Fable of coffee Maxwell House

Once upon a time in a far off land, lived a boy and a girl. The boy’s name was Thomas Maxwell and the girl was Loretta Maxwell. These children were normally good-natured and followed their mother’s instructions. One day a man walked out of the woods next to their house. “At last I’m out!!” The man shouted. He had a beard that stretched into the woods. The man wobbled and fell down, so the children’s mother came out of the house to help him. “I have found a great drink that keeps you energized and awake in the woods!” At that the man passed out. The mother and children carried him in side the house. Three days had passed and the man was still asleep. “Let us go get his drink from the woods. He’ll wake up and we’ll be rid of him.” Said the children. “ No.” said the mother. Those are the lost woods if you go in there you will be lost forever…. Don’t for get your uncle Ronald went in there and has never returned.. Now go out and play.” The mother cried. The children wanted the man gone so bad that they took a bag of pebbles and started in to the woods. They walked for miles leaving a pebble trail behind them, until they reached a clearing in the middle of the woods. A House that looked like it was made of chocolate sat in the middle. The children ran out to it and examined it. At a touch a hunk of the low hanging roof broke off. The children ate a small bite of it. The spit and sputtered at the rancid taste. As they spat out chunks of the house the door opened and an old witch came out. She grabbed the children and tied them up. She lit her oven and took out a pot. “Please don’t eat us!!” The children cried. The witch pulled off a little chunk of the wall and dropped it in the pot.  She added water and let it boil on the stove. The kids watched as she maid a drink out of the rancid tasting house. “The beans I made this house are not suitable for eating… but drinking them makes you never sleep!” The witch cackled. She too the pot off the stove and drank the entire pot. Then holding the pot over her head she managed to get one last drop out of the pot. She smacked her lips. “ AHHHHH good to the last drop!” She then turned to the rack on the stove and opened it. “Now to cook my catch!” she said looking in to the oven to get it ready. The children in an effort stood up and rammed the witch in to the stove. The then found a knife and cut the ropes off their hand.  They grabbed the pot and as much of the house as they could get and using their path they went home. Their mother sat on the porch of the house waiting for them. “So you went and disobeyed me!” she scolded. “But momma!” Cried the boy “we came back! We made a path of rocks to help us back.” The children recounted their adventure and told their mom how to make the drink. Soon the mom had made the drink and tasted it. “It’s not half bad.” She said feeling a little peppier. She then rushed to the man's bed and forced him to drink some. He woke up immediately and started to cough. He sat up and thanked the children and their mother and started to tell his story. As it turned out he was the children’s uncle and he was forced to build the witches house and drink the drink. “ The one thing is.” He said “Is that every time you drink it…. You cough! But it’s only for the first three cups…. Then you get used to it.” “We should call coiffing!” cried the children. “No said their mother: we’ll call it coffee.” And thus was the story of the Maxwell’s and their house of beans. And how the phrase “good to the last drop came to be.

Bordem once again..... But it's fun!