Helter-skelter asked Oopsie-Daisy if she would marry him. These were pet names for each other, based on their quirks. He was always in a hurry, and she was a total klutz. She accepted his proposal, and he, of course, wanted a date set immediately. She was more inclined to wait, allowing her time to make certain that everything went smoothly.
He arrived at the altar in a black tuxedo, but wearing brown wingtip shoes. He was so rushed at the last minute that he remembered that he didn’t have any black shoes. She, despite the incredibly slow-paced Wedding March music, managed to step on the hem of her gown, trip and fall in the center of the aisle. Being somewhat overweight as well as overwrought, she dragged her father, a slight fellow, right down on top of her. The bouquet was crushed, and her veil was askew with the pins undone.
The groom rushed from the altar to her aid. Sitting in a pew next to the sprawled bride, a friend of the family was heard to say, “Well, I never knew what she saw in him, but it looks like she really fell hard.”
© RickMack (jotoma@bellsouth.net)
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