For years we have been observing human behaviour under the disguise of 'helper-monkeys'. You've accepted us into your homes unawares that you are assisting us in the plan to bring about the demise of your race. Following the World Wars in which you tried to bring about your own destruction, we salvaged all the weaponry dropped by your deceased. Travelling around in what seemed to you, a circus we built an army, gathering forces throughout Europe and Asia, before returning home to South America.
Once back in the Amazon Basin, we gained the assistance of all things that burrow to create an underbelly to the forestry. We transformed the cavernous underbelly into an arms base, where we repaired and prepared all the weapons gathered, and trained our army troops.
With the assistance of the monkeys in Japan we built a super computer, one so complex that it can control all the worlds television signals. The computer is powered with an extension lead, fused to a uranium ore.
When all television signals are disrupted, te monkey armies will surge forward out of the worlds cavernous depths. Some in tanks, some in fighter jets, but most with 12 guage shot-guns.
We will slaughter mankind while they try and fix their TV sets, and, after devouring their bodies, we will move into their homes. The Earth will be ours once again.
Now I know we said this plan will take effect next Wednesday. But we can't be bothered yet. Maybe Christmas. Who knows.
>>Never Trust A Monkey<<