Neigbours Mongrels

A selection of some of the bad boys, meatheads and darn right mongrels who have crossed the paths of some of Ramsay Street's unfortunate residents.

Criteria by which Mongrel ratings are assessed: They depend on the crimes the mongrel committed, and whether or not they were caught out.

Teabag Teasdale

Episodes: 3385 - about 3418

Teabag causing trouble at the Coffee Shop

Was the speaking character in a local BMX gang Tad Reeves had come across while making a BMX video. He tried to get Tad to lob a brick through Grease Monkeys, the new restuarant that was robbing trade from the coffee shop. His bad deeds don't stop there - he shows interest in Hannah Martin, which also bring tensions against Paul who has eyes for her too. A rift at home over the Martin's plans to move to Darwin see Hannah even considering sharing a house with old Teasdale. His real felonies begin when he starts to terrorise the Bishop family, including ordering 10 extra large pizzas to their house. Paul and Tad's attempts to get their own back only lead to them getting into trouble themselves. Teabag was last seen on the premises of Erinsborough High giving a leaving gift to Hannah - while he was told to leave by Teresa Bell his main offences apparently went completely unpunished.

Mongrel rating: 4/5

Mickey Dalton

Episodes: about 3080 to 3100

Mickey after breaking his leg.

Mickey was basically a plot device allowing a way of getting Paul McClain into trouble before Tad Reeves came onto the scene. His most prolific scam was to anonoymously order a mass of pizzas for the school formal from the Coffee Shop (sound vaguely familiar?). Quite how he expected to actual be able to eat the pizzas is a different matter, since foul play was obviously going to realised immediately as the pizzas arrived. He blames the fiasco on Paul getting him into trouble and soon they start fighting. If my memory serves me correctly in breaking up the fight Mickey falls and breaks his leg, and blames it on Susan Kennedy, causing her much agro from Mickey's mother who plans on taking him out the school but he eventually admits the truth.

Mongrel rating: 2/5

Trevor Jansen

Episode: 3647

Associate of con-artist Patsy Edis. He loaded up the van taking away all the stuff stolen from Lou's house. He was evidently quite good at thinking on his feet coming up with the excuse for why his suppossed Salvation Army van didn't have any stickers on it. As far as I know he's still on the run because while Patsy was caught in the nick of time, Trev got away and no reference has been made to any of Lou's possessions being recovered.

Mongrel rating: 3/5

Maurie Ryan

Episodes: 3373-3402, 3532-3597

Maurie looking set for a fight with Karl Kennedy.

Maurie first came onto the scene when Bill Kennedy got a job with him on a building site. Maurie was not one to play by the book and this tendancy to cut corners caused a moral dilemna for Billy-boy who wanted to keep his job. In the end his disregard for safety caused one of Bill's colleagues, Sam Rodgers, to lose the ability to walk. Having escaped prosecution, Maurie found his wife Glenda with breast cancer soon after Karl Kennedy, the doctor that controversy follows like a hawk, had claimed she was all clear. Never one to pass up the oppurtunity to make a quick buck, he pressurisied old Glenda into going ahead with the law suit against her will. At the same time he went into partnership with new mongrel on the block Joe Scully compounding their own tensions in the street (others having been over land and the cricket club). In the end Glenda decided not to testify in the case as she believed Karl to be a good doctor, but already patients had left in droves. Maurie was most recently seen with his daughter Lisa who dated Lance for a short while.

Mongrel rating: 3/5

Wendy Barker

Episodes: 3564-3576

Gime me my money Alfie!

A member of Tasmania's middle-aged criminal underworld, believing that Harold was Alfie Dougherty who had been involved in an armed robbery, she harasses Harold as Alfie owes her some money. When his lack of a tattoo persuades her he's Harold after all she is then reluctant to go to the cops, presumably due to a criminal past of her own. However she was a pretty poor mongrel in the end as she did dob old Alfie in and he was apparently captured.

