Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the TV program Battlestar Galactica are the creations of SciFi, RDM, DE and many others and have been used without permission. No copyright infringement is intended by the author. The ideas expressed in this story are copyrighted by the author.

Life

by Silwyna

Chapter 1

With tears in my eyes I watch them standing at their father’s grave. Both look so much like him. They have their mother’s skin, but their smile – that’s his. I see him in them in every move they make, in their laughter, the way they talk ... There is no doubt they’re his children, even his grandchildren look like him.

I wish they would smile now ... I would give everything to see that smile again. But today is not a day for smiles. Today is his funeral. Three days ago Admiral Lee Adama died. He went to bed at night and never woke up again. His heart had just stopped. And just like that he was dead. Neither of us had expected to die like this ... peacefully while we’re sleeping. We hadn’t even expected to get old enough to worry about gray hair or wrinkles. We had expected to die in a blaze of glory, fighting the Cylons. But we didn’t. We survived each and every battle with them and we lived to see the end of the war. We found earth and settled down. And we grew old. But we didn’t do any of it together ...

Three days ago Lee’s heart stopped, but the truth was that he died two months ago. The day his wife died, his life ended as well. Of course he did a good job hiding it. He still did his work, he laughed and played with his grandchildren. But the sparkle in his eyes was gone.

I never realized how much he really loved her until it was too late. I always believed he would wait for me. Wait for me to get my life in order. But as it turned out, I hurt him one time too often. I kept pushing him away because I knew that he would always come back to me. But one day he didn’t.

I wasn’t there when it started. But Racetrack told me about it. While the fleet was in chaos and his father was fighting for his life in sickbay, he met with Dee every morning after the briefing. She kept him informed about his father’s condition and the status of the fleet. She was there for him when I wasn’t.

Later I noticed the glances he threw her way. One day I saw them in the gym, Dee lying on top of Lee after a training session. It was only a few seconds, but there had been this tension between them .. the way they looked at each other. But I didn’t see it then. I didn’t want to see it. I never thought it was real.

When they were together on Cloud Nine and I shot him, Dee was the one who saved his life. She was the one he found sitting at his bedside when he woke up for the first time in sickbay. It was her hand he sought. And again Dee helped him when I couldn’t.

I knew they were in a real relationship after that. They spend every free minute together. I knew they were close ... but I still didn’t think it was real. I just thought they both needed someone for the moment. I never thought they would stay together forever.

But they did. And ironically the day I realized that was the day Lee told me he would marry her.

***************************************************************************************

I watched Anders lying on the ground when Lee came to me, two bottles of ambrosia in his hands.

“I bring offerings.” He said as he handed me the drink.

“Just in time. I was running on bingo fuel.” I replied grinning.

“Wow look at that!” Laughing Lee pointed at the sleeping form of Anders. “You literally drank Anders under the table.”

I chuckled. “Where's Dee?”

“Oh she uh, packed it in ... to go pack.”

I couldn’t help but laugh with Lee about his attempt to joke. He’s just too cute when he’s drunk. I think that was the moment I realized for the first time what I really felt for him. And suddenly I didn’t feel scared to admit it.

“Guess it's just you and me then.” I said thoughtfully.

“Yup, it's just you and me.” He laughed again.

I always loved to hear his laughter. And when I looked at him, I was convinced I was ready. Ready to stay with him, without pushing him away afterwards. Without hurting him.

“Why don’t we go for a walk?” He suggested.

I agreed and I thought this might be the perfect opportunity. We walked for a while and looked at our surroundings.

“I can’t believe they built all this up in such a short time. It almost looks like a town. A small town, but still ...” His voice trailed off and he looked thoughtfully at the City of tents several meters behind us.

“Check it out! It's a great place for a house.” I teased him. The truth was that the idea of getting a house with him here, starting a life with him on this planet sounded like the best thing in the world right now. At least for me.

“So you're really gonna give up flying?” The way he asked it sounded as if he could never give it up. But he had. He was a Commander now. And Commanders didn’t fly. So why couldn’t I stop as well?

“Eh, flying’s gonna suck now anyway. Lot's of training, endless CAP's. War's over, so is all the good stuff.” I joked. And I searched for the right words to tell him how I felt ... how I have always felt.

“Give me a tour of the future life of Kara Anders.” Lee said grinning. It was not what I wanted to hear.

“I'm not getting married.” I replied determinedly. At least not to Samuel T. Anders. That’s what I wanted to tell him but he beat me to it.

“I will. Or at least I hope to.” He laughed nervously and I looked at him curiously. I had no idea that the bottom of my world was about to drop out below me with his next words.

“I’m going to propose to Dee.” He smiled and when I looked at him I had never seen him so happy and nervous at the same time. “I even managed to get a ring. Now she just needs to say yes.”

“I ... I’m sure she will.” I stuttered.

