Many a poor husband was once a rich bachelor.

A smart husband is one who thinks twice before saying nothing.

More husbands would leave home if they knew how to pack their suitcases.

Married men make the best husbands.

Why do husbands talk about their in-laws as if their wives didn't have any?

He is a model husband, but not a working model.

Her husband came in handy around the house until one day he came in unexpected.

They now have a gadget that does all the housework. It's called a Husband.

All husbands are alike, but they have different faces so you can tell them apart.

My husband has a split personality and I hate both of them.

A smart husband buys his wife very fine china so she won't trust him to wash it.

John is the sweetest, most wonderful husband in the world. Too bad I married Fred.

She is always after a husband and she doesn't care whose.

Husbands are like wood fires. When unattended they go out.

The average husband knows where and when he got married. What escapes him is why.

The only time a husband is right is when he admits he's wrong.

"Is your husband hard to please?"
"I don't know. I never tried."

"Who's that lady with the little wart?"
"Schhhh. That's her husband."

"What do you use for washing dishes?"
"Oh, I tried many things, but found my husband best."

"A husband like yours is hard to find."
"He still is."

"If you were my husband I'd give you poison."
"If I were your husband I'd take it."

"How long did you work for your husband?"
"Till I got him."

"Is your husband a weight watcher?"
"Yes, he watches every girl under 120 pounds."

"Does your husband go out much at night?"
"I don't know. I'll ask the next time I see him."

"I've got my husband to the point where he eats out of my hand."
"Saves a lot of washing up, doesn't it?"

"Here is a book: How to torture your husband."
"I don't need that. I have a system of my own."

"What kind of husband do you think I should look for?"
"Better leave the husbands alone and look for a single man."
HUSBANDS
A message for Americans
Murray Walker
A mans sex life!