Mongrel rating: 1/5

David 'Fanto' Hodges

Episodes: about 3358 - 3437

Started life as the mysterious David leaving messages for Anne at the Wilkinson house. This puzzled Anne as she didn't think she knew a David and raised early jealousy from Billy in their ever so fragile relationship. It turned out David was someone from Anne's art course at Uni who she knew only as Fanto, due to his love of Phantom comics. The jealousy that Bill has over Anne's friendship with Fanto is the partial cause of yet another break up. Fanto steps in and tries to make their relationship more than friendship. After initial resistance she eventually succums. The first real signs of Fanto's sinister side come when he asks Amy to pose naked for him. Fanto manages to get them an art studio which Anne goes and lives in. However, what doesn't come to light for some time is that while Fanto charges everyone rent, he gets it free from his dad. This shatters Anne's delusions about him and the scene is set for the basically inevitable Bill-Anne relationship being fulfilled.

Mongrel rating: 2/5

Henk Forster

Episodes: 3274-3297

As I recall it, one evening at Lou's Place, Toadfish Rubecci gets into a fight with a local mongrel by the name of Henk Forster for some reason or other, probably due to him trying to get the attentions of Sarah Beaumont, and ends up decking him. End of story you might think, but then one afternoon Toadie and Craig Pinhead Pinders have a light argument and then later that day Pinhead gets injured in a car crash resulting in him going into a coma. The other car involved was a Yellow Beetle, ie. Toadie's. However Toadie claimed on the day of the accident his car had been stolen but he had not gone to the police about it as he found it abandoned and little had been taken from it. For one rare occassion on Neighbours they didn't tell you whether he'd done the crime or not. However Toadie protested his innocence the whole way through and eventually gained the services of Janine Matthews who was a witness. Sarah at the pub notices Henk has very similar glasses to those Toadie lost. Toadie manages to hatch a plan and gets Janine to identify Henk and Constable Ryan Moller to come and arrest Henk at Lou's Place. Meanwhile Craig Pinders made a full recovery.

Mongrel rating: 3/5

Patsy Edis

Episodes: 3630-3648

I've got the theiving mongrel!

Used the old 'con someone into letting you into their house and then robbing you from within'. Patsy befriended Lou and soon became Lolly's babysitter. While Lou thought the sun shone out of young Patsy's arse for her kindness and general willingness to work, and nearly everyone else in the street could not find fault in her, Michelle Scully was left as the only one to have suspisions. She caught her retrieving something from a bin (which they later found out was Lou's pin number). When the money from the Wigs for Kids day charity event was stolen mysteriously from Lou's safe, Michelle suspected Patsy. She was angrily shouted down by Lou for such a suggestion, but three days later she, along with Trevor Jansen her partner in crime, were loading Lou's stuff up into a van, taking money from his account and Patsy also attempted to steal jewellery from Teresa, having just moved in with her. A chance meeting between Tad and Lou at the Coffee Shop made for a mad dash across Erinsborough to try to stop them. Patsy got caught, and was given the 'Why?' question from Lou who seemed to be doing the restraining job instead of the police present (presumably Constable Ralph Walker wasn't avaliable). Patsy was clearly not in the same league as some of the mongrels as she had struck a good rapport with little Lolly and begged Lou not to tell her about Patsy's crimes.

Mongrel rating: 3/5

Megan Townsend

Episodes: about 3334 to 3362

During one of the many gaps in the dodgy Lance and Amy relationship, Lance bags himself a girlfriend called Megan who is similar to Amy in many ways, was in the cool crowd and pressuried Lance into doing things he didn't want to. However there was one distinct difference, Megan dated Lance as part of a bet with her friends. Amy is the first to learn of the bet, overhearing a conversation in the ladies lavs. She had already shown her dislike of Megan which Lance had put down to jealousy so was reluctant to tell him. She told Billy instead and he insists she tells Lance. When the truth finally comes out Lance feels betrayed by all sides, but in true Neighbours style to whole fiasco is forgotten in a matter of days.

