NYPD Blue Fanfiction
Tina's Fanfic
Conversations
With Andy
Episode expansions of the conversations
contained within the episodes “Safari So Good” and “Hand Job”.
Rated: R/NC-17 (For adult language
mostly. Very mild sexual situations.)
Author’s Notes:
This story takes place in between and
after the first and second “diner” conversations Andy and Connie have at the
coffee shop concerning their relationship. These conversations happen as a
direct result of the kiss in “Oh Mama”. We get the Connie angst in the first
conversation and then we get the Andy angst in the second conversation. They
finally agree that whatever this is or isn’t, it works and the conversation
ends with them agreeing to be in each other’s lives.
They spend the rest of Season 9 going
back and forth with each other until “Oedipus Wrecked” and that became the
turning point for their relationship to move forward.
My feeling is that at this point Andy
has already decided he likes her. That realization happened at the end of
“Jealous Hearts”. The kiss in “Oh Mama” scares Andy to death because he
has feelings for Connie. Now in these episodes (“Safari So Good” and “Hand
Job”) Andy’s realizing just how much he likes her but he’s scared because
he now knows she likes him too.
I thought it might be fun to expand
upon both conversations since the events seem to take place within a three-day
timeframe. One night is the kiss (“Oh Mama”)…the next night is the timing
for the 1st conversation (“Safari So Good”) and the next night is
the 2nd conversation (“Hand Job”) when Theo has an after school
play date and Andy asks Connie to dinner that night.
We don’t get to see the aftermath of
Connie’s mood after the first conversation and we don’t get to see what
happens immediately following the second conversation. The camera pans with a
fade shot of Andy after they agree to be together and in each other’s lives.
As always, your VP needs more where Andy and Connie are concerned. Of course, I
want to know what happened after that. That’s what I’m interested in and
I’m sure my fellow A & Cers are too. What happened that evening after they
finished dinner? The drama is in the details for me.
I love hooking together the chain of
events that brought them together and expanding upon them.
The episode that follows these two
episodes has Connie telling Andy at a crime scene that she wasn’t in the
previous evening because she was at the gym and got his call late. She wants to
know if they’re still on for the planetarium that night. Junior overhears the
conversation and that’s when Junior starts being a smart ass with Andy about
the “billions and billions of stars”…and asking, “if Theo is partial to
blondes?” The proof that Season 9 is so brilliant is contained within all
these scenes and it’s part of what makes Season 9 so magical for me.
I just thought I’d expand upon the
magic a bit more.
Enjoy,
Your VP
TC
Special Note: All dialogue written in
italics denotes lines that came directly from the episodes. The dialogue has
been reproduced here to lend authenticity to the story.
Previously on NYPD Blue.
Last Scene from “Oh Mama”
where Connie kisses Andy after seeing Monsters Inc. with him and Theo.
They’d walked all the way home
from the movie theatre hand in hand. Connie was so happy. She was beaming.
She’d had a wonderful time tonight with both of them…especially Andy.
Connie: Well…goodnight you guys. I
had a great time. (She bent down to give Theo a hug and a kiss. Theo goes to get
the mail.)
She turns to Andy. Andy turns to
face her not quite sure of what to do.
Andy: Thanks for coming.
Connie: Thanks for inviting me.
Andy: (nervously)…Well…(pause)
Goodnight. (and Andy gives her a friendly kiss on the cheek.)
Connie took that as a positive sign
and returned the kiss on the cheek with one of her own and then turned from his
cheek and proceeded to catch his lips in a fleeting kiss as she turned to tell
him goodbye.
Connie: Goodnight, Andy. (She smiled
silently to herself as she walked away down the street leaving Andy standing
there dumbfounded.)
Time: Early The Next Morning
Setting: Crime Scene, DOA’s
Apartment
Connie could see that he was nervous
around her this morning. She was beginning to worry that maybe she’d
overstepped the boundaries that Andy was so afraid to cross. But she’d had
such a good time last night. Being with Andy felt right. He made her feel good
and as far as she was concerned that was all that mattered. She’d been hoping
that he felt the same way. She sensed that he did but was afraid to tell her.
She hoped by kissing him last night that he’d see how she felt. She knew she
had to take it slow with him.
He seemed to enjoy their time together
and Connie had to smile when she thought about how Andy had asked her to the
movie last night. It’s like he wanted it to be a date but not really a date.
