Southerner

>

> >

> > Only a true Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit

> > and a conniption.

> >

> > Nobody but a true Southerner knows how many fish make up a mess.

> >

> > A true Southerner can show or point out to you the general

> > direction of cattywumpus.

> >

> > A true Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is-as in

> > "Going to town, be back directly."

> > Even true Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not

> > a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits

> > in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.

> >

> > All true Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is.

> >

> > True Southerners know instinctively that the best gesture of

> > solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot

> > fried chicken and a big bowl of cold tater salad. (If the

> > trouble is a real crisis, they also know to addsome hot

> > biscuits and nanner puddin'.)

> >

> > True Southerners grow up knowing the difference between

> > "pert' near" and "a right far piece."

> >

> > True Southerners both know and understand the differences

> > between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and po'white trash.

> >

> > No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the

> > flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.

> >

> > True Southerners know that "fixin" can be used both as a noun,

> > verb and adverb.