dougzone
Fourth Secret of Fatima revealed
Snelgrove – Fatima, a town renowned for startling revelations, has been in the news of late, once again. Pope J2P2 announced an 83-year-old secret a few days ago and today another secret of Fatima has been proclaimed.
The story so far:
Back in 1917, three preteens allegedly saw a vision of the “Virgin” Mary. Not only did She appear to these punks but She also spoke to them!
The three “secrets” included Her immaculate heart being the supreme remedy, Russia would be converted and, finally, that a pope would be assassinated.
Well, how about that? Pretty strange, eh!
Here at dougzone, this seemed like a little too much so an extensive investigation was begun. Using the ever-popular interview style of reporting, the truth about Fatima is, here, proclaimed. Speaking to you from inside a Tim Horton’s in Snelgrove, Ontario, it’s the Virgin Mary.
dougzone: Good morning, Miss Mary! Can we call you that?
VM: You can call me anything but late for dinner!
dougzone: Ah, Mary, you’ll have to speak up. You are inside a muffin!
VM: Damn it all to hell! I have to get a new agent!
dougzone: That’s much better. Our readers want to know your side of the Fatima story. It has been in the papers that a third “secret” of yours was, finally, revealed just last week.
VM: Rubbish! Utter rubbish! I didn’t have any secrets and likely never will.
dougzone: No, you don’t get it. You apparently told some kids some things that were kept secret for all this time.
VM: No, YOU don’t get it. The truth is that I was never anywhere near Fatima that day! I remember that day vividly. I had the worst case of cramps that I have ever had and could barely breath let alone make an apparition.
Best god damn ISP in town
Virgin Mary at Tim's
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