“I never thought I would say this, but I want to have a family with her. Can you imagine me as a husband? A father even?” He laughed.

I stayed quiet for a moment and just stared at him. The time seemed to have stopped and I couldn’t breathe. It was now or never. I couldn’t wait any longer. I knew I was ready. I could tell him. And I did.

“Lee ... I love you.”

“Wh-what?” Confused he stared at me.

I still thought I had a chance. I still hadn’t realized that it was too late for us. “I love you. I always have. But I ... I kept pushing you away, I hurt you and I’m sorry. I was always afraid to admit it but I’m not anymore. If ... if you still feel anything for me, then ...”

“Kara ...” He laid his finger on my lips and when I looked in his eyes I knew what he was going to say. And my world collapsed. “You have no idea how long I waited for you to say that.” He spoke in a quiet voice. “I loved you from the first moment I saw you and I wanted to be with you more than anything. And I thought I could wait for you forever. But ... forever just turned out to be too long. If you had told me all this a year ago, I would have been yours in an instant. But then I met Dee and ...” He took a deep breath. “ She’s the absolute opposite from you but I love her with all my heart. She’s the best that ever happened to me and I’m happy. And I want to make her happy. There is no room for anyone else anymore. Not even you.” He looked sad as he spoke. But he was sad for the wrong reason. It hurt more than anything to see pity for me in his eyes.

I swallowed and tried to force down the tears. I didn’t want him to see me crying. “I understand.”

“I’m sorry, Kara.”

“No.” I shook my head. “Don’t be. You have nothing to be sorry for. You’re right ... Forever is just too long. I wish the best for you and Dee.”

Lee returned to Pegasus the same night and I did one of the most stupid things in my life.

When I returned to the City I stormed into our tent and practically threw Anders out of the bed. I had no idea how he had managed to get in there as he had been really out when I had left him, but he was there. And he was still drunk as was I. Which was probably the reason neither of us ever suspected any wrong reasons behind my suggestion.

“Let’s get married.” I told him excitedly.

“What?” Anders stared at me as if I had two heads.

“Let’s get married. I love you, you love me and we already live together. Let’s make it official.”

“You sure?”

“More then anything.” I said and when Anders agreed something inside me died. But I smiled at him happily and when we had found a priest and he asked me I said yes with as much determination as I could muster. And I really thought I was happy. I was Anders’ wife now and when Lee would get married, I wouldn’t be left behind. I wouldn’t be alone.

***************************************************************************************

It didn’t take me long to realize how stupid we both had been at the time. Of course our marriage was doomed from the beginning. Anders and I married for the wrong reasons. I wanted to prove to the world and to me that I hadn’t just lost the most important part of my life and Anders was proud and happy that the big and famous Starbuck was now his wife. He never really knew me. He just knew Starbuck ... Kara Thrace had always been a stranger to him. Anders and I weren’t right for each other. But Dee and Lee ... they were. They loved each other more than life and they stayed together. And they belonged together. I once told Lee that I thought his marriage was a lie as my had been ... but it wasn’t. Dee had given him what I never could ... true happiness and unconditional love.

Dee was what I never could have never been ... she was his life, his heart, the reason he got up every morning. They had two wonderful children, Evan and Sophie, and three adorable grandchildren, Joseph, William and Laura. They had lived a happy, fulfilled live. Of course they had their fights every now and then, but they only grew closer afterwards. They had this perfect, wonderful relationship everyone yearns for. And they grew old together.

And now I’m standing here, looking at his grave. I never thought I would outlive him. I didn’t even got to say goodbye. I have never felt really old, but today I do. Lee had been a part of my life for over 50 years. And even though we never became more than friends, he was everything for me. And now he is gone. He had followed Anastasia into the afterlife. He was with her again.

Chapter 2

It’s a tradition to put as many family pictures on the mantelpiece as possible. Dee had taken this tradition very seriously and as I stand in front of the fireplace I have the life of the Adama family in front of me. There is the picture of Lee and Zak and their mother and the one with their father standing in front of his old viper. I had seen these pictures in the quarters of the Old Man half my life and after his death Lee had taken them. This is a good place for them. Next to them are the pictures of their children. A ten year old Evan looks exactly like Lee at the age. And so do his grandchildren. I can see them playing outside in the garden. Everyone has assembled there after the funeral. It is a warm summer day and no one likes sitting inside today. I remember that Lee had loved to sit under the big oak in his garden, reading a book or watching the children play. I can almost see him there, watching them now too. Gods, I miss him so much.

My eyes fall on the picture of their wedding day, two white roses standing on each side of it. They looked so happy that day ...

*************************************************************************************

“Kara, come on, you look great.” Anders said impatiently. “You didn’t make such a fuss at our wedding.”

