THE
LINES OF DESCENT
By
Mason-Dixon
Authors’ disclaimer: The Sentinel and all related characters are the property of Paramount Pictures and Pet Fly Productions. No copyright infringement intended.
WARNING: This story contains
non-sexual, disciplinary spanking; it is slash and adult in nature.
This one is dedicated to S and to all like him. On the edges of the storm, in the center of upheaval, at the rim of chaos, and on the shores of madness, the strong stand and reach out pulling in the shattered souls. Some just do it with a hard hand and velvet gloves and need never be asked.
In a
circular fashion the lines began to descend, encircling them all in a loving
concern. The wise ones passed on and the younger stepped in and the neophytes
joined in the ring. The love and the caring did slowly amend and soon they all
did learn. As the circle encompassed them all in and made it a family thing.
Now if circles continue to loop and descend, then surely a spiral it draws. As
in and out and around it bends, and often sets down all the laws. The lines of
descent are a spiral shape and they travel not up nor down. They encompass them
all in a loving cape and hug them with warmth all around. (From the Lines of
Demarcation)
Trying to stretch enough to relieve the small cramps in his muscle, but not enough to disturb his lover sitting next to him, Blair Sandburg, anthropologist, police observer, guide, shaman and most importantly, lover of Jim Ellison, sighed and glanced over at the sleeping man next to him. Hoping against hope that he was waking up so Blair would not have to disturb him to go walk around the plane. They were only two hours into their 7-hour flight to London from Atlanta and Blair was already restless. They had caught a plane that morning from Seattle to a lay over in Atlanta, and were now on the Trans-Atlantic portion of their trip. Looking out the window, he could see nothing but darkness. Not sure if they were over water already or simply above the clouds, he decided it really didn't matter. No matter where they were now, there wasn't anything he could do. Glancing over at Jim asleep in his chair, he briefly thought about accidentally nudging the detective, simply to have someone for conversation. The lines of exhaustion, the twitching muscle as his jaw clenched in sleep, and the slightly unhealthy pallor of the other man tugged at Blair's heart and he knew there was no way he could wake Jim up.
A stewardess walked
quietly up to him and whispered so as not to disturb the other passengers
enjoying the movie, "Sir, do you need anything? Would you like something to drink or an extra pillow?"
Noting the
uncomfortable position of the sleeping form, he smiled, "Yes, please -- a
couple of pillows and a blanket would be nice.
Thanks."
She returned quickly,
carrying a thermal blanket and two pillows.
Accepting them, he
flashed her a warm smile, "Thanks."
Noticing that these
were almost normal pillows, not the small little airline pillows that the other
passengers back in Coach were trying to get comfortable with, Blair decided
that flying First Class definitely had its advantages. When the tickets for their London vacation
had come in the mail, Blair had opened them and was surprised to see that they
were booked on First Class.
"Jim," he
had called out to his lover in the bedroom, "they messed up the tickets,
you have to call the travel agent and get them fixed."
Coming down the
stairs, Jim reached for the tickets. "Here, let me see. What's wrong?"
"We're booked on
First Class, man, not the regular fare."
"Oh, no, that's not a mistake. I
booked that."
"Why?" Blair asked, surprised. "That must have cost a fortune."
Jim smiled at him,
"Yeah, it was more expensive, but I have flown Trans-Atlantic flights
before in Coach and am not doing it again.
Long flight as it is, it seems like an eternity stuck in little seats
next to screaming kids and people who talk all night. Not my idea of a relaxing way to start or end a vacation."
Now comfortably
seated in a large seat with a pullout footrest reclining to almost flat, he had
to agree it was well worth the extra cost.
Glancing over at Jim again, Blair smiled.
"Come here,
love," he muttered, "let's see if we can get you a little more
comfortable." Pushing up the two
armrests that separated the seat, Blair reached over and gently touched Jim's
shoulder. "Jim," he said
softly, "wake up for a second for me."
Slowly opening his
eyes, Jim looked at his partner, "What's wrong? Do you need something?" he asked wearily.
"No, love, it's
okay. I just want to get you a little
more comfortable. Here, sit up for a
sec."
Jim sat up and
stretched a little, "Where are we?"
he asked, looking around.
"On a
plane. Remember?" Blair answered
teasingly.
Jim shot him a glare.
"I don't know,
we've been flying for about two hours."
Blair reached across the bigger man and pressed the button, lowering the
seat. He lowered his own seat the
same amount. Putting up the footrests
on both seats, he placed one of the pillows behind his back and leaned against
the bulkhead of the plane. Opening
his arms, he said, "Come here, lay down on me and try to go back to
sleep."
Jim glanced at him
and then glanced around the darkened cabin.
"Jim, no one
cares, no one knows who we are, and they don't care what we do. Now," he said in a mild show of
authority, "come here and try to get some sleep. You look exhausted and I don't want your friends to think I don't
take care of you as well as you take care of me."
Jim gave one last
look around the cabin, satisfying himself that no one was even remotely
interested in what two men in one of the back rows were doing, and gently laid
his head on Blair's chest.
Pushing a pillow
underneath his lover's lower back, Blair could feel Jim start to relax
again. Picking up the blanket from next
to him on the seat, he spread it out on top of the other man and let the soft
warmth relax him even more.
"See, isn't this
more comfortable?" he asked, wrapping an arm around one of Jim's
shoulders, the other, grasping his hand.
"Yes, much, I
can hear your heart beat so clearly," Jim mumbled, his voice heavy again
with sleep.
"Good, now close
your eyes and try to get back to sleep."
The other man glanced
up, "You too, Junior, you need your sleep," trying to sound stern,
but the sleepiness ruined the effect.
"I'm heading
that way myself."
A few minutes later,
he felt Jim take a deep breath and relax back into sleep.
As tired as the
younger man was, he did not feel like sleeping. It was too amazing to watch Jim sleep, to feel the heaviness and
warmth of the other man so relaxed against him. The last six weeks had been extremely hard on the detective and
his health had suffered. Blair had done
what he could, making sure that the other man ate at least somewhat healthy
food and slept as much as possible. Jim
had been plagued by horrible nightmares that Blair had been helpless to prevent
or control. Many nights, he had awoken
to find himself alone in bed, and a small light in the kitchen softly
illuminating his lover standing out on the balcony staring off into the city he
was sworn to protect, but was failing so miserably.
The case had involved
the bodies of young adults, men and women, each victim seemingly younger then
the last. All had been discovered hung
by their necks; feet or toes barely touching a small stool or box placed under
them. All had gags on with large dildos
forced down their throats and all had been brutally raped with various objects
left in the rooms as vivid evidence of what had happened. They were found in various low-rent hotel
rooms staged for snuff films. The films
had come out on the market about a week after each victim was killed. Fifteen young people found dead, before
Major Crimes was able to stop the killer.
The case had wrapped
up over two weeks ago with the killer's confession, but Jim was still on
edge. He needed to relax and forget
about the case, about crime and the horrors of the world and it's inhabitants
for a while. After several long talks
between Blair and Simon – both men concerned and worried about their friend, he
had extended their requested, two weeks off to over three and Blair was looking
forward to the extra time in England.
They had planned the trip earlier, and the timing was perfect to get Jim
away from it all. By mutual agreement,
he was not teaching this term, concentrating on his dissertation and his work
with Jim, so the extra time off had been easy for him to swing.
Now, they were
heading east to visit Vincent Cade and his partner Damien St. Claire. Blair smiled at the remembered excitement in
Day's e-mails as they chatted about what to see and where to go. He was looking forward to meeting the man
who had been so helpful in dealing with the ups and downs of the discipline
relationship he was trying with Jim.
The six-month trial-period was coming to an end in October and he knew
that it would be his decision if they were to continue to make discipline,
rules and consequences, a part of their life or not.
Their relationship
was steadily improving since the incident during spring finals, when Blair had
taken the law into his own hands to help a troubled student. June had been a little rocky as Blair
adjusted to the strict time constraints---about how much time he was allowed to
spend on police work---Jim had placed on him.
By July, things had settled down and Blair had to admit that a semester
had never gone smoother. They seemed to
have found their niche with each other and in their relationship. The comfortable ease of their lives jointly
met at angles to help ease the strain of their different worlds. Blair was flourishing under the steadying
hand of Jim. Summer term had come and
gone smoothly. The happiness and
peaceful sailing was disrupted in mid-August with the first gruesome snuff
film.
The detective with
heightened senses perhaps would not have been so deeply affected by the crime,
if it were not for the age of the victims. No doubt, looking into the youthful
face of the one who mattered most to him in the entire world each morning did
much to personalize the case. As the
body count rose, Jim pushed himself beyond human levels of endurance,
oftentimes angrily brushing Blair’s concerns and ministrations aside. He acted
like a one-man crime force and refused to share any blame as the death toll mounted.
It was Jim’s sense of
smell that had eventually recognized the faint aroma of tobacco. Finally
identifying the expensive imported stogies, they were able to pinpoint the
dealers and eventually set up a database to tag potential suspects. Within twenty-four
hours, their man was trapped and a confession extracted.
The lack of physical
care had taken more than its toll on Ellison. Even their relationship had been
pulled taut and thin by the fiery exchanges.
Blair had felt out of control and the situation was only eased by his
correspondence with Damien. Many times a “Vin won’t be too happy to hear about
that,” had reassured Blair that there was someone he could turn to should the
situation become critical. Thank God
the case had ended before it had ended their relationship.
Still thinking about
the past five months with Jim and their new arrangement, Blair drifted into a
restless slumber.
Seemingly mere
minutes later, he was awakened by a gentle, but persistent nibble and kiss on
his lips. Opening his eyes, he stared
directly into the blue orbs of his lover.
"Morning,"
Jim whispered. "We are about an
hour out and I thought it was time you woke up, sleepy head."
"Jim, did you
just kiss me? In public?" Blair
said, trying to keep the happiness out of his voice, only to magnify the
shocked awe.
"Well, I figured
if anyone cared about what we were doing, we really didn't leave much to the
imagination last night with me sleeping all over you. Plus," he said, glancing around, "didn't you tell me
that no one knew us and no one cared?"
"Yeah, but
that's never gotten you to do anything before," Blair said with a laugh.
The same stewardess
from last night walked over, "Sir, we will be serving breakfast for the
next thirty minutes, may I get you something?"
Blair looked up,
"Umm, yes please, just a Danish or muffin would be good. Thank you."
Nodding, the
stewardess hurried away, returning shortly with a plate of several muffins,
jams and clotted cream. Jim had already
finished off a breakfast of scrambled eggs and bacon. Now he nursed a cup of
coffee as he watched his lover adjust to the day.
Breaking apart a
muffin, and spreading jam on it, Blair asked, "So, how are we going to get
from Gatewick to Vin's apartment in London?"
"Vin wasn't sure
if he and Day would be able to meet us or not, I think he had some meeting this
morning to go to. If he's not there,
we'll just catch the Gatewick Express that takes us straight to Victoria, and
then we'll just grab a cab. I have the
address in my wallet."
"How far away is
it, do you know?"
"About thirty
minutes by train, maybe forty by car.
Don't really remember, but it's an easy ride."
"Sounds good,
I'm going to be happy to get off this plane.
How'd you sleep?"
"Pretty good,
I'm a little tired, but I think it's more about all that's been going on this
month than just not getting a full eight hours last night."
Blair nodded, "I
didn't really sleep that well, but I feel fine. I think I dozed some."
"You seemed
pretty out of it until I woke you up. I
hope I wasn't too heavy, Chief.”
"No, not at
all. I don't know, excited about the
trip, excited about meeting Day and Vin, excited about spending three weeks
with you, no work, nothing to get in the way, nada,” Blair finished with a
laugh, a huge yawn closing the statement.
Jim smiled at him,
"I think a nap when we get to the apartment would be a good idea for both
of us."
Before Blair could
comment, the stewardess came by to collect the breakfast tray and announce that
they were beginning their approach into Gatewick.
As soon as she left,
Blair glanced at Jim. "I'm not tired and I'm anxious to get out and do
something. I don't want to nap like a
little kid. Don't start being a dictator
again."
Jim sighed,
"Let's not get into it here, love, I don't relish taking you into the
bathroom and spanking you or having to do it first thing at Vin's, and that's
exactly what's going to happen if you keep up that tone of voice,” he finished
sternly.
Blair glared at him.
"Then you stop being such an ass and let me do what I want."
Jim stared at the
younger man for almost a full minute, as if in shock at what he had just heard.
"That's it, Blair, you and I are going to have a discussion about this
attitude of yours as soon as we get to the apartment. I highly suggest you
don't make the situation worse by keeping it up."
Blair opened his
mouth as if to say something, his eyes flashing, but Jim cut him off. "I'm not kidding, Blair, drop it and
don't get yourself into any more trouble."
His face flushed as
if just realizing how quickly things had spun out of control and how much
trouble he was in a matter of a few minutes.
The plane landed
safely and they both went through customs with no more then a brief glance at
their passports. Stopping in the main
greeting area where friends and family awaited those arriving, Jim looked
around for his old friend.
"Hey, Jim,
" Blair said, the first none monosyllable he had said since his outburst
on the plane, "think he's for us?"
Jim glanced in the
direction that his lover was pointing and saw a well-dressed gentleman in a
dark suit holding a sign saying, "J. Ellison/B. Sandburg" walking
toward them. "Yeah, Chief, I would
think so."
The man walked up to
them, "Mr. Ellison, Master Blair?"
"Yes, that's
us. I'm Jim Ellison."
The older man smiled,
"And I am Robert Patrick, I work for Mr. Cade and Master Damien. They were detained at home and asked that I
come and pick you both up. If you will
follow me, I've got the car through here." With that, he took hold of the luggage cart and began to wheel it
towards the doors leading to the outside.
Walking in step with
the driver, Blair asked, "So, you work for Vin?"
"Yes, I am his
driver while in town and I take care of the London flat while they are in
Salisbury. I have worked for him for
over six years now. My wife was their
housekeeper until she died several years ago and I retired. Mr. Cade needed someone to watch over the
London place and has kept me on salary for that. Ah, here's the car," he said as they came upon a black
sedan.
Opening the back
door, he ushered the two men inside, placing the luggage in the trunk. Walking around, he got in the front seat,
glancing at his two passengers through the rearview mirror, he said, "Sit
back and enjoy the ride, we should be there in about 45 minutes."
"Great,
thanks," Jim replied. Blair sat
and stared out the window as they quickly left the airport grounds and made
their way to the highway.
"Blair,"
Jim said softly, extending his arm, "come here."
Blair looked at Jim
for a few moments, trying to decide if he was still annoyed about the incident
on the plane and if Jim was still committed to the promised discussion once
they reached their destination.
Deciding he would rather relax in Jim's arms than pout by himself, he leaned
over and allowed himself to be pulled into a strong embrace.
"Let's talk
about what happened on the plane, okay?
I really did not want to spend the first few hours over here spanking
you."
"JIM!"
Blair hissed embarrassed and angry, jerking his head toward the back of the
driver's head.
"What?" Jim
asked, "I'm sure this discussion is not coming as a surprise." Raising his voice slightly, he said,
"Patrick, do you know what sort of relationship that Mr. Cade and Damien
are in?"
"Which
relationship would that be, Sir? The
fact that they are in a homosexual one or a discipline one?"
"A discipline
relationship."
"Yes, sir. I am fully aware of that relationship. In fact, Master Damien found himself
being---shall we say---“attended to,” on the car ride up from Salisbury last
week. I was under the impression that
the incident he was pouting about had happened earlier in the day and was being
continued by him once they got in the car.
