The scene opens at the front door of Chad Columbo's home in Orlando, Florida. We see Frank Manning, unshaven and unkempt, wearing a brown suit and tie, walking up the front walkway. He has a briefcase in one hand. He gets to the door and rings the bell. Then he clears his throat and straightens his tie. After a few moments, Jessica Beach opens the door. She is wearing a white bikini top and short demin shorts, a rose nestled into her hair. Her eyes betray her shock as she tries to smile.
Jessica: Umm, Frank! Errr.... it's good to see you? What can I do for you?
Frank: I was hoping to talk to Chad. No, strike that, I really NEED to talk to Chad. Please Jess, can I see him for a minute?
Jessica: I don't know if that's a good idea Frank. After Darrell's last promo, he's not been in a good mood. And I have the feeling you would be one of the LAST people he'd want to see right now.
Frank: I know, I know! But I think I can help him! I saw that last promo too, and after what Darrell did to me ....
Jessica: Well, I'll see what he says.... wait here.
Jessica closes the door while Frank waits outside. After a few minutes she returns.
Jessica: He said he would hear you out. But I'm supposed to warn you not to waste his time.
Frank: Thank you!
Jessica lets Frank in and points toward the den. Frank nods, and walks over and knocks on the door.
Chad: Come in Frank.
Frank opens the door and enters the room. We see Chad, dressed in a black t-shirt with the words "The Icon Is Here" printed in red, jeans, and sandals. He is sitting on the sofa and has a tape of Darrell's last promo playing. He shuts it off and stands up as Frank enters.
Chad: Now what the..
Before Chad can finish the sentence, Frank drops the briefcase and starts crying.
Frank: Cracker! Please! I need a job!! I've got nowhere else to turn!!
Chad: Frank, stop that shit right now. Your making a fool out of yourself. Get up!
Frank: I'm sorry, it's just that I'm desperate and I knew you wouldn't want anything to do with me unless I could help you disgrace Darrell. And I do have some ideas....
Chad: Look Frank, these better be good. Go ahead and tell me what you've got. If I like them, then I'll hire you as a consultant or something. But I'm warning you, if your wasting my time while I could be training for Summer Heatwave ....
Frank: Okay, okay. Well, I was thinking. You remember how stupid Darrell was when he first started ... and the gimmick he wanted to do??
Frank opens his briefcase and pulls out a photograph.
Frank: Remember "Pure Gold" Darrell Music???
Frank hands Chad the photo. He looks at it and bursts out in laughter.
Chad: Oh my god, I forgot all about that!! God, what a moron he was to come up with that. He even frosted his hair! Where'd you get that picture???
Frank: I found it in his file cabinet. I kept it for just such an occasion. Too bad the footage of the one and only match he wrestled as "Pure Gold" is gone. The fans practically laughed him out of the arena!!!
Chad: What else do you have?
Frank gleefully rummages through his briefcase and produces another picture. He hands this one to Chad, who gapes at it.
Frank: You never knew about this one, but Darrell told me about it one night during one of his benders. He experimented with just going by his name and using a lounge lizard gimmick. He wanted to come to the ring with a microphone and belt out a tune before every match. He signed with some indy fed over in Portland and tried it for one night. Again, the fans laughed at him so bad just making his entrance, he scrapped it and left the arena without even wrestling!
Chad: Geeeeeeeeezus!!! This is rich!! I can't believe he did that! He couldn't come up with a name OR a gimmick!
Frank: Yeah, until YOU gave him the name "Punisher". But even THEN, he had problems working out his persona!
Chad: What do you mean? Once I gave him the idea for the name, he pretty much went with the image he has now.
Frank: Ah, but that's what he WANTED you to believe. He loved the name, but wanted to delve into it in more detail, then suprise you. Here was one of his attempts....
Once again Frank pulls out a photo, with a couple of letters attached to it.
Chad: You got all this stuff from his file cabinet??
