I Won't Say [I'm in Love]

By Mae

[Percy walks into blank hallway. No one around. He looks around. No one around. He takes a breath.]

Percy: If there's a prize for rotten judgement,

I guess I've already won that

No man is worth the aggravation

That's ancient history been there done that!

[Fred and George enter scene. They see Percy. They hear Percy. Percy does not see them. He does not hear them. They join in the song without Percy knowing]

Fred + George: Who'd you think you're kidding?

He's the earth and heaven to you

Percy : Ohhhh….

Fred: Try to keep it hidden

Honey, we can see right through you

George: Boy, you can't conceal it,

We know how you feel and who you're thinking offffffffff…

[Percy launches right into it, singing passionately]

Percy: Ohhh…

No chance, no way

I won't say it, no no…

[Hermione, Harry and Ron makes an entrance, and joins in with the Weasly twins]

Hermione and the twins: You swooooon, you siiigh

Harry + Ron: Why deny it, oh ohhh….

[Percy wrings his hands in the air]

Percy: It's too cliché,

I won't say I'm in loooooove…."

[Professor McGongall walks in surprised, but joins in as well]

Hermione, twins, Harry, Ron + Professor McGongall: Ooo…

[Percy looks down sadly and sweetly]

Percy: I thought my heart had learnt its lesson

It feels so good when you start out

My head is screaming, "Get A GRIP, Boy!"

Unless you're dying to cry your heart out, ohhhh…."

[Snape and Hagrid pop in. Hagrid joins in heartily, and Snape, against his better judgement, joins in too]

Hermione + Twins: You keep on denying

Who you are and how you're feeling

Harry + Ron: Baby, we're not buying

Hon, we saw you hit the ceiling

Snape, Hagrid + Professor McGongall: Face it like a grown up

When you gotta own up

All except Percy: That you got, got, got it baaaadddd…

Percy: Ohhh….

[The quidditch captain has shown up, and he's enjoying the way Percy looks, and of course the fact that he's singing for him. He leans against the wall and left everyone go on singing. Dumbledore stumbles into scene and joins in cheerfully, waiting for his cue]

Percy: No chance, no way

I won't say it, no no

[Penelope comes in angrily. She opens her mouth to shout, then all the prefects in the school trample over her to see one of the most serious prefect sing a love song. She struggles up, tries to yell again but the whole quidditch team including reserves and trainees tramples over her to see their captain's reactions]

Penelope: Urggggg…

Hermione, Twins, Harry, Ron, Snape, Hagrid, Professor McGongall, Dumbledore, the Quidditch Team + Prefects: Give up, give in

Dumbledore: Check the grin, you're in love!

[Percy blushes]

Percy: This scene, won't play

I won't say I'm in love…

[The whole school is shaking with song. The animals outside wonder what in the world is going on]

Hermione, Twins, Harry, Ron, Snape, Hagrid, Professor McGongall, Dumbledore, the Quidditch Team + Prefects: You're doing flips,

Read our lips, you're in love!!!

[Percy looks irritated at the fact that they had cut in on his 'loveeeee….' part, but he goes on]

Percy: You're way off base, I won't say it

Get off my case, I won't say it

Hermione, Twins, Harry, Ron, Snape, Hagrid, Professor McGongall, Dumbledore, the Quidditch Team + Prefects: Boy, don't be proud,

It's okay, you're in love…

[This note is was the envy of all the girls who wanted to become singers…]

Percy: Ohhhhhhhhh….

At least, out loud

I won't say I'm in looove…

Hermione, Twins, Harry, Ron, Snape, Hagrid, Professor McGongall, Dumbledore, the Quidditch Team + Prefects: Shalalalalalalaaa…

[A single clapping sound comes from the corner. Percy turns and, and freaks out at the people shalalala-ing. He recognises that person in the corner]

Percy: Oliver!

Wood: You sing quite well.

Percy: …

Wood: Well, Percy, I think you're quite cute.

Percy: Oh! Really?

[Wood nods and bends down to kiss him. The whole hall claps.]

Everyone but Wood and Percy: Awwww….

[In the background, a shadow stands there. Her eyes glow]

Penelope: Wood, Percy…Just you wait…