Mr. Cade was not pleased about that and dealt with the inappropriateness
of that action for some time. From the
sounds of it, Master Damien now understands that it was not
appropriate." Glancing back
briefly at Blair, he continued, "Don't be embarrassed, Master Blair, there
is nothing shameful about your relationship. It would only be a shame if you did not accept it for the
beautiful and wonderful relationship it can be."
Blair glanced down
and mumbled, "We are still trying this and working out the details. Not sure if we are going to continue or
not."
The driver smiled at
the younger man in the mirror, and said gently, "Well, it's something you
have to decide for yourself."
Jim smiled to himself
and nudged Blair again, "Come here, lean back with me and let's talk about
this morning."
Blair sighed and
leaned back, worming his way under Jim's arm so that it draped over him. "I'm not tired, Jim. I don't want to lie down."
Glancing at his
watch, now adjusted for British time, he said, "Blair, love, it's three
a.m., Cascade time. You said yourself you didn't sleep much on the plane and
you are definitely cranky."
Jerking up and away
from the warm arms, Blair glared at him, "Fuck you! Stop being so bossy. God, you can be such a fucking dictator at
times."
In the front seat,
Patrick's eyebrows raised in surprise at the tone of the younger man's
voice. Having been privy to similar
scenes of rebellion and attitude on the part of another young man, he was fully
expecting to hear the sounds of an attitude adjustment coming from the back
seat. Instead, he heard an older voice,
one weary of the fight say, "Fine, Blair, but you and I are going to have
a serious discussion when we get to Vin's house. I will not allow you to use that tone of voice."
The only reply was a
barely audible, "Go to hell, Jim."
The rest of the car
ride was in stone, cold silence, the only sound coming from the tires on the
payment. Patrick glanced back once or
twice to discreetly check the mood and temperature of his passengers, noting
that the icy chill was all too familiar. Sighing heavily, used to the games of
this particular warfare, he concentrated on the ease and grace with which the
Sedan hugged the roads.
After carefully but
efficiently navigating the busy streets of greater London, the car pulled in
front of a row of town houses on a residential street of Kensington.
"Here we are,
sirs. " Patrick said, stopping the
car and getting out. Coming around, he
held open the back door as Blair and Jim climbed out.
The front door of the
house swung open, revealing the large form of Vincent Cade. Smiling wide, he hurried down the few steps
to the street to meet Jim. The two men
embraced warmly like friends separated too long.
Holding onto Jim, Vin
pulled back slightly and seemed to give the other man a quick once over, brown
eyes trapping details, noting demeanor, mood and pallor. Embracing again, he said softly into
Ellison’s ear, “It’s truly good to see you again, little boy. Perhaps it was just in time. You seem to
have neglected your general health in these past weeks. What kind of example is that on your
partner, hmmm? Not a very good one I
would think." The detective nodded
once and hugged the other man back, briefly resting his head on Vin's shoulder,
a gesture that reminded Blair of someone finally coming home.
Blair could swear he
saw Jim relax. The large man who he loved more than his own life seemed to
expel all his control. He deflated into
the larger man, as though fearless and sure of some haven now reached.
“Give it up for now,
you are in my hands. I have control. Just let it go.”
The words seeped into
Jim’s soul. He fragmented himself, pushing the fears and horrors of Cascade out
of his mind. Someone else held the reins, and he was happy to just ride for a
while. "Yes, sir. Thank you."
Blair noted the quiet
exchange, unable to hear the precise words. Jim suddenly seemed more tired then
on the plane, a little more fragile.
Feeling guilty over his earlier outbursts, he glanced nervously at his
shoes. Looking up, he saw with a flash
of jealousy that the two men were still holding each other tightly and speaking
in hushed tones.
Feeling the earlier
annoyance and attitude come back with a force, he stepped forward, clearing his
throat none-too-subtly.
Jim looked up and
smiled, "I hadn't forgotten you, Chief---promise."
Blair flashed him a
small grin, "I wasn't too sure there for awhile."
Vin released Jim and
took a step forward, frowning at the younger man's tone and words. Making a “tsking” with his tongue, he said,
"You know better than that, little boy."
Then smiling and
sticking out his hand, he added, "It's a pleasure to finally meet you,
Blair. You have done a world of good
for our boy, Jim, here. I hope you are
benefiting as much from the relationship." A note of doubt laced the moot
question.
"I am, Jim and I
are very much in love," Blair answered, choosing not to refer to their
other relationship, his tone bordering on rude.
Raising his eyebrow
at the younger man's tone and implication, Vin glanced at Jim.
Stepping forward,
Ellison made for a save, "You will have to excuse Blair. He didn't really sleep on the plane and is
tired. I think, if you don't mind, we
would both benefit from a nap and Blair and I have to discuss some of his
comments on the plane and just recently in the car." The two men exchanged looks of
understanding.
Vin laughed and
smiled, allowing Ellison his rights of control over the young man, "Of
course, Damien and I are in the middle of having our own discussion right
now. That's why we were unable to meet
you at the airport. I hope Patrick
found you without any trouble."
Jim smiled at the
driver and said, "Perfectly. He
was waiting just outside customs with a sign and introduced himself right
away."
Seeing a break in the
conversation, Patrick quickly spoke up, "Mr. Cade, I'll take the car
around back and bring up the luggage.
What room do you want it put in?"
"Oh, that'd be
great. Thanks." Pausing for a moment, he added, "I
think Brittany cleaned and prepared the back bedroom for our guests."
"Very good,
sir.”
“Sirs, " he
said, looking first at Jim, then Blair and then back at Jim, "I'll have
your luggage to you in a few minutes."
"Do you need any
help?" Blair jumped in, suddenly
wishing to delay going into the house and up to the bedroom with Jim.
Patrick smiled, fully
aware of a diversionary tactic when he saw one, said simply, "No, thank
you. You best go with your
partner. Putting it off won't make it
go away." He nodded toward Jim
waiting for him on the steps.
"He's waiting for you."
"Come on, Chief,
move it,” Jim called, motioning impatiently, holding the door open.
Walking slowly up the
stairs, Blair scooted past Jim into the entryway. Glancing to his left, he saw the living room and down the hall,
what looked like a kitchen where Vin just came from carrying a glass of
something.
Handing the glass to
Jim, Vin asked, "Blair, would you like something to drink? We have…”
He was suddenly
interrupted by the sound of someone running down the stairs. Glancing up, he glared at the sound. A second later, rounding the corner and
coming to view on the landing was a grinning young man hurrying down the
stairs. His feet barely touched the runners, as he hung from the banister and
swung off unto the floor.
"JIM! BLAIR!" he yelled, happily. "You're here! Finally!"
Skidding to a stop at
the bottom, he was caught and held tightly by his partner.
"Little boy,”
the gruff voice would have frozen others to the spot, “you are supposed to be
contemplating what you did yesterday.” Vin said sternly.
A flash of a pout
crossed his face, "No, you said to stand there for 30 minutes, it's been
30 minutes,” he said as if talking to a slow-witted child. Breaking free with the slightest show of
irritation, he gave Jim a hug.
"Jimbo! It's great to see
you again. It's been way too long. What? Seven, eight years? Boy, I can't wait for you to see Hell! So much has changed and it's improved and…”
he stopped suddenly as Vin grabbed him again.
"Damien, take a
breath,” he said calmly with a trace of humor. "Let's not forget our
manners." Turning to Jim, shaking
his head for lack of comprehension, he said, "I tell him to be home at a
certain hour and he acts like the concept of time is a foreign one. I tell him
he is standing in the corner for thirty minutes, and he knows when he has been
there fifteen seconds too long."
Jim laughed,
"Hi, Day, it’s good to see you again, too. I'd like to introduce…"
"BLAIR!"
the young man interrupted, pulling away from Vin again. The older man stared at
his empty hand as though realizing for the time how hard his prize was to hold
onto.
Blair laughed,
catching the enthusiasm, "DAY!" he yelled back.
The two quickly
started talking to each other at once, hands flying, words and voices mixing
together into a deafening roar, especially in the small entranceway.
Vin and Jim stood
next to each other, smiling at their partner's excitement. Jim's ears perked up as he heard Day say
something about wanting to show Blair the sights and his lover eagerly reply
that they should go soon, as in a few minutes.
“Blair…” he called
out, warningly.
Blair glanced at him
with a mixture of embarrassment and anger.
"No!" Jim
cut off all objections, shaking his head. "You and I have some business to
discuss and I want you to lie down for a couple of hours."
"And you, young
man," Vin said, picking up that Jim had overheard the two make plans to go
out, "are still in trouble. We are
not through discussing your latest actions."
"Jim,
nooooo! I want to go out." Blair
said in a whiny voice, throwing his best puppy dog eyes at his lover.
"Vin, come on,
forget it. I said I was sorry.
" Day said at almost the same
time, face set in a classic pout.
Walking over and
gathering Day in his arms, Vin kissed him on the forehead, "I'm sure you
are but we are not done discussing it, yet.
Don't make a scene in front of Jim and Blair, little boy," he added
warningly.
"Now, take Blair
upstairs and show him where he and Jim will be sleeping for the next few days
and then plant yourself back in the corner of the office. Don't move until I come up there, I won't be
long."
While Vin was quietly
talking to Damien, Jim had walked over to Blair. He was speaking gently to him, trying to avoid a full-blown
tantrum brought on by tiredness and uncertainty. "Blair, love, stop pouting," he ordered gently. "A few hours nap is not going to hurt
you. I'm not happy with your attitude
this morning, when you get to our rooms--- I'm going to be down here a few
minutes with Vin---I want you to pick a corner and stand there. Think about what you said and why and
collect yourself, I won't be long.
Promise." He kissed Blair
gently, "Okay?"
Blair nodded and
looked unhappy. The sound of a sharp
swat made him glance over at his new friend.
Day was standing there, rubbing his hip where Vin's hand had made
contact, nodding now in agreement, apparently convinced by the larger man’s
hand.
Flashing Blair a
smile, Day never lost a beat. Walking
to the stairs, he pulled his friend along. "Come on, it looks like we are
both in trouble. No sense making them
any madder.” Then, making sure he was
out of Vin’s reach, added with a laugh, “God knows they're grouchy enough as it
is."
The room was
tastefully appointed in various shades of blue with white accents. The dark
mahogany furniture was warm and inviting. Eyeing their luggage discreetly
placed on luggage racks near a tall armoire, Blair marveled at the quiet
efficiency of Mr. Patrick. Choosing a
corner three feet from the large window that overlooked the small garden and
other houses, he slightly turned allowing himself a birds eye view of green
vegetation, colorful flowers, and a small Japanese maple. A quick readjustment, a slight turn upon
hearing Jim and he would be within the ordained pre-punishment position,
contemplating his crimes as he studied the corner.
His thoughts eagerly
turned to Damien St. Claire. He was everything he expected him to be and more.
The vibrancy of the youthful spirits, the laughing eyes that spoke of mischief
and humor, the friendly acceptance that pulled Blair in as an old and treasured
friend, were all tributes to the warm and tender spirit Blair had detected in
the e-mails.
Vincent Cade was
another matter entirely. Blair had mentally braced himself over the long months
of correspondence with Damien for a frightful and formidable figure. Well, that
wasn’t the half of the image he had gleaned in the short time he had been in
the man’s presence. Vin carried himself like he was in full command of everyone
within his realm. The man’s appearance was a clear window to his thoughts and
the slightest attitude detected would no doubt crease the face with
displeasure. How the hell does Day put up
with him? Blair thought to himself. I
guess I should be thankful Jim isn’t like that.
Jim waited until the
two brats were safely ensconced behind closed doors, hopefully in their
respective corners before allowing himself the luxury of surrender.
Vin stood by watching
the blue eyes that carried a soft veil as they watched the young man he had
grown to love move up the stairs. There
was a tender quality to the tight lips, but even that could not hide the strain
his old friend was under.
Walking forward, Vin
took the glass and placed it on a table. He wrapped a strong arm around
Ellison’s shoulders and walked him over to a small loveseat near a clock in the
hall. Pulling him near, never saying a
word, only allowing the tired veteran of street wars to be at ease, Cade took
over. Ellison felt the strength of the
man beside him, the sureness of his place next to him, the easy knowledge of
knowing exactly what the detective needed; Vincent Cade was a man to seek
shelter with in any storm.
Jim slowly opened his
mouth, but the only sound that came out was a deep hitch. He cleared his throat
in embarrassment, eager to try again.
“Hush, not now. There
is plenty of time for baring your soul. Just accept that I’m in charge now.”
Ellison rested his
head on the larger man’s shoulder.
Vincent allowed him a few minutes to gain some composure, arms tightly
wrapped around tired shoulders. Then with an air of authority only those long
accustomed to command can deliver, he said, “Now, it’s up to your room and some
sleep. We have dinner reservations at
eight. We'll plan on serving lunch in
about two hours---that should be a nice rest.
Oh, and, Jim, my boy, you are not to leave the room until I call for
you. I think you need a nap as much as your brat does.”
The detective pulled
away and met the brown eyes gratefully.
He nodded his head, gave a warm smile and wearily trudged up the stairs
to deal with his petulant partner.
Hearing the heavy
footfalls in the hall, Blair turned towards the corner, as though deeply into
the punishment, contemplating his sins in solace. He heard the door open and close, as Ellison expelled a sigh. Blair’s heart ached for his friend and
lover. He really never should have put Jim through this, not when the vacation
was long overdue and the mental stress of the prior weeks detrimental to the
man’s health.
“Jim,” he started,
not turning around, “Jim, man, I’m sorry for the attitude. You don’t need this
right now, and I promise I won’t give you any more.”
Jim sat down on the
bed. Wearily he positioned the pillows
lower on the bed. “Come here, Chief,”
he beckoned the young man.
Blair turned, his expression
resigned to the possible punishment that awaited him.
“Come on, off with
the shirt and jeans.”
Blair stripped
quickly, not wishing to put up a scene with Vin and Day in the house, the
garden windows open, Mr. Patrick no doubt lurking about and who knew who else
was on staff. When he was only wearing
his boxers and a T-shirt, Jim patted his lap.
Blair came over and
eased himself face down over his lover’s thighs.
“Chief, I know you’re
tired, and I know most of the attitude was from the long flight, but you know
the rules and when I called you on it, you persisted. That earns you at least a
short refresher course.”
Reaching his fingers
into the waistband of Blair’s boxers he eased them down in one fluid motion to
his knees. “I’m sorry, Jim. You’re
right, I am tired.” Blair felt concurrence might earn him a lesser
sentence. He was right.
Jim raised his hand
and delivered a series of six sharp swats to the tender, white mounds. His
handprint emblazoned on the spheres, the warm heat of the stinging pain, and he
felt vindicated and dutiful. His guide had been brought back in line.
Blair felt the lack
of enthusiasm in each swat, the strained effort in each smack to deliver
repentance. After six blows, Jim eased him up and off his lap. “Now,” he said,
lifting Blair’s chin, pulling the downcast eyes to meet his own, “how about
that nap we talked about.”
Blair, thankful for
the gentle reprieve threw his arms around Jim and hugged him, “Man, I love you.
I love you so much.”
“I know, love, I
know.”
Within a matter of
minutes, Ellison stripped down to this own briefs and T and joined his guide in
the comfortable bed. Ellison’s
breathing evened out in a matter of minutes and a soft snore escaped his parted
lips. Blair snuggled into him, trying to get comfortable, not really feeling
much pain coming from his bottom, basically exhausted, he still could not find
sleep.
Thirty minutes later,
still energized with excitement, he quietly snuck out of the large bed.
Grabbing his jeans and shirt, his shoes and socks, he quietly tiptoed to the
door. The stealth of a Covert Ops
expert could not have mimicked the quiet exit.