“That’s because we got married within one hour and we were both drunk.” I replied snappishly. His attitude had annoyed me all morning. He was in a great mood and looked forward to the festivities. I didn’t. But of course I couldn’t tell him that. He wouldn’t understand. He would ask for a reason. And I couldn’t give him one. So I tried to put up a good facade.

When I stepped into the little chapel on Galactica I saw Lee and Helo already standing at the altar. Helo of all people was Lee’s best man. I had no idea when it had happened, but they had become good friends during the last few months. And Lee looked great in his dress uniform. I had to force myself to not stare at him the whole time.

I didn’t have to force myself to return the smile he threw my way when he saw me. I could never resist his smile. He pointed at the front row and Anders and I took our seats. I had the best place to watch the man I love marrying the woman he loved.

I watched Lee talking quietly to Helo and his father who would hold the ceremony. In a short while he would be married. I thought about stopping it. I wanted to jump up and tell him to give me another chance. I never thought I would ever be so devastated about losing someone but I was. I didn’t care about my pride. I let go of Anders’ hand but in that moment the music started and everyone’s attention turned to the other side of the room. Everyone’s but mine. I still looked at Lee ... I watched him as he watched Dee walking towards him. She was wearing a beautiful white dress and he was so overwhelmed he had tears in his eyes. It was the first time I saw Lee close to tears. I could see he really loved her. He was happy. And I stayed quiet.

When Dee had reached him, their hands entwined and they were both aglow with pure happiness. The Old Man beamed with pride and joy. I wanted to be happy for them.

“We are assembled here today to join this man and this woman in holy marriage.” With tears in my eyes I listened to Adama speaking in his usual quite voice. “Marriage is one of the oldest and most sacred institutions in the eyes of the Gods. It was established in the gardens of Kobol, graced by the presence of Zeus and Hera and is declared in the Scriptures to be honorable before all men and women. By entering into this relation you vow to each other to cherish a mutual esteem and love; to bear with each other's infirmities and weaknesses; to comfort each other in sickness, trouble, and sorrow; in honesty and industry to provide for each other in the things which pertain to the Gods; and to live together as the heirs of the grace of life.”

Smiling Adama nodded to Helo who then pulled out two rings and handed them to Lee and Dee. He waited a moment before he went on and took the time to smile at his son. My heart swell with joy at that sight. Both men had grown apart so far in the past that it seemed as if the rift between them could never be closed again. And now the father was holding the wedding ceremony for the son.

“Lee, do you take Anastasia whom you hold by the hand to be your lawfully wedded wife, and do you covenant to be true to her, to love, cherish, and protect her, in sickness and in health, in poverty or in wealth, until death do you part?”

“I do.” Lee said in a calm voice. There was no trace of doubt in his tone.

“Anastasia, do you take Lee whom you hold by the hand to be your lawfully wedded husband, covenanting to be true to him, to love, cherish, and honor him, in sickness and in health, in poverty or in wealth, until death do you part?”

“I do.”

My heart broke at the intense and loving way both Dee and Lee looked at each other.

“Will you now speak your marriage vow to your wife, Lee?” Adama asked, once again smiling warmly and full of pride at his son.

Lee swallowed and cleared his throat. I could see the tears returning to his eyes as he was speaking, holding Dee’s hand tightly in his. “Anastasia, you are the love of my life. You came into my life at a time when I needed you most, and for that I am eternally thankful. I look forward to sharing the coming years of ups, downs, victories and failures with you and only you. I feel like my heart has grown two sizes since meeting you and will encourage it to grow more with every day I spend with you by my side. I look forward to learning from you more each day of our eternal bond.”

With trembling hands Lee slid the ring over Dee’s finger who in return took his hand.

“My dearest Lee, you are the most unbelievable person I have ever met. You know more about me than I know about myself and have been amazingly wonderful to me since the day we met. You compliment in a way that no other can. Some speak of soul mates, but I believe it was pure chance and for that chance, I am forever grateful. I believe every moment is a learning opportunity, and I look forward to growing old with you while learning along side you, forever and ever as long as we both shall live.”

Several tears were rolling down Dee’s face as she spoke but she didn’t care. With the happiest smile I had ever seen on someone’s face she slid the ring on Lee’s finger. They’re eyes were locked on each other for a long moment and to me it seemed as if in this moment they were all alone in the room. I could feel the tears brimming in my own eyes when I saw the Old Man quickly wiping away a tear from his eyes himself before he started speaking again.

“Your gift to each other for your wedding today has been your wedding rings - which shall always be an outward demonstration of your vows of love and respect.... and a public showing of your commitment to each other. You now have what remains the most honorable title which may exist between a man and a woman - the title of husband and wife. For your first gift as husband and wife, that gift will be a single rose.”

