What's the difference between a porcupine and the Dean Dome? -A porcupine has 30,000 pricks on the outside.

There's a guy from UNC driving from Chapel Hill to Durham, and a guy from Duke driving from Durham to Chapel Hill. In the middle of the night, with no other cars around, they hit each other head on. The Dukie manages to climb out of his car and survey the damage. He looks at his twisted car and says, "Man, I am really lucky to be alive!" Likewise, the Tar Heel scrambles out of his car and looks at his wreckage. He too says, "I can't believe I survived this wreck!" The UNC guy walks over to the Duke guy and says, "Hey man, I think this is a sign that we should put aside our petty differences and live as friends instead of arch rivals." The Duke guy thinks for a moment and says, "You know, you're absolutely right! We should be friends. We should celebrate." So the Duke guy pops open his trunk and finds a full, unopened bottle of Jack Daniels. He says to the Tar Heel guy, "Let us toast to our newfound understanding and friendship." The Tar Heel says, "You're right!" And he grabs the bottle and starts drinking down Jack Daniels. After putting away nearly half the bottle, the Tar Heel hands it back to the Dukie and says, "Your turn! The Duke guy twists the cap back on the bottle and says, "Nahh, I think I'll wait for the cops to show up."

What's the first thing a Carolina girl does when she wakes up in the morning? -Walks home.

Did you hear that Dean Smith is dressing only 6 players for the tournament? -The rest can dress themselves.

Why can't they have Christmas in Chapel Hill? -They can't find a virgin and three wise men.

UNC researchers announced that they've just discovered another use for sheep: Wool.

What does a Carolina graduate say to a Duke graduate? -Would you like fries with that?

The only good thing that ever came out of Chapel Hill was 15-501 to Durham.

What is the difference between a UNC fan and a three-week-old puppy? -At some point, the puppy will stop whining.

How many UNC frat boys does it take to change a tire? -One, but he gets a lab credit.

What do you call 30 Carolina fans in a basement? -A whine cellar.

Did you hear about the Duke student who transferred to UNC? -The average IQ of both schools went up.

What does a Carolina student call a Duke student after graduation? -Boss.

Why did God make the sky Carolina blue? -So we wouldn't have to step in it.

What's the difference between a Carolina coed and a phone booth? -Only three football players fit in a phone booth.

What do you get when you cross a pig with a Carolina student? -Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.

A Carolina grad showed up at the emergency room one autumn day with a back injury. Naturally, the doctor queried as to how the injury had occured. The man responded that he was raking leaves and fell out of the tree.

How many Carolina fans does it take to screw in a light bulb? -None. The world revolves around them.

How many UNC fans does it take to change a light bulb? -All of 'em. Three to get it in, 10 to hang the banner, and the rest to brag about it.

After last season Dean Smith called the team together and asked them to be pallbearers when he died. He wanted them to let him down one last time.