Reasons why you need to stop calling me:
You are a cowardly little bastard
With short legs who still lives at home
And is pushing 30. You have pointed feet.
You paint plastic comic book figurines
For comfort. You make prank calls.
You get upset if I don't call comic books
Graphic novels. You misquote Shakespeare.
You brag about your Role Playing Gamer Don Juan
Reputation. You have bad breath
And a big head and a bat tattoo -
On your back no less.
You have hairy toes and you cackle
Like a chicken, like Great-aunt Myra
When you find yourself amusing.
You drive a tiny white jeep with a tinny horn
And think yourself sexy. The jeep, of course,
Has a bat in the back window. You brag
About your sweat-lodge vision
Which you had with your blood brother,
An Italian kid from the Bronx who was so
High on peyote he believed you when you
Said your totem was Bruce Wayne. You
Talk to the TV. You talk at me.
You don't listen.