w000000t! Food! I'm starving!
Are we ready to start?
Wait a moment, guys.
Aww, when do we eat? I'm going to snack on Van if you don't hurry up!
He will, too. Make it quick.
Well, since it's Thanksgiving and all, I thought that we could all say what we're thankful for in the form of a song.
...
What do you mean, Ryo?
You mean to say that we're all supposed to spontaneously burst into song, which will magically be in key and somehow our lines will rhyme? And let me guess, an orchestra--which wouldn't even fit into this dining room--will come out of nowhere and accompany us.
Pretty much, yeah.
Sweet.
Sounds doable.
Let's get going! The sooner we eat the better.
Who should start?
Oh, we don't start, we wait for the conductor to cue the orchestra.
...
...
...
*AHEM* We wait for the conductor to cue the orchestra!
Oi, Riley, what're you doing?
The techs are going crazy on headset. I'm writing down a few choice phrases to send to my old paramilitary buddies as Christmas gifts.
ORCHESTRA
Play play play.
(It's about bloody time.)
(I'm shocked, Ryo. Such harsh language.)
(Oh, hush.)
(Places!)
This time of year is when we come together for a meal,
And talk about the gratitude that each of us must feel.
Surrounded by my comrades, I can't help but think about--
How fun it is to bury people nostril-deep in grout!
(What?!)
I'm thankful for hot-pot, and thankful for rice balls.
I'm thankful for shopping in glamorous night malls. (Hey there, Kenshin.)
(I'm thankful for women even when they touch me in places they should not.)
I'm grateful for people who don't try to kill me,
And for frolicking out on a well-watered lawn.
A tender embrace...
My beautiful face...
Some personal space...
The delectable race
To get at the ice cream before it's all gone!
I'm thankful for peace...
And battle!
Friends...
And carnage!
(What's up with the psycho?)
(You want me to take him?)
I love bloodthirsty tyrants who always employ you.
I'm thankful to have an excuse to destroy you!
I'm glad that when war's done, there's always another... *TWITCH*
And I'm thankful to have such a kind older brother.
Don't buy it, you moron, he's faking!
If you try anything, I'll be breaking
Your spine!
Fine!
Watch out for the stuffing and dressing--oh dear.
Could somebody pass me a little more beer?
I'm thankful for muffins with butter and jelly,
Sparkling cider, champagne, and milk fresh from the cow.
Mashed potatoes and gravy that fill up my belly, and--
Dog food? Who brought dog food?
Oh, hahahaha! I thought Inuyasha might like it.
Want to see what I'll feed you ten seconds from now?
I'm grateful for forests and mountains and plains,
For trustworthy friends who endure through the worst,
And for allies who triumph through losses and gains.
Ow!
Would you stop that?
Forget it! You first!
(Allen and Van just rolled over my salad...)
I'm thankful for tear gas and crowd-control weapons;
They're perfect for stopping disorderly conduct.
Heh heh...
Ha ha...
A truce?
A truce.
How could both of you trample my chocolate mousse?
Mmph {munch chew} distractions mmph momph {slurp chomp guzzle}
Mph making {chew} easy to get to the food.
Cut it out, Inuyasha, that's not very nice!
Come back here! I'll hit you with more than fried rice!
ORCHESTRA
Instrumental interlude.
Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiii....
(Ye gods, the call of a siren!)
(Sirens are female, dip.)
(D'oh!)
...iiiiiiiii don't often express myself, but when I do, I find
That those I choose to call my friends are honest, just and kind.
(Nee, I never pegged Koji as the campy type.)
(Me either.)
And though I love them dearly, I proclaim to all the lands
That those who really piss me off, I'll kill with my bare hands!
(Aha, that's the Koji we know and love!)
(Run, you fool!)
(Yeek!)
In the midst of this excitement, may I not forget to see
How much your camaraderie and friendship mean to me.
I really want to tell you--this brings tears into my eye...
EXPECTANT PAUSE
...
...While you were busy singing, I ate all the pumpkin pie!
DIE!
ORCHESTRA
Flourish.
([Braaaaaaap] I hope no one else wanted turkey.)
(Roasted Mulder will do just fine.)
ORCHESTRA
Finis.
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