Under the surprised eyes of everyone in the room Adama handed two white roses to Lee and Dee. He never told anyone where he had managed to get these roses, not even me. But it was the most wonderful present. And when he went on speaking I couldn’t stop the tears from falling down my own eyes. I felt touched by his words, I was happy for Lee and sorry for myself at the same time. As Adama spoke I knew I had lost what was always most important to me but at the same time Lee gained something wonderful. And I couldn’t be sad for that. So I was happy. And I was crying.

“In the past, the rose was considered a symbol of love and a single rose always meant only one thing - it meant the words 'I love you'. So it is appropriate that for your first gift - as husband and wife - that gift would be a single rose. Please exchange your first gift as husband and wife.”

Lee and Dee exchanged the roses they were holding while they looked intently at each other. In my eyes, it was the most beautiful moment during the whole ceremony.

“In some ways it seems like you have not done anything at all. Just a moment ago you were holding one small rose ... and now you are holding one small rose. In some ways, a marriage ceremony is like this. In some ways, tomorrow is going to seem no different than yesterday. But in fact today, just now, you both have given and received one of the most valuable and precious gifts of life - one I hope you always remember - the gift of true and abiding love within the devotion of marriage.

Lee and Anastasia, I would ask that wherever you make your home in the future - whether it be a large and elegant home on New Caprica - or a small and graceful one on the Pegasus - that you both pick one very special location for roses. One special location so that on each anniversary of this truly blessed occasion you both may take a rose to that spot both as a recommitment to your marriage - and a recommitment that THIS will be a marriage based upon love.

In every marriage there are times where it is difficult to find the right words. It is easiest to hurt who we most love. It is easiest to be most hurt by who we most love. It might be difficult sometimes to find words to say 'I am sorry' or 'I forgive you'... 'I need you' or 'I am hurting'. If this should happen, if you simply can not find these words, leave a rose at that spot which both of you have selected - for that rose then says what matters most of all and should overpower all other things and all other words. That rose says the words, 'I still love you.' The other should accept this rose for the words which can not be found, and remember the love and hope that you both share today.

Lee and Anastasia, if there is anything you remember of this marriage ceremony, it is that it was love that brought you here today. It is only love which can make it a glorious union, and it is by love which your marriage shall endure.”

He stopped for a moment and smiled warmly at both Lee and Dee.

“And now let me pronounce you to be to each other husband and wife. Whom therefore the Gods have joined together, let no man put asunder.” With the proudest smile I had ever seen on him, Adama turned to the people watching this ceremony. “May I present to you, Anastasia and Lee Adama.” Then he turned back to Lee. “You may kiss the bride now, son.”

And with the happiest smile I had ever seen on him, Lee pulled Dee in his arms and gave her a long, passionate kiss.

When they pulled away from each other, they turned to the guests and everyone went up to congratulate them. Anders looked at me strangely when I fell back. I wasn’t sure if I should step up. What was I supposed to say? But then Lee’s and my eyes locked. It was just a split second before his attention was drawn to the next congratulator. But this split second was enough to convince me that falling back now wasn’t an option. Falling back would mean that our friendship was over. As if it had never existed. But I didn’t want to stop being his friend. So I went to them and I congratulated them. I pulled Lee in a warm embrace.

“I’m happy for you.” I whispered in his ear. “I really am. And I wish the best for the two of you.”

He smiled at me when he replied. “That means a lot to me. Thank you.”

I returned his smile as I always did before I turned to Dee ... to the woman Lee loved. “Congratulations.” I said and then I embraced her too. “Be good to him.” I whispered to her.

“I will.” She replied as quietly and when I looked at her I had no doubt that she would.

I don’t remember much from the party afterwards. I had a lot of ambrosia, that much I do remember. Somehow Anders got me back to the planet where we had moved by then. I woke up the next morning feeling hangover and utterly devastated.

Despite my determination to stay friends with Lee I found that it hurt too much being close to him anymore. So I pushed him away ... again. Only this time I was the only one hurting. I tried to concentrate on my and Anders’ marriage and forget about Lee and Dee and their perfect love. They were on the Pegasus and I on New Caprica. We hardly had any contact at all. Lee called every now and then but when I kept telling him I had no time to talk to him he stopped. And we grew apart.

XXXXXXX

Of course we didn’t stay apart for very long. I should have known that was impossible. We’re Starbuck and Apollo and even if we don’t belong together in love, we do belong together in the air. And after the Cylon occupation of New Caprica I found myself being a pilot again, flying right next to Lee. And we became friends again.

Of course we still had our fights. I said some pretty stupid things to him over the years, mostly when I was drunk. The ambrosia made me forget how happy he was with Dee and I only remembered the pain of being left alone. One of those nights, the night following my own divorce actually, I told him again I loved him. I told him that I didn’t think his marriage with Dee would work ... that it was all a lie. That nearly destroyed our friendship. He didn’t talk to me for weeks except when it was work related. But he forgave me eventually like he always did – although this time I had to thank Dee for it as she had been the one who put an end to our fight by locking us into a storage room for hours ... it took me years to be able to laugh about that experience - and I never said anything like that again. And from that moment we really were nothing but best friends ... at least on the outside. My love for him never changed. But I learned to keep it to myself.