She knew he liked her but he always seemed a bit bashful about it. She didn’t
want to call him on it. He used Theo as an excuse. Last night when asked her to
the movie she knew it was Andy that really wanted her to go with them. It
didn’t matter if Theo wanted to see her.
This morning Andy was jumpy. He’d
been up all night practically. That kiss had him reeling. Talk about a wake-up
call. Okay, Sipowicz…reality check time. That kiss made him realize so many
things about what could and could not be. Their age difference…their stubborn
personalities…their age difference. Dear God…this was never gonna work. She
should be out finding a younger guy. Someone who could make her happy. Someone
she could start a family with. As far as Andy was concerned, there was just no
way Connie McDowell could possibly be falling for him. It was just too crazy.
She was too young…too beautiful and he was too old and a mutt to boot.
So he figured he better nip this in the
bud before things spiraled way out of his control. God, this was complicated
because he’d begun having feelings for her too. Even if he didn’t want to
admit it to himself, he knew that they were there. But no…he had to tell her
for her own good. He had to make her see. There was no way they could ever
really be together. There were too many things going against them for this to
work. He had to let her go…let her find another man to love…no matter how
much he liked her and he DID like her…a lot. That’s why this was going to be
so hard.
She deserved better…more than a mutt
like him. Andy had been through so much in his life that he wasn’t sure he
really knew how to be happy again but he didn’t want to tempt fate to find
out. . He has his job and he had his son. Those were the two most important
things in his life. Anything more and he was afraid the precious things that
mattered most to him might be taken from him yet again.
So he decided…I’ll just avoid her.
Scene II
He’d
spent the rest of the day avoiding her and avoiding his feelings. Now she was
calling him to the table on it.
“I’m in way over my head with
her.” Andy thought to himself as he sat there typing the rest of these 5’s.
He kept glancing over at her but he knew Connie. He was going to have his hands
full. She could be as stubborn and pigheaded as him and he knew she wasn’t
going to let this go until she found out what was on his mind. He was dreading
this.
Connie: “You got time for coffee
before you head home.”
Andy: “I’ve got to finish these
five’s.”
Connie: “Yeah, I got some work
here too…so whenever you’re ready.”
They both knew the paperwork could
wait. Connie could be tough as nails with him when she had to be and she’d
wait for him now to get done with his paperwork until hell froze over if she had
to. She wasn’t leaving this squad room tonight without getting some answers
from him.
Scene III
Andy: All right…so we got our
coffee.
Connie: Did everything go all right after I left last night?
Andy: Yeah.
Connie: “Then what’s the
problem?”
Andy: “There’s no problem. You
tryin’ to talk me into one?”
Connie: You’ve been acting completely weird today.
And…stop it! Is it about me
kissing you last night?
Andy: (still intent on denying the
truth) Phifft…No…What would the big deal be about? You know…why would I?
Yeah. Yeah, it was.
Connie: Andy… I love you and Theo
dearly. I really do. And last night I was…(pause) I was…I was just so happy.
It just came out. I wasn’t trying to be coy or flirt.
Andy: All it did was make me think
how we’d been spending a lot of time together when you should be spending the
nights out there meeting some guy that you could be with…go the distance with.
Connie: Thank you for looking out
for me like that but I’m fine. Spending time with you and Theo has meant a lot
to me. It feels comfortable. It makes me feel good and I’ve been hoping
(pause) that it’s been making you feel good too.
Andy: It has.
Connie: Good.
Andy: All I’m sayin’ is you’re
gonna need to find someone your age to have kids with… Start a family with.
Connie: Well, that’s not gonna
happen…
Andy: (interrupting) Sure it will.
You’ll find the right guy and boom…
Connie: I can’t have kids…like
physically. I’m not able to. I had complications when I was 15 and when all
that happened and a… I can’t.
Andy: Oh, …so spending all this
time together…it’s about spending time with Theo.
We then see Connie’s reaction to
this statement.
Connie: (sighs angrily) If this is a
problem for you, then okay. I don’t want to complicate your life.
Why couldn’t he just tell her he
liked her? Why was he making this so hard? Sometimes Andy talked in riddles. He
liked her but he couldn’t tell her that. His stupid, foolish pride wouldn’t
let him admit it. Connie was trying to understand but she’d just reached her
breaking point.
