The hypnotist

This is the true story of a performance given at my college by hypnotist Thomas Bresadola.

At last, the auditorium had been filled, and the hypnotist walked on stage. Before he began, he joked with us, just like a stand up comedian. He asked who wanted to volunteer, and the hands shot up. He said to wait, and that in just a few minutes, they would get to go up. He said that the people being hypnotized would feel as if they had slept for an entire night's time. He also said that they would remember everything that they did while under the trance. After a while of stand up comedy and explanation of hypnotism, he began to call up the volunteers.

There were 18 seats arranged in an arc across the stage.

"These seven seats here," he said, "are just for ladies." Seven girls came up. Then he called up the guys who wanted to come. He didn't call them up one at a time. Rather, he just let them all run up onto the stage. Two guys wound up sharing half a seat. It was resolved, and one of them gave up. Another guy came up slowly, after all the seats were gone, went backstage, got a chair of his own, and sat down on the end of the row. He was applauded for his ingenuity. Then the Hypnotist began to re-arrange the seating order; alternating between guy and girl in some places, and re arranging guys in other places. He had explained that the key to staying in the trance was hearing his voice. The hypnotist explained, prompted by a person who asked him before the show, that if he died while people were under the trance, they would wake up on their own in a few minutes, or they would fall into a normal sleep state, and wake up a few hours later. He told us to be very quiet while he was putting the volunteers under the trance. He had very relaxing piano music music play. He had all of the volunteers to put their palms face up on their legs. He almost never stopped talking so as to keep them in the trance. He didn't say any of the stuff like "Your eyes are getting heavy."He did tell them to focus on his voice. Next, he told them to take deep breaths and exhale slowly. He said to look up at the ceiling (but not to move their heads up; just their eyes.) He described to them visions that they should imagine. He said that they saw a white square, floating in the air before them. He said that it was growing and stretching. Next, he told them that there was a light flickering on the screen. The man counted down seconds. (He used counting down often.) He said that they could see a movie on the screen. They were told that it was one that they have seen before. Then he told them that somebody was changing the picture, as if it were a TV and somebody was changing the channel. The man told the volunteers that now they saw an "exotic location; an island." He told them that the screen was getting closer and closer, and that they were pressed up against it, and then, they were on the island. He told them about how they could see the sun and the birds. He told them about a cave entrance that they were standing before. He said that it was a very high opening, and that they could feel a cool breeze coming out from the cave. As he said this, he fanned his hand before the faces of the volunteers. He told them that they had entered the cave, and that they felt the gravel and sand beneath their feet. He said that it was a little bit cooler inside of the cave. The man told them that they advanced into the cave, and that the floor began to slope downward. The more it sloped, the more they slipped into the sand and slid downward, deeper into the cave. He suggested that they saw a big white bird fly overhead, and out of the cave. "There it goes, in the distance," he said. Next, he told them that they looked behind them in their minds, and saw the cae entrance growing smaller and smaller. He said that it wasn't that the entrance was shrinking, but that it was going off into the distance. About this time, he sent them all off to sleep. He said that they would want to fall asleep, but they should remain on the edge of sleep.

Around this time, he had eliminated three people from the 18 volunteers. Throughout the show, only about four others came out of their trances. It was a very successful hypnotism.

Still, it was not apparent that people were in a trance. They were sitting there, but they showed no reaction to the stimulus that he had been giving them.

Then, he began to mess with the poor students' minds.

He said that he had a check for "One-THOUSAND dollars!" and that one of the students would recieve it. He told them to raise their hands if they wanted $1,000. A bunch of the volunteers dumbly raised their hands. The hypnotist told them that they were going to the race track to bet on horses. He told them that they were on a bus, and that the bus was very hot. He used a lot of description to tell them how hot the bus was. Some of the volunteers began to fan themselves, or wipe away their percieved sweat. He said that the bus driver put on the AC, and that it was cool again. One of the guys still felt a little hot, however. The hypnotist said that they were now on an airplane, and that the seatbelt light just went on. He told them all to fasten their seat belts. The people, very slowly and dumbly, reached to their sides to fasten invisible seat belts. The hypnotist went over to one of the people and said that he was sitting on the belt of the person next to him. The volunteer slowly and dumbly got up, reached around, and resolved the conflict. Next, the volunteers were told that the pilot was a friend of the hypnotist's, and that they were being allowed to fly the plane. The people reached up into the air in front of themselves and grabbed onto the invisible controls. One guy was reluctant to fly the plane. The hypnotist asked him if he wanted to fly it, and he shook his head no. They were told that a tree was coming; they were going to run into a tree! The "pilots" manuvered around the trees, while the guy who didn't want to pilot drew his hands over his eyes in fear. He said that they were landing soon, but, what was that over there? It was a nudist colony, he said. Several of the guys took out invisible binoculars. Soon, they all landed and were at the racetrack. He gave each student a little slip of paper. He said that they were tickets with the number of one of the horses which they had bet on. He told each student which number ticket they had as he passed them out. One of the guys waved his ticket around proudly. They were told that they would need to cheer loudly if they wanted their horse to win the race. The boy who was really exited about his ticket was dissappointed when he was told that his horse wasn't going to be able to race.

