Agent Gryzlikoff walked by the surveillance office at SHUSH HQ.

"Ah Agent Double N. Tondera. Good to see you back at SHUSH, I was afraid FOWL was paying you better. Da comrade? How nice to see you again."

"Agent Gryzlikoff." The agent nodded.

As is the case of most superior officers he had no idea what was going on.

"Vat are we looking at?"

"This is the interior of Steelbeak’s car."

"Two cameras. Any pertinent information today?"

"Not if taking his girlfriend to the mall can be considered pertinent."

"Ah."

The tape showed the interior of a very elegant convertible, from the seat belt level in the passenger seat. Sheepskin seat covers the whole works.

Agent N. Tondera spoke over the silence.

"Steelbeak’s car is the latest in SHUSH technology, voice activated, remote control activated with special cufflinks. We added these cameras into his car undetected the last time he got it waxed."

"Here is what happened at noon."
The agent fast-forwarded the tape. A mask figure sneaks into the car and places a black box on top of the camera.

Agent Gryzlikoff nodded.

"Is that who I think it is?"

"It’s probably Gingko Biloba

Gryzlikoff scowled " I know who the Gingko Biloba is. It is a shame she is so incompetent or we wouldn’t have to be here watching you sorry attempts at home movies, eh comrade?"

SHUSH had been watching Annie Pedicure for some time now. It is evident that she is not a higher level deep cover from the DIA. The current theory she is the cover for the YAK-u-saw, a Japanese splinter group of the Evil Kungfoo Baboons. But she didn’t possess speak Chinese or Japanese. They still had no idea who sent Gingko Biloba to kill Steelbeak. Who knows? Maybe it really was personal vendetta as she claimed.

"We have another view of the car."

It was seen from about the level of his seat belt. He enters the car. They could see him from the chest down

Agent Tondera laughed. "I love job)

"Here is our cam in the parking garage." Agent N Tondera announced.

The dinky Japanese car figure here the short Canid Brunette with red eye shadow and small pink eyes and really long nails turns around and stares at him. Annie Pedicure his personal secretary, the fake fake identity of Gingko Biloba. None of the SHUSH double agents were able to get so close to Steelbeak so quickly.

Agent Double N Tondera stopped the footage.

"Could you follow her. Maybe we can’t crack Steelbeak but maybe we can learn something from her."

Agent N Tondera restarted the tape, pointed the cameras at Gingko.

All at once there was a huge flash of light, it nearly blinded Gryzlikoff and Tondera. They looked at the screen. There was nothing but snow.

The car vanishes end of footage.,

Gryzlikoff asked "Vat happened?"

"Um." The Agent sighed

"Did he find the camera while dealing vit de car bomb and dismantled it."

"No there would have been an alarm, if the device had been deactivated."

"Did the recording device go out of range of the feed?"

"It doesn’t have a- This is impossible."

"Agent N Tondera where in Helsinki did dat rooster go?" Agent Gryzlikoff grabbed his inferior by the shoulders.

"I don’t…know."

It had all began so innocently enough. He had spent the morning working to coordinate FOWL's newest telemarketing scam, nice lunch, Gingko trying to blow up his office, but he was ready to go to Serena's house for the weekend. And he was ready to go to visit Serena’s house.

Hey he didn’t expect to find such a great bomb in his chair. He knew some guys who worked in demolitions, maybe they could deactivate it for him, he figured. Ricky owed him a favor.

He crammed it in his glove department.

Steelbeak must have thrown it funny, as something there was a strange noise.

Oh S$%$

It must have some pressure sensitive trigger. He braced for explosion.

There was a huge green flash of light. And then nothing. The same road, the same buildings. Wow this thing was a dud. He placed it in the glove compartment and drove back into his office building, to make sure.

Even though Steelbeak didn’t see the world outside of his car, he knew instinctively that he had drove into the wrong parking lot.

He held up his hands, and sighed

"I hate dis part."

He scanned the situation. Strange Egg men. They weren’t in the yellow. In fact he was sure they weren’t Egg Men. Red square helmets, now that was just not stylish and distinctive enough.