The hallway was
quiet. There were three doors down the
corridor, one at the far end, one opposite the hall, and the other midway
between on the same side as their bedroom door. Laying his clothes and shoes on the top of the landing by the
wood banister, he remained in his boxers and T-shirt. Listening for any sounds coming from the first closed door, he
carefully opened it. It was a study, paneled in a dark, rich wood. There was a
desk in front of the window, neatly organized, a wooden paddle resting on a
small pile of papers. Pushing the door open more, he leaned his neck in and
peered along the wall finding the inside corner. There, standing quietly was
Damien, standing up straight and dutifully contemplating his sins, probably
because he thought it was his significant other checking on him. He, too, was
only in his boxers and a T-shirt. A small sob escaped him, and Blair almost
burst out laughing.
“Day, it’s me,” he
whispered. “How long do you have to stay there?”
The tall blond turned
from the wall, a smile forming on his lips, but Blair noticed the red, swollen
eyes, the running nose, and the red cheeks.
The hazel eyes were bright now as they looked up at his friend. Then as
though a mirror were reflecting a dark shadow, Day’s eyes glazed over, the
smile drooped almost comically, and a small “uh oh,” escaped his lips.
Blair tensed, feeling
the shape behind him.
“If he moves from
that corner before his time is up, he will get another thirty minutes tacked
on,” came the hard voice behind him.
Before Blair could
turn, he felt two strong hands on each shoulder. Glancing at Day, looking for
help, he realized none would be forthcoming. The experienced brat quickly
turned his head into the corner and sighed heavily, seemingly forsaking his
friend right now.
The hands slowly
backed Blair out of the room and pushed him against the hall wall. Vin closed
the door after giving one final look in to make sure his lover was following
his orders.
“I thought you were
told to take a nap, little boy,” Vin asked as though he were gently quizzing a
small child on how his day at school was. The large man now leaned both hands
against the wall, one on each side of Blair’s head, trapping him.
“I wasn’t sleepy.” He
didn’t know what else to say.
“Seems to me you were
due some punishment time as well. I hardly believe that could have been
conducted in so short a time.
Especially if your attitude earlier was any indication of what it was on
the plane.”
“Well, maybe Jim and
I have a different type of relationship than you and Day have,” Blair answered
coldly.
“Oh, I see,” came the
soft, gentle response. Vincent was speaking to him as though he was a confused
and lost little boy, and right now Blair felt like just that. This man confused
him, threw him off kilter. Even his powers of obfuscation seemed to fail him
when those brown eyes pinned him.
“Let me clarify
something for you, Blair, so that our time together can be enjoyable. I feel
the best way for people to be comfortable with each other is to set the
guidelines beforehand. Do you agree? Don’t you think understanding is the key
to us all getting along?” The voice was getting softer and softer until Blair felt
a chill run down his spine. He was being led to slaughter like a lamb and he
knew it and was at a loss how to avoid it.
“Yes, I think I
understand completely,” was the only response he could think of, said with
enough sarcasm to make him wish he could bite his tongue off.
“I don’t like
smart-mouthed brats who don’t listen. And I don’t like lovers who manipulate
for their own selfish needs, ignoring what their partners are going through. So
I’m going to give you a choice. You can go quietly back to your room, get your
butt into bed and take that nap Jim told you to, or----or, my little boy, you
can march right back into that office, where I will talk to you about actions
and the consequences of them over my knee. You can then join Damien in the
opposite corner.”
Blair’s eyes widened,
his mouth fell open and he could only gape at the threat.
Vincent pushed off
from the wall, allowing Blair an avenue of escape. He watched as the young, curly-headed man, cautiously slid out of
his grasp.
Blair pointed an
unsure finger towards their bedroom and said in a humorous attempt, “I think
I’m a little sleepy right now. That nap sounds about right.”
As soon as he cleared
the danger zone, he rushed forward, grabbed his clothes and quickly went back
into their bedroom, quietly closing the door behind him.
Placing his clothes
on a chair, he eagerly slid back into bed, beside his sleeping lover. Putting
his arm around Jim, he luxuriated in the warmth the man generated, easing the
chill from his spine, the imprint of dread that Cade had left him.
Man, that guy is so mean. I feel sorry for Day. I don’t know how such a fun-loving guy could love anyone like that. I’m just glad Jim isn’t so strict.
As though reading his
thoughts, Ellison came groggily into the day. “What’s the matter, Chief? Why’s
your heart racing?” The detective tried to open his eyes and focus, but he was
having a hard time of it.
“Nothing, Jim, go
back to sleep. I just had to use the bathroom and I got lost,” he said, as he
willed his heart to slow down.
“Chief,” Jim said
slowly, licking his lips to remove the film of sleep, “they just drive on the
wrong side, the bathrooms are still indoors. “ Jim smiled at his weak attempt
at humor.
“Yeah, man, very
funny.”
Then he added, very
quietly, “Don’t mess with him, Chief, he doesn’t play around.” With that final piece of advice, Jim pulled
Blair closer to him. Soon Ellison was
snoring softly. Blair thought he would never sleep again, but the contentment
he felt in Jim’s arms, the reassurance, soon had him following close behind.
“Hey, Chief, come
on,” Jim Ellison said, as he finished buttoning his sports shirt. “Lunch is
ready and you were all eager for sightseeing before.”
Yawning and
stretching, his young companion looked delectable lying there all warm and
foggy and pliant. Lunch was the
farthest thing from Ellison’s mind, but he knew the wakeup call from Day was a
directive from Vin. No refusals to eat would be tolerated.
“Blair, Vin gave us
ten minutes to get our butts down there.”
As though some magic
wand was waved, Sandburg jumped out of bed.
Dressing quickly, he followed closely behind Jim as they left the room.
The back terrace was
part of a small walled in garden area along the alleyway. Room enough for a
table and four chairs, and a side cart for serving. There was a large array of fruits, cheeses, muffins, and a tray
of small sandwiches.
Day was already
happily munching away on a muffin topped with jam and a large slice of cheese
on his plate. “Blaaaar, Jim,” he tried
to get out around the contents of his mouth.
Vincent sent him a
corrective scowl, but Day merely shrugged and continued his welcome, “Cumeet,”
then picking up a sandwich from his own plate, he showed it off like a trophy.
“Look, Cucumber sandwiches…. I just had to have cucumber sandwiches for you
guys."
“Demon, enough with
the cucumber sandwiches,” then by way of apology to Jim and Blair for their
exclusion in the joke, he clarified, “Day has been telling me how most British
plays have always had cucumber sandwiches served. They just happen to be a
favorite of his, so we have cucumber sandwiches…enough for an army I’m afraid.”
Jim chose a chair
between Vin and Day, leaving the opposite side of the table for Blair. He
noticed how the young man stood close to him, unsure of leaving his side.
Looking up he caught a look pass between Vin and Blair.
“Chief, would you rather sit here?” Jim
asked, rising slightly.
“Hey, no man, I’ll
sit over there,” he started to move around Day, but the blond haired man rose
before anyone could say a thing. He
quickly took the chair closest to the wall and Vin and reached over to pull his
treasured plate in front of him.
“He bit me already,”
Day said laughing, “ and I’ve had my rabies and tetanus.”
The small joke broke
the tension and even Vincent Cade broke out into a huge grin, shaking his head
at Ellison in a see what I have to put up
with sort of way.
The rest of the meal
was easy. Jim and Vin kept to their own conversation of old friends and current
events. Day and Blair listened most times, but every so often would break off
into a discussion of their own about sights to see and things to do. By three o’clock, Blair was bouncing in his
chair eager to hit the streets of London.
All four men pitched
in to clean up the lunch. Dinner was scheduled at Vin’s club for eight. That
gave them at least four hours of free time out on the streets of London.
“Jim, you have to see
the gallery,” Day said. “I’ll bet you can’t guess how popular VC’s Conceptual
Chaos paintings are.”
“Damien, let’s not
talk about that,” Vin said.
Blair could have
sworn the older man looked embarrassed.
Eager to peel some
layers off of the formidable figure, Blair persisted, “What paintings?”
“Haven’t you ever
heard of VC?” Day asked, showing little patience in his tone for anyone who
hadn’t.
“Yeah, isn’t he that
abstract painter all the art critics are always talking about? I hear he can
take any idea and paint a picture around it. Of course, being abstract, you can
just about see anything you want to…” noting the look that came across Vin’s
face, Blair turned to Day for guidance.
The young man was
laughing, “Oh, Blair, you are absolutely right and for that reason Vin hates
them.”
“Well, I hear he’s
popular. He must be making big bucks on those things, but I don’t call it art.”
Blair was still quite clueless.
“Blair,” Jim tried
for a save, it was time he helped his friend, “VC is Vincent Cade.”
Blair’s face paled a
light shade of gray. He grimaced, “Oh, hey, man, I didn’t realize, I mean, I
didn’t mean anything, I’m sure they’re really very…”
“Blair,” Vin’s face
softened, “it’s okay. They are trash and I feel ashamed to make money off of
them. This little Shylock has made quite a name for his gallery selling those
paintings and I can assure you, if it were not for him, I would not do another
one of them.”
Day shrugged his
shoulders, looking for all the world like someone who didn’t care what Vincent
Cade felt about his paintings.
“They keep Hell
burning bright for you, Vin, I think that should earn them a place of honor if
nothing else.” Damien seemed to have touched a nerve with the older man. His
face creased into a deep frown.
“Yes, they give me
Halcyon Heights and for that I should be grateful.”
Whatever passed
between the two men was unreadable, but Blair saw a look of love and devotion
ignite between them that said whatever it was, it was lasting and strong.
The next two hours
went by pleasantly. They walked the streets of London taking in the sights and
sounds of the bustling city. The Tower of London was the only sight time
allowed, but there would be more time tomorrow and the next day before leaving
for Salisbury.
They had their cab
drop them several blocks from home in front of a discrete building, the small
sign displayed on the door reading, "The Art Critic".
Day unlocked the
small shop and stood aside with a wide, proud grin upon his face. Blair could
see the love the young man had put into the little gallery. No more than thirty
pictures stood upon easels or were mounted upon the wall, but each one was lit
or positioned for maximum effect and advantage.
Along the right wall,
in a place of honor were two abstracts, brightly colored, sharp lines edging
into each other, pinpricking the nerves with their pointed crispness. A tastefully discreet sign above the pairing
said: “VC’s Concepts in Chaos.”
Blair moved quickly
to the paintings and studied them.
“Not something you
would expect from me, I assume?” The heavy, deep voice came from Blair’s left.
Straightening, a bit
unnerved, he shifted from foot to foot. “I guess you just don’t look like a
painter, period.”
“Actually I do
paint,” he said.
Blair gave him a
quizzical look.
The large man smiled,
“I mean besides these monstrosities.
Come, I will show you.”
Extending a friendly
arm around Blair’s shoulders he pulled the young man towards the back of the
gallery. Blair nervously looked for Jim who was admiring some landscapes in the
back. Vin drew Blair up beside the
other two men.
“This is my passion.”
Vin pointed to the landscapes. They were exquisitely detailed. The British
landscape was captured in soft strokes that seemed to actually make the trees
appear to be bending in the wind. Lighting almost like the morning mist still
lingering over the craggy cliffs and ocean views faintly softened the lush
green countryside.
Blair didn’t know art
as well as his college professors had hoped he would, but he knew talent when
he saw it. Vincent Cade was a shadowman. He was fragments of color and shading
that were far more than met the eye.
“This is good,” Blair
stated in a shocked voice.
The three other men
laughed.
“I keep telling him
that, but he won’t believe me. These
things would sell faster than he could paint them if he’d let me tell everyone
that he is VC,” Day said, wagging a finger at his significant other.
“Little boy, you know
what happens when you try to deal my paintings without permission.” The warning was obvious in the statement.
However, the blond
man was not put off by the formidable figure.
He merely shrugged. “I had a good price for it; you just won’t see
reason.”
Realizing rudeness in
the discussion by excluding their guests, Day chose to enlighten them. “Vin
does portraits of me, too, showing off my full glory.” Then laughing he winked
at Jim and Blair, “If you get my drift.”
Vin came up alongside
Damien. Placing a restraining arm around his shoulder, he slowly arched it
highly ensnaring the neck; trapping the laughing young man in a chokehold he
pushed his head forward, rubbing his head.
“Those paintings are private
gifts…for our viewing only, my little Demon.”
Releasing the wild locks to the ministrations of his lover, he allowed
the younger man to stand straight.
“The brat, here,
decided to try to sell one of the paintings I’ve done of him. He had a buyer and
surreptitiously brought the painting into London. I happened to receive a call
yesterday evening from a good friend who recognized Damien here. He called to let me know that my partner was
poising al natural for someone. It
seems he had an American friend over here who had just purchased the
picture. Needless-to-say, I was a bit
put off by the robbery, I am buying the picture back from him and been forced
to give the brat a lesson in the consequences of pilfering artwork.”
“Jim, Blair, it’s not
like that at all. The buyer was from the U.S. No one would have recognized me;
it was so vague, it might as well be a friggin abstract. It was just bad luck that someone who knows
me saw it.”
“Your mouth, little
boy,” the only warning needed to make Day mumble, “sorry.”
“It’s just that we’ve
been trying to reach the States and even if the landscapes don’t appeal to the
Americans, the nudes would have. It would have been a great way to get our foot
in the door,” Damien persisted, deeply annoyed by the lack of appreciation for
his efforts.
Ellison moved in to
set things back to the pleasantness of the afternoon. “Vin seems to be doing
rather well over here. Perhaps a large American market will decrease the
mystery and rarity of owning a Vincent Cade landscape.”
“Well, it worked with
the VC’s, but he don’t care about them. He pushes them off like they are some
form of prostitution. His treasured landscapes are too limited by the region.
He needs to travel to America and do some landscapes there. The nudes would
have been a great introduction to the Yankees.” Damien said, directly to his lover, and walked a bit away
slightly worried that he would be re-educated right in the gallery.
“Day, now is not the
time to bore our guests with our domestic concerns. Enough, right now.”
Vincent, the authoritarian, had spoken. The subject was closed.
Jim put an arm around
Blair as Day headed for the street in a bit of a huff. Vincent followed the
group and locked up when they reached the stoop.
Day turned from his
place in the lead and with the late afternoon sun gilding his head, making him
look angelic, he returned to his good cheer. “Blair, how’s about we go off and
check out the shops?”
Vin watched as Day
took over. Amazed as usual by the ease with which he could change from night to
day. So appropriate a nickname for him, he
thought, but then so is Demon.
“Off with you both,
then,” Vin said. “Back at the flat by seven. Do I make myself clear?”
Day grinned, grabbed
Blair’s arm and pulled the confused young man along. Blair waved at Jim as he
was swept along in the tide. Jim laughed and blew him a kiss. “Have fun.”
Vin roared, “DO I?”
And Damien St. Claire trotting along with his captive in tow merely gave a
backward and childish wave in answer.
“I swear, Jim, there
are days it’s a wonder he lives to see the sun set.” Cade’s voice lost all
threat in the soft and amazed wonder of his obvious love for the young man.
"Blair, I'm in
deep trouble." Day whispered, leaning in toward his new friend as they sat
in a small coffeehouse on a busy street.
"What's
wrong?" Blair asked, also whispering but not exactly sure why.
"Last Monday, I
was doing a little …. um …. cleaning and I found a ring that Vin was going to
give me on our anniversary next month."
Blair interrupted, "Cleaning
or snooping?" he asked with a laugh, knowing which it probably was.
Day colored slightly,
"Well" he hedged, "Vin would say snooping, I would say I was
just looking around."
"Around
where?" the other man asked with a
laugh, enjoying his friend's discomfort and knowing it could be just as easily
him in the situation.
