1. You've passed out from drinking alone in your apartment, and everyone knows about it.

2. You can't remember your last shower.

3. Your love life consists of the Internet and private chat rooms with "Hotlips".

4. You know that you can get your computer checked out by three people in CIS (Computer Information Systems) and three people who think they know what the CIS people are talking about.

5. Cleaning your apartment consists of going floor to floor looking for Windex, Ajax, Mr Clean and sponges.

6. Using the payphone in the hallway is the only privacy left.

7. When the phone rings and its for someone who is living downstairs and using your phone for emergencies (which is usually 3 or 4 people).

8. You get to the point that the loud music coming from upstairs puts you to sleep at night.

9. You leave for the weekend and leave the front door unlocked, so that half of the building can use your microwave, phone or bathroom.

10. You wake up in the morning, the living room is dark and you hear "hello" coming from the couch.

11. You have more boxes of Kraft Dinner in your cupboard then any other type of food (or if you have more boxes than all your roommates).

12. You meet someone for the first time as you are moving out of the building at the end of the year.

13. The word gets out that Pete (Guy in charge of Rez) is coming for a visit and students make plans to hide their pets.

14. You use your room as a storage room to live with your boyfriend/girlfriend across the hall or in Lennoxville so that your parents don't get suspicious.

15. You know the delivery guy on a first name basis.

16. People come to visit, just to use your restaurant menus.

17. You have at least 2 restaurant numbers on speed dial.

18. You can't remember the last time you changed socks or did your laundry.

19. You can't count on your fingers and toes how many times you've skipped class.

20. You have used every excuse in the book not to go home on weekends.

21. You look forward to evenings, so you can study... bottle caps and beer labels.

22. You sit around with five other people and make up new types of Barbie dolls. (Ie. PMS Barbie and stressed out Ken. Divorce Barbie (Lawyer and papers included.))

23. You get bored of watching the same 5 TV channels (two of which are in French).

24. Breakfast consists of cold pizza, chips and cereal drowned in beer (even if the is milk in the fridge).

25. There are contests at the end of the year to see which apartment has the grossest molds in the fridge (or cupboard).

26. You try to make cheese out of expired milk.

27. You shave your head at least four times a year.

28. You finish cooking noodles and there is a white film from the hard water.

29. You keep food reserves in other apartments or under your bed, so your roommates don't eat all.

30. People come to use your bathroom, because others have puked in theirs.

31. Sleeping consists of afternoon naps.

32. Strangers come in to watch movies in your apartment.

33. You e-mail your parents to get news.

34. You get up early to go downstairs and steal (or borrow) The Gazette.

35. You can burp your own name (without being drunk).

36. You shave your head to save on shampoo, conditioner and combs.

37. You sleep through the fire drill, thinking its either the vacuum or an alarm clock.

38. Your only ambition is to be re-accepted back into Rez.

39. You keep getting calls for the people who used to live in your apartment.

40. The only way to get a date is to use the Hushpuppy service.

41. Your roommate sets you up with the cute guy/girl from upstairs.

42. If you want the apartment to yourself, you need to put up a 48 hour notice.

43. You can understand the words to the music coming from above or below you.

44. You develop the Rez Syndrome. (You stay at Rez and miss home, you go home and miss Rez.)

45. You have more people than chairs.

46. Most poster on the walls are of beer or are drinking related.

47. Your car is almost older than you but it's the only one that starts at -40C.

48. You live in Sawyer and park in Laurier because there is no room in your own parking lot.

49. Your overnight guest lives on the couch and leaves a body print in the pillows.

50. The only way to keep the student inside the apartment is to put screws in the screens.

51. You put your deposit down to pay for the future damages.

52. You can predict the fire drill because the thermometer registers -5C in October.

53. You've stayed at Rez more than you go to school.

54. You bring in furniture that matches the carpet and the couch.

55. You clean up your room at the end of the year and see the real color of the carpet.

56. Your only form of enjoyment is screwing up the internal vacuum system for others (ex. Pulling on the plug to change the air pressure).

57. You need more than one hand to count your semesters at Rez.

58. You think that the path (to school) should include an Olympic bobsleds.

59. You taunt others outside who are having a snowball/water fight, just to get the window cleaned.

60. You've been to the bars more than the library.

61. You buy a 4L jar of dill pickles to accommodate the building.

62. Your fridge has more condiments than food.

63. You order out to keep from doing the dishes.

64. You don't need to the TV Guide anymore.

65. You go home and drink your boss and parents (or alcoholic relative) under the table.

66. You know all the words to commercials.

67. You forget to turn the stove on to cook.

68. You know all of the stories your roommate is going to lie about.

69. You plan your schedule around soap operas.

70. Your normal speaking voice is monotone.

71. People understand what your are saying when you speak with one or two syllables.

72. You know where the best parties are, and its only labor day.

73. You break up with your boyfriend/girlfriend and it crushes your mother's heart.

74. Your only weekly reading is the PubliSac.

75. You have a contest to see who has the longest toenails.

76. You put your hard liquor on your roommate's shelf to hide it from your parents.

77. It's a joy just to find laundry money.

78. You can walk the path without your glasses.

79. You go home, call McDonald's to order out and they tell you they don't deliver.

80. You've driven your roommate's car more than he/she has.

81. The only reason some students go to class is because of you and your car.

82. You see Norm Gladu (The Security Guard) more than once a night, and you are on a first name basis.

And lastly.....

83. You can sit down with friends and make up lists about living in Rez.

                                                -Christine Bennet

(84. You know your friend made this list and you borrowed it for your web page.)

                                                -Editor