Just then a huge bear was behind him. He turned around. The bear looked like Agent Gryzlikoff. If it weren’t for the lack of a bad accent and worse blue suit, he could have sworn it was Agent Gryzlikoff. Yeah get rid of the glowing yellow eye, the vacant dead look in his face and the big metal hand that was wrapping around Steelbeak’s collar, yeah he looked exactly like Gryzlikoff.

The Bear opened his mouth and a strange voice came out. So small and snooty and British. If there was one thing he couldn’t dig was a guy with a British accent.

"Agent Double 003, trying something different today. I must admit I hardly recognized you in that period piece. Reminds me of the good old days of Espionage. Though I do not know how you lost your …"evil chuckle "little souvenir. One would think it was real." His dead snout was looking at his right eye.

"Yeah well, not many people can afford Armani." Steelbeak dusted his lapels which were in serious danger of ripping as the bear borg lifted him in the air.

"I see FOWL has been working on prosthetics. One can barely notice the seams in your Handtool anymore. Dispose of it GryzliCop "

The other hand turned into a buzz saw. Steelbeak gulped

"No thanks Gryz, I’m not in the mood for a haircut."

The tinny voice that was not Gryzlikoff began to laugh

"Oh Double 003, I must admit, this is an uncharacteristic show of bravado. What’s the matter, run out of lollipops?"

Steelbeak had no idea what he was talking about.

"Cut off his hand tool and send it to R&D."

"Hey, I just had a manicure." The buzz saw got perilously close to his wrist.

"Then take him to the interrogation room. We’ll see if this bravado continues once we get the lasers out."

Steelbeak closed his eyes.

He heard a grappling hook. And he fell into the back driver’s seat, and a spatter of something against his cheek. He hoped it wasn’t his blood. He crouched down even further.

Life had taught Steelbeak some important things. And one of them was keep your eyes closed and your head down, if you don’t know what’s going on. It might be interesting and informative to see what was happening. But it also probably meant you were lined up in someone’s bull's-eye, or some alien was about to suck out your brain. The reason why Steelbeak had escaped so many dangerous situations cause he always kept his head down at the right time. If you didn’t see it, it’s not important.

"Hey, smooth move." He heard his voice say.

He couldn’t begin to think why he was thinking that.

"Get up, ya joik."

He didn’t open his eyes. He just stood up.

"All right what are ya doing here?" Come on, Didn’t I tell you to keep away from dese SHUSH Monkeys."

Maybe he was hearing it. But how could he hear his own voice, and why would he answer back.

He opened his eyes.

The bear borg had been impaled through the head with a thin grappling hook through his eye, and lay over the hood of the car. The guards were struggling on the ground and some were actually running away. He hoped that it was because they were scared of him. But doubted it.

Steelbeak’s eyes finally readjusted to the light to reveal, himself.

Steelbeak couldn’t think of anything to say. He couldn’t think. The other steel beaked rooster was wearing a great pair of sunglasses, but his comb looked ragged and mooshed down.

"I think ya should start talking." The other Steelbeak was pointing his hand in his face.

Steelbeak was content to just mutter and stammer but then he saw some of the bodies move.

"Hey Steelbeak, the guard’s is getting away."

"Hang back a moment, Joiky." The other Steelbeak shoved him back into the car and pointed his hand at the horizon. A huge blast came from his hand and knocked him into the back seat. The blast hit all three guards much worse however. The other Steelbeak sighed and sunk back into the back seat next to Steelbeak. This other steel beak was ragged, in one of them black shirts that only look good on guys with muscles and suspenders. But Steelbeak had to give the guy credit for wasting the entire group of goons.

The other one felt the top of his head and let out an explicative Steelbeak hadn’t heard in a while.

"The SHUSH monkeys got my hat." And fell back into a round of panting and groaning.

Steelbeak touched his shoulder "Forget about it. It’ll just give you hat comb." He slicked back his comb, wiped the crud out of his eye and loosened his tie and checked the rear view mirror. His comb looked good, but his suit was ruined. Oh well.