"In his drawers,
but that is totally beside the point." Day looked around the café
carefully as if expecting to see Vin or Jim walking in. "I was so excited about the ring, I
mean, it is sort of like this outward sign that I belong to him, that he is
telling the world that I am his and he is mine and …." Day trailed off,
embarrassed by his emotions.
"Sorry, I'm sure that seems silly to you, but it's important."
"No, not at
all. I understand, man."
"So, I was
excited and I wanted to wear it but I knew I couldn't actually wear it, so I
put it on a chain and wore it around my neck."
"Ok, so did Vin
find out? Is that what you are in
trouble for? I would think that if he
had found out already, he would have dealt with it."
"Oh yeah, trust
me, I mess up, I know about it immediately.
No, the thing is, I lost it," Day finished on a sad note.
"You lost
it! How could you loose it?"
"I don't
know!" Day said defensively, "I was in trouble and Vin was making me
work out in the garden doing all this crap for him and when I came back in
hours later, it was gone, the chain was broken and I guess it fell off
somewhere."
"Did you look
for it?"
"Boy, Blair,
what a great idea!" Day said sarcastically. "No, I'm sorry, I'm just upset. Yes, I looked, I've spent every free second I have on my hands
and knees looking but I haven't found it.
Vin thinks I'm insane."
Blair laughed,
imagining the other man's thoughts about his lover spending time on this hands
and knees walking through the gardens.
"What did you tell him you were doing?"
"Treasure
hunting." Then at Blair's raised
eyebrows, he added, "Hey, it's not that stupid, we have actually found
some semi-precious stones and a bracelet on the property in the gardens when we
were digging. We don't know if they are
from the original owner of the house, the bracelet is from the Fifteenth
Century. I sort of like to imagine some
lady hiding it from raiders during the War of the Roses or something,” Day
finished, laughingly.
"Okay, so Vin
thinks you are treasure hunting."
"Yeah, except he
has given me strict orders to stop wasting my time. We got into a big fight about it on the car ride up here. He laid down the law and I didn't take it too
well."
"So, what are
you going to do? I hate to say it, but
it sounds like this thing is gone for good."
"Nope! "
Day said excitedly, " I have a plan but I need your help." Then flashing a smile that said 'trust me',
he added, 'We won't get in any trouble and it's only going to take a few
minutes, an hour, tops."
"I don't know,
Day….." Blair said, uncertain, "What are we going to do?"
'Come on, I'll show
you." Tossing some bills down on
the table, he grabbed Blair's arms and almost dragged him out of the café and
down the street.
Five minutes later,
they stood on a small side street, with little traffic. Day looked up and down the street, like a
spy in an old James Bond movie, full of secrets and hidden motives. Opening the
door to the small shop, he pulled Sandburg in before he could even get a
glimpse of what was in the shop window.
The shop was
basically a hardware store. There were many pieces of equipment that Blair
could just not place. Looking up over
the counter in the rear, he saw the sign, “Treasure Chest.”
Damien walked proudly
over to a strange looking object. At first Blair thought it was a crutch of
some sort. It had a circular end that fit along one’s arm for support. The long
crutch then bent into a flat, round piece that looked like a satellite dish.
“Here it is,” Day
said proudly, standing back to watch Blair’s appreciation of the item.
“What the hell is
that?” Blair asked.
“That, my friend, is
The SHADOWx2”
“The what?” Blair
still gawked.
“The SHADOWx2 is 32
ounces of tough, sophisticated muscle, custom built for high performance and
designed for basic and simple operation,” Day read the small sign under the
displayed object.
“What’s it for?”
“That, my friend, is
for finding lost treasures---or rings as the case may be.” Day now rubbed his
hands together gleefully, a man so satisfied and smug, it bode an ill wind for
the pair.
As the two young men
entered the front door, at a little past seven, Blair carried the carefully
wrapped package. It took Damien a full twenty minutes to convince Blair to help
him in his scheme.
“Vin has me on a
tight budget. Any purchase over a
hundred pounds needs his authorization and approval. If you could buy this,
Blair, charge it to your credit card, I swear, buddy, I will pay you back over
three weeks, you'll have your money back before you even leave.”
The hazel eyes had
pleading down to a craft, skillfully somber and longing, he played Blair like
an instrument. The purchase made, the promises reiterated, and there was still
more to the game.
“Okay, now if you can
just take it with you. Tell Vin you bought golf clubs for Jim and it’s a secret
if he asks. Man, he’ll buy that one. The package is wrapped nicely, he’ll never
suspect.”
“Day, I just don’t
feel right lying to my host. I mean, I’m his guest, he’s Jim’s best friend,
this just doesn’t seem right.” Then pausing, he shook his head for a moment
disbelieving that he could actually admit it, “Besides, he scares me.”
Day burst out
laughing. “Hell, he scares me, too, why the hell do you think I’m asking you to
transport the damn thing.”
At the logic of his
admittance, Blair burst out laughing, too. The joy and camaraderie had sealed
their partnership, but also their fate.
The two young men
were able to dress and present themselves in the small parlor room without the
slightest questions or suspicions thrown their way. No doubt Jim and Vin,
having returned early from the London trip, had spent some time talking in
Vin’s office.
Patrick pulled the
car up in front of the small townhouse and the four sharply dressed men got in.
Patrick exited the driver’s seat and Vincent Cade took over.
“Have a nice dinner,
sirs,” Patrick said as he stood aside and waved. The sleek Sedan quietly sped away.
The Club was British,
all male, and quite stodgy. Jim seemed uncomfortable initially, but soon
relaxed.
Day seemed not in the
least perturbed, and was his usual chattering self. On the way to their table,
he made several side trips to greet friends and would have made many more,
Blair thought, if Vin had not taken him firmly by the arm and made him walk
beside him.
They were shown to a
small alcove with a cut glass bay window. The frosted, colored and beveled
glass did not allow them a view, but the streetlights filtered in with a warm
glow. Several tables away, a stone
hearth blazed with a warm fire, well appreciated on the cool fall evening. Poking Blair’s ribs several times he made
hilarious comments about some of the older gentlemen who were seated in the
small, well-appointed room. Dark wood bordered the domain that smelled of
tobacco and leather and the enticing aroma of gourmet food.
“It is a selfish and
foolish dream, Jim,” Vin said, completely aware of the affectation of it all.
“What?” Ellison
seemed to be lost by the thread.
“This,” he passed his
massive hand around in a gesture encompassing the whole club. “When I came here, it was the only place I
felt safe. Like being accepted here made me feel like it was my country. I know
how foolish such pretension must seem to you, but it is merely a sanctuary.
I’ve learned much here about formality, expectations and the appreciation of
the simple things,” he finished, looked lovingly over at his animated lover.
No one would have
believed the chattering young man was listening, but apparently he always
cocked an ear towards his older lover. “Vin needs affirmation. I don’t. I
wouldn’t love him so much, except I know he’s still home country, still a grass
roots American Yankee deep down inside.”
Vin stared at his
lover, as if first seeing him in his full glory, a small amazement in his eyes
at the astute observation.
“My little demon
speaks the truth. It is a failing of mine, this need for acceptance here, but
Day is slowly converting me to the cruder aspects of life.” Then Vin winked at
Jim and all four men laughed.
The meal was
delicious. Vin and Jim both opted for the prime rib dinners, with baked
potatoes, and peas. Damien went with
pork chops with mushroom-bread pudding while Blair decided to try Shepherds
Pie. Well sated after the meal, a fine
desert of poached pears topped off their sweet tooth.
“How about an after
dinner drink?” Vin asked. Taking the nodding heads of the two young men as
confirmation and with Jim’s agreement, brandy snifters soon rested before each
member of the quartet.
“Blair, what did you
two do after we left the gallery?” Jim asked, finally having a moment to catch
up with his lover on the time they were apart.
Turning his head down
deeply into his brandy, Blair avoided meeting Jim’s eyes, remembering all too well
the rules and Number 2, no lying. “We
walked up and down the residential section. Some of those shops are amazing,
Jim. Lots of Old World charm here.”
“More than just
charm, Blair,” Damien eagerly caught the ball, “history. I guess I never saw England for much of
anything except a country that spoke English and we beat in the Revolution, but
since living here for the past nine years, I’ve come to appreciate its history.
I can’t wait to show you Stonehenge and Salisbury Cathedral. You are going to flip
if its Old World charm you want.”
“Little boy, I don’t
think Blair will flip. He’s a well-traveled young man. I’m sure an
anthropologist is well used to seeing the history in any place he visits,” Vin
complimented the curly-headed young man.
“Tell me, Blair, how
is it you and Jim first met,” Day asked, sitting back and nursing the brandy,
finally seeming to downshift for the first time.
Blair quickly looked
at Jim, questioning how much these men knew.
“Blair was
researching police structures for his dissertation. My captain, Simon Banks,
and I both decided his astute eye for cultural diversity could come in handy in
finding motive and ritual in many of the ethnic crimes we deal with daily,” Jim
averted the disaster.
Although Vincent Cade
was well aware of Jim’s senses, Damien was in the dark. The ex- Lt. Colonel did
not feel a soul as excitable as Damien’s could handle such knowledge without
the enthusiasm that might cause disaster.
Cade kept a firm grasp on his lover and very little got through to the
blond man that was not first passed by him.
"Wow," Day
said impressed, "that's got to be exciting. More adventure than's around here."
“Let’s just say,
Blair, that Damien’s view of the world can oftentimes cause fires. I’m afraid
my young friend sees magic in places others only see dirt and cobwebs. Where you are a police observer doing a job,
Damien would see a dynamic fighting duo, somewhat crossed between Batman and
Robin and Hercules and Iolus,” Vin said, lifting his brandy glass towards his
lover. The hazel eyes were now glaring at him.
“I’m not a child,
Vin,” Damien pouted, as he sat further back slumping now into the soft leather
chair.
“Posture, brat, sit
up straight.” Vin’s tone sharpened.
“I’m relaxing,” Day
said, sulkily, making no effort to right himself.
“One,” the count was
started softly. It was not the voice that Vin had used throughout the meal of
friendly warmth. This voice was cold with an undercurrent that almost sent out
electrical friction.
Blair involuntarily
jerked himself up. Jim smiled watching the reaction in his partner. Day
slouched deeper, taking another slow sip of his brandy, defiance in his eyes.
“Twooooo,” was
softer, drawn out in a languid promise.
It was the slow
easing of Vin’s glass towards the table and the inevitable “three” that was
nearly forming on his lips that caused Day to position himself upright, pull
his chair in, and pout down into the golden liquid.
“When we get home,
Demon, we will discuss the necessity for two, in detail.”
Damien tipped his snifter
back and downed the remainder of his drink.
Slouching forward now he crossed his arms on the table and laid his head
down on them. Blair saw it as surrender and looked over at Jim, then at Vin. He
could not believe the firm hand the older man used on his friend.
“Damien forgets
himself sometimes. We talk and his memory comes back,” Cade explained.
The remainder of the
evening went by quickly. They sat for
another hour talking, catching up on things. Day’s mood changed back to
amicable ease. Oftentimes during the evening, Blair wondered at the
relationship between the ex- Lt. Colonel and the activist. There was surely more to it than the
relationship he was trying to accept for himself with James Ellison.
Later that night,
Blair lay in Jim's arms, his head resting on the larger chest beneath him. Jim was slowly stroking his hair.
"I'm sorry I was
such a brat this morning, love. You're
tired and really don't need me adding more stress and problems. I won’t get into any trouble this trip, I promise."
"That's okay,
it's over, don't worry about it. Let's
just enjoy these next few weeks and relax." Jim gave a small laugh before adding, "Don't make promises
you are going to have a hard time keeping, Chief. I think you and your buddy are going to be getting into all sorts
of things."
Looking up, Blair
tried to decide if his feathers should be ruffled by the prediction or just
accept it for an obvious truth. Day’s
playful attitude seemed as genuine as in his e-mails and Blair didn’t doubt for
one moment that the energetic imp would have a hard time staying out of trouble
for two days. "I don't know, Jim,
if I had Vin watching what I did, I think I'd be an angel. What was that all about at dinner
tonight? What sort of relationship do
they have? It's a lot different than ours," Blair said.
"They have a
relationship that fits their needs---both of their needs. It's not up to you or me to judge it."
"I know,"
Blair said quietly, snuggling up closer to Jim. "I wonder what happened to Day tonight? I hope he's okay."
Jim cocked his head
slightly to one side, "He seems fine.
Remember that Day is choosing his relationship as much as you are
choosing yours."
"Did Day get in
trouble tonight?"
"Yes," Jim
answered simply
"Did he get
spanked?"
"Yes. Chief, this really isn't our business."
"I know, but I
can't help but think about it."
Before he could say
another word, Blair found himself lying on his back, with Jim pressed on top of
him, faces inches apart.
"Weeeellllllllllll,"
Jim said with a large hungry smile on his face, "I bet I can get your mind
off it."
Blair laughed, his
own smile reflecting Jim's. It had
been several weeks since they had much more time, or Jim had enough energy for
anything other then a quick grope and Blair missed this side of their
relationship. "I don't know, man,
you are going to have to work pretty hard at…."
The rest of his words
were swallowed as a hard mouth captured his, tongue plunging deep.
Two more days in
London, mostly sightseeing, and Vincent was eager to return to Halcyon
Heights. Blair and Jim agreed that the
country would be a welcome change from the hustle and noise of the city. They decided to leave Saturday morning.
Jim walked wearily
down the stairs, frustrated and annoyed with himself for still being
tired. Determined not to put a damper
on Blair’s holiday, he smiled as he rounded the landing and started down toward
the main level of the town house.
Jim saw Vin standing
by the door speaking with Patrick about when they would return to London and a
few minor repairs to be taken care of.
Damien had managed to pop the soap dish free from the tile wall that
morning and a workman needed to be called in to repair it. He looked up at the sound of footsteps.
Vin caught the tired
angles of Jim’s face, the long drawn creases around the eyes that made him look
spent.
“Morning,” Jim said,
“Have you seen Blair around anywhere?”
“Good morning, and
yes, your brat and my brat took off a few minutes ago with strict instructions
to be back within thirty minutes. Looks to me like some caper, too much
whispering bodes an ill wind with Day.”
Vin paused for a moment, remembering the looks on the their faces, “If I
know Damien, they are up to something; they both looked suspiciously
discomfited.”
Jim laughed, “Well,
I’m sure we’ll find out sooner or later what they’re up to. Sandburg doesn’t
wear guilt very well.”
Vin laughed, knowing
that he was right. “Come and have
breakfast. Day, with his wonderful
sense of timing, won’t drag Blair back until their thirty minutes are seconds
away from being up.”
“Oh, that’s okay, I’m
not really hungry. I think I’ll just go
sit out in the gardens until they get back.”
Turning quickly, not wanting to hear the ‘you need to eat’ order from
Vin, he walked swiftly down the hall to the kitchen, disappearing through the
swinging door.
Patrick raised an
eyebrow at the disappearing figure as Vin opened his mouth, about to make the
comment that Jim knew he would. Then,
seemingly to think of a different tactic, he hesitated.
As they finished
their conversation about the house, Patrick asked in a conversational tone, “I
wonder if I might suggest a good tailor while you are in Salisbury for Mr.
Ellison, I’ve noticed that his slacks seem a bit loose, as if he’s lost weight
recently. Heavens know why, he is
barely anything but muscle and bones now.”
Vincent looked at
him, “Point taken and one I agree with.
Let’s see if we can’t do something about that problem.”
After loading up a
tray with breakfast foods and two glasses of juice, Vin carried it to the
garden and set it on the table. Jim was
relaxing on a small swing near a rose arbor.
“That’s a lot to
eat,” Jim commented, trying to add humor to a battle he knew was around the
horizon, “better watch it or Day will start getting wandering eyes.”
