NYPD Blue Fanfiction
Tina's Fanfic
Never Been In Love Before
(An Alternate Andy and
Connie Ending to “Low Blow”)
By: Tina
Rated: PG
I’d like to dedicate this story to “The
Gutter Gang”. You know who you are!!! This story follows the events that take
place during the Season 9 episode “Low Blow” and give us a sense of what
might have happened between Andy and Connie after Junior’s big knockout of
Laughlin!
No doubt, as you may remember at the
beginning of the episode Connie calls off the Disney trip because Andy is
“anxious” about people in the squad knowing that they’re going to Disney
World together. To quote our beloved Sip from the episode “gossip is like a
sport around here.”
This fanfic is for those of you who’ve
always wondered what happened between Andy and Connie that same night after
Junior won the boxing match.
Enjoy!
Your VP
I’ve never been in love before.
Not like this…you taught me more.
All about myself.
When I lived upon a shelf and cried.
Cause I thought I could not give.
My pride would not let me live.
All my feelings disappeared.
You are the lovely reason I am alive.
You satisfy all my senses and you give me
The confidence to grow.
In a thousand different ways.
Happy just to spend the days of my lifetime
By your side.
I want to be everything that I can.
I want so much to be more of a man.
I want to grow.
I want to know you better.
Each day I’ll try to love you…
Cause I’ve never been in love before.
You have a friend for life in me.
If we ever disagree.
If you have to go away.
I will set you free with joy.
“Cause your happiness is mine.
May our life forever shine.
May you always be a friend.
I wan to be everything that I can.
I want so much to be more of a man.
I want to live.
I want to give my lifetime.
Each day I’ll try to love you
Cause I’ve never been in love before.
Connie McDowell was seeing red!!! Just
now he hushed her in front of Junior. That really got her going. “Not this
shit again.” Connie thought to herself. John already knows for crying out
loud. Maybe it’s time to give Andy a wake up call.
Connie: You got a minute??
Andy: (clearing his throat) Ahhh, we got
this guy in the pokey.
Connie: (to Junior): Hey…when you’re
off the phone, we’re in the coffee room.
(Connie walks directly into the coffee
room waiting for Andy to follow her.)
(In the coffee room)
Connie:
“Yeah.” “I did some research online which I think I’ll pass on. But as
far as booking a flight for myself…Andy, I don’t think I should.
Andy: What are you talking about?
Connie: Well, I’m getting the sense
you’re embarrassed by having me come to Florida.
Andy: No.
C: You won’t talk about it and then
when I try to, you hush me in front of people who already know.
(Andy walks over and closes the door to
the coffee room.)
Andy: “I just don’t think we need to
broadcast it, you know?? I mean gossip is like a sport around here.”
Connie: “Well, you realize if we take
the same vacation time, people are gonna figure it out.”
Andy: “That doesn’t have to be the
case.”
Connie: “Andy, I’m…I’m just
getting the strong sense this isn’t a great idea.”
Andy: “If you backed out, I don’t
think you understand how disappointed Theo would be.”
Connie: The minute Theo steps on his
first airplane he’ll forget I’m not there.
Andy: Nah…he talks about you all the
time. The rides he wants to take you on…
Connie: “Theo’s only part of the
reason I agreed to go.”
Andy: Look you gotta know it’s got nothing to do with being embarrassed.
A guy’d be nuts bein’ embarrassed
bein’ with you. It’s just that it’s more complicated
than that.
Connie: “Well, I don’t want to
complicate things for you.
Andy: Look, Connie…
Connie: “It’s off and it’s fine.
Go talk to your suspect.”
Way to go, Sipowicz! Andy thought to
himself. You have just screwed up one of the best friendships you’ve ever
made.
Andy:
“You mind if I sit here??”
Andy would be lucky if she didn’t take
the popcorn she was eating and toss the entire bucket over his head. She hates
me he thought.
Connie: “I reserved it for a friend of
mine.”
(as she smiled up at him and ate another
handful of popcorn.)
Andy: “ Thanks.”
Her anger from earlier in the day seemed
to have subsided. They watched the fight together and cheered Junior on.
Junior knocked the crap out of Laughlin. He
delivered a punishing blow that sent him to the floor. The referee put Laughlin
down for the count…1…2…3….
Connie: Yes!!!!
Andy: All right, Junior!!!
Connie, in her excitement, reached over and
hugged Andy. Andy thought to himself. Maybe she doesn’t hate me.
Everyone
was busy congratulating Junior on his victory. Greg and Baldwin bought a round
for everyone in the squad including the champ.
Greg: There we go…7 beers and 1 ginger
ale.
Baldwin: To John…pride of the 15th
Detective Squad!!!
Everyone: Here…Here!!!
They sat around for about an hour enjoying
the commaradiere and finishing their beers.
Andy got up to leave. He needed to get
home. He’d left Theo with a sitter tonight so he could go to the fight.
Andy: “Well, I’d better get going.”
Connie: “C’mon…don’t leave. Theo
will be okay. Stay just a little bit longer.”
