Ford Capri Jokes.

Two blokes talking in the pub.

Bloke 1: How is that old Ford Capri that you bought doing ??

Bloke 2: Not going too bad, but it can only get up to 75 going up Kingshill.

Bloke 1: But that's good going for Kingshill ??

Bloke 2: No it isn't, coz I live at number 83 !!!!

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When is a Capri like a frog? 
When it's being toad!

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What's a difference between sheep and Capris?

People don't get embarrassed being seen in sheep.

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What's a difference between a hedgehog and a Capri?

The hedgehog has the pricks on the outside.

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What do you call a Capri with twin exhausts?

A wheel barrow.

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I had a mate who, like me, was a bit of a capri nut but the
stigma and bad image make him think twice about it. Finally
with all the bad jokes about fluffy dice, tiger skin seat
covers and this and that he wanted a new car.

So he went out and bought a skoda!!

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MAN: Do you want to come for a drive in my car??
BOY: NO!!
M: I will give you a packet of crisps.
B: NO!!
M: I will give you a packet of crisps, and a mars bar.
B: NO!!
M: I will give you a packet of crisps, and a mars bar and a fiver.
B: NO!!
M: So what can I give you??
B: Dad, there is now way that I am going in your CAPRI!!!

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I went to the spares department of my local accessory shop
and asked for a set of spark plugs for my Capri. After some
thought by the staff member he said that it was a fair swap.

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Why do Capris have heated rear windows?

To keep your hands warm when pushing them.

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2.8i(q)

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What do you call an open top Capri?

A skip.

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What's the ambition of a Capri driver?

To get caught speeding.

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Why do Capri drivers have their names on their sunstrips?

To remind them who they are.

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Why do Capri drivers have fluffy dice?

So they know want comes after two.

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What's a Capri driver's favourite chat up line?

'Here Luv, give us a push!'

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How did the Capri driver break his nose?

He tripped over his medalion.

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How do you double the value of a Capri?

Put an air freshener in it.

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How do you get to Wales in a Capri?

You'll be lucky.

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Did you hear about the Capri driver who opened the 
door to let the clutch out?

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