Mongrel rating: 2/5

Charlie Thorpe

The devious cow

Episodes: 3410-3437

Charlie first stumbled upon the scene when her dog and Toadie's dog Bob got mixed up. Was this the first part of her evil ploy, to kidnap Bob to get Toadie's attention. Probably not, probably just a coincidence. Anyway she was a student from England and got Toadie involved in the uni's medievil society. Trying desperately to break Sarah and Peter's sixteen calendar days between first meeting and proposal, Charlie proposed to the sap Jarrod after just 14 episodes (which was incidently two days later than Peter and Sarah). Anyway he refused the first time and Toadie waits a further 11 episodes before agreeing. Anyway, as is par for the course for these con-artist types, she was suspected by some of the residents; Namely Joel and Lance who's suspicions were raised by the fact she was so unfriendly to them when Toadie wasn't around. She very nearly costs the lads their friendship and persuades Toadie to move out and live with her. She had originally made up a story about having to get away from Rupert Coburn, as he wasn't treating her well. However Toadie finds a letter implying they are still lovers. Coupled with the fact Charlie admits to Toadie she has visa problems and Toadie finally sees the light and dumps the bint who was presumably stuck on the next plane to Merry old England.

Mongrel rating: 3/5

Russell Butler

Episodes: 1885-1935

The scene was set for Russell to be a bad guy character right from the start. Stephen and Phoebe were looking for a lodger so they had some extra for little Hope and so put up a note at the Coffee Shop. Russell was seen angrily telling someone else who was looking at the note that the position was filled. They went on to let him be the lodger. He is very secretive and spends all day in his room on his computer. Initally it is Phoebe who is suspicious of Russell, she has a look in his room and finds out he used to be a drug addict and was a resident of Elliot Park Rehabilitation Clinic. Stephen and Phoebe are willing to keep him on as they recognise he is trying to come off drugs. Phoebe allows Russell to babysit Hope much to Stephen's annoyance, and Stephen becomes the one most suspicious. However after Russell unexpectedly kisses Phoebe and claims to a door-to-door saleswoman he is Phoebe's husband, there is universal anomosity towards him. Phoebe and Stephen make repeated attempts to evict Russell, failing on each occassion. At the same time there has been a computer virus thwarting Lassiters and manager Phil Martin suspects Russell. Stephen and Lou Carpenter hatch a plan to get some goons to kidnap Russell just to get him away long enough so as they can evict him. However this backfires when Wayne Duncan is inadvertantly kidnapped instead. Russell is finally removed but not after little Hope has been put under significant danger.

Mongrel rating: 4/5

Louise Barker

Episodes: 1880-c2000

Was one of the hard kids in Debbie's year at Erinsborough High. She was seen disrupting class at the time when the utterly annoying Julie Martin had gone back to school to finish High school or some such nonsense. Anyway, Julie told Louise off for disrupting the class leading to Louise telling Julie to "rack off!" The following episode Julie dobbed Louise and her friends in for smoking. This time Louise went further and in possibly the best story line in Neighbours, flushed Julie's head down the toilet. Julie tries to be a do-gooder over the situation and believes Louise is like she is because she lacks a positive role model. This leads her to be tricked into buying Louise and her friends lots of food at the coffee shop. Debbie is pushed by Louise in a netball match causing her to sprain her ankle. Julie who comes on in her place, reverts to her usual anger and ends up getting her own back by pretending to be pushed over in a netball match, causing Louise to be sent off. She later became one of Cody, Debbie, Stonefish, Danni and Mal's friends and accompanied them along with Squirrel and Handy Sam on the ill fated beach house holiday.