"Oh, wait; the jockey's getting back onto the horse. He's going to race after all."

He guy got up quite happily and waved his ticket some more with a smile on his face.

The hypnotist started the race. The volunteers got up out of their seats and began to cheer loudly to their horses. It was a "photo finish." He had the volunteers sit down. He had to guide one to her seat. He had the audience decide which won. He declared the winner, and the person with that ticket got up and cheered triumphantly. The hypnotist gave him a slip of paper and told him it was the $1,000, which greatly exited the "winner." He gave everybody else a "check" for $200 as consolation, and told them to put the checks in their pockets.

They were told that now, there was a pick pocket coming around. The boy whose horse almost didn't race sat on his side to protect his pocket. Once they had been assured that the thief had left, the hypnotist instructed them all to put the check in a safe place that nobody would look. Several people put the check into their pants. Once all the checks were secured, he told them all that the check was now ice cubes, and they all frantically removed their papers from various hiding places.

Now he told them to forget everything that had happened and to fall into a deep sleep. Everybody drooped over. They were told that now they were driving a sports car, and "boy, did they look GOOD!!" They reached up for their steering wheels, many of them with just one hand, trying to look cool. He told them to open up the sun roof. They reached up and slid back an imaginary sun roof except for one kid, who reached up and began to crank his sun roof open.

"Hey, isn't that somebody you used to date over there?" the hypnotist said.

Several middle fingers went up.

"Hey, now somebody is coming up behind you. He's trying to pass you."

On guy started steering from side to side to keep the other person behind him.

"Oh, he cut you off. We've got some road rage here. And what was that gesture he gave you out the window? Why don't you show him what you think out of you sunroof?"

More middle fingers.

"Isn't that some of your friends over there?" Some of the people waved "hi". The hypnotist told them to pull into a driveway. Everyone began to steer into the driveway. One guy was dreaming very realistically, and he gave his wheel a couple of turns. They were all told to close the sunroof. The one guy reached up for his sunroof crank and began to turn it in the air above him. The hypnotist asked him what model year his car was. The dreaming individual said, very slowly and dumbly, "Niiiiineteen niiinety-twooo."

The hypnotist decided to begin something new. He told them all to sleep. They all relaxed and drooped over again. He told them to forget everything that they had done. They were all told that soon, they would awaken. Next, the hypnotist began to tap people on the shoulder or on the knee, telling them, "This person I'm tapping on the knee, and this person I'm tapping on the shoulder, listen carefully. Each time that I snap my fingers and only I snap my fingers, you will react as if the person to your left is whispering sweet nothings into your ear. You may like it, and if you do, you may tell that person. If you don't like it, you may tell that person, however, you will not hit that person."

The hypnotist went around to the different people, tapping them and giving them rediculous suggestions. He told one boy on the end of the row of seats that he was going to count down thirty seconds in his head, then get up, walk across the stage and ask "When the hell are you going to start the show!" He was told to accept any answer he was given, sit back down and count down from thirty again, get up and ask "When is the show going to begin?" "This could go on forever," the hypnotist told him. The man told another guy that he was a human safety belt, and that when "I and only I" say "safety", he was to lay himself across the lap of the person next to him to keep that person safe. He was told that if he was asked what he was doing, he'd just say he was trying to be safe. He told one person that when asked his name, he would completely forget what his name was. He told another to make up a different name each time he was asked, just to fool the hypnotist. The man suggested so many things that it was hard to keep track of them all but the volunteers all remembered perfectly.

"Nod your head if you understand," the hypnotist told them.

They all slowly and groggily bobbed their heads up and down.

The man told everybody to awaken, which they did. They all sat up and looked around the auditorium. The hypnotist asked them all how they felt. One girl said that she was relaxed, and none of them seemed to realize that they had been hypnotized yet. The hypnotist began to say things to them and to the audience, just to keep his voice going to maintain the trance, and to distract them all. He snapped his fingers as he walked around. Some of the people began to show some interesting reactions. One guy looked over at the guy next to him with a look of bewilderment and disgust, and drew back. The hypnotist went over and asked what was wrong.