He felt obligated to say something to the other one "That was a good shot, Tough Guy"

"Thenk kyuu" he said taking a little obnoxious bow "Joik."

"If these are anything like the SHUSH monkeys I know, they’ll be coming back with dates. Let book it."

"Where’d you steal a franker this nice? It looks like a real car." The other Steelbeak rubbed the seat.

"Hey, this is Countess. She’s my baby." Steelbeak said. Straightening the mirror to drive.

"They don’t even make real cars in Canard."

"Ya from St. Canard, too?"

"Yeah that’s what they used ta call it. Now you might as well call it Heck. Except I’m sure the devil has better catering."

"So let’s roll."

"Hey listen Suit breath. You realize you are aiding and abetting an agent of FOWL," he moved up to the front seat. "Making you fair game to SHUSH, the police and any attendants of the State of Canardberg."

"Hey, pal. I am an agent of FOWL. And I’m not going to let me get iced by some SHUSH monkeys just because." Steelbeak said.

"Hey it’s your funeral."

He gunned the engine. They sped off down the street.

"Name’s Derek Boo." Put his hand out in a gesture of friendship

Without even thinking Steelbeak gave him daps

"Huh?"

"What huh?"

"Nothing."

"What?"

"You just still call yourself Derek."

He chuckled, "I don’t spend much time talking to myself. That’s what I let people call me."

"Steelbeak."

"You let people call ya that. Listen I wouldn’t let no-"

A scrapped car full of teenage girls drove by. To which Derek and Steelbeak whistled. Steelbeak honked the horn twice.

"Hi Derek." One of them leaned through the non-existent left windshield, taped on.

"Hey um Lucy right."

"You remembered."

"Hey Babe I never forget a lady."

She swooned.

"Don’t fall out of the car then, Babe." Derek chuckled.

"You’ll call on me. I’ll be over at The old city park at 10 o’clock."

"I don’t know." Derek blushed. This guy was liquid nitrogen with the ladies. They didn’t even look at Steelbeak

"Who’s that? Your brother? He Chichi, Derek’s got a brother."

"Great you can go out with him Lucy."

"Me? Oh no I’m going out with Derek."

"I am."

"I am." They began arguing.

"Ladies calm down." Derek said soothingly

"This…this is …Valentino." Derek punched him in the shoulders

"Hey Val, where’d you steal the franker?" she shouted at staring the car.

"I have connections Toots."

"I have a friend for your brother too. She’s really cute. See you tonight."

The girls turned off.

They off into the ruined skyscrapers, the fallen arches, garbage everywhere, dark, pollution clouds.

"Who knew that babes went so wild in the Apocalypse?"

"You finally noticed the décor. Early Armageddon, I’d say."

"Hey but you got to admit. Countess is a nice car and I was a little preoccupied. when Someone tried to blow her and me up." He shifted into another gear "I’ve always gotten I get a little distracted when someone tries to kill me."

"Some One." Derek Boo spat and chuckled. "Come by the end of the day you’ll wish it was one."

Derek rubbed his real hand against the sheepskin seats covers.

"It’s so fast too. The Jackers don’t get up this speed."

"Hmm."

"Yeah you are one lucky son of a-"

Just when they were finally beginning to talk about something important, his convertible, Derek cut himself off and swore.

He didn’t even look behind him. "SHUSH is behind us."

"Where?"

"I see them, they commandeered possession of that Jacked back."

Derek grabbed his shoulder "Whatever you do don’t look they’ll shoot you between the eyes. Don’t look."

Steelbeak kept his eyes on the bleak green clouded horizon.

"You can’t see them, their signature is strong. They are in that civilian Franker. Look in the Mirror"

"Franker?"

"Franker, Frankenstein mobiles patched together from a hundred old cars, the new ones are jackers."

Steelbeak was desperate to look behind him.

"Trust me. They’re there. Can this thing go any faster?"

"Don’t worry. I can lose em."

Steelbeak floored it, watching for Derek’s signal. Hey, who was he to question too much. It wasn’t his universe. He occasionally glanced at Derek who was constantly grabbing at his right lens of his glasses. He looked at his wrist, it opened up. This was too weird. But he had only said that thirty times in the last four seconds. Evetually would get, old, but that look on Derek’s face only made him want to drive faster.