She just got up and left. She just
walked out and left him sitting there. Andy let out a long drawn out sigh.
She’d left the diner in a fit of
rage. “God damn it!” She exclaimed as she hit the steering wheel with her
fist as she started the car and drove home. The more she thought about him the
angrier she got. His words had hurt. She knew he cared for her. Why couldn’t
he just admit it?
By the time she’d driven home,
she’d calmed down a little bit but her nerves were still on edge. Arghhhhhh…that
man!!! He had the power to infuriate the crap out of her!! Damn him!!!
She walked up the stairs to her
apartment and unlocked the door. She went through her mail and checked her
messages on the machine. She went into the kitchen, opened the freezer door and
stared at a pint of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream. Ice cream for dinner. She might
just eat the whole thing she thought to herself. When upset, ice cream’s the
only way to go. She got out a spoon and started to dig in but then she thought
better of it. She took two bites and then decided that ice cream wasn’t gonna
solve anything tonight. She put the ice cream away and headed to the bathroom.
She decided that maybe a bubble bath
was in order. Maybe if she pampered herself tonight she wouldn’t be so upset
and frustrated with herself and her situation with Andy. What’s wrong with
you, McDowell? You know better. You know you have to take it slow with him.
Sometimes she wanted to hit him over the head with a 2 x 4. If he could only see
what was right in front of his face.
She put on some soft music, turned down
the lights, lit some aromatic candles by the tub and ran the bathwater. She
undressed, got into the tub, closed her eyes and lost herself in the suds.
She’d been sitting there for about 15 minutes when she’d heard a soft knock
at the door. She got out of the tub, put on her robe and went to the door to see
who it was.
“Connie, you there?”
“Andy??”
“Can I come in? I can only stay a
minute. I’m on my way to pick up Theo.”
“Sure…everything okay??” She
unlocked the deadbolt and stepped away from the door to let him in.
Andy felt his mouth go dry as he
entered the apartment. He got a good look at her there in that robe. There she
stood naked underneath in this oversized, white, fluffy, terry cloth robe
loosely tied around her body. Her hair was damp from the water. He could see
there was a light mist of water on her skin where the robe opened at her neck.
Ay yi yi!!!! Her skin shimmered in the soft, pale light. She looked absolutely
beautiful he thought.
“What the fuck am I doing here?” he
thought to himself. Haul your ass out of here now you idiot…before you make a
complete fool of yourself.
God, this was complicated. All these
things he was feeling and they were all because Connie had turned his world
upside last night. All because of one little kiss. Part of him wanted to run out
the door and part of him wanted to kiss her senseless right here, right now and
show her how he really felt. That’s how mixed up she made him feel sometimes.
Andy thought to himself , “If you had any guts at all, you coward, you’d
pick her up and carry her into that bedroom and make her yours.” He cleared
his throat instead.
“If this is a bad time…I’m not
interrupting anything am I??…You expectin’ company or somethin’??” Andy
looked around the apartment. He’d noticed the soft music and candles lit
around the apartment. He noticed the lights were low.
Connie had to smile. Only Andy would
think she was expecting company…someone other than him.
“No, Andy…but look what the cat
dragged in. It’s not a bad time. Come on in. What’s on your mind?”
Andy, too caught up in his own
nervousness, ignored her remark.
“Err…I can only stay a minute. I
just wanted to make sure…eh…I mean…(Andy stood there stammering…grasping
for something to say. He wiped his forehead with the back of his hand.)
“We are friends, right?”
“Andy…c’mon…you know we are.”
“I just wanted to make sure you were
okay. I better go. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
And Andy took her hand in his and gave
it a squeeze as if to say “Please don’t give up on me” and then touched
her cheek softly with the back of his hand.
“Well, goodnight.” He’d told her.
“Goodnight.” She told him and
closed the door.
She almost melted right there. All he
had to do was touch her and she wanted to run into his arms and hold onto him
forever. It had been a long time since she’d cared for someone so deeply. She
knew she was falling for Andy. She so desperately wanted to take away all the
bad things that had happened in his life. She knew Andy’s heart was a fragile
thing. He was so worried he’d lost her as a friend tonight. He’d been afraid
that their argument had done irreparable damage to their relationship or
whatever this was. In his eyes, even that would be too much of a loss for him to
bear. He couldn’t stand to lose her as a friend. She’d helped him through so
much. As she closed the door, she listened intently as she heard the sound of
his footsteps walking softly down the hall to the stairwell.