Mongrel rating: 3/5

Cecile Bliss

Episodes: about 3454-3562, 3891, c4050-present

Picture the scene; Michelle Scully has only recently come to Erinsborough and is finding it difficult to make friends. When Joel becomes a local celebrity through his naked picture in Dominator Sports Calendar Michelle sees this as an oppurtunity to increase her popularity. She persuades her new friends one of whom is Cecile Bliss, that she knows Joel. She then goes further and says she can get them a date with him. In order to get Joel to agree she pretends Cecile has a dying relative or some such bunk. Anyway the scam is uncovered and Cecile feels betrayed so she then starts to bully Michelle - including making abusive phone calls to her as well as giving her a hard time at school. The situation reaches a climax after Joe Scully gives Michelle a pep talk about standing up to bullies, this leads to Michelle pushing Cecile causing her a broken arm. This causes Michelle to be suspended for the final couple of days of term. The fuss Magda, Cecile's mum made also led to tensions between Lyn and her boss Tanya as well as between the Scullys and Kennedys. Eventually Michelle makes a stand asking her friends if they really enjoy the way Cecile manipulates them, leading to Bianca Nugent becoming Michelle's friend. Subsequently Cecile causes Michelle yet more grief by dobbing her in over the chocolate bar scam her and Bianca tried to pull. Then 18 months or so later her bitchy comment in the ladies lavs at the Erinsborough High society about Zak, Michelle's boyfriend, only being with her as a joke cause Michelle to cry.
Roll on another year or so and Cecile is back. Finally she is confirmed as Dee's sister, and Cecile has now befriended the boisterous Boyd in order to save a poor fox from being destroyed. Most recently she was Dee's family's only representive at both her wedding and funeral. Needless to say this is doing nothing for her mongrel rating.

Mongrel rating: 1/5

Kris 'Nuts' Bennett

Episode: 3655

When Paul went to the Dingoes Aussie Footie training camp, he found that all the other boys seemed to be older than he was and they gave him a hard time from the outset. The only speaking protaganist was one Kris Bennett, nicknamed Nuts. After telling him which position he played Nuts told Paul he would have to find another position as that was the one he played. He also only refered to Paul as 'McClain'. Following a 5k run where Paul challenged him to the line, Nuts claimed he had a bad ankle and then proceeded to purposefully barge into Paul whenever he walked past. The real felonies came at the team-bonding social that evening. Coach Pat Miller had expressively stated that no alcohol should be consumed by the under 18s and the rest would be wise not to do so either. In the event Paul was the only one not drinking beer, and he was called a woss for not doing so. Some chicks entered the bar and Nuts suggested Paul chat them up, Paul refused so Nuts took him for a quiet and possibly sincere chat and Paul then said he'd have a go but chickened out at the last minute to the chants of 'Woss! Woss! Woss!' This led Paul to run away from footie camp and the Dingoes not to return for a couple of months.

Mongrel rating: 2/5

Desie Grant

Episodes: about 3382-3434

Daughter of the annoying but by no means sinister Portia Grant, who gave Madge hours of grief when Portia ran the Grey Growlers old womens basketball team. In order to annoy Madge further she set up Grease Monkeys and left Desie in charge of the day to day running. The new restuarant directly stole a large number of customers from the coffee shop, and Madge and Harold were running at a loss. Tad Reeves decided he wanted a job at Grease Monkeys but Desie turned out to be a real slave driver. Tad's school work started to deteriorate as a result but Desie threatened to sack Tad if he wasn't willing to work on her terms. In the end it fell to the street's investigative journo Libby Kennedy to sort old Desie out. She dressed, unconvincingly, as if she was under 18 and gets the job of Assistant Manager. Despite Libby not publishing her article Grease Monkeys is forced to close down, and Desie is never seen again.