Crooking a finger
towards Jim, he beckoned the man towards the table. “Cut the crap for me, Jim,
you know exactly who this is for.”
Sighing, the other
man complied and settled himself in a chair across from Vin. He watched dispassionately as the older man
filled a plate with several muffins, fruit and opened a small container of
yogurt.
Stirring the yogurt
as though for a child, Vin held out the spoon and the container, he waited for
Jim to take it. Several seconds passed,
neither man speaking---each engaged in this small battle of wills.
“James, you have two
choices, both involve eating this breakfast. One comfortably seated, the other
not so comfortably. Your choice, but I might add that I’m not in the most
patient of moods this morning.”
"Those are some
choices," Jim mumbled taking the yogurt, “and since when have you ever
been in a patient mood.”
"Young man, I
really don't think you want to be getting an attitude this morning. Do you?"
Jim didn't say
anything, he simply stared into the creamy white mixture as if it held the
answers. "I don't know what I
want," he said quietly several minutes later.
It pained Vincent to
see the lost look on Ellison’s face. It was the look of a man who was not quite
certain who he was anymore. Vin had seen it on Jim’s face when he came to visit
after Peru, before he understood the spiking senses that oftentimes assailed
him---before the insightful anthropologist came into his life.
At that time, Jim had
been filled with remorse and guilt over the loss of his men in the jungle. The
assaulting senses were not issues with his last visit, but the knowledge that
something was not quite right with him plagued him into moody and hostile bouts
of antagonism. Vin met the antagonism head on and dealt with Jim appropriately.
Now another approach was needed at least until Jim could sort out some of his
chaotic emotions, fine-tune his thought processes to the clarification he
needed, as the events of the last month chipped away.
"Come here,
little boy," he said, rising. Grabbing Ellison by the upper arm he led the
compliant man to the small garden swing again. Sitting down, pulling the man
onto his lap he offered comfort in the familiar arms. Jim struggled slightly to
get free, to retreat back into his shell, safe and protected. A hard swat to his hip from Vin stopped his
struggling.
Vin slowly began to
rock the swing.
"Blair held me
like this on the plane coming over," the other man said out of the blue.
"Did
he?" Vin questioned. "Did you like it?"
"Yes, I could
relax. I knew he was there."
Not breaking the
motion of the swing, Vin asked quietly, "What do you mean, you knew he was
there? Where else would he be?"
Jim did not answer
for some time.
Vin allowed the
silence to engulf them, knowing that Ellison was seeking the answers on his
own.
"Gone. Kidnapped like the others. Afraid I would find him hanging, tortured
and I would be powerless to save him like I was powerless to help the
others," he answered in a quiet voice.
"That's right, you
were powerless to help them. The ones already dead. You’re a good detective.
You’ve told me that yourself. Even good detectives need time and clues to solve
crimes, to bring criminals to justice.
But you did help other ones. You
saved countless lives by catching the man. He would have gone on, kidnapping
and torturing and killing until he ran out of victims or interest or God only
knows what passion was fueling him. As long as there was a lucrative market for
these snuff films, he would have continued. Perhaps in time he would have taken
children."
Jim shivered, "I
don't want to talk about it right now.
Okay?" Jim asked, as though
he were a child asking to be dismissed from the dinner table.
“You will in time,
and I’ll be here for you.”
"I know. That thought has always kept me going,
especially before Blair," Jim smiled and tightened his arms around Vin's
chest. “I remember many times when a
thought kept me from taking action, one simple realization of ‘Vin would have
your butt over his knees in a second for this.’”
Vin laughed,
"Well, little boy," he said with a trace of humor and mock sternness,
"I will be more than happy to reinforce that message while you are here.
Just keep up the fast and see what happens."
They stayed on the
swing for several more minutes, lost in their own thoughts.
Jim sat up abruptly.
"They’re home."
Vin looked at his
watch. "What did I tell you,
twenty-nine minutes with thirty seconds to spare. That boy loves living on the
edge."
"Damien!"
he raised his voice, "Get out here, immediately!"
Both men stood up and
while they waited for the younger men's appearance, Vin looked pointedly at the
waiting food.
Jim smiled, walked
over and sat down. Reaching for a muffin, he cocked his head, tuning in to the
conversation in the house. Looking at
Vin, he said in a stage whisper, "Day is worried, he's asking Blair how
long they were gone." Laughing, he
added, “Blair says they were gone thirty-three minutes. I don't think you'd be too happy with what
Day is saying."
Vin grinned,
imagining the conversation and the excuses that his partner was going to come
up with.
The back door opened
slowly and a blond head peered out cautiously. A curly, darker head was just
visible behind him, wanting to see what was going on and offer support, but
also wanting to run if trouble was in the forecast.
Masking his face in
serious lines of concern, Vin crossed his arms. Looking pointedly at his watch
he tapped his foot.
Jim could hear a
small “Uh oh,” from the doorway as Day came out onto the small patio. His face
flashed a series of emotions, ending with a full-blown pout. "We're not
late, Vin. It's only been thirty
minutes."
Crooking his finger,
the stern-faced man beckoned the younger one near.
"Blair,"
Jim called out, motioning for his own partner to quit hiding in the house and
join them.
Day slowly and
reluctantly walked towards his lover.
Stopping just out of arm’s reach, he said again with conviction,
"We are not late. You need to get
your watch fixed if it says we're late because we aren't."
Blair watched Vin and
Day out of the corner of his eye as he walked over to Jim and sat down.
Still not coming
within Vin’s personal space, Day stayed safely on the perimeter, poised to run
if necessary. Suddenly an arm snaked out and grabbed his upper arm. Before he could offer protest, explanation
or plead for mercy, a resounding kiss covered his pouting lips. "I never said you were late, brat. I just missed you."
Laughing, Day
playfully smacked the larger man’s shoulder.
Wrapping his arms around the solid neck Day returned the favor. “Missed
you, too.”
Jim pulled Blair down
on his lap. Whispering softly in his
ear, "Did you miss me, love?"
"Nah, not for a
second."
Jim started to laugh,
but was cut short by the capture of his own mouth.
Pulling back a few
moments later, Blair smiled, smacking his lips for effect. "You taste like blueberries."
"Vin is making
me eat."
Blair threw a
grateful look towards Cade.
The brown eyes met
his in acknowledgment. Blair nodded his appreciation.
During their on-going
e-mail correspondence, Blair had learned a few things about Jim’s past. The
constant attention Vin directed towards Ellison, the concern for his health and
welfare were satisfying to realize. Everyone had someone, Blair thought, and I’m lucky I have Jim. It was satisfying to see that the past
relationship the two men had was still strong and Vin would not hesitate in
enforcing his own brand of retribution and guidance on those he felt needed it. Blair offered a silent prayer that he would
not fall into that category.
Thirty pleasant
minutes later, mutual agreement urged the four men towards the country.
"Look! There it is!" Day said excitedly,
motioning out his back window at a white shape in the distance.
"There's
what?" Blair asked, leaning over his back seat companion, "I don't
see anything." Then a second
later, he said, "Oh, wait. That
white building? Is that Hell?"
Day laughed and said,
"Yep, that's Hell. Trust me, it's
a lot nicer than my old minister told me though."
Blair laughed and the
two were off chatting and joking with each other again. There was a childlike
ease between the two young men.
Jim exchanged smiles
with Vin.
It’s good to see him so happy and alive, Jim thought, unlike
those other young people. Catching
himself falling into somber reflection, noting the concern that flashed his way
from the driver, he fortified himself with the beautiful landscape. "You
know, Vin, I will never figure out how you saw the house in the first
place. What, it's got to be ten miles
off the main road."
"I don't know
either, to tell you the truth. I was
just driving along, and I looked over and there it was." Vin glanced over and could understand what
Jim was saying. Even now, even knowing
what he was looking at and for, the house was not much more then a vague shape
of white set against a field of green.
Yet his memories of that day held the house bright and clear and
beckoning in the green grassy distance.
"Oh well, who
knows how he really found it." Day voiced in from the back, "His
overly romantic story of seeing it rising out of the mist is probably more from
his firm desire to be considered lord of the manor than the truth." Then laughing to take any sting out of the
words, he added, "Knowing Vin, he hired some realtors and had them
scouring the countryside looking for some little piece of property that he
could rule over." The younger man
leaned into the front seat and kissed the cheek of his lover who was trying not
to smile, feigning a look of annoyance at the defamation of his character.
"Little boy, sit
back and fasten your seat belt,” was the only comment.
From Blair’s seat
behind Jim, he could clearly see the smile and the love on the other man's
face. Day, for his part, didn't need to
see it, Blair could tell by the matching expression on the young man’s face
that he knew the abiding love was there.
The car pulled up to
the gate twenty-five minutes later.
"Wow! What a
great house," Blair said from the back seat.
"It was built around
1900 by some banker named, Ogden, who used it as a summer retreat." Vin
pulled under a porte-cochere at the front of the house. As they got out and
began to unload the luggage, Vin continued his history lesson. "The Ogden
family sold the house in the 1950’s to another couple, but the man died a
couple of years later and his widow lived here until about ‘86. She was old and really let it get run
down. Then after standing empty for so
long, it really got in bad shape, which made it even harder to sell. Plus, it's a big house and not that close to
town."
With everyone
pitching in, they were able to get everything out of the car. Walking to the front door and unlocking it,
Vin opened it grandly and bowed at his guests with a smile, "Welcome to
Halcyon Heights!" The pride and contentment etching his face brought
laughter to the other three men.
Day moved past Vin
with a smirk on his face. When he cleared target range, he yelled gaily,
“Better known as Hell!”
“Daaaameeeeeiiin,”
was the long-drawn out reproach.
Jim and Blair
followed Vin up the main staircase to the upper floors. Day made a beeline for the kitchen.
"I wasn't sure
what bedroom you would want. I was
thinking of the front one with the fireplace.
It has it's own bathroom. But,
if you want the one that overlooks the gardens, that's fine, too."
"No, I like
fireplaces,” Blair said eagerly, thoughts of romantic nights in mind.
“With the cost to
heat this place, I’m sure a fireplace will come in handy. If the owner of this
establishment fails to meet our needs, we’ll seek lodging elsewhere, Chief.”
"You know,
James," Vin yelled over his shoulder as he pulled the drapes back to bid
entrance to the bright sunlight, "I think that little comment jus earned
you KP duty in getting lunch ready."
Jim laughed,
"Why does that not surprise me?"
As they were putting
their bags on the bed, Day appeared happily munching on a cookie and carrying
several more. "Mrs. Tweedham just
made these and they are great." He held out several cookies for any takers.
Blair grabbed one.
"Day," Vin
said, "while Jim and I get lunch, why don't you show Blair around and try
to get him familiar with the house.
Okay?" Then looking at his
watch, he added, "No more cookies."
"Sure," he
replied around a stuffed mouth, crumbs falling from his lips.
Blair nodded in
agreement, curious to see and explore the house.
As the two would-be
cooks disappeared down the stairs to the kitchen, Day looked at Blair,
"So, let’s start up and work our way down?" he directed. Reaching
into his back pocket he pulled out a stash of cookies wrapped in a napkin and
divvied up the remaining treats.
"Sure, lead
on," Blair said, biting into one of the offered cookies, "you're
right these are great."
As the two men left
the bedroom, Day took on a serious British accent as he began his tour. "Come, come, no stragglers please. If you get lost, I will hold the white paper
napkin in the air, simply find the napkin and you will find me." He
lectured in imitation of all the tour guides in London who carried brightly
colored umbrellas for quick and easy tour group identification for lost
tourists. Unable to keep up the act,
they were soon laughing hysterically.
Down in the kitchen Jim and Vin looked up towards the ceiling, then at
each other. The boisterous pleasures from overhead put them in their own good
cheer.
Walking the short
ways to the end of the hall, Day opened the door to reveal a large room. “Not really sure what this room was used for
but now we just use it for storage. Vin keeps some of his extra canvases up
here; he paints down off the kitchen, in the old servants’ quarter. Which, judging by the space they had a bunch
of, back in the proper days of the gentrified.” Day said with exaggerated propriety.
"There are the
back stairs," Day said, pointing out a small hall with stairs running in
both directions. "They will take
you directly to the kitchen. The other
ones go up to the attic."
Continuing down the
hall, they passed the now occupied guestroom.
Day showed Blair the other bedroom they could have stayed in,
overlooking the terrace and gardens.
Walking past the main staircase, to the other side of the house, Day
opened up the door and gestured inside, explaining this was the master bedroom. The large room was warm and welcoming. The dark beige throw rugs on the hardwood
floor, the king-size bed covered in a hound’s-tooth bedspread, made the room
masculine, yet not overbearing.
Walking in, they went
through another door and into the tower room.
Day spoke with easy candor, "Vin doesn't believe in disciplining in
the bedroom, unless there are no other options."
"Yeah, Jim is
the same way."
“So of all places,
this used to be the old nursery. Vin says it’s rather like poetic justice. He
even had one of the contractors build that corner over there,” Day pointed to a
small desk fashioned between two bookcases, jutting out considerably from the
round room. “I keep a regular office for the gallery downstairs, but I have to
work up here if I have lines to write or something. You’ll notice with the work
station there are now two corners.”
Blair’s mouth dropped
open. “You mean he built that just so you’d have a corner to stand in?”
“Yep, Vin doesn’t
overlook a detail when my best interests are at stake.” Day could have said
this with bitter sarcasm, but Blair could only hear pride and love in the
explanation.
Proceeding down the
main staircase, they came into the great hall that cut the house in half. The
back, terraced gardens could be viewed as well as the porte-cochere through the
front entrance. The high ceiling with
exposed wooden beams gave old world grandeur to the house. Turning right, they
passed a small bathroom that overlooked the front drive.
The lower tower room,
under the nursery or Day’s discipline room, was a library. A large window
looked out the front of the house and bookshelves lined all the walls. A
beautiful antique desk was situated in front of the window.
The living room was
next and Blair decided that this was his favorite room. Stepping down into the
spacious area he moved towards the fireplace on the east wall. The mantel was a
collector’s dream; small figurines of cats littered every available space.
However, it was not clutter, but personality displayed, treasured items finding
a place for viewing.
“What’s with the
cats?” Blair asked.
“It’s sentimental,”
Day said, blushing slightly. “I broke a crystal cat when Vin first brought me
here. Everyone of those cats was a gift from Vin.” Day seemed a bit
embarrassed, but he eagerly segued into a save. “Which reminds me, you’ve yet
to meet Desi.”
With that said, he
proceeded to walk swiftly down the main hall, yelling, “Desi! Desi girl!”
Blair stood down the
step into the living room and watched his friend calling the strange girl’s
name. Until he saw Vin approaching from the other end, hands on hips, a stern
look upon his face. “Hell, Day, do you have to yell like that. The damn cat’s
probably outside.”
Blair took one look
back at the crystal, China and papier-mâché collection of cats and understood
completely. Racing after his friend, he
knew he had a lot to learn about his young friend and Vincent Cade.
The first day at
Halcyon Heights was relaxing. After
lunch, Day grabbed Blair’s arm and with the excuse of finding Desi, they headed
off towards the terraced gardens and beyond.
Jim and Vin cleaned up the kitchen and a barbeque was decided on for
dinner.
Vin had office work
to attend to and Jim decided to lounge on the terrace with a book, which
quickly turned into a nap in the warm sun.
The brats were eager
to explore, but more importantly set about their plans for ring hunting. The gazebo, old and in disrepair, made a
fine clubhouse of sorts. Damien sat on
the wooden bench, a sketch of the gardens and where he had been that day marked
on his lap. Blair sat on the railing,
swinging his legs nearby, offering commentary when necessary.
