Gidget and Gordo

After the unfortunate death of the Queen Mother on 8 January 1999, the throne needed an heir. After a long and tumultuous search, involving espionage and intrigue (along copious amounts of alcohol, for fortification purposes), the heirs took their rightful places as rulers of the musical kingdom.

Gidget

Not much is known about the origins of the new Queen. Nonetheless, rumors abound that she descended from an affair between U.S. Congress member J. C. Watts (R-Oklahoma) and a cloven-hooved, fork-tailed demon. The demon in question, however, categorically denied that it would ever have sex with Representative Watts.

Gidget [Siam]: girl and midget.
Known aliases: TLG (Tiny Little Gidget)

Gordo

Leroy Gordon Cooper, 3rd.
Father: Leroy Gordon Cooper, Jr., Colonel, USAF (Retired), Astronaut.
Mother: Unknown [Jane Doe]
According to his autobiography, This Sleepy Life, Gordo stated "After my mother birthed me, she found herself unable to handle the stresses of motherhood. This stress forced her to run away not long after I gained an understanding of the world around me. Fortunately, dad was there to take care of me. Even though he didn't choose me, he still loved me."
Asked about Gordo's mother, Col. Cooper (Ret.) stated that she was a poor, young creature who sought shelter. He emphatically denied any possibility that the mother might have been the same demon who had an affair with G. Gordon Liddy (one of the players involved in the Watergate break-in).
Approximately four years after the bombing of the Alfred P. Murrah Federal building, the Washington Post published excerpts from the book, A Conspiracy of Murder. The anonymous author made serious allegations about Colonel Cooper being "John Doe #2." The author justified this damning charge of murder by giving evidence that showed "[Col. Cooper] knew that [Jane Doe] was in the Murrah Federal building that morning." The author stated [Col. Cooper] wanted to ensure that, "[Gordo's] path to the throne was finally clear of the impediment that [Jane Doe] represented."

Known aliases: G. Gordo Liddy, Notorious B.F.G. (Big Fat Gordo)

Photos

From the gracious royal house, we present photos.

Photo copyright Bob Jarvis.

(the man pictured is one of the royal house's underlings)
Photo copyright Doug McClellan.

One of the paparazzi broke into the compound and was able to get this photo of Gordo and Gidget. Unfortunately for the photographer, Gordo's evil red eyes and Gidget's upturned tail combined to give off a laser beam that caused the intruder to suffer an aneurysm. Since the regrettable incident, the paparazzi have been content to photograph the duo at appointed times.

Updated on 10 October 2001
Page copyright, 1999-2001, Easter Cat, eastercat_at_yahoo.com.
Photos copyright of their respective artists.

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