Derek sat down.

"Get up on the sidewalk, Now." Derek grabbed his shoulder

"Picky Picky." Steelbeak jerked the wheel all the way to the left.

He drove onto the sidewalk. Unlike most times there was no longer the screams of amazement and astonishment. With fewer people in the world, the streets had gotten bigger. The unseen car loomed. Derek could see it, though he couldn’t.

"All right it’s time to see what this car is made of." Derek stood up and took off of his seatbelt. He climbed up to the edge of the window.

"What are ya doing-"

"At my signal, U-turn."

"Come on Derek. What are you up too?"

"Just shut up and do it. Maybe we can get out of this situation alive." Derek smacked him upside the head.

"We are against the walls of these things, how am I going to go without ruining the bumper"

"Just do it."

"Yeeehsh sur." Steelbeak mocked.

They came across the Spire of huge skyscraper.

Now they u-turned back into the road and a car crashed and three lost control.

"One of them has got be SHUSH." Derek said.

They drove past an old man. Derek snatched off his hat.

"I knew it wouldn’t stay gone for long."

"Look a new hat." He waved at the old man "Send the bill to SHUSH interpol."

They came across the ruins of an old suburban neighbor. The wind rattled through broken windows, and doors wapped into walls of broken hinges.

"We’ll be getting to FOWL any second now." There were the signs of decay everywhere on this Earth. "Pull over up by the Downed telephone pole over there.

A rat shrieked and ran out of the road.

"I don’t remember the rats."

"Oh they’re union rats." Rolled his eyes.

They were slowing down in the grimiest place by far. It resembled the old School area. The suburbs really. It was completely trashed. The roads were inaccessible, but the old places where lawns once flourished green, were perfectly suited for driving black brown sludgy and hard.

"I’d hurry if I was youse. This is the heart of Muddlefoot Clan. They said we only had a half an hour to get out of here. And that was only cause we gave them all those guns."

"So I suppose this is the exposition part. Where you tell me who you are? And why you look like me? I mean just to simplify things."

"Well near as I can tell you are me, I mean if I believed in that junk, but not me, because you live in Paradise."

"Paradise?"

"That’s what Agent 2 calls it. ‘Where Darkwing lives on high to watch over his faithful believers and deliver them from the clutches of Negaduck.’ Or Something I never pay attention to all those religious fanatics."

"Darkmeat Dunk? Come on."

"Hey, don’t rag on them. They’ve been here since the beginning, they’ve gone cuckoo. With this Darkwing Duck legend."

"Legend?"

"Yeah some messiah ‘clad all in purple’ who told them they could defeat Negaduck and saved Old Canard. Baloney if you ask me. But hey it keeps them going."

Derek Boo continued "I should have figured it out. I mean those two are always yakking about the multiverse and what not."

"Multiverse? Sounds painful." Steelbeak said.

"Yeah, Sparques told us that there is a world where everything is idealized and perfect. Of course on the same vein, everyone who is decent and good is evil. If we can believe all that bull cookies. You must be me in that place."

The car continued thundering across the blank desert.

"Where Darkwing shall resides, so those of peace and love shall find the shadows heart."

"Wow." These people based all of their beliefs, all of their ideals and virtues came from a champion of justice and righteousness that he himself had battled. Apotheosizing him to the level of a god by sheer virtue of his extraordinary valour and courage. Living by the example he had set.

No wonder the place was so clucked up.

"Well I do know Darkwing Duck very well." Steelbeak stared at Derek. "He’s a obnoxious little joik. But Damgum lucky, let me tell you something."

"Look, I hope you don’t mind if I laugh." Derek rolled his eyes.

"First thing Val. Darkwing doesn’t exist."

Steelbeak chuckled "I wish. I’d be sittin pretty in a few hundred trillion smackers if he didn’t."