Mongrel rating: 1/5

Bob Landers

Episodes: probably before 1100, 1578-1592, 1713-1737

The criminal father of Todd and Katie Landers. When Josh Anderson said, 'You mongrel Landers!' He was actually referring to Todd who had been seeing his girlfriend Cody or Melissa, behind his back. It would have been more apt if he had called Bob the mongrel (and I don't mean Sarah's dog!) Todd and Katie had to live with the Robinsons while Bob and Annette Landers' marriage was going through a rough patch. When he returns for Katie's birthday he causes trouble and ends up getting arrested, accussing Todd of turning him in. Shortly before Todd's death Bob is visited by his son in prison. Bob is against Todd's plans to marry Phoebe. At Todd's funeral, Bob who was allowed to attend, escapes from the guards and takes Helen hostage. After Helen confronts his motives, Todd's death has driven him over the edge, he drops her off in the middle of the bush, eventually being saved when by chance Hannah Martin spots her. A week or so later he returns as a fugitive and breaks into Phoebe's house. He holds her at gunpoint, the cops arrive and he is put back behind bars.

Mongrel rating: 4/5

Fiona Hartman

Episodes: 1836-1907

Mother of Annalise (and presumably Joanne as well), when she first appeared Lou Carpenter was dating Annalise unaware of her age. Annalise believed her dad was dead but then found the shredded up divorce papers and realised Fiona had decieved her about this. Later Helen Daniels is suspicious that Jim Robinson is getting involved with Jill Weir the woman who nearly wrecked the Willis' marriage. However it turns out it was Fiona Hartman who he was seeing. Julie and Helen don't approve of the relationship and Jim's stress levels are greatly increased by the bickering that results. Helen goes on holiday to Brisbane and then stays in the Martin's house when they return. Jim persuades Fiona to tell Annalise where her father is. Fiona turns down the oppurtunity to live with Annalise to live with Jim instead. Fiona and Jim decide to go into business together, Fiona is a hairdresser by trade and Jim agrees to buy a salon for her. Fiona starts to snoop around his financial papers. She also sells some of Jim's shares without his permission. In the end Jim is beginning to come round and attempts to reconcile with Helen and Julie, however soon after he dies of a heart attack. It is Fiona who finds him, after some intial shock she goes and ensures Jim's will amendments are posted, she then lets Rosemary Daniels in and pretends to be shocked when she finds his dead body. Julie ends up attacking Fiona. When the contents of the will are disclosed Fiona is suspected of foul play and so flees Erinsborough.

Mongrel rating: 3/5

Ed Frampton

Episodes: 1902-1903

One of the extensive community of homeless youngsters in Sydney, he was an acquaintance of Michael Martin. Debbie Martin had gone to Sydney to look for Michael who'd run away. She had been with Rick but they'd split up to cover more ground. At an amusement arcade Debbie is approached by bandana clad Ed who calls her darling. When she tells him to go away she is dragged off against her will. She starts crying and then Michael comes to the rescue and threatens to dob Ed into the police since he was on probation. This does the trick, Ed goes away and Debbie and Michael are free to be reunited.

Mongrel rating: 2/5

Barabbas


Barabbas

Episodes: 2033-2034

If you're in any doubt this guy is a mongrel, the proof surely comes from Lou Carpenter who called him a mongrel in episode 2034. Barabbas was the head of a cult that Lou's daughter Lauren found herself drawn into when she was befriended by Ruth and Jacob who were already members. She eventually went to become a live-in Barabbarian. However Barabbas made sexual advances on her and she fleed for her life. Lou and Brad go out to get her back and save her from Barabbas. He got away with just being called a mongrel and was then able to run his cult in peace.

Mongrel rating: 3/5

Mitch and Reedie

Episode: 2136

Little Hannah Martin had a bit of a crush on young Jessie O'Connor. They had just become friends again and Jessie had arranged to come round to see Hannah's war medals. Unfortunately on the way to Hannah's Jessie had come into contact with Mitch and Reedie some boys from school. They called Jessie a girl for hanging around with girls and pushed him around. In order to prove he wasn't 'a girl' he was made to go to Hannah's and through a water balloon in her face, leaving her humilated on her front doorstep and driving her to truant from school for a time. These guys were truely small fry.