********************************************************************************

I watch the pictures on the mantelpiece and I’m glad I was a part of his life. I was there with him when he became a husband, a father and a grandfather. I was with him the day his father died at the proud age of 81, I was there when he took command of Galactica. I watched him settling down on earth, building a house and getting old with Dee at his side. I was with him the day his wife died. I never was the most important person in his life anymore as he was for me but I was content to be his friend. And we stayed friends until the day he died.

Thanks to www.professorjam.com/weddings for great tips for the wedding ceremony.

Chapter 3

“Aunt Kara, why don’t you come out with us?”

I turn around and see Evan standing before me. He is smiling. Gods, I love that smile.

“I’m enjoying your family pictures. You all look so happy in them.” I say quietly.

“We were. We are.” A sad expression flashes through his eyes. “You think Dad is with her now? He wasn’t very religious.”

“I don’t think that’s important. You don’t have to believe in the gods to go to the afterlife. Your Mom and Dad are united again, I’m sure of that.” I tell him confidently and he smiles again

“I hope so. He missed her so much.”

“Yes, he did.” I try to give him a comforting smile. “They were a wonderful couple.”

“And the best parents.” Evan says smiling.

“Yes, that they were.” I laugh quietly. “I still remember how excited your Dad was when he found out your Mom was pregnant ...”

***********************************************************************

I was walking down the corridor when Lee suddenly appeared before me, grabbed my arm and dragged me into the nearest storage room. Then he hugged me tightly and spun me around. I was utterly confused. Lee dragging me into a storage room and pulling me close to him was still one of my most recurring dreams at the time. His words however weren’t.

“She’s pregnant!”

“What?”

“Dee ... we’re going to have a baby. I’ll be a father! Can you believe that?”

“N-no. I mean, that’s great.” I didn’t really know what to say. I looked at him and ... and I couldn’t help but be happy with him. His eyes were beaming with joy and happiness. I had never seen him look so excited before. When I embraced him and congratulated him and told him how great the news was I really meant it.

“You can’t tell anyone. Dee doesn’t want anyone to know yet. But ... “ He laughed. “I had to tell someone. And if I had told it to Dad, she would find out immediately. He’s been asking for grandchildren since the day we got married.”

His laughter was infectious and we sat down and laughed and I listened to him making plans for the baby. And while I listened to him planning the future of his child, the bitterness in my stomach that grew every time I saw him with Dee suddenly became smaller and smaller. I wasn’t feeling bitter anymore. I was happy for him. And for Dee.

The next months Lee treated Dee with as much care as possible. He was driving her crazy. And he looked everywhere for baby stuff. And that drove me crazy. Every ship we went to he looked for it. I was there when he found the first clothes and something that was sold as diapers. I didn’t think that diapers were supposed to look like that but in times like these you took what you got. After a short while I became an expert in baby clothing and such things. Who would have thought ... Lee built the crib himself and it looked perfect. And he was the proudest father I have ever seen. And when they asked me to be the godmother, I was the proudest godmother in the history of godmothers.

XXXXXXX

The day Dee’s water broke Lee was a nervous wreck. And so was the Old Man. I still have to laugh at the memory of seeing him pacing through sickbay. The great Admiral William “Husker” Adama, hero of two Cylon Wars, was close to a breakdown at waiting for the arrival of his grandchild. We were lucky the Cylons didn’t attack at the time. Neither of the Adamas would have been capable of making any reasonable decisions that day. And to be honest, neither was I.

The birth hadn’t been easy. Dee had been in labor for almost 48 hours. Eventually Cottle decided to take the baby by C-section. I was afraid Adama would die from a heart attack when he heard that news.

But all was forgotten once Lee stepped into the waiting room, a tiny bundle in his arms and a wide grin on his face.

“Everyone, say hi to Sophie Margaret Adama.” He announced proudly.

When I looked at the sleeping baby, I couldn’t help but turn into one of those giggling women I used to despise all my life. “Oh my gods, she’s so cute.” I said with the biggest grin on my face as I gently traced my finger over the baby’s cheeks. “Lee Adama, you’re actually good at something after all.”

“Well, thank you, Aunt Kara.” Lee replied, his grin matching mine to the last.

“Aunt Kara?” I asked with a raised eyebrow. But I liked the sound and my grin managed to become even wider. “You know I’m gonna be the cool aunt who will teach this little girl all the great stuff. Triad, cursing, smoking, drinking ...”

“Don’t ruin my granddaughter before she can even walk.” Adama laughed.

