That's my new car, anyone up for a drag..?Hugh, fatty?Are you?

This is a story of a day in Vladdy's life, illustraited with Fallout pictures.  These stories are supposed to be read in a heavy russian accent.

So, anyway, one day, Dan Kibblesmith and I were having dinner at my place, and i was preparing mushrooms... while saying "Dat's a spiiiceey meeatball" repeatedly. Dan started to get p*ssed off... so he yelled at me... So there was nothing left to do, I put poison in the mushrooms, and Dan, being the lover of all foods, ateted them all without even suspecting anything... I waited and waited... BUT HE JUST WOULD'T DIE!!! ...

I couldn't stand it anymore, so when he wasn't looking, I picked up the kitchen knife, and SLLLAM! Right in the kisser! (His back) As I did it, a picture of me fell out of his inside coat poket... AND I DIDN'T FEEL A SLIGHT BIT OF REMORCE... In fact I kept kicking him after his "unfortunate" demise, uuuughha ha ha ha aaaahguuuah ha ha ha!!! I later went to his funeral and paid my final respects by shooting the casket repeatedly... It was the best birthday I ever had.

After everyone left, I put on a mask, and dug him up, just to get his class ring and 5 golden teeth, I also used his skull to decorate my locker at school, pretty cool hugh? OOOOHHH YEEAH! HARDCORE, BABY!!! But there still wasn't enough to subdue my grave-cleptomanija...

I went to his house, when everyone was eather at school ... or at work, and stole everything!!! Even the gigantic grandfather's clock, that i managed to fit into my backpack. All this still, just couln't tame my distructive intentions and stuff... So I had an even better idea...

I mixed me up a nice vodka marini, shaken, not stirred, got myself a chair, and enjoyed it in the middle of the burning rubble... of his house... cause I burned it down, see... that was my great idea...   And thats the story of how I gained the freedom to say "Thaats a spiiiceey meaaatball" whenever I damn well pleased.

THE END

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