“Day, so where
exactly did you go? Where were you when
you noticed it was gone?” Then pausing,
looking back toward the house over the wide expanse of grass and gardens, he
sighed. “Chances of you finding something now are pretty slim.”
“I’m not giving up,
Blair. I need to find that ring. But –
we can’t tell Vin or Jim. He will kill
me. I’ve told him I think there’s buried
treasure in the lawn and that’s why I’ve been spending so much time out
here. He feels I’m being foolish and
told me to stop. Right now, with him
here, I’ve no choice but to obey. I
know I may never find it, but I’ve got to look. I’ll hate myself if I don’t find it.”
“Day, that does
remind me of something I was going to ask you?” Blair sounded hesitant.
“Sure, Blair, ask
away,” Damien encouraged.
“Well, it’s not
really my business, but Vin just seems like such a hard ass. I mean, Jim
doesn’t get on me the way Vin does you, about every little thing. I know I
couldn’t take that and I’m certainly glad Jim isn’t that hard with me.” Blair
sighed, reflecting his appreciation of having Jim Ellison for a lover.
Damien St. Claire
looked up at his new friend, anger passed quickly over his features, but then
he pursed his lips and seemed to consider the source. “Blair, you’re new at
this discipline thing. I know that, but you’re right - it really isn’t any of
your business.”
Blushing, Blair
mumbled “Sorry.”
Day smiled and
continued without anger, “Vin and I have exactly the kind of relationship I
need and he feels I need and I’ve never been happier. But, you know, it’s more than that,” he paused as if searching
for the right words to say what he was feeling, “I’ve never felt more loved,
more cared for, more cherished and more in control of my own life.”
Seeing Blair’s
quizzical expression, Day laughed. “Yes, control.” Smiling, at the past, he continued, “You see, when I first came
here--- to England and when I found Vin---I had a chip on my shoulder bigger
than all of the UK. I was testing waters right and left, I was fighting against
everything and anything I could. I had
even experimented in some pretty heavy D/s scenes, I even looked at getting
into a Master/slave relationship. I
needed something, someone, to give me balance in life, set up guidelines. I needed rules and structure, clear and
solid consequences that I couldn’t fight my way out of.”
Sandburg laughed, “Yea, I know about guidelines, Jim’s pretty good at setting
up rules, regulations and guidelines.”
“I’m sure he is and I
can see you’re benefiting from them, but with Vin and me it’s still different.
I don’t usually get warnings. I break a rule, I’m face down over his knee,
bare-bottomed being spanked. Not to mention
the hour in the corner for reflection. That’s just what I need though. I need
him to be strict with me, not give me any leeway or room to maneuver. If Vin warned me, he’d be warning me all
day, because I always push the envelope. It’s just me.” He shrugged his
shoulders as if those last three words explained the essence of
everything. “ It took us a little time
to get everything in balance, between what I think I need and what he knew I
needed. But, now, ” he said with a
smile, glancing back at the house, “we are good. Things are as they should be and we are both really happy. So, with all due respect, Blair, don’t draw
any conclusions about Vincent until you get to know him and, yes, me, a little
better.”
Blair nodded, pushing
his hair back behind his ear, “I’m sorry. I guess I don’t understand a lot of
things.”
“But you will,” Day
winked at him. “I bet you and Jim are
still struggling between finding that perfect balance. It takes time. Vin and I worked on it for a couple years and we still are
fine-tuning it. It’s a big change for
most people. Hell, it was for me. It’s hard allowing someone else to take
control over you and your life. It’s
hard letting someone else tell you what to do and then allow them to punish you
if you don’t.” He stopped and studied
his friend. “You and Jim have been
doing this for how long now?”
“Five months, we
started in March. I have to decide next
month if I want to continue this relationship.” Blair said softly.
“What are you going
to decide?” Day asked gently. “You seem to be happy.”
“Yeah …. “ Blair
said, his voice trailing off, “Just certain things bother me.”
“Like what? The rules you guys have?”
“No, not so much the
particular rules just … ummm… I don’t
know, just the whole he-controlling-my-life thing. This summer was hard in the beginning, I was being stubborn but
then it just sort of clicked and felt so … so right.”
Day smiled, “I know,
Blair, I know what you mean. But, I
think that if it feels right, then if you stop fighting it and just accept your
relationship, things all fall into place.
It’s when you are fighting and struggling that they don’t seem to fit
and it makes it hard.
Just then a small
furry object plopped down on Day’s lap. Blair jumped off the railing, but
Damien St. Claire merely grabbed the creature and hugged it. “Desi, Desdemona, sweet little girl,”
raising the tabby up to show Blair, he continued, “Desi, meet Blair Sandburg,
Blair, my Desi.” Blair saw the look of
love in the hazel eyes as Day stroked the small cat. His friend had a soft spot
for helpless creatures, and no doubt about it, Vincent Cade had an even greater
soft spot for wayward brats.
As they started back
up toward the house, Day playfully bumped Blair in the shoulder, “Trust me on
this one buddy, just go with it and life suddenly fits into place.”
The next several days
went by in easy camaraderie. Every day a new sight was visited. Salisbury
Cathedral left them in awe and Vincent noticed how silent and reflective Jim
had become. Vincent gauged his friend quietly from the sidelines, not making
comments, just private observations on the general mood of the detective.
That evening over
dinner on Sunday, Blair made a small comment about Jim’s lack of appetite. The
detective came back with a harsh answer that was totally uncalled for. Day
broke the tension with a slight joke and soon the meal resumed in basic good
cheer.
Stonehenge was
uneventful, except the two brats were becoming a bit boisterous. A firm command
from Vin to Day and an equally less tolerant comment from Jim to Blair brought
them both back in line in record time.
It wasn’t until they
walked the rolling plains for Sarum, the old site of Salisbury, Monday
afternoon that Vin noticed the first major signs of Jim’s distress. Blair and
Day had run up and down the hills trying to get a proper view of the
surrounding countryside from the different mounds. Vin and Jim, who were
following a little further back, didn’t know what they were doing. But several times they became overly eager
in their discussions. Day pushed Blair in a heated debate, no doubt more in
jest than in actual anger, but Jim had bolted toward them, grabbed the blond
giving him a sharp shake in the process.
“Keep your hands off
of him,” Jim ground out.
“Hey, man, what’s up,
Jim? We were fooling around,” Blair broke the contact by pulling Jim’s hand off
of the shocked young man.
“I don’t want anyone
laying a hand on you,” Jim continued to stare into the confused hazel eyes.
Blair edged his way between the two men and faced Jim.
“What the hell’s the matter
with you? Where is all this coming from, Jim?” Blair looked frightened and if
Jim had been himself, he would have listened to the rising heartbeat of his
friend and Damien, he would also have heard the angry steps coming from behind.
“Enough!” The loud
command brought everyone up and about in time to see Vincent Cade fast
approaching. Jim’s face hardened as
though fighting some unknown enemy even he could not recognize.
Thumbing the two
younger men aside, Vin waited until they got the hint and walked side by side
up another hill overlooking the ruins.
Vin waited until they were out of earshot, but he held Ellison’s glare
with an equally powerful one of his own.
“I’ve suspected as
much,” Vin began. “Blair voiced concerns to Damien along the way about how this
case was eating you up and how you were disrespectful to him, your
relationship, and any efforts to help you. Even Simon Banks had talked to Blair
about the possibility that this time you needed professional help.”
Jim shook his head in
shock and disbelief. “Thanks, that’s good to know that your lover and best
friend are scheming behind your back to have you committed,” and with that, he
started to turn and walk away.
The other man was not
to be put off that easily, reaching out, he easily snagged Jim's arm and pulled
him close. “Liiittttle booooooy.” Vin
had a way of dragging the phrase out that for all it’s soft, mesmerizing
inflections, it held far more threat than any loud command. “Tell me what that was all about.”
Jim shook his head, “It’s
nothing, I can deal with it. Let’s just
drop it.”
“Ha! I don’t think so. We are not going to drop it.
You won’t talk to me about it, you insist on keeping it all closed up
inside, eating away at you, instead of discussing it and letting it out so it
can heal. Well, I know how to make you very open on the subject of
communication. This weekend, you and I take a trip to London, alone.” The
simple itinerary for the coming weekend was relayed like a tour, pleasantly,
quietly, and with all the finality of directing an execution.
Jim started to speak,
but Vin held up his hand, “You were given all the opportunity to talk, now we
do it my way.”
Jim looked back up at
the hill where Day and Blair were pretending to view the scenery. From the
conversation Jim picked up, it was more a conversation about his health and
well-being that had Blair clearly upset.
Looking back at Vin,
Jim nodded his head, knowing full well what was in store for him and the
necessity of such action. Indeed, if asked at that moment, Jim would have
admitted he felt a strange relief to be back in the old, familiar hands of
Vincent Cade.
That night after a
delicious dinner, the warm autumn night was littered with stars. Blair and
Damien both went out of their way to be cordial and in good cheer throughout
the meal, but Jim could tell it was straining and tiring, like walking on ice,
careful of every step.
“Vin, do you mind if
I forego the evening gathering in the living room?” It had become customary
since their arrival to meet every night in the huge living room, for quiet
discussions, catching up on their lives and an occasional parlor game of cards
or board games.
“No, of course not,”
the older man watched his friend as he pulled Blair up by the arm and whispered
in his ear.
Whatever the
suggestion, Blair seemed surprised, then pleased. He flashed a huge grin at
Vincent and ran out of the room.
“Blair’s getting a
jacket, he’s always cold. We’re going to enjoy some of this beautiful night.”
Damien winked at
Vincent and Vincent nodded at Jim, “I understand completely. Don’t stay out too
late. This old place might be drafty, but when that mist settles on the hills,
it gets pretty chilly out and I’m sure you’ll find your room a welcome retreat.
I’ll see the fire’s lit in it before I turn in.”
Jim smiled
gratefully, then turned. Stopping
before he left the dining room, he came back the few steps to put him in front
of Damien.
The blond young man
stood stock-still. He never once looked for Vin and Jim’s respect for the man
increased. Damien St. Claire could hold his own any day in battle.
“I’m sorry, Damien. I
owe you an apology about this afternoon. I wish I knew….” he paused, unsure of
himself, “I wish I could…I wish it never happened. It never should have.”
Extending one hand to
place on Jim’s shoulder, the other sought his hand. A quick shake, a smile that
held only friendship, and Damien didn’t even need to utter one word. Ellison nodded and turned to look at
Vincent. “Either you’ve chosen the best, Vin, or you’re one man who can turn a
sow’s ear into a silk purse.”
Vincent let out a
laugh that resounded in the paneled dining room. Damien huffed and puffed, but
barely suppressed a laugh of his own. Jim Ellison went out into the night to
mend some bridges to his soul.
“Why
don’t you head upstairs, Demon, while I close up the house. We can start a fire and talk for a
while. I miss talking with you.” Vin whispered hugging Day close after Jim
and Blair left.
Day
nodded and with a kiss bolted upstairs.
Stepping
into the bedroom from the bathroom after his shower, Day dropped his wet towels
on the floor. He shivered in the cool
air as he crossed the bedroom to his dresser.
Opening one of the bottom drawers, he pulled out a nightshirt. Slipping the warm flannel over his head and
letting the warmth quickly cover him, he smiled. Several years ago he had his wisdom teeth removed. The ensuing week was racked with pain and a
fever as an infection set in. Desperate
to find something to keep his lover warm but that would also be easy to take on
and off, Vin had seen these nightshirts in a catalog and immediately bought
them. They were perfect and Day still
loved cuddling up in it on cold nights.
Walking
over to his towels, he sighed and muttering to himself, “Pick up the towel,
Damien, we don’t leave wet towels laying around, Damien, that's what towel bars
are for, Damien,” he said in a perfect, if not too flattering, imitation of his
lover. He did not realize he was not
alone until he felt the hem of his nightshirt being brought up and cool air
drifting across his bare bottom seconds before a searing swat landed on both
checks. Jerking up, he spun around to
see his partner.
Smiling
a hopeful grin, he said, “Imitation is the highest form of flattery.”
Taking
the towels in one hand and his lover in the other, Vin said, “Not around here,”
as he walked him toward a corner of the bedroom. “I am looking forward to a nice quiet evening with you, so why
don’t you stand here and stay out of trouble while I take a shower.”
Vin
barely contained a smile at the pout that crossed his brat’s face. Planting a quick kiss on the pouting lips
before turning him to face the corner, Vin landed another hard swat on his
bottom saying, “Stay,” before heading to the bathroom and a quick shower.
Forty-five
minutes later, both men were dozing in an easy chair by the fireplace. Day’s nightshirt was around his waist,
leaving his legs, which were wrapped snuggly around Vin’s hips, bare. Vin was covered in a thin sheen of sweat and
his belly showed the evidence of Day’s excitement, his own cock still deeply
buried in his lover.
Day
groaned and wiggled softly, more from contentment than any desire to move. Lazily he said, “I love it when you stay
inside of me, so big, filling me and claiming me, making sure I never forget
who I belong to.” He tightened his
external muscles to further emphasize his point.
“Little
boy, if you don’t stop moving, we are never going to get up,” Vin groused
lovingly, wrapping his arms around his partner’s waist to hold him still.
“And
that would be a problem, why?” Day
asked slowly starting to move in a slight circular motion, tightening and
relaxing his muscles as he felt Vin stirring to life inside of him.
Vin
laughed huskily before capturing Day’s mouth in a hard kiss.
“That
star there, that’s the brightest one, Chief, and even beyond I can see the
other galaxies, at least the vague glow of them.” Jim lay back on the blanket,
supporting his back on the extra jacket Blair had considerately brought for him.
Blair lay on top of him resting his head against the firm chest, snuggled
securely in the detective’s arms.
“It
must be great having your sight, man, seeing things no one else can see.”
“Sometimes,
Chief, it is, but other times I’d give it all up at a moment’s notice. If you
hadn’t come along, I doubt I’d be here today. I think I would have eventually
just pointed my service revolver against my head and pulled the trigger.”
Blair jammed a sharp
elbow into Ellison’s side and was pleased with the “Ow” it earned.
“I would have been
like so pissed at you, man,” Blair said, only half jokingly.
“I apologized to
Damien, Chief. I was wrong and I have no excuses. I know I haven’t been the
easiest person to get along with lately, but it’s going to be all right. Vin
and I…well, Vin and I will be going to London this weekend,” Jim said.
Rising up on his
elbow, Blair slid off of his lover, turning to lie forward on his chest.
Looking up with big, soulful blue eyes, he said, “Day is going to be really
upset, we had some plans for this weekend, exploring around here.”
“No, Blair, Vin and I
are going to London, alone.”
“Why?” Blair asked,
saying the first thing that popped into his head.
“I’ve got some stuff
built up inside that I can't deal with.
Even as much as I want to talk to you or Vin about it, I can't. I can't get it into words what I'm feeling.
I'm off balance, feeling out of control.
Vin knows how to bring me back in line.”
“Oh,” Blair said,
remembering a conversation with Day on the phone several months ago and his
friend’s inadvertent revelation about Vin’s relationship with Jim.
Looking down at him
suspiciously, Jim heard the increased heart rate. “It's a good thing,
Chief. I know to you right now, it
might not make the most sense, but I think in time you'll understand. Things need to happen and they will, there’s
no sense in questioning them. Which brings me to another point. I accidentally
overheard your conversation with Damien about his relationship with Cade.”
“Oh, man, I forgot
about you. I didn’t mean anything by it, Jim, I only wondered about it and I
wanted to make sure he was okay with it.”
Blair snuggled into Jim, causing the larger man to wrap his arms more
tightly around him.