Lee returned to his wife a short while later. He wanted to spend as much time as possible with his family before duty would call him away again. They had the next few hours for themselves but then the whole ship wanted to see their new crewmember. Chief Tyrol and Cally had been one of the first visitors. They were more than happy to have another child on board. President Roslin came several times, the Old Man spent every free minute he could spare with them. Even Tigh had held the little girl in his arms and she managed to put a smile on his face. And I ... I was either found in the cockpit or spoiling my little goddaughter.

When I stepped into Dee’s room in sickbay for the first time, Adama was there talking to her quietly while Lee slept on a chair next to her. As long as Dee had been in labor he had refused to leave her side and therefore he hadn’t had any sleep at all. And while Dee had been sleeping after giving birth, he had spent time with his daughter, unwilling to let go of her until the exhaustion had finally taken hold of him.

Adama was holding little Sophie now and he kept throwing proud glances from her to his son and to Dee.

“She’s the most beautiful little girl I have ever seen.” He said smiling.

“That she is.” I said as I stepped closer to them. “Congratulations Dee.”

“Thanks.” Dee beamed with joy. “You want to hold her?”

“Oh, I don’t know ...” Hesitantly I looked at Sophie and then at Adama who himself looked more then unwilling to let go of his granddaughter. “I never ...”

“Lee never held a baby in his life as well and he did fine. Don’t worry.” She smiled at Adama and reluctantly he handed Sophie to me. Dee always knew how to handle the Adama men.

I fell in love with Sophie from the first moment I held her. It was an amazing feeling and I couldn’t take my eyes from her. Holding the little girl made me feel at peace with the world, a feeling that I usually only had when I was flying. “She is amazing.” I whispered.

“Well, I have to get back to CIC.” Adama said ruefully after a moment. Then he nodded in Sophie’s direction. “The next one will have to be a boy. Someone needs to carry on the Adama name.”

I had to laugh at his words while Dee looked at him terrified.

“Oh no!” She called out. “No, one baby is all you’re going to get. I’m NOT doing this again.”

Of course Dee changed her mind pretty fast. She loved being a mother and 18 months later she was pregnant again. Lee was thrilled, Sophie looked forward to get a baby brother or sister – even though I’m not sure she really understood what that meant but Lee was convinced she was a genius and therefore understood every word one was telling her – and Adama repeatedly told them that he wanted nothing but a grandson this time. He kept saying this every chance he got ... until the day Dee was admitted to lifestation when she was eight months pregnant.

“What happened?” I asked panting as I stormed into sickbay where a devastated Adama already sat waiting.

“I don’t know. All I know is that Lee called CIC and said he couldn’t take his shift because he had to bring Dee to lifestation.” He replied in a voice that sounded close to panic.

“Is the baby coming? Did her cold get worse? Is the baby in danger? Is Dee in danger?” I kept asking questions not even bothering to wait for a reply.

“I don’t know, Kara.”

At that moment Cottle stepped into the waiting area. “No need to panic.” He told us. “She has had a pretty bad cough for the last few days and as I couldn’t give her any antibiotics she has developed pleurisy. Nothing dangerous, but she has to stay here for a few days.”

“Is she or the baby in any danger?” Adama asked alerted.

“No, both will be fine. She just needs some rest.” Cottle assured us .

“Can I see her?” We asked at the same time. As astounding as it was, Dee and I had become friends over the years and I wanted to make sure she was okay.

“Of course, but only for a few minutes.”

When we stepped into Dee’s room, we found Lee sitting at her side, holding her hand.

“Dee ... Ana ...” Adama cleared his throat and I looked at him surprised. He looked guilty.

“I’m sorry. When I ... when I said ... over and over again ... that I wanted a grandson, I didn’t mean ... I mean, I don’t care if it is a boy or a girl as long as you’re both healthy. I’m sorry.”

Dee smiled at him warmly and took his hand in hers. “I know, Dad. And this has nothing to ...” She had to stop talking shortly as she was hit by a coughing fit. Lee held her supportively until the coughing subsided and she went on. “This has nothing to do with you. I just have a cold.”

“Yes, I know, but ... I know I have been giving you a hard time lately with all my talk and I ..”

“Dad ...” Lee interrupted him smiling. “It’s okay. We know you will love this baby, be it a girl or a boy.”

“But ...”

“You couldn’t say no to Sophie even if your life depended on it..” Adama got interrupted again, this time by Dee. “And that only because she’s your granddaughter. I know that you would be the same if we had another daughter. And I know your male pride made you wish for a son. That’s okay, I don’t mind.”

Despite the comforting words of his son and daughter-in-law the Old Man looked miserable. I felt almost sorry for him. But he looked so sweet as he stood in front of Dee, looking so guilty, that I had a hard time not laughing out loud.

“I hope you will be fine soon.” I told Dee, giving her hand a short squeeze. “I just wanted to make sure you’re all right. Lee, take your time here and take care of your wife. I’ll take your CAP.”