Andy: “Nah, I really better get going.”
Connie: “How about I come with you?”
Andy: “You need a ride home?”
Connie: “You asking me?”
Andy: “Only if you say yes.”
Connie: “Then let’s blow this joint.”
As they walked down the street, Andy walked
next to her. Andy cleared his throat and asked her “You hungry?” You want to
get a bite to eat…a cup of coffee or something?”
“Yeah…that sounds good. All that
hollering made me work up an appetite.”
Andy noted the optimistic tone of her
voice. Maybe it was just wishful thinking on his part. They got in Andy’s car.
Andy turned to Connie.
“Can I tell you something before we
go?”
“Sure.”
Connie…I’m sorry about this
morning…in the coffee room.”
“Andy, it’s okay. I told you…it’s
fine.”
“I just need some time Connie. I need
time to get my head around this.”
“Andy…take all the time you need.
I’ll still be here. I’m not going anywhere.”
They went for coffee at a coffee shop in
Connie’s neighborhood. Andy parked the car. They entered the coffee shop and
sat down. They chatted and talked about the cases they’d worked on today, the
big fight and what a jerk Laughlin was over several cups of coffee and
sandwiches.
They left the coffee shop and headed out
onto the street. Andy took her hand as they walked out onto the street. Connie
took his arm then and enclosed her arm in his. When he touched her like this, it
was impossible to stay mad at him for very long. She knew it was hard for Andy
to show his emotions but she usually could read what he was thinking just by how
he might touch her.
Tonight he seemed to be wearing his heart
on his sleeve. He’d let his guard down especially after they left the bar
tonight. In those stolen moments, his heart revealed more about the man and
she’d get a true sense of the man he really was. He wanted to love her. She
knew he did. She just didn’t know how to get him to realize it.
She felt warm and safe enclosed in his
embrace. There was nowhere else she’d rather be right now except in his arms.
They walked in silence together each
keeping their silent thoughts. If only he could hear her heart right now. Connie
felt as though it might jump right out of her chest. Being with him made her
feel so good. She didn’t want to do anything to mess up what they had
together. Because even if this was all they ever had, it still felt good. But
Connie wanted it to be so much more.
There was a part of her that knew somehow,
some way they were suppose to be together. Being with this man felt so right. He
already had her heart. He just didn’t know it yet.
She looked over at him and smiled as they
walked. She didn’t need to say anything. Andy glanced back at her and smiled.
The walk to Connie’s apartment wasn’t far. It seemed they made it there in
no time at all. They walked up the steps to her apartment and Andy walked her to
her door.
Connie put the key in the door, turned the
knob and unlocked the door to the apartment.
“You wanna come in??? Just for a bit?”
“No…I better go. I’ve got to get
home…Theo….
“Yeah…I guess it’s getting late.”
Andy held her hands in his.
”Connie…I want you to know… I meant what I said this morning. I’d never
be embarrassed being with you. It’s not you. It’s me. I just need more
time.”
“Andy…I know…it’s okay.
“I’m….
He put his finger to her lips to quiet her.
His finger lingered over her lips for just a moment and in that moment he knew
everything. He knew it in the way her mouth touched his skin. She was making it
okay for him. Okay for them to take their time together.
The touch of her lips on his finger jolted
him into awareness. He wanted to kiss her…really, really kiss her.
So what did he do? He kissed her on the
forehead instead and then abruptly pulled away. Part of him really wanted to
kiss her…hard and with passion throwing all caution to the wind…but he
didn’t. He couldn’t. But she made him want to.
“Andy…. wait. It’s okay. Whatever
this is, whatever it is that you and I feel, it’s worth waiting for. I just
want you to know that. We’ll go slow, okay?”
“Okay.”
She pulled him back to her as if to say,
“don’t be afraid of me.” And Connie laid her hands on his chest and then
proceeded to kiss him on the cheek.
“Good night.”
Andy returned the kiss and quickly kissed
her again on the forehead. He stood there and held her for a bit. The longer he
held her the more he didn’t want to let go. He sighed. He had so many
conflicting feelings and emotions.
“I better go or else I’ll never
leave.” He told her.
Connie knew the feeling well. Talk about
getting lost in the moment. She could barely think clearly after he’d put his
finger to her lips. She thought silently to herself “I’m about this close to
pulling him into the bedroom.” It took every ounce of strength she possessed
to tell him goodnight.
“Goodnight…and Andy…thanks for the coffee.” She paused.
“I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“See you tomorrow.”
She closed the door and Andy walked quietly
down the steps of the stairwell and out into the street. Spring was in the air
in New York City. You could smell it. Andy inhaled deeply. Being with her was
like breathing new life again. That’s how he felt when he was with her. He
glanced up at the window to her apartment and could see the light was on. He
smiled. She meant a lot to him. Connie McDowell was slowly weaving her way into
a heart that had been shattered by sadness and grief.
As he headed for home, Andy knew that this
could be the beginning of something good. For the first time in a long time,
Andy felt alive again.
The End