You?!?!  But we heard you were dead!
Answers to questions you didn’t ask:

Yes, he does have a banana in his pocket...but he's still happy to see you.  Obama tested, Hillary approved.  Where pelicans and hyperbole collide.
It's okay - he's wasting his time here too.
He's changing the outcome by measuring it.

He's 56% less evil than that dude in the cubicle next to you.
Mom, please...or Minute Rice and Cheese! 
He's more difficult than ten dimensional symmetry breaking.
I guess it goes from God...to Wiley...to you...to the cleaners.

He's brought to you by the Department of Redundancy Department.
He's been keeping the next Big Bang in check since 1982.
He's had ADD since he was...ooooh, hey, a paper clip!

How do you keep an idiot in suspense?
But my posse rolls four deep:
I'd like to give a shout-out to my homey
Fred McCann.
And a 'yeeeeeaaaaah booooyyyyyy' to Mike Huening,
Cody Stumpo and Matt Morse. They're the bomb!

Or something.
Wiley's Baby Boomer Lyric Database
Son?!!  I HAVE no son!!!!!
Wiley's Completely Useless Homepage
Yes, it IS an Easy Reader
Halloween Costume.
Photo Albums
Gourdfest 2007
Christmas 2007
Montana Vacation July 2007
Random People
The Benny Collective
South Carolina Vacation June 2008
Camping August 2008
Olivia Rose Wiley Born 11/12