The Pit of Despair
HYPERBOLE ALERT!!!
You have just reached the greatest and
most important page on the Internet. Not only is it the
greatest page now, but nothing from the past compares to it,
and leading scientists question whether mankind is capable of
surpassing it in the foreseeable future. Other web
designers have been known to quit their jobs immediately upon
viewing this page, knowing that nothing they have done or will
ever do can possibly hope to equal this, the single greatest
endeavor in the history of mankind. I don’t want to
oversell it though, so check it out for yourself.
Now, I know what you’re saying.
You’re saying, “Chris, my socks have been
blown off, and now my feet are getting cold. It is
evident even to one such as I that you have created something
beautiful. But what exactly can find at this Mecca, this
Shangri-La, this shining beacon of all that is good and right
in a world of infidels and debauchery? Pray tell.”
Your question is a valid one, my
impetuous friend. Listed below with helpful illustrations
are some of what you can expect to find. Clicking on the
photos will open up a whole new world of unparalleled bliss.
Fine literature
Anthropomorphic veggies
Me (actual photo)
Web links
Stuff I worked hard on
Above: My Irish ancestors circa 1855
Magee family genealogy
Despite the appearance of the icon, this
is actual a serious page. Nothing funny on it, besides
maybe some people’s names. Hattie? What kind
of name is that?
More random pictures
Now, perhaps you’re thinking
“Everything here is better than sex, but I’m the
kind of person who’s always wanting more. Never
satisfied. Just keep taking and taking, never giving
back. Leeching off the rest of humanity like... well, a
leech. What else you got?”
Question ME, will you? Very well.
I ask you this: How many other sites on the web can offer
you a Sprinkle Genie AND a Scottish polar bear? Not many,
because I’ve looked. Oh God, how I’ve looked.
This page was created using voodoo and
ritual sacrifice. Each photo cost me one chicken, so I hope you
appreciate them.
You can always contact me at
hiddendragon02@hotmail.com, or just look out your window,
because I’m usually hiding in the bushes.
Last updated October 28, 2007.