Connie shut her eyes and let out a
frustrated sob. She almost wanted to bang her head against the apartment door.
She repeated the mantra she’d memorized by heart now. “Patience, Connie,
patience.”
Down the stairway and through the
apartment building’s front entrance, Andy walked outside into the cold, crisp
night air of the city. He almost jumped down those steps. He rested the back of
his head against the cold brick of the building. He felt a panic attack coming
on. Get your ass out of here now, Sipowicz. That woman has the power to undo you
and you know it. You almost blew it just now.
Time: Late Afternoon
Andy agonized all day about the way he’d left things between them last night in the diner. He knew he had to tell her how he really felt. She’d been the one good thing in his life these past few months. One bright, shining light. He had to make her understand that it wasn’t her…it was him. A guy would have to be crazy not to want to be with her. He just couldn’t chance risking his heart again.
Still, she’d been such a good friend
to him. She’d saved him from himself. She put up with all his crap and she was
still talking to him. He decided to invite her to dinner tonight. Theo had a
play date after school and he could spend some time alone with her and explain.
Andy: “You want to get something
to eat tonight. Theo’s got a play date until eight.”
Connie: “Sure...” and she headed
to the locker room with a look of surprise on her face.
Connie walked into the locker room and
looked in the mirror. What just happened? Did he just ask me out? Connie shook
her head. Okay, Connie…slow down. Don’t get your hopes up. You need to let
him do this in his own time and in his own way. He likes you. He really does
like you. You know he does. And you like him. It’s just that he’s afraid.
You know his past. He’s scared. Let him know that it’s okay to be scared.
You are too.
All she knew though was that he made
her feel safe and protected. She loved being with him and she wasn’t ready to
trade those feelings for anything in the world.
Andy and Connie are seated at their
booth in the coffee shop eating dinner. We pick up on their conversation:
Andy: “Theo was asking when
you’re gonna be coming by next.”
Connie: “What do you want me to
do? I can only make decisions based on what you tell me and last time we talked
about us, it sounded like it wasn’t working for you.”
Andy: I know. I know what I said.
Connie: I don’t understand why you
want to turn away from something that feels good.
Andy: I got my son. He’s my blessing. My second chance. I got my job.
Anything more…every time I try to
reach out for something beyond that, it gets taken from me. That’s where I
feel I was goin’ spending time with you.
Connie: You can’t live your life
defensively like that.
Andy: Sure you can.
Connie: You don’t have to is what
I’m saying. Okay…so…what do you want to do?
Andy: I want you in our life.
Connie: “Then let’s just leave
it at that…okay?? Let’s just agree to be in each other’s lives and not
label it past that.
Andy: “Okay.”
Connie: “ We’ll keep it
simple…cause whatever this is or isn’t, it works. Don’t you think?”
Andy: Yeah.
Connie: All right then.
A little bit of that…
It started with a kiss…
Now you’re up to bat…
It’s all in the game of love.
They finished their meal in a
comfortable silence. Andy still had about an hour or so before he had to pick
Theo up from his play date.
Andy got up to pay for dinner and they
left the restaurant. As they made their way out into the street, Connie linked
her right arm inside Andy’s left arm and huddled closer to him. Andy cleared
his throat.
“Eh…. you know…I still have some
time before I have to pick up Theo. Would you like to take a walk with me? I
could walk you to your car.” He didn’t want this evening to end just yet. It
was four or five blocks to where Connie had parked her car.
“That’d be good. I’d love to take
a walk.” Connie responded. As they began walking, Andy slowly reached out to
touch her hand and then he slowly enclosed her hand in his. Connie felt an inner
warmth inside her as he held her hand. They walked up the street in silence for
a bit. Connie felt Andy’s hand grow damp. She smiled up at him as she gave his
hand a small squeeze back.
Connie: “It’s okay you know…”
Andy: “What’s okay?”
Connie: “To be nervous.”
Andy: “I’m not
nervous….I’m….I’m…”
Connie put one finger to his lips.
Connie: “Andy…. now you’re lying
to me.”