“It’s all right, I’m
sure we can both be grateful for Damien’s tolerance and self-assurance, at
least so far. He can get defensive, too, you know. Damien needs a firm hand to
keep him in line. I remember when I first came here and realized what type of
relationship they had, they were so happy together and Day was at such peace
with things. I really envied him that,
it was something I had not felt in years. Just don’t make waves, Chief, in
places you don’t know your way around.”
“Well,” Blair said,
not getting upset with the censure, too eager to take it in another direction,
“why don’t you show me some of the sights.” Then with eager lips, he kissed the
firm mouth of the man he loved more than life itself.
The next day,
Tuesday, it rained. Day and Blair went into Salisbury early in the morning. Vin
had supplied him with a grocery list and Damien said there was something he
needed to get in town. The brats off on their mission, Jim and Vin decided to
spend the day cleaning out the large attic. It really wasn’t something that
needed to be done precisely at this time, but Vin decided that Jim needed a
chore to do, to help keep his mind off the coming weekend and to help him relax
again in an old routine.
Vin suggested that a
night out in town at one of the local pubs might just be the thing to add that
extra British flavor to their friend’s vacation.
Jim sat before a huge
box of books, albums, and memorabilia from Vincent’s army days. “Hey, Vin, do
you remember this?” Jim held up a photo of the two men in Washington, D.C. in
front of the Lincoln Memorial. “It was just before I shipped off to Peru. You
had just given up your commission. You
were leaving for England.”
“Yeah, I’m amazed how
it all worked out,” the brown eyes reflected memories. “If I hadn’t of come
here, I never would have met Day. Two Americans who never would have connected
if it weren’t for coming across an ocean.”
“Does he know about
what you did in the army?” Jim asked cautiously.
“NO!” came the sharp
answer. Vin looked at him for a long moment. “He doesn’t need to know that, not
now and not ever. It’s history and that’s where I want it to stay…buried.”
“You know he won’t
hear it from me.”
Vin sighed, “I know,
Jim, I trust you. Sorry, I just love him so much. He’s put a lot of things
behind me, he doesn’t even realize. He thinks I’ve saved him, brought him out
of some kind of darkness into the light. Maybe I have if I’ve saved him from a
life of silent screaming. That’s what
he said he was good at, silent screaming. Protesting things that he raged
against, but not really becoming involved, only show. I keep him in line now,
that’s for sure. I know Blair thinks I’m harsh, but Day needs it and he’ll be
the first to agree.”
“No, Blair’s just new
to all of this. He’s still got some serious thinking to do himself. Our
six-month trial is up next month. It’ll be interesting to see what he decides.”
As Jim talked, he
kept rummaging through the box. Lifting an item, he blushed crimson. Vin caught the cessation of conversation and
turned from his own task. Jim held an
oak paddle in his hands.
“Good thing we
cleaned. I’d forgotten where I’d put that thing. Bring it to London,” Vin said
it so simply, as though it were common everyday things.
“I remember now how
much this thing stings. I’m surprised you don’t use it on Day,” Jim said
rubbing his hand over it, sorry he ever found the damn thing.
“Oh don't worry, Mr.
St. Claire has several of his own. We’ve been meaning to head out and buy a new
one. There’s one with a slight crack in it, need I explain from all the use it
gets,” Vin said, laughingly. “If you
like, you might want to bring Blair and we can make a purchase together. Might
put Blair at ease. God knows, Day’s an old pro at having paddles made for him.”
“I don’t know, Vin, I
don’t think Blair’s ready for that kind of purchase, yet,” Jim hesitated, still
concerned about whether Sandburg would agree to continue the relationship.
"What are you
guys using now?" Vin asked.
"I bought a
wooden hairbrush the first time and we use that for the serious stuff and I
spank him for the less serious offenses."
“Well, let me know if
you change your mind. Damien and I are due a trip. The craftsman’s in Bath and
we could make a day trip of it before you leave back for the States.”
“Unless he does
something really stupid, I don’t think now’s the time,” Jim concluded, hopeful
and ignorant of the future.
Stopping off at the
small post office, the brats had retrieved the metal detector. The awkward box
was placed carefully in Day’s jeep, a seriously old vehicle with probably true
war experience, but Day looked at her as if she were a classic. There were
things to Day’s soul, Blair was beginning to realize, that touched on sentiment
and loyalty and a deep caring for things. He projected no affectations, but in
all the small gestures of his heart, he showed class. Blair was proud to have
met him.
“Okay, here’s the
plan. I found out from Vin that he and Jim are going back to London for the
weekend. I think your Mr. Ellison is in for some time across Vin’s knee.
Remember that I told you that Jim was here about three years ago---I guess
right before he met you. I swear that one week, it was either me or Jim lying
across Vin's lap getting our butts beaten.” Day laughed as he forced the large
package snuggly up against the back of the front seats.
Locking the door, he
pulled a list from his back pocket. “Okay, some serious grocery shopping.”
Blair’s eager eyes
took in the small town shops. Most were tourist attraction type shops with
souvenirs of Stonehenge and the Salisbury Cathedral. The Bull’s Head Tavern was
on the corner of Twingate and Towes Road.
“That’s where we’ll be having dinner this evening. Great steaks and the
best place for a pint in all of England, if you ask me.”
“I’ve always wanted
to go to a genuine English pub,” Blair commented, following his energetic
friend along.
“Well, if you’re up
for a dart game, I can take you hands down,” Day stated, seriously. “I’m the
best in town. I even beat Vin and he used to be some kind of school champion
back in his college days.”
“I think I know my way
around a dart board,” Blair said, giving Damien a conspiratorial smile. “How
about we make it serious. You up for a little bet.”
“Sure, if you don’t
mind losing, I don’t mind getting richer.”
A “humph” was the
only reply as both shoppers entered the market.
Dinner was a relaxed
affair. The pub was alive mid-week with tourists as well as locals. The guys
had managed to secure a table in the far corner. It was far enough away from the fireplace where all the tourists
seemed bent on milling around.
As soon as the plates
were taken away, another round of pints was ordered. The two younger men jumped up eagerly and took off for the back
room where a dart board and other games were set up to distract the locals.
“Vin, you’ve really
got it made here,” Jim said, easing back in his chair now that they were alone.
“I guess I always wondered why you decided to settle in England, but this place
makes me wonder why I don’t chuck it all and move over here myself.”
“Too many memories
back home, too many men’s families I’d just as soon not run into. It suits me
here. Halcyon was the final pull. Once
I saw that place, I just knew I was home.”
“You haven’t even
visited in over ten years. Don’t you think Day might be right? You could come
over for a few weeks or a few months,” Jim said with a smile, "maybe try
some American landscapes. I’d like to introduce you to Simon Banks. You two have a very similar threshold for
tolerance,” Jim laughed, raising his mug in a mock salute to men of little
patience.
The throaty laugh of
Vincent Cade was warm and musty from the beer. It was the laugh of a man still
not sure it was acceptable in him.
“Day says I need to
loosen up more. He says I walk around with a stick stuck up my butt most times.
That boy has a way of putting images in your head about yourself and they’re
not always good ones.” Vincent almost drained his mug after that admission.
"You picked a
good one there, my friend. He is an
amazing person."
Vin smiled, "He
is. He is a contradiction; he has a
good head on his shoulders and is smart, but too many people would or have
overlooked it because he needs a firm hand and a tight leash to keep him in
line. I can't imagine life without
him." Vin smiled and glanced over
his shoulder to make sure that their partners were not coming back. "You've got a really special young man
yourself. He's smart as a whip but not
stuck up or conceited. Seems to be a
very genuinely warm and loving person.”
“That he is,” Jim
said with a smile. “He blows me away
sometimes with how much he knows, but he would never dream of making anyone
feel less because of it."
“Have the two of you
settled down into a good routine yet?
He seems to be bucking your discipline some,” Vin observed.
"Yeah, some I
think. He's a tough one. I don't want to break his spirit, and I'm
afraid that if I'm too harsh or push him that's exactly what will happen. Blair's too special to risk doing that
to. We are still working on it. Hell," Jim said, taking a big swig of
his beer, "I don't know if he will even agree to do this full time."
"I think he
wants to, Jim, I think he needs to, just don't know if he's aware of
it."
Just then the two
young men returned to the table, cutting off whatever Vin was going to say
next.
Day’s face was
flushed and Blair seemed upset. “Come on, Vin, let’s go. I’m tired,” Damien
said, placing a hand on Vincent’s arm, as he sat down.
“Don’t be rude,
little boy, it’s not about what you want tonight,” Cade glared at his brat who
had slumped rudely down. One look and
Day straightened, grudgingly.
“I’m kind of tired
myself,” Blair said, joining in with his request for an early evening.
Jim and Vincent
exchanged quizzical glances. Jim shook
his head to confirm he wasn’t listening to what was going on in the other room
and he was as much at a loss as Vin to the change about in their moods.
Neither man pushed,
deciding that it was a squabble the young men could handle on their own.
The next day, the
brats had seemed to start fresh. Whatever fight had caused the early cessation
to the evening’s entertainment was put aside. Damien and Blair made breakfast
in the kitchen, each taking a tray upstairs for their lover.
Blair knelt on the
bed looking down at Jim. Watching the
tired detective relaxed and youthfully innocent in his sleep, made Blair’s
heart ache with the certainty of his love.
Planting a firm kiss
on Jim’s mouth, he brought the man into the daylight. “Chief, that is not the
way to get me out of bed,” Jim moaned greedily, pulling the young
anthropologist on top of him, pinning him to his chest. The rising desire was
proof of his effect on this man.
“No, Jim, breakfast.
Then if you’re a good boy, I’ll see about joining you in bed again.” Blair
pulled away and placed the breakfast tray across Ellison’s lap as he scooted up
and leaned against the headboard.
“Vin will expect me
down for breakfast,” Jim said regretfully.
“Nope. Day’s waking
him much the same way right now.” Blair grinned lasciviously, “probably keep
him in bed for at least another hour.”
Cocking his head
exaggeratedly towards the outer hallway, Jim smiled and nodded. Sandburg took
his pillow off the bed and swatted Jim playfully on the head. “I thought you
were only supposed to use your talents for good. Isn’t that like so unethical
in the superhero manual.”
“When you start
teaching a course, Sandburg, I’ll read the manual. Right now I’m pretty much
making up the rules as I go along.”
Blair sat
cross-legged on the bed watching as Jim ate his breakfast. His appetite, though
not completely back, had improved some. Once Vincent laid down the law, Jim
seemed a bit more careful about following them.
“Come on, Jim, just
one more slice of bacon and finish the toast,” Blair still wanted a clean
plate.
“Chief, knock off the
mother-hen routine. I’ve got enough with Cade breathing down my neck,” Jim said
irritably.
“I’m just trying to
put some weight back on you. You lost quite a bit the last few weeks. The
country air has given me an appetite. I just want to see you eat with your
usual gusto.”
Jim put the tray on
the floor and pulled Blair back down on top of him, nuzzling his ear. “I can
show you gusto, Chief, if it’s gusto you want.”
Pushing off of Jim,
Blair sat back crossing his arms over his chest, playfully teasing. “You eat
the rest of your bacon and toast, you’ll get me.”
Ellison reddened,
pushing the covers back he stood beside the bed, his hands on his hips, dressed
only in his boxers. “So now sexual blackmail. Any other devious little tricks
you have in mind, Sandburg.”
Blair’s mouth dropped
open. Jim was not joking. He was raging. “GET OUT! Let me take my shower in
peace,” he yelled. Totally uncalled for, but quite sincere. Blair jumped off
the bed, grabbed the breakfast tray on the floor and opened the door.
Vincent Cade stood in
the hall just outside the door carrying his tray back to the kitchen. No doubt
in Blair’s mind that he had heard the outburst. Closing the door, feeling protective of Jim, he shrugged his
shoulders. “Morning doesn’t seem to become Jim right now. Must be the bacon,
all those sulfates,” he said adding humor to the situation.
Vin raised an eyebrow
but simply followed Blair to the kitchen.
After they unloaded
their trays, Blair started to beat a hastily embarrassed retreat to the back
gardens.
“Blair,” Vin called
out, halting the younger man, “hold on and I’ll join you.”
He turned and looked
at his host. “Isn’t Day going to be
expecting you back in bed?”
Vin gave him what on
anyone else would be a smug smile, “No, he’s asleep and won’t be up for an hour
or so. We have time to talk.”
“Oh, okay,” Blair
said, less than thrilled about the prospect.
Vin smiled again,
ignoring the wary attitude, “Come on out to the terrace so we can talk,” he
said, handing Blair a glass of juice.
After they were
seated, Vin wasted no time in small talk.
“How long has he been this on- edge, Blair?”
Blair took a long sip
of his juice, avoiding the question----wanting to protect his lover yet wanting
him to also get help. “Umm – we had
this bad case that started in August and finished two weeks before we got
here. Jim was running pretty ragged
after the second body was found.” He
stopped, remembering the haunted look in his lover’s eyes.
“How long did this go
on? How many people were killed?”
Blair swallowed and
glanced down into his juice. “Over a
month and he killed 15 people.” He
paused again and Vin did not interrupt.
“It really bothered him, he wasn’t sleeping or eating and wouldn’t let
me or Simon or anyone else help him,” the pain that he was not able to help his
lover evident in his voice. “He
wouldn’t let me help him, Vin. I tried,
I really did.”
“I’m sure you did,
son. It’s not your fault. Jim’s always
been like that, or at least as long as I’ve known him. Sometimes you simply don’t give him the
choice, you yank the control from him.”
Blair stared off into
the distance, looking at the river and the rolling grounds before mumbling and
shaking his head, “I’m not that strong.
Maybe before, but not now.”
Vin looked at the
younger man, puzzled by the comment but he did not say anything.
It was over lunch on
the terrace that Cade voiced his plans. “Jim and I will be leaving for London
in the morning.”
“I thought we were
going Saturday, tomorrow’s Thursday,” Jim said, a bit confused and very much
unsettled.
“I just feel we need
this trip a little sooner than expected,” he helped himself to a sandwich and a
large helping of potato salad from the local deli.
Watching Jim’s face
crease in concern, he saw him push away his plate, no longer interested in
food. Cade reached over quite
nonchalantly pulled the plate toward him.
Putting two sandwich halves on it and a scoop of salad before pushing it
back to the other man. A quick look at Jim’s stubborn grimace, a raised eyebrow
of warning, and Ellison soon began eating.
Blair watched the
exchange, feeling a bit uncomfortable. The image of this man punishing Jim
didn’t set well with him. No more than he could come to grips completely with
the relationship he had with Damien. Not realizing he was staring, his mouth
drooping in quiet wonder, he felt a sharp kick to his shins.
Day’s head, lowered
to his plate, attention given to his sandwich, looked up with hazel eyes and a
quick shake to his head. In Day’s mind, things were looking up. More time for
exploration, digging around and a better chance of finding the missing ring.
Blair nodded quickly, understanding the need to be discreet, but still not
quite happy with the proceedings.
It wasn’t until
evening misted over the landscape, that the chill of the night brought out the
heat of debate. It started out
peacefully enough. Jim sat on one huge winged back chair, Sandburg sitting in
his lap, resting his head on his shoulder.
Damien was lying on
the sofa with his head in Vin’s lap, as the older man stroked his hair. “How
long do you think you’ll be in London?” Day fished for exact timing.
“Oh, I think Jim and
I should conclude our business by Saturday, Sunday at the latest. It all
depends,” Vin cast a look at Jim.
The blue eyes
darkened with pain, “Yeah, a few days,” Ellison said, realizing how much he
needed Vincent and the time they would spend together. He knew once the
stronger, wiser man had him properly positioned, he would extract more
information, instill more painful realizations, and start the healing faster
than any session with a shrink could ever do. Vincent’s technique worked
wonders on the memory and the soul---at least for him.