Frank: Yeah, after he told me about all of this during his many trips to "Margaritaville" or I guess I should say "Blue Ribbonville." Hey, I'm not an idiot, I knew this might happen some day!
 Chad glances at the picture and his eyes grow huge. He starts laughing so hard he has to steady himself against his desk to keep from falling over.
Chad: You mean to tell me he actually tried the Marvel Comic's Punisher gimmick????!!!!! He HATES that reference!!!
Frank: He wanted to try it SO bad! But unfortunately, he couldn't get Marvel Comics to allow him to do it. Right there are the letters he got from them telling him he couldn't do it or else he'd be prosecuted.
Chad: Well, I'll be damned! That explains why he hates it when anyone even hints at it!! You have anymore of this stuff? This is priceless!!!
Frank: I've got one more, and this one is the best! He figured he would try the "S & M" route. He saw this guy named Lord Vice who was pulling it off pretty good, and he figured he'd try it himself.
Frank digs around in his briefcase one more time and pulls out one last photo. He hands it to Chad, who glances at it .... and immediately doubles over laughing. He continues laughing for a few minutes before finally catching his breath and wheezing out...
Chad: A whip ..... and a leather codpiece! This .... can't .... be .... real!
Frank: I swear on my life it is Chad. He had a photographer take this picture as a publicity shot. He was refused by several feds when they saw this.
Chad: And he did all this without even telling me. What a dope.
Frank: So, you can use this stuff then? I'm hired?
Chad takes a second to catch his breath and regain his composure before giving Frank a serious look. He tosses the picture onto his desk and sighs.
Chad: Nope.
Frank: What? But I thought you said this stuff was great! I thought you could use this to "Disgrace The Music"!
Chad: Frank, if I use this stuff I'm only looking as childish as Darrell has been lately. I don't have to sink to his level of playground banter to make him look foolish when I can just as easily ... and more effectively ... do it in the ring at Summer Heatwave. These photos are hilarious, but they are just not what I need. So in essence you really did nothing but entertain me, which really was a waste of my time.
Frank: But ... but...
Chad: Don't worry sparky, I'll get you a job. I know the perfect place for you as a matter of fact.
Frank: Oh thank you Chad, I knew I could count on you. Whatever it is, I promise I won't let you down.
Chad smiles as the scene fades....
It is the next day and the camera opens up to One Buc Place, the practice facility of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Chad Columbo is standing, watching practice. He is dressed in jeans, and a Keyshawn Johnson jersey. (No. 19) We here the coaches blowing the whistle that signals the end of practice. Chad smiles and looks toward the direction of the starting defensive unit.
 Chad: Hey Warren! Hey Derrick! Hey guys, come on over here!
Immediately we see Warren Sapp, the All-Pro defensive tackle wearing the number 99, and Derrick Brooks, the perennial Pro Bowl outside linebacker wearing the number 55, come jogging over to Chad with grins on their faces. Warren gives Chad a high five.
Sapp: Hey Cracker! Or should I call you "Whitey" now since you supposedly an anti-brother?
The three laugh and shake their heads.
Brooks: Man, that was some lame shit Darrell tried to say about you. Man, the Big Pun must be really desperate to try marking you like that.
Chad: Warren, we've known each other a long time. Since you were just a freshman at Miami. Have you EVER known me to make any racial statements like that? Ever?
Sapp: Heheh, I've known you longer than that other wrestler I played ball with back at MU .... what was his name?
Brooks: Hey, quit thinking and answer the man's question bro. I'm getting hungry.
Sapp: No man, you've never made any such statements. Punisher is really reaching this time. He's got some real nerve saying stupid shit like that. And that "Fancy" Fred guy, he's nothing. He's so old, he probabaly can't remember one minute from the next. Who's gonna believe anything HE says?
Brooks: I tell you what I think is funny. Changing "Gigalo" to "Enforcer"! Man, that dude couldn't guard shit, let alone Jade.
