It wasn't long before she found herself immersed in a stack of legal documents. The D.A. had informed her that he was in the process of preparing for a sensational murder trial and the workload would be heavy for quite some time. He added that her work must be flawless as there was no room for error when dealing with a case as crucial as this. Stirrings of doubt once again fluttered inside Tamara but she brushed them aside, telling herself that she was experiencing 'first day jitters'. "I can meet the standards set before me," she thought. "Of course I can."

By the end of the month though, the strain of keeping her work up to par was taking its toll. Even though her boss had told her to slow down, she often worked well into the night, determined to complete the work placed before her each day. Her mother's frequent telephone calls were also creating a tension in her. She was also disappointed to discover that although her co-workers were quite friendly, they didn't include her in their activities outside the office setting. Things weren't as she had thought they'd be. All she seemed to do was work and sleep. Her one respite from the frustrations of her day was the solace and peace she found in a tiny park by her home. While sitting there on the bench she could unwind and relax, while the wind rustled through the trees and the birds sang their sweet songs. She felt revitalized while there...able to put things into perspective and shut out the madness of her day.

It would have been great if she could have spent all of her time there, but living in a dream world wouldn't pay the bills. So each morning she set out for work, trying to ignore the exhausted feeling that seemed to be ever-present. She would never admit that her job was too demanding...that would suggest defeat...a word that had no room in her vocabulary. As a result, she became even more tense. Tears were never far from the surface.

One afternoon while searching for a file, she was suddenly seized with an awful feeling of panic. Her heart pounded...she was dizzy and all strength seemed to have left her body. She held onto the cabinet and waited for it to pass. It lasted only a minute or two, yet it left her bathed in a cold sweat. Her boss, noticing her distress, asked her if she was alright. "I'm fine, sir. Just the heat, I would think." she said. She wished she could tell him how she really felt but such would be a display of weakness. And she actually did feel okay. Whatever it was had gone. She carried on once again...the efficient, dauntless Tamara.

Several uneventful weeks passed before she had another such attack and before long, she was having them several times a week. She needed help! She made an appointment to see a doctor the following day.

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