Reviews:
"Bowling for Columbine"
Michael Moore's witty take on the problems besetting America is timely, essential viewing.


"28 Days Later"
This film has had awful reviews, but I think it is great!
A low budget is more than compensated for by excellent acting and a really terrifying storyline about a post-apocalyptic Britain inhabited by people infected with a deadly Rage virus.
Best scene - the church piled high with bodies, with graffiti saying "the end is definitely f@@@@@@ nigh".
"The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers"
A stunningly lavish film, which is very faithful to the book. Not quite as good as the first episode, but then The Two Towers is the weakest book in the trilogy. Very highly recommended. I can't wait till next year to see the next instalment.


Click here if you want to watch Holby City whilst getting very drunk indeed - in fact this the only way you will be able to sit through an entire episode without switching over.

Here is my guide to disaster movies. It can easily be adapted as a drinking game - if any of these things happen when you are watching a disaster movie, drink a finger.
Warning - don't do this while watching the Poseidon Adventure, you will get very drunk very quickly.

A cuddly animal escapes imminent danger
No-one believes the captain / pilot / police officer
A subordinate disobeys the captain
The designers of the building / ship / plane have skimped on safety
A husband and wife are reunited
A junior crew member saves the day
The camera wobbles to simulate a collision / earth tremor
A woman or child refuses to be rescued
The captain attempts unconvincingly to reassure everyone
A crew member / passenger turns to prayer
There is an obvious escape route. It is blocked
An old person can't make it and has to be left behind
A token black guy dies
There is a thwarted rescue attempt
The ship's captain performs a marriage ceremony
There is a heavily pregnant woman on board
The captain assists in her labour
Ridiculous pseudo-scientific explanation for the disaster
The ship / building / plane is named after its designer
The designer is on board
The disaster takes place during a special occasion
There is cross-cutting between the celebrations and the impending doom
A sinner repents
Someone speaks in a ludicrous foreign accent / regional dialect
A woman screams hysterically
Someone slaps her
A disaster is averted as a countdown reaches 2 seconds
A blip on a radar screen heralds the disaster
The only radio cuts out
None of the survivors have mobile phones
An animal is endowed with a sixth sense
There is a close up of the captain as he hears bad news
The approaching threat is seen through binoculars / a telescope
A trite statement is made about the awesome power of Nature / God
The captain / designer goes down with the ship / plane / building
The building / ship / plane switches to the back-up generator for power. The lights dim
There is a harmless fall through sugar glass
A woman faints
A dead person is covered with a jacket
Someone uses a jacket to cover their head as they enter a burning room
A passenger performs an emergency tracheotomy / resuscitation / appendectomy
A passenger flies the plane under instructions from ground control
A suitably qualified individual is on board to perform an important task
Dark secrets emerge
Dead people look pink, and not blue/grey
The passengers rebel against authority
A passenger improvises an emergency net / rope ladder
Relations or lovers exchange a smouldering look
Someone reenters the building / ship / plane to retrieve jewellery / money / sentimental heirloom / pet
A child comes up with a precocious observation
There is a ludicrously overacted death scene
An object turns out to be exactly the right length to bridge a gap
People talk to corpses
The words "He / she would have wanted us to . . ." are uttered
Rescuers arrive in the nick of time
People's phobias are miraculously overcome
There is a moralistic ending
A passenger makes a stirring speech
Fake pyrotechnics make the blaze look more impressive
A maverick is proved right all along
A passenger makes the sign of a cross / fumbles with rosary beads
A close up of potentially faulty machinery is shown
Passenger runs into a fire but is unaffected by smoke inhalation
A passenger nursing a fatal wound insists that they are ok. A bomb has three coloured wires which must be defused
Passengers escape through air ducts / service shaft
A room fills with sand or water
A fat or short person gets stuck
A character sacrifices themselves to save the group
An item which would have saved everyone malfunctions
A character suffers a crisis of faith
Ominous music / creaking noises signal impending disaster
A character is exhorted not to look down.
They look down.
A character is wearing completely unsuitable footwear
Passengers run about in unneccessarily skimpy clothing
A fight delays the group's escape
Electrical objects work underwater
The group is told to wait x minutes for the lead character to return
A signal is requested if something goes wrong
The lead character is late in returning
Daylight is glimpsed through a narrow exit
Implements are around just when characters need them
A character rediscovers a long lost skill
A character is unable to escape due to a restraint
Just when the protagonists think they are safe, another danger is revealed
There are random and unexplained fires everywhere
Heroic music signals a possible rescue
Passengers look back to see boat sinking / building collapsing
A character discovers superhuman strength at a critical moment
A character wishes that they were dead instead of a victim
Bit of ship or building collapses under someone's weight