Lucky had come into Kelly's to pick up an order. Liz had heard the order come in, so she took a quick glance in the mirror to check if she looked decent.
She saw him enter the restaurant, and for a second it was like her dream of what would happen when he returned: he would walk in, smile at her, flash those blue eyes, and tell her how much he missed her, how he would never leave again.
Then she really looked into his eyes. She saw a change in them. They used to hold so much confidence, so much strength. She used to be able to spend hours just staring into them. His eyes always held the truth, and that had not really changed. Now his eyes were troubled. They had lost their light.
Liz struggled to reconcile her memories of the Lucky she used to know with the Lucky of today. She had to face it; Lucky was fundamentally changed by his experiences, whatever they were. Somehow she had to reach out to him, show him some things had not changed.
Elizabeth smiled as Lucky approached the counter. "Hi, Lucky," she said sweetly.
Lucky smiled slightly at her. "I'm here to pick up the chili," was all he said.
"It's not ready yet." She saw Lucky look down, shifting foot to foot. "You know, I have a break coming to me, why don't we sit down and talk?"
"I don't know, Elizabeth…" he said weakly.
"Well then, you can sit at the counter, and I'll stay behind here."
Lucky sat heavily on one of the stools. It looked like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders, and it broke Elizabeth's heart.
"How are you, Lucky?" she asked simply.
"Oh, you know, the same."
"Are you feeling any better?"
Lucky sighed. "It's hard to tell what I'm feeling anymore."
Elizabeth held a dishrag that she twisted in her hands. "Maybe I can help you figure it out."
Lucky looked up at Elizabeth with eyes filled with a raw, animal pain. "I- I can't do this, Elizabeth, I can't!" He stood up, backing away.
Elizabeth moved around the counter and touched him on the arm. "Please, Lucky, let me help you!"
"No, Elizabeth, please! Please!" he pleaded, jerking away from her touch.
Tammy entered the dining area. "Liz, Lucky, are you OK?" She looked back and forth at the two pained young people.
"We're fine, Tammy," Liz covered.
"Here's your order, Lucky." Tammy held out a brown paper bag.
Lucky pulled out a few crumpled bills from his pocket and gave them to Tammy. He took the bag. "Thanks," he whispered. He looked at Elizabeth, and their gaze locked. It was then she realized what she saw in his eyes: pure desperation.
Liz sighed as she looked down at her work again. Why wouldn't Lucky let her help him? He had saved her once; all she wanted was to do the same.
Suddenly, Emily came running into the lobby. "Hide me, hide me," she frantically whispered.
Liz thought quickly and got up off the couch. She led Emily into the women's bathroom. "What happened?" she asked, closing the door behind them.
Emily quickly checked the room to make sure they were alone. Then she turned to Liz. "Oh my God, what did I do?" she moaned.
"Well, I won't know until you tell me!"
Emily sighed. "I kissed Sly."
"What?" Elizabeth asked incredulously. "Why would you do that?"
"I just got so mad at him. He had Juan sing this song, and it was so obvious he was trying to tell me that Juan and I were over, which we're not," she rambled.
Elizabeth grabbed Emily by the shoulders. "Emily, focus. Why did you kiss him?"
"I confronted him. I gave him a piece of my mind. I thought that I would end his little crush on me, so I kissed him." Her eyes fell. "I didn't think that I would like it."
Elizabeth sighed. "What are you telling me, Emily?"
"I don't know! I'm so confused!"
"Are you going to tell Juan?"
"No!" Emily said emphatically. "There's no reason to tell him; it didn't mean anything."
"But you just said you liked it."
Emily looked into one of the mirrors. "It doesn't mean I'm going to act on it!"
"Emily, are you sure? It sounds like you're leading them on."
Emily frowned. "Gee, thanks. I thought you were supposed to be my friend."
"What? A friend can't have an honest opinion? You can't have it both ways."
"Can't you see my side of things?"
"Look, I'm sorry. I just can't see hurting someone you love, whether you mean to or not!" Liz started to tear up involuntarily.
Emily paused. "I'm sorry, Liz. I'm being insensitive."
