It's the summer of my freshman year of college. When I left last fall, I was idylistic, to be kind. I knew college wouldn't shake my faith, and while it didn't change the underlying belief, much certainly changed. I'd always been an on-and-off Bible reader, something I had always tried to change, but Church, Sunday school and youth group had been respectable parts of my week. Once in college, I did Lutheran Studen Mission for 30 minutes to an hour, when I could remember. The first few weeks, I always prayed over my food, but after a while, I started forgetting until it was only once in a while by the end of the year. Before, ambulances, police sirens and those of fire trucks had always been cause for a quick prayer, but by May, all I found myself doing was thinking "What stupid thing did a college kid do now?" Prayer was something I rarely did, period, unless I had a test or exam coming up.
That's wrong.
Faith is something that should show in everyday life. Actions and practices of Christians are watched carefully. I always hated people who said they were Christians but didn't act like it and I found myself boardering on one of them (for clarification, usually that means people who brag about how much sex they had, cuss and don't even try to lead morally upright lives). I coudln't fulfill my own minimum expectations of a true believer. Not that I'm some crazy person who thinks I can only hang out with other Christians, but I wasn't even praying. Huge warning sign.
So, on this day, Friday, May 16, 2008, I decided to read my Bible again and start over from the beginning. And I'll make my walk through the Bible public so that I can't slack off and pretend that no one will notice. Because slacking off one day leads to another and before I know it, I'll be right back where I am now. And I don't like where I am.