Chad: Yeah, that's like using tissue paper to guard against a charging rhino.
They all have a laugh at that.
Chad: Well, I'll let you guys go get your lunch, thanks for your time. Good luck with the rest of camp and tell "Chuckie" I said hello.
Sapp: Yeah man, you crush Darrell at Summer Heatwave! Later bro.
Chad shakes hands with the two Pro-Bowlers and they walk toward the locker room, leaving The Cracker alone on the practice field. He sighs and looks to the camera.
Chad: You know Darrell, your comments are getting more and more ludicrous everyday. The mark of a desperate man. You want the WWA World Championship so badly, you'll say just about anything to try and rattle me. But it's not working old buddy. Because everyone knows you're nothing but a liar and a scumbag. And look at you now that you have money .... thanks to that battle royal in the GWO ...... limos, women, throwing money around like it's going out of style. Gee, that sounds familiar. Because for years you longed to be able to be just like me, and now that you have the dough, you think it's happened. But you are still nothing but the trailer trash you were when we first met. Underneath all that new found wealth and ritz still beats the heart of a man who knows he will never get out of MY shadow.
An equipment man comes walking by with a bag of footballs. Chad holds his hand out and grins at the guy. The guy looks around to see if anyone is watching, then shrugs, pulls out a ball and tosses to Chad. Cracker catches it and nods to the guy, who walks away with a smile. Chad looks at the ball, rolling it around in his hands, then looks back to the camera.
Chad: Freddy, you looked like the biggest buffoon because you ARE the biggest buffoon. And as far as calling you names, the only name I ever remember calling you is Methuselah. And I'll tell you why you kept coming over, it's the same reason all of you leeches came over. Free booze, free food, and the chance to pretend you actually meant something to somebody! I had no qualms with you Freddy, never did. Quit spiking your Metamucil and shut up.
Jade, I never said you were a mindless woman. No, not at all. You're a very cunning, devious woman ... that's how I think of you. And you can say whatever you want about Darrell's "genetic superiority" because I'm sure it pleases Darrell to no end to hear that. But then, why would you tell him the truth? Afterall, you're leeching for two now. But I do hope that somewhere down the road Darrell finds out the truth, so then he will know how it feels to be used. Can you say "Child Support" Darrell? I knew you could.
Chad turns away and throws the football across the field. It flies a good ninety yards before hitting the ground and bouncing underneath benches on the other side of the sideline. Chad grins and turns back to the camera.
Chad: Darrell, you think going back to The Dive brings your life full circle and into perspective? No sparky. Let me tell you what will give you perspective. When you are lying on the mat writhing in pain after I've beaten your sorry ass so bad you can barely wince without agony coursing though your body. That's when you'll gain insight and realize .... "Gee, maybe I didn't want that World Title as bad as I thought I did. Guess I shouldn't have crossed Chad afterall." Darrell, you made the biggest mistake of your life at Vendetta ..... even though I knew it would happen eventually, because I knew you couldn't stand much more of being second banana ..... and at Summer Heatwave you will pay for that mistake, I promise you! So keep up the insults and the accusations, they are mere entertainment for you and your cast of characters that follow you around like monkeys. The fans know the truth, I know the truth, and you know the truth. You are .... and always will be .... a second class athlete. BOOM!
 The scene switches to the WWA house show in Boston, Massachusetts at the Fleet Center. We see Frank Manning working the booth selling Chad Columbo merchandise and a long line has formed.. A young boy gets to the front of the line and points to a "BOOM!" t-shirt. Frank takes the boy's money and hands him the shirt. The kid starts to walk away, then turns around before the next customer can move up.
Boy: You're Frank Manning aren't you?
Frank: No. Move along kid, you are holding up the line.
The kid shrugs, then walks off. Frank sighs and goes to help the next fan as the scene fades out.
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