"This guy is sayin' shit to me! What's wrong with you, man? I don't like none o' that!"

A girl on the other side of the stage was looking dreamily at the boy next to her. "I really like you, Dan," she said gently.

Meanwhile, one guy kept getting up, tapping the hypnotist on the shoulder and saying "When are you going to start the show?"

"It's going to start in a minute, now go sit down." The hypnotist then began to talk about SAFETY.

One guy promptly got up and sprawled himself across the lap of the person next to him.

"Hey, what's going on here; what are you doing?"

"There was a car coming," he replied.

"Excuse me, when are you going to start the show?"

"In a minute. Comeon, sit down, will you?" He walked down the row. "Hey, what's your name?"

"I don't freakin' know!"

"Hey, how about you; what's your name?"

"Rafngkizm."

After playing with the poor, helpless people, he commanded them to fall back asleep. Again, he told them to forget everything that they had done so far. In the same manner as before, he gave each person new suggestions. Then he had them "wake up", and whenever he said one of the ques he gave them, they began to do absurd things. He did this a couple of times. The final time, he told them to go sit down in the audience again. They all went, except for two people who were certain that they were glued to their seats.

"Why didn't you go sit down?"

"I cant' sit down, my ass it stuck to the seat!"

He apologized a little, but stalled more, and this aggravated the two girls.

"These pants cost me fify dollars!" yelled one of the girls.

"Well, um, well get you a putty knife or something."

The man turned around and began to explain that sometimes "this thing happens," (humoring theentranced people who still didn't realize that they were hypnontized.) "Sometimes in hypnotizm there is this thing where there's this RED light," he said.

One guy shot up from his seat and hurriedly made his way into the isle, certain that the guy next to him was unzipping his fly. The person found another seat next to a girl, and the hypnotist resumed. The man mentioned the color "blue." At this, the same guy got up and began to loudly express his dissatisfaction with the show.

"Man, this show STINKS! What the heck is this, man?" He stormed infront of the stage, picked up a wad of paper and threw it at the man. "You suck!," he shouted." He returned to his seat. He was just about to sit down when the hypnotist mentioned the color "green." At this, the same guy got up with a big smile on his face, walked in front of the stage and told us all how great the show was. "Man, this show is the SHIT!" he cheered. He sat back down, and the hypnotist mentioned the color red again. The guy began to stroke the hair of the girl next to him affectionately with a big smile on his face.

"Anyway, I'm glad to be here at ALFRED," the hypnotist said.

The volunteers got up out of their seats and yelled, "BINGO!" Then they all realized that they hadn't won a prize (they were told that this would happen), except for one guy (the one who wanted to know when the show would start) who went up to the hypnotist with an invisible bingo card and insisted that he had bingo.

"Look at this, I have B14, 6, 12, 19!"

"I'm sorry, I, I don't have any prizes."

"No! Look at the card." He gestured across his "card" to show his "bingo."

"Look, I don't see any card," said the hypnotist. The guy returned dissapointedly to his seat.

The hypnotist began to snap his fingers. One of the entranced people excitedly got up from his seat to volunteer for the show.

"I'm sorry, I'll take volunteers in a little while. Why don't you go back to your seat?"

The man played with these volunteers a couple of times, as well as with the others who had absurd post-hypnotic suggestions implanted in thier minds.

The show was drawing to a close, so he told the entranced volunteers to sleep. They all drooped over again. He said that soon, they would awaken from their trance after the count of ten. (You see, at the beginning of the hypnotism, he gave them the suggestion that they would awaken after the count of ten.) But first, he told them all that when they awoke, for five minutes, they would not remember that the hypnotist did anything except for card tricks. He then went around to each person and tapped them, telling them some silly thing that they would remember for a few minutes.

All of the volunteers regained full conciousness. However, they still had suggestions planted in their minds. One guy got up looking for girls to introduce to his friends.

"Hey, you wanna meet some guys? Hey, what's your name? Amanda? Here, come meet my friend..."

One guy was certain that he had met the girl of his dreams, but forgot to get her name or number. He went around desperately asking people if they knew who she was or where she was. When one person told him where she was, he went running out of the auditorium to find her.

A girl in the front got up and began to teach the people around her the latest dance moves that she thought she had learned from the hypnotist.

The "red, blue, green" guy shot up from his seat, snapped to attention, and saluted each time the person sitting next to him snapped his fingers.

In a little while, they all came to thier senses, and the show was over. People began to leave, and at the door, all the volunteers were being teased by their friends.

And that was that, except for the fact that I was still laughing this morning when I got up.