Engineering, Physics, and Math
It's a good thing they didn't include programmers in here.
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As an experiment, an engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are
placed in separate rooms and left with a can of food, but no can
opener. A day later, the rooms are opened, one-by-one.
In the first room, the engineer is snoring, with a battered, opened
and emptied can. When asked, he explains that when he got hungry, he
beat the can to its failure point.
In the second room, the physicist is seen mouthing equations, with a
can popped open beside him. When asked, he explains that when he got
hungry, he examined the stress points of the can, applied pressure,
and "pop!"
In the third room, the mathematician is found sweating, and mumbling
to himself, "Assume the can is open, assume the can is open..."
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* Engineers think that equations approximate the real world.
* Scientists think that the real world approximates equations.
* Mathematicians are unable to make the connection...
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A Mathematician, a Biologist and a Physicist are sitting in a street
cafe watching people going in and coming out of the house on the other
side of the street.
First they see two people going into the house. Time passes. After a
while they notice three persons coming out of the house.
The Physicist: "The measurement wasn't accurate.". The Biologists
conclusion: "They have reproduced". The Mathematician: "If now exactly
1 person enters the house then it will be empty again."
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An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are shown a pasture with
a herd of sheep, and told to put them inside the smallest possible
amount of fence.
The engineer is first. He herds the sheep into a circle and then puts
the fence around them, declaring, "A circle will use the least fence
for a given area, so this is the best solution."
The physicist is next. She creates a circular fence of infinite radius
around the sheep, and then draws the fence tight around the herd,
declaring, "This will give the smallest circular fence around the
herd."
The mathematician is last. After giving the problem a little thought,
he puts a small fence around himself and then declares, "I define
myself to be on the outside!"
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An engineer, a mathematician, and a physicist went to the races one
Saturday and laid their money down. Commiserating in the bar after the
race, the engineer says, "I don't understand why I lost all my money.
I measured all the horses and calculated their strength and mechanical
advantage and figured out how fast they could run..."
The physicist interrupted him: "...but you didn't take individual
variations into account. I did a statistical analysis of their
previous performances and bet on the horses with the highest
probability of winning..."
"...so if you're so hot why are you broke?" asked the engineer. But
before the argument can grow, the mathematician takes out his pipe and
they get a glimpse of his well-fattened wallet. Obviously here was a
man who knows something about horses. They both demanded to know his
secret.
"Well," he says, between puffs on the pipe, "first I assumed all the
horses were identical and spherical..."
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geocities.com/vahid_nasiri)