Derek wasn’t listening "And second, What would a guy like Darkwing have to do anything with a guy like me? or you? He’s friggin’ Darkwing Duck. The Slayer and Slain of Negaduck. The Messiah, the Son Of God. Gah"

Steelbeak shrugged "I don’t know. He stops me from making stuff for FOWL."

"Darkwing fights FOWL in your dimension?" he asked plainly.

"Yeah."

"Well, now you’ve proven he can’t exist."

"What."

"You’ll have to wait and see."

They slowed the car to a halt. A strange black car, very old, but still in one piece sat. Two figures in black tee shirts were playing jax only with stones and sticks instead of real jax. The two agents laughed.

"Kae"

"Bae"

"BO"

The female agent caught four of them on her hand.

The door opened to reveal a strange and familiar figure. Steelbeak opened his mouth.

Bushroot was wearing sunglasses, and a smartly cut Italian suit.

"Excellent work Agent 3. But you were cutting it close on the pick up. I thought I’d have to leave you to the Muddlefoots." The plant duck said coolly, almost as if he had meant it as a joke.

"No Kiss Goodnight?" Derek frowned.

Bushroot raised his eyebrows once. "Well now we must get back to HQ. Jack needs his report." The mutant plant duck looked unbelievably suave in black. He looked over his shoulder like David Gibbon would, hand in one pocket. "He is completely dead?"

"I put a piston through his brain. That still doesn’t make it any freaking easier." Derek said

"Gryz was dead long before you came along Boo. We can safely hope they don’t make any Necrobots soon. It’s over now. And whatever you do don’t let it get to you. We’ve got a job to do and you can’t let the guilt bring you down." Bushroot said, brushing the ash of the landscape on his coat.

"That’s the difference between you and me Bane. I get worried when I stop feeling guilty."

"Now to the matter at hand." Bushroot pulled down his glasses. "Who in the duck is this?"

"Steelbeak." Derek said.

"Derek, be kind." Bane tsked You should know how horribly embarrassing it is to have a prosthetic b-"

"He’s right. I am Steelbeak. And your Dr. Reginald Bushroot."

The plant duck wasn’t listening.

"The likeness is uncanny." Bushroot stroked his chin with a leaf. Derek jumped between them.

"Like a mirror only stupider." Derek rolled his shoulders.

"Can we be sure, he’s you?" Bushroot said.

"If you believe in Darkwing Duck, you’d have to believe him too." Derek said sarcastically. "And frankly this goomba is not my idea of poifect world."

Bane glared at him. Derek’s constant barrage that Darkwing Duck didn’t exist was almost as annoying as Sparque’s devotion.

"Is there any way we can tell?"

"I don’t have finger prints, we don’t have any DNA testing, or retinal scans."

"Well, can’t take any chances."

Bushroot picked up a gun.

"And if you aren’t Evil Derek, I’m so sorry you had to come here." Bane said, pointing the gun at his face.

Steelbeak’s head reeled. "Hey, you’re the pansy guy. You don’t-."

Derek pointed his hand at Bane.

They three stood in a deadly stalemate.

"We have to be sure first." Derek said coolly.

The plant duck didn’t even flinch at the Handtool pointed at his head.

Bane lifted one eyebrow. "Agent 3, are you aware of the implications of your actions. Big Jack won’t get you out of this one."

"I’m not saying we won’t kill him-"

"Oh thank you Derek." Steelbeak said.

"He did save my life. What if he isn’t me? What if he is someone else?"

"What could that be?" he put down the gun, and used it to comically scratch his bill. "Oh a clone? A new kind of necrobot, a metamorphosizing alien. All really pleasant possibilities. We can forget it all if you put down the gun." It sounded like Bushroot was being sarcastic. Steelbeak was shocked.

"We let Big Jack see, then we decide." Derek said

"We have to act now. If he is from Paradise he is our enemy and we must destroy him."

"We are not like that Bane. I’ve know you for too long to let you be like this. If you draw the line somewhere we are going to become were gonna be just like them, just like SHUSH. Or worse since we don’t got anything we are going to become everything they say we are."

"Well that’s all fine and dandy, Derek. Why do you think we were called to this role? Because it was easy? We have to be tougher than we are supposed to be. We have to buckle down."

