"I see you, sitting there on your enlarged, cushioned, Cheetos-stuffed ass, counting down the hours until your death. Well, boils and ghouls, I've got something to help you "kill" some time! Check out my evil and equally retarded website! It's filled like marrow in a bone with ghouls, insane murderers, madmen, and (of course) kooky spooky creatures! It's fun for the entire family (and by entire, I mean "half")! So what the devil are you waiting for? Scroll down and check out my insanely insane web domain! Enjoy your stay...because you won't leave...EVER (for maximum effect, please don't press your BACK button)!"
--Stephen Duncan, local asylum escapee |
