounts as well. Apparently, I am not gothic to gothic people, which seems logical, but when you are told by 3 different cheerleaders after they've spoken with you, that they "thought you were gothic, but your not", you suddenly realize how un-goth you really are.. So, as you can clearly see, not only am I not deemed gothic by real goths, I am not even deemed gothic by cheerleaders. In fact, come to think of it, I think I can draw several similarities between the two, but I have no reason to offend the cheerleaders..
Just so you know, by sticking a piece of coal up my ass, a diamond would not be the result. I do realize the test is fun and all, I'm just taking it to a different level
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