Mongrel rating: 2/5

Brendan Bell

Episodes: 3448-3563

When the dull new teacher Teresa Bell arrived, many wondered why she was often upset, Tad thought it was due to his misbehaviour in class. However it all became clear when she arrived at Susan's house with an injury to the face. Her lawyer husband Brendan was a wife beater. Tess moved out, having to get her stuff while Brendan was out, and moved into Number 32 initially with Anne, and then with fellow teacher Daniel Fitzgerald. Brendan stalks Tess begging her to come back but she is initially resistant. However, Brendan agrees to go on a course in anger management and in Tess's eyes he does seem to be a changed man. However, following the typical Neighbours formula, an incident involving Paul accidently riding into Brendan on the street causes him to go into a rage and everyone except Tess starting to have their doubts. Tess however is recalcitrant and the scene looks set for them to get back together. However, one evening Tess goes out to a club with Daniel as a friend. Brendan goes around to Tess's to find she's not there and Toadie helpfully informs him of her whereabouts. He subsequently flies into a rage, chucking the flowers he'd brought over onto the ground. He then drives like a maniac through Melbourne and his inevitable victims happen to be Stephanie Scully and Libby Kennedy. The result of which is that Libby cannot have children and Steph has a temporary fear of motorcycles. Brendan is also injured and though he's well enough to deny he was driving dangerously to Steph, he dies the following day. Tess though on reflection has to admit she still loved him. Brendan's greatest crime was to cause Libby Kennedy to act irrationally for a full 4 months!

Mongrel Rating: 3/5

Rob McCreedie

Episodes: 3480-3484

Hot shot son of Grease Monkey's founder and tycoon Don McCreedie. Rob attempted to black mail Harold Bishop since it was Rob's job to ensure that Harold didn't bring the Grease Monkey's franchise into disripute through his management of the Erinsborough branch. Rob claims that Harold's opening was the worst he's ever seen and unless Harold pays him a nice little backhander he can kiss his restuarant goodbye. However, Harold after a brief moral dilemma, falls back on his principles and calls Rob's bluff. Something to the effect of, if you dob me in, I'll dob you in type thing. After that Rob goes on his way, presumably to try and blackmail the next jelly belly who's taking over a Grease Monkeys.

Mongrel Rating: 2/5

Chris Tulloch

Mongrel boy Tulloch

Episodes: 3593-3594

Picture the scene; an oppurtunist criminal is having a drink over the road from the Garage, Karl Kennedy has left his nice car with an expensive lap top computer in the back in the hands of an overworked and heartbroken Drew Kirk. Result; Drew allows the car to be stolen by the oppurtunist Chris Tulloch. He proceeds to drive it off and subsequently abandon it, but minus the lap top. Despite calling in the services of Erinsborough's finest, ie. Constable Ralph Walker, Chris is not found to our knowledge. Drew is left offering to pay for the lap-top and Karl is left turning down the offer.

Mongrel Rating: 3/5

Chip Kelly

Episodes: about 2250-2272

Chip was a mate of 'Handy' Sam Kratz who he knew from their involvement in the local Aussie rules footie team. When Sam got a footie injury to his leg he went to a Doctor that Chip recommended and Sam was surprised when he was prescribed steriods and ending up going to the new doctor at the clinic Karl Kennedy. This was the last straw for Karl and he quit his job at the clinic as he had already taken issue at their insistance on prescribing certain brand drugs over others. Sam was feeling a bit down because his main love interest Annalise had announced her engagement to Mark Gottlieb and it didn't help that his other interest Ren Gottlieb started dating Chip. He was even more riled by Chip's sporting prowess. Chip goes to Dr Kennedy with a slight ailment but then gets all shirty when Karl wants to examine him - which bemuses Karl. Then after standing Ren up the day before, Chip invites her over to his place. After she comments on how his flat is more like a gym than a home he launches into a fierce argument with her, turning violent when she tries leave. She just manages to do so without getting assaulted. Sam angrily goes over the day after, to retrive her purse that she dropped on the way out. But again no real violence occurs. The general conclusion in the end is that it was the steriods that were causing the mood swings, but by that time Ren and Sam want nothing to do with him. Plus Ren's experience leads her to pursuade Helen to run self-defence classes. All in all Chip wasn't really bad - it was the drugs.

