February, 26, 2003
HTML
--I know what you all are thinking ("you all" referring to the readers of my webpage, which of course could be just be Keith, keIth, and KEitH for all I know).  You're saying to yourself, "Gosh Keith, you talk a good talk, but hey come on, this website of yours is pretty bare bones.  Where's the Flash animations, the streaming media, the mouse-over menus, the online store to buy autographed pictures of you?!".  Point well taken.  My website is really bland and dry concering "features".  The reason being, I'm not a web guy, despite my best efforts to fool you.  I have little to no knowledge (I'm working on my pride, have patience) of HTML {Hyper Text Markup Language}.  I have little to no knowledge of Java "the Hut"  based code and I've forgotten much of my limited exposure to C++ (no thanks to Virginia Tech's sorry engineering computer science curriculum).   Anyways, I'm admitting my limited cereberal resources concerning web page development.  I desire to learn and put newfound knowledge to work in the near future, but as for now, you're going to have to deal with my slim aesthetic website offerings.  In terms of content, I believe I deliver.  I just know I'm behind a little in how that content is delivered.  My bad and sorry.

February, 26, 2003
Webcam
--I got my webcam up and running now.  Just part of my website's ongoing upgrading.  Although its not directly integrated into my website yet, it's functional from my computer.  You'll have to IM though for it to work Click to IM me .  If I'm there, and you're nice, I may just turn it on for you, live stream and all :)

February, 26, 2003
Rebuttals, Thoughts, Comments
 
--EbbWorld will soon reach 2000 hits in the near future in its approximately 1.5 years? of being live.  It's been a labor of love, as I hope you can tell.  Unfortunately I'm still with Yahoo and have yet to acquire my own domain and URL (Uniform Resource Locator).  I'm hoping in the future that will be different.  As good as Yahoo has been to me, it would be nice to have more than 15MB of space and it would be cool to have www.ebb-world.com live (www.ebbworld.com is already taken....Drat!).  Anyways, back to my point.  I have received some emails, IM's, compliments/concerns, etc. concerning the state of my website over time, but I guess I was just thinking there'd be more (I hope more people read my site than I think, and I know less people read my site than I think.....yes I said what you read, it makes perfect sense....read it again).  Anyways, I know I write about some touchy stuff.  I don't regret or apologize for anything I say here, but I would like to hear what people think.  I know some of my stuff pisses people off.  I know it annoys people.  And I know some people agree with a lot I say.  But let me know what you think.  I respect everyone's opinion and I desire to learn more and more about where people are coming from.  I might not agree with you, but it helps me to understand.  I'm even hoping to do a sort of "Dear Abby"-type forum in the future where I can respond to peoples' questions, comments, and rebuttals.  I think it would enhance things.  I don't want to feel so "one-sided" all the time.  Again, my stance is firm on most things (not all), but I like to know how other people feel.  And please don't confuse "being open" with a "relative mind".  A relative open mind has no absolutes, no firm stance; nothing is taboo, everything is permissible.  I could write a whole article on the differences (and maybe I will sometime), but not now.  Anyways, like I say, if you feel so inclined, please let me know how you feel or of any questions you have.  My contact information is on my mainpage.  Thanks :)

"You wanted to know why I'm different, why I refuse to open my mind?
Because that relative stance is inadequate, to fulfill what I need inside."
-song 'Pipe Dream' by Project 86

February, 25, 2003
Castlevania for PS2
   --
Well Konami has finally officially confirmed the development of a new Castlevania game for the Playstation 2 (article here)!  Oh happy day!   ....sorry I couldn't resist, my nerdness/coolness knows no bounds.

February, 25, 2003
Better
  --
I'm feeling better.  It's hard to explain, so I won't try to, especially to the random public internet domains of the world.  Sometimes when I write on here, I feel like it's just me that's going to read it.  I fail to realize internet cafes in Singapore, Singapore can see this page too.  Oh well, I have nothing to hide.
The lyrics to the song below comfort me, but everytime I sing the song in a group or just play it by myself (here's the
tablature), I want to cry.  A joyous cry though.  But how can it be?  No matter what I do, I deserve eternal perdition as my final resting place......though how can it be that there is hope...how can it be........just amazing...