I could see that Lee wanted to object – he hated to let his obligations slide – but his desire to stay with his wife won. “Thanks, Kara.”

“No problem. See you later.”

One month later Evan Zachary Adama was born. He was a healthy little boy and I loved him as much as I loved Sophie. They were Lee’s children ... how could I not adore them. Even at their young age they had his smile and his eyes ...

*************************************************************************

“Your grandpa felt so guilty that he started to wish for a daughter. And the next month he kept telling your mother that he didn’t need a son and he just wanted the best for her and her family. Over and over again.” I laugh as I tell Evan that story. I’m sure he heard it a hundred times already. The older I get, the more I tend to tell the same stories again. But somehow I just can’t help it.

“You were always there, weren’t you?”

When I look at him questioningly he starts to explain. “Every important moment in my father’s life you shared with him. You knew him longer than Mom. I envied you often for your relationship. I wish I had a friendship like you and Dad had.”

I try not to sound too sad when I reply. “Yes, your Dad and I were the best friends.”

Chapter 4

I’m sitting in the garden under the big oak, Lee’s favorite place, and I watch his family who have become my own over the years. They are all here, every living member of the ever-growing Adama clan. There are Evan and Sophie who have started their own families by now. Sophie has married Nicholas Tyrol and they have two wonderful children, William and Laura. Evan has married a women, Sarah, who he met here on earth. Their marriage had been the first one between the colonials and the people from earth. They had a little boy, Joseph. Cally is here too, she had been part of the family long before her son had married Sophie ... everyone on the Galactica was a part of the family. Not all of them are still alive, but the ones who are have come here. They all look old and in a few years all that will be left of our lives on the colonies will be stories told to the children who had been born after the attacks. Our memories will die with us.

But I’m not dead yet and I still have my memory. And the older I get, the more I do remember. Everything is as clear as if it happened yesterday. I remember all the good and bad times, the happiness and the sorrow. I don’t ever want to forget a single moment of the life we lived, no matter how painful it might have been at the time. It made me the person I am today.

When I look at Lee’s children, I remember so many good times. They had been a happy family. Lee had learned from his parents mistakes and he had been a wonderful father. Of course he had made mistakes as well – all parents do that every now and then. But his children loved him. I can see that in their faces. And they miss him ... I can hear them tell stories about him, share their memories like they did the day their mother had died. I could tell some stories of my own ... but right now I want to keep my memories to myself. I close my eyes and lean back and I remember ...

*************************************************************************

“Kara, wait.”

When I turned around I saw Lee quickly walking towards me.

“What do you know about Michael Decarro?” He asked as soon as he had reached me.

“Good Morning, Lee. How are you? I’m fine, thanks for asking.” I replied sarcastically. I had hardly seen Lee in days and this was the first thing he said to me?

Lee took a deep breath to calm down. “Sorry. How are you?” The tone of his voice made it clear that he couldn’t care less how I was at the moment.

“Like I said, I’m fine.” I replied.

“Good. What do you know about Michael Decarro?”

“Why?”

“Kara!” He looked at me threateningly.

“Fine.” I rolled my eyes. “Michael Decarro is one of the new nuggets. He’s good. Not a natural, but good.”

His clenched jaw told me that he didn’t like that answer. “Fail him.”

“What?”

“Fail him.” Lee repeated.

“Have you lost your mind? I just said he’s a GOOD pilot. He can fly. He’s going to be a viper pilot. A GOOD viper pilot!”

“He’s dating my daughter.”

I had to use all my willpower not to laugh out loud. “This is what this is about? He’s dating your daughter?”

“Who is your goddaughter. And you know how pilots are. You are a pilot. You really want your goddaughter going on a date with one of them?”

I hated to admit it, but he had a point. “So, what do you want to do?”

“Me? Nothing. I can’t do anything. She would hate me for the rest of her life.” Lee replied dryly. “You fail him and kick him off Galactica. End of story.”

“You really want me to fail all the pilots your daughter is dating?”

Lee thought about that for a moment. “Yes.”

I couldn’t help myself, I had to laugh out loud.

“That’s not funny.”

“Lee, Sophie is your daughter. She grew up with a father and an aunt who are the best pilots in the fleet. And even though you’re not flying as often anymore now that you’re running this ship, she still worships you and with that every pilot on the Galactica.”

“I don’t run this ship. My father does.”

I had so smile. I loved Lee’s loyalty to his father. The Old Man was officially still commanding the Galactica with Lee as his XO. But he was old. He celebrated his 78^th birthday last month. He hardly worked anymore and Lee did his job. But he still refused to let anyone call him Commander of the Galactica. That was his father’s title as long as he was alive. And I loved him for that.

“You can’t stop Sophie from dating the pilots.” I stated dryly, returning to the actual subject of this conversation.

“She’s sixteen!”