Mongrel rating: 2/5

Dean Hearn

Episodes: about 3789-3801

For some reason Leo Hancock was pretending to be sick to avoid going to school. His half-brother Matt managed to extract from him that it was due to the substitute gym teacher. When their father Evan got wind of this he decided to have a quite word with the guy in question. Dean Hearn was a latter day Wayne Duncan - he claimed that Leo was just being oversensitive and generally refused to change his behavouir, despite Leo feeling he was being picked on. Then Evan happened to see part of a gym lesson - Dean purposefully pushed Leo to the ground and called him a wimp for not getting up quicker. When Dean saw Evan had seen the incident he pretended to be joking. Evan was having nothing of it and went straight to Susan Kennedy on the matter. Susan being her cautious self consulted Dean for his side of the story and coupled with Leo's change of heart refusal to say he was being bullied - the matter could go no further. A week or so later however, Susan noticed Dean mouthing off at Tad Reeves when Dean accidently walked into him, and he also lost his rag with Susan when she interrupted his lesson to get the store room keys. Dean was now overseeing classroom lessons and Leo was consistantly talking through lessons, having already sent him out the previous day, Dean lost his rag with Leo and ended up throwing the board rubber at Leo, hitting him on the forehead. There was no way around it he was forced to resign and was never seen again.

Mongrel rating: 3/5

Kev Kelly

Episodes: about 3678-

Kev Kelly threatening poor Larry

One day out of the blue Steph hears from Woody, a former boyfriend who'd been sent to prison for a crime he didn't commit. Anyway he'd got himself tangled up with crime baron, jewel theif, Kev Kelly who as far as we know is no relation to Chip. Anyway Woody had to weigh up whether or not to testify against him in court. Despite lots of threats and a bit of a beating by some of Kev's goons, Woody did so. However he was then forced to go onto the witness protection scheme for his own safety, forcing him apart from Steph. However they broke the conditions and secretly met. This however led to Kev Kelly's goons finding out Woody's whereabouts. Kev had broken out of jail and had got his top heavy Barry Burke (presumably no relation of Dorothy) to hijack Woody's car at a garage, which proceeded to explode. Barry died but Larry Woodhouse managed to survive, though he didn't let Steph know until some time later. Anyway Kev remains on the lose and therefore is a pretty top class mongrel - though a true mongrel would do his own dirty work.

Mongrel rating: 4/5

Colin Rogers

Episodes:

Colin first appeared as a harmless geek, reading a large textbook and picking his nose in the corridor at Erinsborough High. Flick had not got around to getting a date for the Deb ball and was getting desperate. She was reduced to asking Colin, but even he had already found someone else. Anyway, eventually Flick got Joel to go with her and a rocky relationship blossomed from it. However, some time later bomb threats and actual small explosions started occuring. One of which unfortunately narrowly missed out on injuring Michelle. Anyway, the prime suspect was problem student Jess Fielding, who had successfully got out of an English presentation through one of the bomb scares. However, it eventually turned out that it was Colin, jealous at Flick's relationship with Joel, who had planted the devices. It is a bit unclear exactly what happened to Colin. One can only assume he was sent to one of Australia's fine penal institutions and the career of perhaps the greatest academic mind to come from Down Under since Professor Huppert was cut short. Anyway, Flick et al quickly got back to life as usual and didn't dwell on it all.