"I'm forgiven, because You were forsaken
I'm accepted, You were condemned
I'm alive and well, Your Spirit is within me
Because you died and rose again

Amazing love, how can it be
That You my king would die for me?
Amazing love, I know it's true
And It's my joy to honor You
In all I do I honor You"


February, 23, 2003
Updates
  --
Don't expect any updates in the near future.  Maybe I'll squeak one in, but my mind is too occupied with one thing and I can't freakin break free of it.  I feel like a computer with too little RAM.  Like butter scraped over too much bread.  I don't know how or why I got so involved with this, nothing like ever before.  But it just seemed to happen.  I can't write when I'm not motivated to.  EbbWorld has had an earthquake and its trying to rebuild.  The aftershocks keep coming though...what is wrong with me...where is my trust...

"That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:10

February, 21, 2003
Joy vs. Happiness
  --
Just to clarify the two because I think many people like to mesh them together as the same thing.  "Are you happy?" is not equivalent to "Are you joyful?".  In the most basic of approaches, the main difference between having "happiness" and having "joy", is that happiness is based on temporal circumstances as where joy is not based on the temporary, but more of an ethereal substance, not bound by the 4th dimension (time, for all you slackers that slept through physics class {length: being the 1st dimension, width: being the 2nd dimension, and depth: being the 3rd dimension, hence "3-D".}).  Anyways, it irks me to no end when people take not having happiness for not having joy, or vice versa.  They don't go hand in hand and you can have one without the other, or you can have none at all.  You even could have both together.  Personally, my joy is what we call "unconditional", it does not waver depending on my circumstances or state of being.  From the moment of salvation till the end of time, my joy remains constant, unquantifiable, and graciously illogical.  Happiness is another story.  The dictionary describes it as "emotions experienced when in a state of well-being".  The key words being "emotions" and "state of well-being".  Basically characterized by a state of "good fortune, luck, or blessedness".  We all have times where "happiness" occurs in our lives (getting married, getting an A, getting a puppy, for example), and we all have times where it is not readily occurring (breaking up, getting an F, getting a flat tire, for example).  Therefore "happiness" is based on the here-and-now, our current circumstances.  So times when I may not be happy, I remain joyful.  Do not assume unhappiness equates to unjoyfulness.  And  do not also assume happiness equates to joy; unfortunately happiness without joy is usually the case concerning our humanity (another story).  In conclusion, you must realize happiness is dependent on our current circumstances and emotions based on them, and it can change at the drop of a hat and it holds no gaurantees.  Yet happiness does not control one's joy, though it can; joy is based on something constant and eternal, it cannot change from the moment of true inception.  Recall the hymn "Joy to the World", and you will realize what I'm saying, that "joy" to the world they are talking about will never change or go away.  This world contains many trials and tribulations, so happiness should be hard to come by (count yourself graciously blessed if you receive it), but joy, oh sweet joy, not even the powers of Hell can take that away. 

"Yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will joy in the God of my salvation." Habakkuk 3:18

February, 20, 2003
Diet Drinks
  -
I've been drinking a lot of diet sodas lately (don't ask, I can't believe it either) and I'd thought I'd convey my thoughts on them.  First of all, despite the unprecedented wonderfulness of Mountain Dew and it's sister product Mountain Dew Code Red, Diet Mountain Dew tastes like sewage sludge from a sump that's less dense than actual sewage sludge.  I won't even go into how bad it is, along with Diet Sprite, Diet Sunkist, and Diet Slice, and Skim Milk.  I'm thoroughly dissapointed in Pepsi-Co.'s attempts to make their diet drinks taste good.  They suck.  I do commend Coca-Cola company though for providing a surprisingly good diet drink lineup.  Starting with Diet Coke, which actually tastes pretty good (can't believe I'm saying this).  Other standouts include Diet Dr. Pepper and Diet Vanilla Coke.  These products almost, and I emphasize almost, make me forget I'm drinking a diet drink.  But the product that takes the cake, and actually does cause me to forget I'm drinking a diet drink, is Diet Cherry Coke.  Amazing, I don't know how they do it.  Coca-Cola's chemists must be making six figures.  And while no diet drink will utlimately replace my feelings for drinks like MD, MDCR, regular Coke, Vanilla Coke, Crystal Pepsi, and the such.....I do now find them as fat-preventing alternatives (no wonder beer drinkers have weight problems, it's like 3.5 million calories per can).  Anyways, drinking 6 cans of Mountain Dew a day back in college was o.k. cause of my metabolic rates back then, but unless I wanna end up like Jared (good idea, take advantage of the unsuspecting public by gaining tons of weight and then losing it and becoming an instant celebrity, smart guy that Jared), I'm gonna be mindful of what I drink now....sometimes.  *I don't think I've ever drank a can of Tab.  ** Diet drinks make me pee a lot.