“Exactly, it’s a wonder she hasn’t been on dates before. Especially with me as her aunt.” I said the last part with a small hint of pride in my voice. “She’ll probably start viper training herself soon. She’s her father’s girl.”

Lee’s shoulders sagged down in defeat. “I don’t like it.”

“You don’t like your daughter becoming a viper pilot?”

“No, I’m fine with that. We haven’t seen any Cylons in years, so I think that’s safe for her. But being around pilots all day ...” His voice trailed off and he looked at me helplessly.

“I don’t think you need to worry. Her grandfather is the Admiral of the fleet, her father is the XO and her godmother is the CAG. Not to forget Dee ... she would kill every man with her bare hands who would dare to hurt her children. No one is going to dare to treat Sophie in any bad way.” I assured him.

“You better be right.” Lee muttered cranky.

“So when’s the date?”

“Tonight.” He practically spat the word out.

“You wanna go for a drink tonight then? Getting drunk might turn this into a not so horrible night for you.”

“No, I can’t. I want to make sure she comes home at the right time.”

I had to laugh again. “You’re one of them now.”

He looked at me questioningly and I explained. “One of the fathers you were afraid to meet every time you picked up a girl at her house.”

Lee’s face suddenly lighted up. “You’re right.” His lips turned into an evil grin. “This kid will be going through hell when he picks up my daughter.”

Michael Decarro only went out that one time with Sophie. Lee had scared him away for good ... much to the delight of his daughter who found the date more than miserable. Michael wasn’t the only one Lee managed to scare, but she had her share of boyfriends over the years. She never paid much attention to Nicholas Tyrol who was working as a deckhand as his parents did. She was only interested in the pilots. But she changed her mind eventually and when she fell in love with Nick everyone was convinced it would be forever. And they were right. So far they were still as happy as on their first day.

XXXXXXX

Evan was right. I was there on every special moment in Lee’s life. I was there the day he got married, the day his children were born, when they became pilots, when they got married. And I was there when they got their own children. I was at his side the day we found earth and I was with him the day his father died. He had been sick for some time and eventually it had become so bad that he couldn’t leave his quarters anymore. Dr. Ishay had arranged for a sickbay bed to be placed in his room to make it more comfortable for him. When he neared the end, Lee made sure that someone was always at his side ... it had been Sophie and Evan who had called everyone when his breathing had gotten uneven.

When William Adama died, his whole family was at his side. I remember that he once told me he was afraid to die as a lonely man. His son wasn’t talking to him at the time, he was divorced and he was about to retire. Without the crew of Galactica he had no one. But when he died, he wasn’t alone. His son and daughter-in-law were at his side as well as his grandchildren and I – the woman he had virtually adopted as his own daughter. He even woke up for a short moment and looked at all of us. And I could have sworn there was a small smile on his lips. He wasn’t alone.

Lee hardly spoke to anyone on the day of his funeral. He held a warm and loving speech and thanked everyone politely for the condolences. But when we all came together afterwards, he withdrew himself. I found him in the chapel ... the one place he could have been sure no one would find him. But I knew him too well for that.

“That was a nice speech.” I said quietly as I sat down next to him on the bench.

“Thanks.” He replied in a hoarse voice. I could hear he had been crying.

“I already miss him.” I took his hand in mine as I spoke.

“Yeah ...” He wiped a tear away with his free hand. “I wish he had lived long enough to see it. Earth, I mean ...”

“He knew we are on the right path. And he knew you will lead us there. He always had so much confidence in you.”

“It meant so much to him ... finding earth. I can’t believe he will never see it.” His shoulders sagged down. “Maybe we won’t either.”

“We will.” I said with as much determination as I could muster on a day like this.

“How can you be so sure?” He looked at me and all hope seemed to have left his eyes.

“Because you’re his son. The Old Man promised us earth. It just turned out to be too far away for him to reach it. But he knew we were in good hands. You’re his son, Lee, in every possible way. You’ll bring us there for that reason alone.”

He didn’t say anything after that and after a moment I leaned my head on his shoulder. We stayed like that for a long time, just sitting in the dark, indulging ourselves in our own memories of him.

I was always at Lee’s side. We found earth, settled down and we grew old. We didn’t do any of it together ... but that was okay. I was content to watch him do all these things with Anastasia. I was happy as long as I knew that he was.

********************************************************************

As I’m sitting here under Lee’s oak, watching his family and remembering all those moments in our life, I feel very old. I close my eyes and let myself fall back into the chair. I feel myself drifting away ... I’m so tired.

It seems like an eternity and only the split of the second at the same time. When I open my eyes again, I see them standing in front of me. The Old Man, Lee and Dee, Tigh, Helo, Tyrol ... all the people form the Galactica who have died before me. I see my family ... When I stand up and go to them I don’t feel old anymore. I feel light ...

I’m home.

The end.