"We have to strike them before they strike us. We have to eliminate our opposition." Derek said bitterly. "You sound like one of them now."

Bane got an angry look on his face.

"I’m not going to listen to this Boo, you are upset."

"You are changing into one of them."

"I’ll never be one of them Derek. I have Darkwing on my side. He said we would defeat Negaduck …"

"There you go again, always with your precious Darkwing. It’s like your shield or something." Derek continued pointing his hand "What were they doing when the built the wall around Canardberg. What were they doing when they did this to me-"

Derek threw off his specs, to the ground.

Steelbeak gasped.

Derek didn't have a real eye. It was replaced by a glowing green light, completely metallic.

"Ya like to forget that wouldn’t you, Bane. Ya like to think I’m one of you. That I just can believe all of this garbage about the Great Darkwing. Well I never saw him, and I ain’t neva gonna see him. What were they always doing when they crushed and oppressed us? They knew they were better than us."

Derek eased down his hand "I think this guy deserves a little human doubt."

Bane seemed almost moved by Derek’s words for a second, but soon returned to the stone cold professional he was.

"I’m not going to be responsible for him when Big Jack tries to kill you."

"Don’t worry, this is between me and Jack, Bane."

"Okay. We’ll take him along."

"I’ll guard him in his car."

"A car? Where on earth did you get another working car?" Bane asked stepping into the Franker.

"I’m not sure it is on Earth Bane, I’m not sure it is."

"This is too weird."

Derek was sitting in the car already.

"All right dish, Tough guy, where’d ya get de eye." Steelbeak said

"One of the joys of the upper class Canardbergian male." He placed back on his glasses.

"Free Re-education training. Most of da time, you get a quick bullet in the head, right behind the ears. That ought to get rid of them smarts."

"What did you do to get that? Drugs? Murder?"

"My intelligence level was illegal."

"Intelligence?" Steelbeak asked incredulously.

"If you’re too smart, you can’t comply into the standard educational disk. You’d go insane in Canardberg."

"Canardberg?"

Derek sighed as if he were talking to a three year-old. "The two cities became one and they put this wall up. The high muckety mucks in Duckberg-McDuck, Glomgold, and Beagle, bought up most of St. Canard. It was the only land saved after the neutron bomb landed. All those who live in those lands have to play by their rules."

"Canard…boig? I can’t see that. It’s too… I can’t handle that"

"Lots of people couldn’t handle it. Good thing Canardians are so damn surly and rude, other wise there wouldn’t be old Canard. Most of the inhabitants here don’t even remember Duckberg and St.Canard."

"But you’re different."

"Hey if you call escaping that h*&^hole different yeah."

"Then the beak. What broke it?"

"You’re awful nosey today." Derek laughed.

Steelbeak looked strangely at his counterpart.

"No pun intended."

"Cheap shot with a chain …"

"across the chin." Steelbeak finished holding his beak, sympathetically

"Man those Teachers knew how to brawl." Derek Boo laughed.

"And it wasn’t the same after that." Steelbeak finished "The eye?"

Steelbeak was almost afraid to ask.

"But where did you get the eye?"

"Everyone in the De-Education centers has an eye outlet. It started out as the prospect of a direct interface. The technology never caught up. So the eye is basically useless. A gesture of brutality to dehumanize us. But it didn’t work on me. The best I can do is pick up SHUSH energy signals 500 meters away. I guess it’s not totally useless."

"And the hand?"

"Where else am I going to put my tool?"

"Oh."

"It must be kind of weird. Looking at me with all… this." He held up his strange hand.

"No no…"

"Because it’s really looks weird to see my own eyes."

"Well I can’t say the same.

They drove on to Federation Of World Liberation.

Big Jack used to have long red hair. Now it was balding, under his yarmulke. He used to cover his hair all the time, so that had kept it in excellent condition for his age. It wouldn’t be the biggest sacrifice in the world against Negaduck, but it did age and make him seem as mortal as he couldn’t and keep everyone as confident as they had always did. It was enough to make you put on the motley again...

