That's right ladies and gentlemen, step right up and allow me to introduce an entirely new sensation to your weary, dreary days. This miracle tonic doesn't come in a pill...and yet it can lighten your heavy heart! This wonderful elixer doesn't come in a flask...but it may make you want to dance until the room is spinning! It doesn't need to be smoked, swallowed, injected or inhaled. This incredible natural resource has been known to induce euphoria and soothe savage aggression and yet it is completely healthy and can be used every day. And folks, let me tell you the best part of all. You don't even have to open your wallets today, only your minds. That's right, you can get a free sample of this revivifying cure-all from me today and pay not one penny. All I ask you to pay is attention. So please, step inside if you would and receive your own curious and enlightening dose of.....The Upper Twelve.