"You have two guys who would do anything for you. I would do anything for Lucky, but he won't give me the time of day. I just don't understand it."
With that, she walked right of the bathroom, and out the front door of L&B.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Laura walked around the kitchen, grateful to have a day off from her job with the outreach program. She sat down at the table with a cup of tea and a good novel. Suddenly, there was a knock at the back door.
She opened the door to find Luke casually leaning against the doorframe. "Hello, angel."
Laura's eyes brightened immediately, and she surprised Luke with an impetuous hug. "Oh, Luke, you're home!"
Luke returned the hug. "Well, aren't you going to let me in?"
"Oh, of course." She moved out of the doorway. Luke walked into the
familiar kitchen.
"Well, I see you grew a beard again."
"All part of the disguise, darlin'," he drawled. He looked around. "Where's Lulu?"
"Out with my mother at the park. I don't know when they'll be back." Laura looked pensively at Luke. "So does this mean that you've been cleared of Stefan's murder?"
"Not yet, but I'm working on it." Luke looked down at the floor. "You know, maybe it's all that time I used to spend with Lucy, but I don't know, I had this strange feeling. Like I should be here or something. Hell, that doesn't even make sense!" He paced bit, then looked up to see Laura's eyes filling with tears. "What's wrong," he said, immediately concerned.
"It's Lucky. Oh God, Luke." She started to sob.
"What? Laura, tell me what's going on."
"After you left, he started getting worse. He completely shut everyone out. Then one night…" She stopped briefly, but the tears did not relent. "He got up on a bridge and tried to kill himself."
Luke staggered just a bit. It felt like someone had just punched him. He stared at Laura in disbelief. "What?" he managed to whisper.
"He got up on the bridge. He was about to jump into the river. Thank God Elizabeth, Emily and Sly found him, and they were able to talk him down. Sly actually got up on the railing with him. I don't know all of the details, but they convinced him not to do it." Laura's body shook with sobs. Luke unconsciously moved to her and held her, partly so that he wouldn't collapse himself.
"And after that?" he said, still holding her.
"They took him to the hospital, and now's in therapy with Kevin Collins."
"So that's why he moved back in." Luke let go of Laura. He grabbed onto the counter to steady himself.
"How did you know that?" Laura questioned.
"I found Lucky and Sly passed out drunk last night at the club. They left this morning, but they didn't give me too many details."
"The doctors didn't want Lucky living alone. So he came home." Laura paced. "They were drinking? I knew I shouldn't have let him stay with Sly last night."
"Apparently, it was the cowboy's idea."
"That's even worse. It's obvious he's looking for an escape." Laura twisted her hands. "I just pray he doesn't go back to the one he tried before."
Luke grabbed one of the mugs lying in the dish dryer and flung it across the room. He watched it shatter. His eyes flashed with disappointment and self-hatred. "We did this to him. We are the ones responsible. Where did we screw it up? Did we become so arrogant that we thought we were actually raising him right?" Laura said nothing. "He must have gotten the message somewhere, Laura. That it was alright just to- give up!" He looked her in the eyes. "When you sow the wind, you reap the whirlwind. We're just harvesting what we planted. Now he's paying the price for our mistakes."
Laura's eyes were downcast. "Luke, I'm not denying we made mistakes. We made more than our share. But we weren't there last year. We don't know what happened to Lucky. He's obviously struggling with his memories, Luke. Sometimes it seems like he's going to collapse under their weight." She wiped a tear from her cheek. "But we're here now. We'll do whatever we have to, to get through to him."
Luke frowned. "Just plow ahead, consequences be damned? Oh honey, that's just our problem. We can't keep turning to the same solutions. The song's getting old."
He moved to the door. "I- I have to go now. I'll be in touch." He quickly exited the home. He walked as fast as he could into the woods. The branches and twigs tore at his skin. When he was far enough into the forest, he stopped. He leaned against a tree. "Oh, Lucky," he whispered. "What have we done?"
Laura had let Luke go, but then she had second thoughts. She ran to the door. "Luke! Luke!" she called. She looked around; he was gone. She whispered to herself. "What if… I need you?"