Conclusion

After what has been an exhausting year, the final culmination of this educationally and spiritually rewarding exercise to find the world's biggest "homo" has arrived.
There have been so many worthy of recognition, but three absolute standouts.

After a lengthy appeal process to see himself back in the competition, Jamal Asad Hamidi has secured himself third place with unrelenting bitching and backstabbing and so much more.

In second place, the crowd favourite, Andrew Grant Reeves. There is little doubt that he is the best the Eastern Suburbs has ever produced.

And without further ado...
It is with great pleasure that I announce the winner.
Truly, no man can claim to be more deserving of this award than Leighton "Gayton" James Aurelius. Leighton has relied heavily on his wealth of girlfriend related misery to become the depressed, drunken, moody bitch that he is. Congratulations my friend! And happy birthday for the 16^th.

A special note should be made of Christiana Glasson, who because of her gender was sadly unable to partake in this competition, but surely would have done well. She is reminiscent of a female Leighton. The reverse Leighton. Or in this politically correct world, maybe Leighton is the Anti-Christiana.

The erratic movements up and down in rankings that the contenders experienced during the competition was not, as I first believed, the result of inconsistent and possibly mentally unstable voters, but rather a reflection on the phases the contenders were going through in their personal lives. That is why it was necessary to run the competition over such a long period of time, to get a feel for their average performance.