February, 19, 2003
Fate
  -
Just an observation today about fate and/or destiny.  Case in point; I was informed this morning about a local ad concerning the sale of a really super cool arcade game for really super cheap.  The ad was posted online Sunday morning, I became aware of it Wed. morning.  I quickly informed the seller of my intriging interest, and waited impatiently for a response.  I knew for sure someone had probably already snatched up the "to good to be true" deal.  But something inside me also fueled my improbable hope that maybe, just maybe, no one had inquired about it yet.  I didn't let my hopes get to high though, I can't stand a broken heart, mine or others'.  Sure enough, someone did indeed already make a deal to take it off the seller's hands.  But.....yes but....the seller indicated to me that the deal had yet to be committed, and that he would inform me if it fell through.  That "hope of no avail" surfaced again inside me and will prolly stay there until I get confirmation either way.  I will not get my hopes up though, cause chances are even more slim now, but I accept the circumstances willingly and will not totally extinguish the hope that there still may be a chance, no matter how small.  Which reminds me of the first girl I ever asked out.  I was 18 and 5 months old (yes I was a late bloomer realizing that girls are indeed good, very good in fact) when I asked her.  I still to this day can't fathom how I got the courage to talk to her in the first place, let alone ask her out to the Prom, but that's beside the point.  Anyways, she graciously declined (for complicated reasons concerning teenage politics, but we won't go into that either).  Did my world come crashing down like a raging fireball careening towards a helpless Earth?  No, it didn't.  Because I knew fully well going into "the asking" that "no thanks" could be a possibility.  And I realized that whatever her decision, it was beyond my control, and that I should leave those matters up to a higher power and keep my head on my shoulders.   And I did.  Was I dissapointed?  Sure, and I even felt a little insecure about it.  But I didn't get all bent out of shape because I was rejected.  Life did indeed go on.  To make a long story short (and for reasons I'm still not entirely sure of yet) I received a phone call a day later from the same girl.  She reassured me that she really did want to go to the Prom with me and at the time I asked her, she was under false impressions concerning my relational status with other girls (whoa, never thought I'd say something so....so teenage political-ish).  And yes it had a happy ending (.....sigh....), and it turned out to be a wonderful night (thank-you Toyota Supra!, yes the same car Paul Walker drove in 'The Fast and the Furious')  Which brings me back to the video game machine for sale.  Whatever happens will happen, and it will prolly be for the best.  So there's no use worrying about tomorrow or arcade machines for sale or war, for tomorrow has enough worries already.  Just take things as they come, and realize that there is a higher power at work, one that really knows what its doing.  Fate is not in our hands, but His.  Comforting actually.

February, 19, 2003
Snow Days
 
-It hit me today that, in the last 14 months, I've only been away from work at the most 2 days(including the weekend, bringing the total to 4 days away from work).  These past 2 snow days (well President's Day was a holiday anyways) were a long time for me.  I took 2 days off going into the weekend this past summer.  That was my only other extended vacation.  Now, don't get me wrong.  I'm not a workaholic or anything.  It's 9 to 5 or bust for me.  I won't usually work overtime or on weekends if at all possible.  It's just I guess in the past 14 months, I've had no "need" or opportunity to take an extended vacation or leave.  So I figure I might as well go into work and make some dough.  You do get used to it though, and I can see how people become "workaholics".  I don't think I'll ever become one (I'm Ebb remember), but I can now definitely see the temptation of money.  Kinda like this One Ring I know about....

