Title: April Showers and April Fools
Author: AaronR
Email: raaaron@mindspring.comRating: F – for floof!
Summary: Logan HATES April Fools Day, passionately.
Category: Rogue/Logan (duh)
Disclaimer: They aren't mine, but I would still play with them if they were!
Archive: Like I'd say no?
Feed back?: Does Jubes like yellow? Hella Yeah!
Dedication: To my Roommate, who's going to kill me when she gets home, but, hey, that's what April Fools Day is about! Hooray for strings and toothpaste! (Hey, she deserves it for the whole "Spaghetti Incident." I'm still finding pasta in the ventilation.)
Author's Notes: I PITY 'DA FOO!Logan was hiding today, for a good reason. Today was probably the most dangerous day of the year in the Mansion. Hell, he'd rather go up against Magneto with nothing but a pie plate any day, as long as he didn't have to go outside to do it. Logan may not have been the smartest person in the mansion, but he wasn't dumb, and if three years of living in the mansion had taught him anything, it was that you don't venture into the halls of Mutant High on April Fool's Day.
Ever. Under any circumstances.
"You comin' Sugah?" Marie was up and brushing her hair. Their room was big, but Marie's stuff had covered it like kudzu since she moved in for good.
"Nah, I think I'll just stay in today, watch some college hockey or something."
"What? Hon, the only thing is UGA vs. Alabama! It's ridiculous, those players haven't seen more than two inches of snow in their lives. Come on, you're going to miss Sunday Brunch."
Logan took time to appreciate how good Marie looked before answering. Her hair look so good all shiny and brushed, and her dress was hugging all her curves. Getting up, he sauntered over to her, burrowing his face in her hair and pressing him against him.
"We can have a lot of fun staying in…"
"Quit it Logan." Marie glared, but she couldn't hide the smile. "Anyway, I'm going shopping with Jubilee today."
"Jubilee's leaving?" That right there cut the April Fool's warning in half. "Are you sure?" Maybe he could make it to brunch and help himself to Xavier' s excellent Raspberry Cheesecake with the terror in yellow safely distracted in the mall.
Marie threw up her hands in exasperation. "Of course I'm sure, I just said we're going shopping. Honestly, Logan, you've been acting really weird all day."
'Just healthy paranoia.' He though to himself.
"What time will you be back?" He needed to know what kind of window he had.
"Probably 'round tree, but you know Jubes. Send out a search party if we're not back by dark."
"Will do, darlin'." He gave her a kiss on her hair.
"Hey," Marie's eyes took on a particularly malicious glint. "Wanna come with us?"
"Crazy, not stupid, babe."
"Roguey!" He froze. "Common, girl, Sack's opened, like, an hour ago! All the good stuff's going to be gone!"
"Coming!" She gave him a quick peck on his sideburns. "See'ya, Logan."
"Bye Marie."
"Bye Wolvster."
Logan growled, not that it did any good. He followed them to the garage, just to make sure they were REALLY leaving. He'd failed to do this last year and The Horror Child had ambushed him with a can of vegetable soup over his door and a Polaroid camera. He still didn't know why he'd let her live, especially when the pictures had showed up on the School's web page. Well, not this year Jubilation.
Satisfied that they'd really left, Logan cautiously made his was down to the main dining room, checking the top of all doors and in the corners. There were still plenty of other miscreants about.
The dinning room was pretty empty for a Sunday morning, Storm and Jean were sitting at one of the round tables, empty dished littering the surface between them. Grabbing a plate and piling food on it, Logan made his way over.
"Hey Jeannie, 'Ro."
"Morning, Logan."
"Good day, Logan."
He plopped down in one of the chairs and began to eat, shoveling food in to his mouth. No need to stay in enemy territory any longer than was strictly necessary. Use to Logan's anti-social behavior, Storm and Jean continued talking about Storm's planned improvements to the gardens.
"It is the perfect time for planting perrineals, the rain is good for them."
"Yes, you know what they say, 'April showers bring May flowers.'"
"Indeed."
Logan paused, something wasn't right, it had been sunny just a few minutes ago.
"It's raining?"
Both women looked at him like he'd just grown a third arm. He looked over to the bay windows on the opposite side of the room. Sure enough, it was pouring down rain.
"Huh." He must have been too preoccupied with the dangers of living in a house full of punk kids with weird senses of humor to notice. He really had to start paying more attention. This, he decided, was a sign from the Mutant Gods that it he should stay in bed until this day from hell was over. Good plan.
Muttering goodbye to Ro and Jean, he deposited his tray in the kitchen and carefully made his way back upstairs.
Safely back in his room, he locked the door. No one was getting in. THIS year, he was going to make it through April Fools unscathed.
Grabbing the remote, he settled in the overstuffed chair. Sure enough, there was nothing on but UGA and Alabama playing bad hockey. After three minutes, Logan had new grounds for his "Southerners-can't-play-Hockey-and-shouldn' t-try" speech. In a thoroughly foul mood, Logan turned off the TV. It was bad enough that he was basically under house arrest, but now there was nothing good on TV. Growling, Logan threw himself down on the bed.
They couldn't stop him from napping.
An hour later he was woken by a crash of thunder. Looking up to see rain blowing in though the open window, he rushed to close it before his collection of Mechanic magazines got ruined. As he was struggling with the swollen sill, something caught his eye.
His and Marie's room was on the corner of one of the wings. It had two windows, one facing east and one facing south. He was currently struggling with the southern window that currently faced out into a horrible thunderstorm. Outside the eastern window, though, the weather was beautiful.
Logan hated things that didn't make sense. This most definitely didn't make sense.
Magazines forgotten, Logan carefully approached the sunny window. Sticking a hand out, he felt nothing but warm sunshine. On the other side of the room, the rain was still blowing in in sheets. He pulled his hand back in and walked over to the other window and put his hand out. It was raining, sure enough. Even more confused than he'd been a second ago, he went back to the sunny window. The weather was still beautiful and sunny with a blue sky. After a few moments of deliberation and three more hand checks, Logan's curiosity got the better of him. Slowly, he stuck his head outside to get a look at where the rain stopped and the sun began. As soon as he was hanging out the window up to his waste to see around the corner of the building, he heard it. The sound that had been burned into his brain every April Fool's day since he'd first come back to the mansion.
The snap-whirr of a camera.
Looking up, for one horrible second, everything froze, then he was greeted by a cascade of water. Gallons of water. Muddy, cold, gutter water. As soon as it started, it was over. Ending with another camera shutter snap. Pulling himself back inside, he roared. Rushing to the door, he yanked it, cursed, unlocked it, then burst into the hall and set off full speed toward the roof. Of course, there was no when he got up there, so he set off towards his next destination, the garage. If Marie's Jeep was there, then he knew they were somewhere in the building and he could start hunting. When he got there though, he was shocked to see Rogue and Jubilee just walking in, arms loaded with bags.
"Wolvie? What happened man? You look like you jumped over the wrong side of the ark."
Wolverine growled, stalking towards Jubilee. For her part, Jubilee quickly decided that descretion was the better part of valor and jumped behind Rogue.
"Logan, sweetie, I don't know what's happened, but Jubes has been with me all day. We just got back." Jubilee nodded frantically.
Logan seethed, then back