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Steven's Story
It was ten years ago, on 9 May 2005, ten years since my life changed, for ever, because of the HIV virus, and the man I am today, is a much wiser, caring and more sensitive man, than I was on 8 May 1995.
During the past decade, my life has gone through numerous transformations, as a direct result of being infected with the HIV virus, the most significant of these was, my attempted suicide in late 1998.
The three years prior to my suicide attempt, were racked with denial and depression, something that comes hand in hand with the HIV virus, and a cannibus dependency.
As I had been engaging in sex with men since the early 80's, and as HIV was still something not many people knew very much about, I never really thought I was at risk, big mistake. The only excuse for my becoming infected, was ignorance, on my part, pure and simple, IGNORANCE.
In early 1999, I started Living with my HIV, and developed a personal philosophy along the way, over time. After loosing friends, and one very special man in particular, this philosophy developed - "when it comes to HIV, education, is the best prevention'.
So, now, upon entering my second decade, of living with this dispicable plague on humanity, I say to you right here and now - do the best thing you will EVER do for yourself, your family and friends, who in turn became affected by HIV - DO NOT take unneccessary risks when it comes to sex - there is nothing wrong in giving yourself over to pleasure, the trick is, to make sure that that pleasure doesn't haunt you for the rest of your life.
A new philosophy, born of meeting some people in the USA, also involved in HIV prevention education, and it is as simple as this - 'HIV Stops WITH ME', please don't make the mistake I made, by letting ignorance run a muck, get educated, there is not excure for IGNORANCE about HIV virus.
My complete story is at My Story
Steven - 16 May 2005
Stu's Story
It's almost 20 years since I walked out of my doctor's office with the news I tested positive to exposure to the HIV virus. I have no idea where I caught it. I was 20 years old and sexually active with many partners. Looking back I see there was no way I could be warned. We had only just learned about the existance of the virus and had thought up until that point that this illness was GRID (Gay Related Immunodeficiency Disease) which had been spreading in New York and San Francisco. I had not been having sex with men from San Francisco or New York and thought that I wasn't at risk. WRONG!!!
Back in those days we had no way of combatting the virus and I was given 18 months tops to live. Ouch! I went into a tailspin immediately. My career was up the creek, I felt like a leper and I became very depressed, drinking heavily and behaving like there was no tomorrow (well, not many of them anyway). I tried to stay at work but news about stress leading HIV positive people to an early death forced me to reconsider that. After 8 months I left my job and went on sickness benefits. My family were very supportive and we all muddled through the next few years together. I was lucky that my family were so openminded about it. Many people with HIV are not so lucky.
In the last 20 years there have been issues with certain diseases (lung conditions in my case) and depression (from having my life uprooted) but I have managed to remain fairly healthy and reasonably happy.
About 8 years ago I started on HAART (Highly Active Anti-Retroviral Therapy) and whilst the side effects have been pretty awful, I'm holding on and getting healthier with every passing year.
HIV isn't funny. It strikes you in terrible places. From the fear of an early death to the stigma this disease carries in the general community, it has the potential to completely stuff up your life in ways you wouldn't imagine. I'm aware that HIV is no longer necessarily fatal but I wouldn't wish it on any other soul. You don't have to be queer or on the fringe to make contact with it. It can happen to anyone. Please don't let it happen to you.
- Stu 14/5/05
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