Things
that make you say, “Hmmm, I’m getting fucked”
The whole conspiracy theory mentality has always amused me, although many
of my friends would tell you that I’m the original paranoia propaganda
peddler. The problem with any good conspiracy
is that, by design, it can’t be proven to exist. Who shot Kennedy? Who the
fuck knows? More importantly, who will
ever know for certain? And what about
the Roswell alien cover up crap? (the writers of the X-files seem to know
something about this. I think they were
part of the conspiracy then, and they’re trying to tell us something now!) My point is that IF these things, as
well as the myriad of other amazing but unproven conspiracy theory producing
events actually happened, it has already been decided by the “powers that be”
that we as a people can’t be trusted with the information. Now here’s where the conspiracy theorists
crack me up… They claim that all media
and information dispersal is controlled by “someone”, whose identity is unknown,
but non-the-less can’t be trusted (it’s amazing how the human species has
always feared and distrusted the unknown… That’s how God was invented you
know). Then what do they do? Well, the next logical step is to fill in
their own blanks about who killed Kennedy, or what happened to the bodies of
the aliens that crashed in Roswell, publish it, and then get it out to as many
loyal followers as possible. They’re
worse than the supposed “controllers of all media” whose master plan of public
ignorance they’re trying to expose. Oh
yeah, I’m really going to think that the NY Times is a propaganda machine for
the new world order, and that some sunken-eyed dweeb, living in his mother’s
basement, and publishing a crack web site on “thetruthisoutthere.com” has the
real scoop on what’s happening in the world.
What dumb fucks.
My experience has taught me that to understand something, I first need to
listen to what’s being said, and then to ask simple and direct questions to
clarify the gray areas. Along these
lines… here are some questions that came to mind today while I was at
work. I don’t have the answers, but I
think the questions are worth asking because asking eventually leads to
someone, somewhere answering!
1.
Why does the prime lending rate increase annually at an expediential
rate, while the interest rates on personal saving and checking accounts
fall? I can remember interest rates of
5.25% on savings accounts, the current rate average is .25%. It makes me wonder if I have the correct
definition of “inflation”? Maybe we
could substitute the word inflation with the phrase “Right to life, liberty,
and the pursuit of freedom fee”, annual increase.
2.
Why can’t we win wars anymore? The US had a great track record of kicking every country’s ass
that ever fucked with us, until the last 50 or so years. We’re proud to report that in 1776, a bunch
of farmers beat the British all the way back to England. We delight in great grandpa’s tales of how
an under-trained and unprepared army beat the krauts in WWI, and again in
WWII. But ever since we started valuing
foreign trade policy over American lives, our win record has fallen
sharply. It took us how long to squish
Iraq? And now we’re playing the same
game in Afghanistan. 2 months to crush
the Taliban? And Bin Laden is still
free?? It makes very little sense to
me, unless of course the point is to drag wars out as long as possible to boost
sales for Lockheed Martin, Boeing, and Chrysler.
3.
Why do Levis jeans cost like $40 fuckin dollars when we know
good and well that it costs less than $5 per pair in materials to make them?
4.
SEPTEMBER 11th – think about this… The federal government gave the airlines and
insurance companies billions of dollars to “bail them out” after the terrorist
attacks in NYC, while the families of the victims are getting their aid from
charity rock concerts and celebrity “Who wants to be a millionaire” (Of course
that’s only when the aid is not being stolen by the Red Cross). Did you know that the airlines, United in
particular, were already in serious financial trouble for completely unrelated
reasons prior to the attack? And don’t
try to tell me that the airlines lost billions because of a two-day
shutdown. And even if they did, any
industry that loses billions of dollars in revenue in two days, will make it up
three or four days later. We’re talking
fuckin billions here! But, it’s the
insurance companies that really piss me off.
They bring on as many paying customers as possible, with the knowledge
that if a major tragedy occurs, they can’t pay off on all of the claims at
once. Then they plead for federal
assistance, and get it?! So the policy
holders are paid with the their own tax dollars, and the insurance companies
continue taking on more clients whom they can’t afford to pay. Now let’s just apply this scenario to
everyday US citizens. If we take on an
ass-load of credit cards, and then can’t pay them off, we’re in a world of
serious shit. I wonder what the Fed
would say if I asked them for $500 to pay off my Visa because I over spent last
month?
As I said, I’m just asking some questions… none of which I can claim to
have any reasonable answers for at present, but it does make you kind of
wonder, yes? Maybe Kennedy’s assassins got together with big brother and the
dead aliens and forced the CIA into a secret deal with Libyan sheep herders in
an effort to convert our country into a space port for the exiled creatures
from Uranus. You never know…
-Woody