February, 12, 2003

Feelings
-I'm learning things everyday.  About myself, about the world, and about the people around me.  One thing I've learned as of late is that feelings and emotions aren't necessarily bad.  Not that I ever thought they were, but I firmly believed, still do that being reckeless with those feelings and emotions are a bad thing.  The mind, body, and spirit work as one, so if someone were to only go into something with just the spirit (feelings and emotions), they'd go in blindly, and unfortunately, foolishly.  Without too much analysis, I just wanted to say that expressing how you feel isn't a bad thing either.  But with saying that, don't try to tell me things like "
well if we love eachother, it's ok to have sex with eachother" (and somehow that justifies sinning??? come on)....that's the most foolish, selfishly lustful statement I've ever heard.   If you love eachother, you'll wait, case closed amigo.   But that's for another forum.  Sorry for the tangent.   As I was saying, there's something about expressing your feelings and emotions to someone in a controlled manner, keeping your mind, body, and spirit in check.  It can be very freeing.  Sort of how telling the truth, whether the consequences are good or bad, can be very freeing to your spirit.  So I apologize for admonishing or even condeming induviduals for being openly "emotional" in the past.  They're on to something I'm seeing.  And while it can bring about potential rif-raff, if it's held in check, the consequences usually probably are good.  Not to mention a good nights rest :)  Just thought I'd throw this stuff out.  Kinda ironic it's my first "Random Thoughts" entry.   Oh well.

February, 12, 2003
War
-My political stance is very clear, I'm a republican (I like babies, they're cute, so sue me), my stance on war is somewhat vocal, but usually it's jumbled.  Statements like "
Bomb'em back to the Stone Age" or "Just Nuke'em" may come off as a little totalitarianistic.....sorry.  I have no right to exercise that right just because I have a gun and someone else doesn't.  Anyways, concerning the current situation with Iraq, war looks like a solution.  Maybe not the only solution per se, but it's a solution.  Ideally, Huessin would opt for exhile and be done with himself, but we all know that won't happen.  Unfortuantely in life, some things don't change.  We all know people, that even despite huge pressures and inclinations, won't change, be it something specific or just general.  We're all stubborn arses and you know it.  Some are just more stubborn than others.  I don't believe Huessin is a man that will have a peaceful change of heart (although not impossible, but very slim chance).  I think he'll die fighting; tis the way of the prideful generals.  That being said, war seems like the only way to rid Iraq, and the world, of the ever dangerous Huessin regime.  What happens after that, who knows.  Will what happens after that be worse than Huessin in power?  Again, who knows, but I think the probablity of the answer to that question being "no" is much higher than "yes".  I guess I subscribe to the belief that "it's better to be safe than sorry".  Though I do get kinda annoyed at people that suggest that war is not indeed a solution, because it is.  Some people have to get it through their thick skulls that the world will never live in peace.  There will always be a madman somewhere, a totalitarian regime somewhere, and a just simple men somewhere.  Unfortuantely the heart of man is incurably wicked, and also unfortuantely, until blunt divine intervention takes place, man will never ultlimately live in harmony.  Accept the truth yo's.   Haven't you all seen 'The Lord of the Rings'???  The lure of the ring lurks inside every man, women, and child.  Fourtuantely though, there are some (the free peoples of the world) that recognize this disease of the soul and fight to keep it back, back contained in the depths of Barad-dur.  The U.S.A. is one of the those free peoples and I form an alliance with them fighting for freedom and deliverance, with pen and also with sword.  I stand behind my country and my elected leaders in their decisions to fight evil and attempt to contain it.  Evil will never be completely obliterated by human hands, but it can be contained.  Iraq could use some deliverance, and I'm all for my country fighting for it.