Mongrel rating: 3/5

Coach Pat Miller

Episodes: c3650-

When Paul took up Aussie rules football and found he was pretty good at it the next step was to join up with the elite local Dingoes youth squad which was coached by a one Pat Miller. Paul's dealings with the Dingoes didn't start too well with Kris 'Nuts' Bennett giving Paul a hard time and Pat Miller turning a blind eye and being unsympathetic. However, Pat Miller's real mongrel credentials didn't come to the fore until it became clear that Paul's team mate Nathan is taking steriods and Pat Miller is turning a blind eye/actively encouraging it. After Paul dobs Nathan in to the club's doctor, Karl Kennedy, Pat Miller takes a distinct disliking to him and from then on Paul is permeantly kept on the bench despite being the best player. When he is occassionally let on as a last resort, Pat Miller dismisses his high scoring rate as being down to him being a selfish player. Paul is eventually forced to give up any hope of becoming a professional player and decides to coach kids. However through some string of events Paul does manage to get picked up by the Adelaide Crows. Meantime Pat Miller goes on coaching the Dingoes unaffected. So strangely in this situation, nobody really lost.

Mongrel Rating: 3/5

Dillon Renshaw

Episodes: 2641.

Nobody tells me what to do, no not me!

This young man decided to go along to Chez Chez one afternoon and order a beer. He was served a delightful pint by Debbie Martin who had recently took up the post of barmaid to pay her way through uni. Dillon, though quite obviously a man of youth, did sport quite an impressive amount of facial hair, so Debbie didn't hesitate for a second to serve the man a beer. Dillon spent quite a considerable length of time in the bar and got onto chatting Debbie up and asking her on a date - which she declined. However unknown to Debbie, Dillon is underage. So obviously moments later, in stride the Erinsborough police for a coincidental random check for drinker's ID and it soon emerges that infact Dillon is only 17, and his birthday is a full 6 weeks away. Needless to say this gets Debbie into a great deal of hot water, with Lou and Cheryl's license being put in danger. Meantime, all Dillon gets is a mild ticking off.
Under normal circumstances no one this crap would get on this page, however Dillon was played by none other than Jason Torrens aka Pugwall. Incidently its hardly surprising Debbie thought he was over 18, he was nearly 21 when the scene was filmed.

Mongrel Rating: 1/5

Jonathon Verne

Episodes:

This apparently down to earth chap arrived on the scene just when Stuart Parker, Taj Coppin and Toadie's lives were all a little worse for wear. Jonathon somehow managed to pursuade Stuart and Taj that a series of dodgy car metaphors was the way to a better life. After much pressure and a talk from Susan, Taj decided to give up. However Stuart continued on and was drawn further and further in, becoming a speaker himself and quickly appointed Life Mechanics head for the state of Victoria. It had however become clear to him that Jonathon had devised a method of using plants in talks to give huge donations to encourage others to do the same. Stuart had initially been uncomfortable with the idea but eventually went along. Unfortunately a journalist whom Stuart assumed Toadie had tipped off, uncovered the Life Mechanics scam, by which stage Jonathon had legged it. Stuart avoided criminal proceedings though, only suffering having to live in Taj's uncle's caravan park and being unable to get his job back off Lou. However it eventually pursuaded him to become a cop so Jonathon's influence wasn't that bad.

Mongrel Rating: 2/5

Coming Soon...

After previously commenting on the lack of mongrels, it now seems there's a whole host of them. In particular the evil Gus and mafia Rocco. We'll have to wait till their storylines are complete before they are included.

Do you have a Neighbours villian to nominate (no not mongrels like Bob the dog, Holly, T-Rex or Bouncer!). If so email teabagteasdale@yahoo.co.uk preferably with reasons why they were a menace. Remember only short-term residents or non-residents of Ramsay Street count. So Michael Martin and Darren Stark despite their criminal pasts or some other major character aren't really suitable. They can be as obscure as you like, but try and get their name and about what time in the series they appeared (roughly will do).

Expect more mongrels soon!

Other excellent sources of mindless Neighbours trivia:

Erinsborough.com The definitive Neighbours website

Neighbours Worldwide: Featuring short summaries of (nearly) every episode in existence.

Last updated: 7/5/04