Gaming Lust (and no I'm not talking that way!)

     This article goes out to all those video gaming freaks out there!! Gimme a hell yeah!!!
This doesn't apply to anyone who thinks a Playstation is made by Playschool. And all those guys who play racing games(heh heh)

          It's a quiet Saturday night just after six. You finish dinner and the family goes about their business. It's just about that time when the thought creeps into your head. Then you race to the TV and you see your prize.
        There is the Sony funbox just waiting for you to delve into it's 64 bit world of endless fun. And so you do you pop in your old game into the 'station and begin to play the same game you've been playing for the last year. Then........it hits you......like a big sack of billiard balls dropped from the Sears tower. THIS GAME SUCKS. Not because it's a sucky game, but because it has nothing more to offer you. You've seen all of the game, beaten it tons of times, know every secret. It's just boring now and you can't play it anymore. The thrill is gone......but not to fear. There are other games out there........ and this is where I come to the point. You look to a gaming magazine(I favor EGM) and look for the newest game on the market that you can afford. You look and you look but you don't find anything interesting at all. Then you turn the page and are consumed. You find it, the game you absolutely must have. Your life would be incomplete without it.  You would do anything for this game, clean your room, take out the garbage, hell even get a summer job!!! You tell yourself NOTHING WILL STAND IN MY WAY!!!!! That my friends is what I call Gaming Lust. It's not an official clinical affliction yet but I'm trying!!! I know some of you reading this must be scratching your heads right now so I will explain further. I will use some examples. You know that trashy romance movie Romeo and Juliet(again the heads get scratched) Well you are Romeo and this game is Juliet, but the only thing you want to stick is the CD in your Playstation. When the dream of playing this game consumes your every thought. When you actually stop thinking about sex for a minute to devise a strategy to get your hands on this game. When you think the Nutcracker is something you did off the high dive(huh?)And no the Gaming Lust doesn't end there. it extends to the time you get the game pop it into the Playstation and fire it up!!!
             You will sit there for hours upon hours playing till your fingers get numb. Nothing can interrupt your playing binge except eating and sleeping and when you eat it is in front of the TV. But there is a cure (thank God) The Gaming Lust can only be cured by beating this game!!! Only when you have beaten it can you return to normal life. This truly is a horrible affliction but unlike chicken pox you don't get it only once. You keep getting it over and over again and  it's worse every time until the momentous occasion arrives. You reach the rank of an official experienced gamer!!!! Quite an achievement I should say. Many young fledgling gamers never make it this far. They're stopped by something. Some event that puts the breaks on the bandwagon so to speak. Be it the 'station breaks or the money just ain't there or you just don't give a shit anymore. The later is the most appalling to me, how dare you just throw away the trade we have so graciously bestowed upon you! All gamers are brothers  we may be divided into ranks but we do stick together. All gamers share with each other, it's true. I am proud to say I am part of the upper ranks of gamers, not the greatest I admit but certainly above an experienced gamer. I have surpassed the ranks of gamer, experienced gamer, war tested gamer, gaming nut, and gaming freak. I am officially a Controller. The title of controller is when you can bring out the beauty of a game with only the controller to use, no gameshark, no cheats, no nothing. The ability to copy exactly the maneuvering ability of the demo play sections. Yes I'm that damn good! But enough about me. I kind of got off the subject oh well this article is getting pretty long so I'll end it.

Next Issue: "Writer's block and other difficulties of speaking your mind"