Febuary 14, 2003
Dating Services
  --
I guess I just wasn't as cognitive of them before, but I'm realizing the amount of online dating service advertisements on the web is just obscene.  I mean I'm starting to see them on commercial sites such as weather.com and even msnbc.com!  They're everywhere now.  And even though I was too young to realize they're meaning, the whole dating service business didn't just get big with the advent of the web, it's been around for a long time in newspaper ads, tv ads, etc.  It's kinda like porn I guess, the web didn't create it, but it sure opened it up to a broader audience and made the means to pursue it even easier.  Anyways, it just amazes me how profuse these advertisements and companies are.  And I'd venture an educated guess that sites like match.com and others make a pretty penny, soley off the insecurities of an insecure public.  Without trying to sound so belittling, I realize our society constantly zombinizes(my word courtesy of Resident Evil) the unsuspecting public with constant propaganda concerning relationships and the sort.  Basically belittling anyone that doesn't have a boyfriend or girlfriend as weird, abnormal, and downright sad.  So it's natural for people to become brainwashed into thinking that if they're not in a relationship that there is something wrong with them, or that they're not "attractive" enough. Balderdash! But I won't get into that right now.  It's entirely unnatural to realize your a wonderfully, beautiful child of God himself, special in every way, and that your identity of who you are and your complete fulfillment in life depends on just realizing that.  If relationships were "the answer" (waz up my boy A.I., Go Sixers!), then no one would ever break up or get divorced.  Anyways, back to the dating services....  I just find it almost nefarious of these companies preying upon peoples' weak insecurities, offering them fulfillment and happiness through their services.  How sad is that?  And I know unfortunately many people subscribe to their miscreant ways. 
  From a neautrally religious (
eck, I hate that word) standpoint, sorta, I find it even more vexing that people would utilize these dating services.  By believing in "God", you say indirectly that he is in fact God, the creator and controller of the universe.  The Christian God even goes so far to say that He's in control of every personal matter concerning all creation, even the smallest thing (see Romans 8:28, Luke 12:22-34).  So to take control of your "love life" (ECK, I hate that word even more!) and use a dating service, your basically slapping God in the face and kicking him on the ground by taking control of your "love life" out of his hands and futily trying to put them in your own hands, on your own time, and on your own turf.  Sheesh, how otoise is that!?  Why would anyone want to circumvent God's own perfect timing and plan by implementing a seriously humanly flawed one into the mix?  What I'm trying to say is, if you do in fact subscribe to a God-like figure, and especially the Christian God of the Bible, then you trust that that higher being is in control and that you shouldn't have to worry about anything, even your "love life".  So your a hypocrite (we all are of course) if you "try" to go out and "find" love or try dating services, or go to bars looking for someone, etc.  When you find yourself "looking" you know your out of God's will and in your own literally damned will, aside from grace that is. 
  Anyways, just an observation I had online lately, and just encouragement to anyone that reads this, that you don't really have to worry about your "love life".   It will come when its meant to come.  The Christian's goal isn't to get married, have 3.2 kids, and a house with a white-picket fence.   The Christian's goal is to glorify God.

"You want to make God laugh, tell him your plans."   -anon

Febuary 15, 2003
Weather Predictions
-This is a short rant, but because we're "supposed" to get a lot of snow this weekend in the mid-Atlantic region, I just wanted to say how annoying weatherpeople (not meteorologists) and people and general can get.  "Did you hear we're supposed to get 6 inches?"...."You can expect messy commute tomorrow morning"....."So are we gonna get snow this weekend?".  These are just a few insanely perturbing comments I have to deal with!  Some people are so ignorant and lazy that they totally trust what some guy or girl says because he or she looks at, and makes a prediction, based on the very same weather data and maps that anyone has availible on websites such as weather.com!  So instead of blindly following someone who's looking at the same maps, go check out the Doppler and barometric maps yourself and make your own prediction.  Or at least trust folks like the respected meteorological scientists that represent weather.com and The Weather Channel (they're not perfect, but they're the best the public has).  Don't watch channel 5's, or 6's, or ActionNews 11's, etc. weatherpeople......they're usually wrong.
RT2 RT3 RTSR
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