Andy: “Okay…I give…I am
nervous.”
Connie laughed. “It’s okay. I’m
nervous too. But it’s a good kind of nervous. Let’s just not be
uncomfortable around one another, okay?? I don’t think I could stand another
day like today of us tiptoeing around each other all day long. I don’t want
you to feel uncomfortable around me…ever. I enjoy being with you Andy. I want
to be in your life. Life’s too short…you of all people should know that.”
“So when I say that I have feelings
for you, Andy…those feelings aren’t all about Theo. They’re about you and
how you make me feel. You mean a lot to me, Andy. You do make me feel good.”
“You make me feel good too.”
He cleared his throat again not quite
knowing what to say but wanting to say something. He held her hand a little bit
tighter as they walked into the parking lot around the corner from the station
house.
Andy: “Connie, thanks for listening
to me tonight.”
Connie: “Andy…it’s no problem.
I’m glad we got things out in the open tonight. I don’t want us keeping our
feelings for each other bottled up inside. You’ve got to let them out,
okay??”
Andy: “Okay.”
Connie: “Well, I better get
going…thanks for dinner.”
Andy: “You’re welcome.”
Connie: “Give Theo a big hug and a kiss for me, okay?”
(And then Connie proceeds to give Andy
a friendly hug and a kiss on the cheek.)
(After that exchange…)
Connie: “That was for Theo. This
(pauses)…this is just for you.”
And Connie proceeds to wrap her arms
around the back of Andy’s neck and capture his mouth in a passionate kiss.
Andy responded. Man…he certainly could kiss when he wanted to. Her mind
wandered for a moment as she lost herself in his response to her. “Oh God.”
her mind cried out as she wondered for a minute what it might be like to feel
his mouth all over her body.
Andy pressed himself closer to her; Connie met his response as her hips leaned into him.
She broke the kiss…needing air.
Suddenly, the ground on which she stood seemed shaky. She held onto him for
support.
He gave her a quick, fleeting kiss on
the temple of her forehead and released her. It took everything she had right
now to not just plead with him right here on the street to come home with her.
“Cool it, McDowell” she thought to herself as she chastised herself for
being so bold with him tonight. “You’re getting a little ahead of
yourself.”
Andy: “Connie?”
Connie: Yeah…(as she slowly began to
regain some sense of control again. She fumbled with his shirt collar and
straightened his tie.)
Andy: “I think we better say
goodnight.” (And he kissed her forehead again.)
Connie: (rather shyly now) “I had a
good time tonight. Thanks again for dinner and for really talking to me.”
They’d reached her car. Andy was
holding on to her hand. He turned her to him.
Andy: “Hey, Theo wants to go to the
planetarium one day this week. Would you like to join us?”
Connie: “I’d love to. Call me,
okay? Well, goodnight.”
Andy: Connie…goodnight…I’ll see
you tomorrow.”
Connie: See you tomorrow. (And she
flashed him a smile.)
He opened the car door for her and then
shut it for her. She rolled down the window and told him goodnight again. She
didn’t want to leave him. He kissed her forehead yet again and sent her on her
way home.
As Andy walked to his car and headed
home into the cold, crisp New York night, he thought about their conversation at
dinner. He didn’t know what he’d done to deserve her but Connie McDowell had
been a gift from God. For the first time since Sylvia had passed, Andy felt a
glimmer of hope. Maybe this was going to work after all.
Fat man sitting on a little stool
Takes the money from my hand while his eyes take a walk all over you
Hands me two tickets, smiles and whispers “Good Luck”.
Cuddle up angel…cuddle up my little dove
And we’ll ride down baby into this
tunnel of love.
I can feel the soft silk of your blouse.
And them soft thrills in our little fun house
Then the lights go out and it’s just the three of us.
Yeah, you, me and all that stuff we’re so scared of.
Gotta ride down baby into this
tunnel of love.
There’s a crazy mirror showing us both in 5-D.
I’m laughing at you.
You’re laughing at me.
There’s a room full of shadows that
gets so dark brother.
It’s easy for two people to lose each other
In this tunnel of love.
It ought to be easy.
Ought to be simple enough.
Man meets a woman and they fall in love.
But the house is haunted and the ride gets rough.
You’ve got to learn to live with what you can’t rise above
If you want to ride on down in
through this tunnel of love.