The whole situation was tense. He so wished he could put on the cuff and collar again. Give up the serious burden of leadership. But with the destruction of the Doll, he couldn’t hide his own voice anymore.

They approached with a strange rooster. Bane had radioed it in.

"Agent 3, 4 come in."

"Can we bring him in too?" Bane said playfully, pointing at the extra rooster. Jack considered the other. It was Derek. Bane had been right. They had a villain in their midst.

"Well well well. Derek. Congratulations you’ve found a new way to give me an ulcer."

Bane was beaming.

"Not a word Bane. This doesn’t really concern you. But to the business at hand. Is the Gryz dead?" Jack sat behind his desk

"Yes."

"Well I hope this is the last time someone has to kill him. I’m frankly sick of losing agents to a guy everyone has taken a shot at." Even Jack had killed GryzliCop at least once.

"If he is dead, they are going to try to create another necrobot. We don’t know who is going to be the next test subject. SHUSH could already be manufacturing them. I want a full report on any unusual activity in morgues, hospitals and cemeteries. They would need a bulk of bodies."

"Perhaps the orphanage again?" Derek Boo suggested. "Or the Standard Re-Education centers."

"No, that was to train the Necrobots. Most Re-education centers only have children. They need adults ones." Jack looked at them "I could beat up a little kid if I wanted to." With a wicked little look in his eye.

He continued "I hope that we aren’t too late. Bane, this is your baby. I don’t want to see you until you can tell me everything, the stats, the numbers, headcount of the dead. I want to know anything and everything."

"Yes Jack." Bane said, heading out, he probably would have loved to see Derek get yelled at. Bane despite his age and powers, usually had the most childish motives and impulses.

Big Jack sat up in his full height all 4 and half feet, on the corner of his desk.

"You want me to pass judgment then."

"I just want to know what you think." Derek said milling around his feet.

"You want me to make your decision, then?"

Derek sighed.

"You should have let Bane do it. Not think about it. Now we have this whole…issue here." Jack retreated to his chair.

"Hey, Bushroot was going to kill me." Steelbeak whined.

"Exactly Clyde." Jack said, the glimmer of his old self behind the old mouth and the anger.

"Now Bane’s not going to do it." Derek said guiltily.

"Oh, who is? Could you really ice yourself Derek?"

"Hey, what?" Steelbeak said "Look no one said anything about-"

Derek furrowed his eyes and pointed his hand tool at Steelbeak.

"Shut up Steelbeak, or so help me Darkwing, I’ll blast your clucking head off!" He yelled at the double. Steelbeak held up his hands.

Derek tried to hold onto this anger pacing through the office.

"What if I hate him? What if I can’t stand his approach to his circumstances? Here he is. We’d have to assume a super villain, but what kind? I’ll bet he sits in a fancy office all day, and spends his nights in some bimbo’s Jacuzzi, getting sick off of champagne while everyone else in the world suffers for his expense account."

"You forgot the three martini lunch." Steelbeak said.

Derek banged his left hand into his stomach. They both recoiled. He was about to pounce on Steelbeak

Big Jack held him back. "You can’t kill yourself. I know you. And trust me, if you wanted to you couldn’t. Not even this."

"Well I thought…"

"You thought wrong. If you can get Megawatt away from temple, maybe he would do it. Why don’t you pay one of your agents to do it?"

"Shut up, Jack" Derek Boo said frustrated.

"Your agents would do anything for you."

"Shut up."

"You knew I couldn’t, this is just another one of your games, Derek."

"You’re the one to talk ‘Big’ Jack. You’ve created this whole game before. Now you are the fearless leader. No more games. You still wear the Motley. You won’t stop playing and I won’t either."

They sat staring at each other for a long time. Jack finally spoke.

"I couldn’t kill him. I’d look at him and melt. I’d change back into the Clown. I feel it. If you would die, I would. You are the only one that keeps me grounded, Derek."

Jack sat back in his chair. They sat in complete silence.

"So what do we do with him." Derek asked.

Jack stroked his aching head "You’re such a tease Boo."