Blair raised his head
and looked into his lover’s eyes. “Jim, maybe you shouldn’t go. I mean, you
don’t have to. This is supposed to be a vacation. We could walk every day over
the hills, maybe even take a picnic basket and eat down by the river.”
“Shhhh,” Jim said
softly, placing a finger over Blair’s lips and stilling the avoidance he
recognized. “It’s all right, Blair. It’s okay. I’m fine with it and I want to
go.”
Blair threw a
scathing look at Vin, hostile in the knowledge of what was to transpire. Day
caught the look and bristled, “Vin knows what he’s doing,” he murmured but was
quickly hushed by Vin.
“Does he?” Blair
asked. “Ow!” a sharp swat to his rear made him look hurtfully at Jim.
“Don’t be
disrespectful.”
“Well, does he, Jim?
Does he really?”
“I think it’s up to
Jim to decide that, little boy, not you,” Cade said quietly.
“I’m not a little
boy. I’m a man. Jim treats me like a man,” Blair said haughtily. Then seeing
Day’s expression, he amended, “well, most times.”
“You’re always a man,
Blair, you just get treated like a child when you act like one. Don’t you think
you’re acting like one now?” Jim narrowed his eyes, pinning Blair with an icy
blue stare.
“I’m sorry,” he laid
his head on Jim’s shoulder, not wanting to fight this last night together. “I just love you, man. I love you so much.”
“I know. I do know
that, Blair.”
“Hey, how’s about a
game of Trivial Pursuit,” Day raised himself up, eager to bring some fun back
into their lives.
“Sounds good to me,”
Jim said, tickling Blair, “and I know Blair loves to play.” Within moments the
laughing younger man was nodding his head furiously trying to escape the
torture and also the painful thoughts.
Vin smiled at Jim,
watching the play between the two men. Ellison pushed Blair up and landed a
firm swat on his rear. He grinned at Vincent nodding his head in a mutual
concurrence that all was really well or soon would be.
The game started out
by the rules, nice and even and moving right along. An hour later, the mood had
shifted. Jim and Vincent were winning. Both of their pieces were filled and
about to start the way up the centerline and they were gently teasing the two
younger men. Blair was missing two
triangles and Day was missing three.
“Come on, Professor,”
Vin said with a laugh as he replaced the card that they had just missed. “It doesn’t get much easier than this. What name did Vincent Van Gogh sign to his
paintings?”
Jim laughed as Blair
blushed. “You couldn’t come up with
‘Vin?’”
Blair laughed and
shook his head, “Don’t worry, Day and I are just planning a big come from
behind rally. Aren’t we?” he asked his friend, nudging him.
Day didn’t answer and
only gave a small, faint smile.
Blair gave his
partner a strange look, unsure about this competitive side of his new friend.
He had seen it last night at the dartboard.
Damien had been confident and happy when they started, but once Blair
started winning he had become withdrawn and upset. Several times Blair had
heard him chastising himself. Blair had let it go by morning, thinking it was
just a strain of having guests in your home and wanting to impress a new
friend, but now he realized Day placed a lot of his self-worth on winning.
“Day!” Vin said
sharply as he noticed the other man’s withdrawn attitude. “What have I told you about winning all the
time?” Vincent pinned the young blond man with his brown eyes.
“You guys are getting
all the easy ones. It’s not fair, I’m
getting all the hard ones and you’re making fun of me. I’m just getting upset, that’s all,” he
tried to explain.
“Well, don’t.” The
simple statement made him bristle all the more. “No one is making fun of you,
it’s a game and we’ve talked about the importance of lack of importance in
winning. Haven’t we?”
Day nodded.
Several minutes
later, he picked up the dice and rolled, landing the piece on History.
Vin pulled the card
and read the question, “Who was Paul Revere’s wife?”
“Bullshit!” Damien
yelled out, rising from his chair. “No way are you going to tell me you aren’t
giving me all the hard ones!”
“Damien ….” It came
out slowly, silkily, and threateningly.
“NO! It’s NOT
fair! I am not as stupid as you are
making me seem!”
“Day, no one thinks
you’re stupid, it’s just a dumb game,” Blair burst out disbelievingly.
Day’s response was a
sweeping hand over the game board, pieces flying in different directions, the
cards joining them on the hard wood floor.
The next several
seconds were basically a blur to Blair. Day was standing there one moment
looking outraged, his hands on his hips in self-righteous anger. The next
moment Vincent had Day’s butt facing Blair as the blond young man was draped
over the large shoulder.
“If you’ll excuse me,
gentlemen, I need a word with Damien. Don’t clean up the room, he’ll be more
than happy to do so in a short while. Also he’ll be coming to your room later
this evening to apologize.” With that statement, Vin turned around and strode
purposefully up the small step and out into the hallway heading for the
staircase. Blair watched as Damien still raged, trying to grab hold of Vin’s
belt and right himself.
As large as the house
was, Blair could hear the loud, resounding swats of a wooden paddle on bare
flesh, several minutes later, the reverberating cries that echoed each smack
and the argument that was still ensuing. By time they reached their bedroom,
the arguments were more pathetic with more pleadings intermingled. Jim shook
his head as they closed the door. He walked over to the fireplace and turned on
the gas logs.
“Don’t feel badly,
Blair, he brought this upon himself.”
“I just don’t know
what got into him. He was like this
last night with the darts. I mean, just because I was winning, he got all upset
with himself and really down.” Blair stood in the middle of the room, looking
towards the door, still hearing the vague cries of distress.
Jim walked over to
him, put his arm around his waist from behind and drew Blair back to the large
lounge chair by the fire. Sitting down he pulled his lover onto his lap. “Vin
loves him. Damien feels he has to win, has to be the best to be worthy of
Vincent sometimes. It’s something they’re working on, but Day just needs to be
reminded every so often.”
Blair lay his head
back, “I don’t like you going tomorrow, Jim. I don’t like the idea of him
hurting you. It sounds like Day is
hurting.”
“Chief, he’s not
going to be hurting, he’s going to be helping me, like he’s doing with
Day. Yeah, there is going to be some
discomfort – maybe even pain – involved but it’s okay. I never believed in
discipline myself until after Peru. When I came here to spend some time with
Vincent and Damien, I had no idea what type of relationship they were in. I was
confused and lost, I was hurting and turning those feelings back on
myself. I was unsettled, angry at the
world and felt guilty as anything over loosing my men. I was so jealous of their relationship and
wanted it so badly, wanted that peace that Day seemed to have but I had no idea
how to get it. It wasn’t until I walked in one day to see Damien over Vin’s
knee being punished that I realized what was going on.” He kissed Blair on top of the head,
reassuring himself as well as his partner that everything was fine.
“When Vincent saw me,
he motioned me out, not wanting to embarrass Day. However, we talked about it
and he wanted to try it with me. Said I had to agree, but he thought it would
help me come out of myself, break down emotionally and talk to him about what
was really bothering me. Well, Chief, I talked and I cried and I talked some
more and it worked like I don’t think anything else would have. I’m not saying
it was always pleasant and didn’t hurt.
It was probably one of the most painful---both physical and
emotional---things I’ve ever done. He
was disciplining me, harshly and firmly, but I knew I was also loved and cared
for. It was a good feeling. After being responsible for eight men’s lives, it
was good to give up that responsibility to Vincent Cade. I’m perfectly willing
to do that again, Chief…perfectly willing.”
They sat there for
over an hour, watching the flames dance in the fire, the cozy warmth expelling
all their fears. A soft knock on the
door and when beckoned in, Damien opened the door. Vincent could be seen standing out in the hallway, arms folded
across his chest, watching the proceedings.
”Jim, Blair, I’m sorry for the way I behaved this evening. I hope you can
forgive me,” the red eyes could barely meet their gaze.
“Of course,” Jim
said. He nudged Blair. “Yeah, sure, Day. No problem, man. We all get carried
away sometimes playing games.”
Damien sniffled
pathetically, wiped at his eyes, then unconsciously brought a hand back to rub
his butt. “Thanks,” he muttered and turned, not leaving the room until Vincent
nodded his head.
“Manners, little
boy,” Vincent still demanded more.
Damien turned, “Good
night, Jim. Good night, Blair.” Then he left, no doubt to proceed downstairs
and clean up the board game.
“Let’s get to
bed. I want to hold you close. I’ll
miss you until Sunday.”
Then with eager
fingers, they undressed each other and climbed beneath the covers. The weekend
would be long and eventful for both men.
Jim and Vin left
early. After a quick breakfast of
scrambled eggs and toast in the breakfast room, the four men proceeded out to
the front drive and amid warnings, threats and hugs they parted company.
Damien was in an
unusual mood. Sullen and quiet, he practically hung on Vincent when it came
time to leave. No doubt in Blair’s mind that the brat had been in a sulk since
the board game last night, too caught up with his own internal struggles to pay
much attention to anything else. Now when the object of his love was leaving
for three days, he was remorsefully seeking to make up for it in a matter of
minutes.
Vincent pulled him
off to the side as Jim and Blair had private words between themselves. Blair
caught a slight smack to the blonde’s bottom for some uncalled for comment, but
in the final moments Vin trapped the face of his lover and planted a resounding
kiss to his lips.
“Behave, Demon,” he
growled out in warning, as he moved towards the driver’s side. Jim took his
cue, kissed Blair one last time and slid into the passenger seat.
Rolling the window
down, Jim added, “You, too,” as a final reminder to Blair.
As the black sedan
moved out towards the long driveway, the young men waved, solemnly.
“Well, we have at
least two full days to go over every inch of the yard. You game?” Day asked his
friend.
“As long as we stay
out of trouble. Let’s start with the gardens and pray we find it. The lawn’s going to take the longest. ”
Blair said, already taking charge.
“Righto, my friend,”
Day seemed in a cheery mood now that he had a purpose to life.
“You know they’re up
to something, don’t you?” Vincent asked casually as he peered into the rearview
mirror.
“Yeah, I heard them
planning every chance they got. I think Day wants to go treasure hunting.”
“Damn it, I’ve talked
myself blue in the face, but I should have known Day only hears what he wants
to hear,” Vin took the turn a bit too sharply as he accelerated, throwing Jim
against the shoulder harness.
Catching the look
thrown his way, he eased up on the accelerator, “Sorry, Jimbo, the Demon gets
into me sometime.”
“They’ll be all
right. Blair has a solid head on his shoulders and he’s used to dealing with
enthusiastic students on anthropological digs.
They’ll be fine.” Jim leaned back, closed his eyes, and hoped for the
best.
Vincent tightened his
grip on the wheel. Enthusiasm is a mild
word compared to what Damien’s capable of, Vin thought. Blair better watch it isn’t contagious.
The sedan hugged the road and traveled on towards London.
Day motioned Blair
over several inches, the headphones locked into place on the golden head, the
metal detector beeping away. “There, dig right there,” he pointed towards a row
of flowers carefully planted in a circular pattern of color.”
“You know, this would
have been a hell of a lot easier if you hadn’t been digging, planting and
spreading fertilizer all day.” Then
pausing, looking at where Day was pointing,
“What about the flowers?” Blair asked, hating to upset the carefully
laid garden.
“Blair, this ring is
a lot more valuable and important then the flowers. Besides, winter is coming on and their days are numbered anyway.”
Digging into the
earth Blair tossed each shovel full onto the mesh they had layered over an old
bucket. The earth sifted through fallen to the bottom while rocks and any items
would remain on top for closer inspection.
When several feet of the earth was upended and sifted through, the metal
detector still unequivocally demanded their attention. Finally, the flowers
teetered over, no longer strong enough to withstand the assault. Blair realized
there was no way of saving them now.
Day turned off the
machine and carefully poked around the items on top of the mesh. A rusty nail,
the shirt clasp of a fountain pen, and a piece of metal no longer recognizable.
“Nothing. Okay, let’s
continue.” Day hefted the equipment up and was once again scanning the terraced
gardens.
By lunchtime, half
the gardens were uprooted. It looked like a disaster zone after a war.
Soup and sandwiches
and the brats were onto the next section.
This time Blair manned the metal detector and Damien dug. Day was far
less careful of his attack. The slightest suggestion from the detector and
Damien was digging deep and thoroughly, covering the areas around. “Hey, man,
go easy here. Vincent is not going to like coming home to his garden looking
like this. You have a death wish?” Blair wondered, fearful of having the older
man’s anger directed at him.
“I’ll just tell him
Sam Cutler’s dog got loose. Last summer, Bozo came digging around chasing some
rabbits. He dug up most of Vin’s freshly planted flowers. I thought Vin was
going to kill that dog, but you want to know something funny?” Day asked, as he
squatted near the bucket ciphering for his ring.
“What? He drowned him
in the river?” Blair asked, seriously.
“Nah, Vin’s a soft
touch. Same thing with Desi. He acts like he hates her, like she bothers his
allergies. I saw him once through his office window. She was sitting on his
desk and he was feeding her cat treats he has locked away. Talking to her like
they were soul mates. Never let on that I know. I’ve learned to play the game
with Vin, he likes seeing himself as a hard ass and he likes others to see him
that way, too. Actually, he’s a soft touch,” Day explained.
They stopped, having
found a small round object that turned out to be a brass fitting. Day grimaced, “Well, like I was saying,” he
continued his story as he started digging deeper, “Vin put a rope around the
dog’s neck, tied it to the back porch and then brought out a series of dishes.
The damn dog had a buffet table set up for him. Vin called Mr. Cutler bitching
up a storm. Just as the guy comes rushing over here, Vin cleans up the dishes
and plays Mr. Put Upon Neighbor. I almost laughed out loud when Vin said he’d
have the dog and Mr. Cutler locked up if it happened again.” Damien chuckled. “Vincent
is never what he appears to be. He’s hard, Blair, but underneath he’s only hard
to hide the softness.”
“Besides, animals can
tell about people. Bozo and Desi love Vincent and so do I. We dumb animals, we
know stuff like that,” Day laughed, and then barking loudly, he stood
stock-still. The shovel had hit something metal, something large, something
stubborn and now hissing.
The London flat was
empty. Patrick had been instructed via a phone call to make himself scarce for
the next few days. The weather forecast was for drastically dropping
temperatures. A frost would be overlaying the countryside and the chance of
rain was ninety-percent.
“That should keep the
brats indoors and out of trouble,” Vincent said as he turned the remote off. He
and Jim had casually eaten lunch in font of the television, making themselves
at home again in the flat.
“Yeah, Blair hates
the cold. Day will be hard pressed to get him scavenging the countryside if the
temperature drops below fifty. He didn’t really bring anything heavier than a
cable knit sweater. I think we’ve got the weather babysitting for us.” He lay
his head back on the winged back chair and closed his eyes. No doubt to Vincent
the soul searching was coming to the forefront.
Getting up, he
collected the plates and glasses. When he returned he sat on the sofa.
Sighing heavily, he
looked at Jim Ellison, tired, eyes closed, head back, a man lost to some
painful fears he could not shake.
“Go get it, James.”
Jim’s eyes shot open.
He stared at Vin as though he didn’t quite hear right.
“You heard me. Go get
it.”
Rising wearily, Jim
did as he was told. Up the stairs to his room, he opened the suitcase and took
out the wooden object Vin had instructed him to pack, him to bring, and him to
be responsible for…the old paddle.
Returning to the
living room, he handed the instrument to Vin. The older man shook his head and
pointed to the coffee table in front of him. The detective put it down within
easy reach of the ex-Lt. Colonel.
“Take ‘em down, Jim,
and assume the position.” Vin spoke in short commands, easily catching Ellison
in the voice of authority and the obedience military men just fall into out of
habit.
Slowly unbuckling his
belt, he unzipped his pants and pulled them off. Taking several deep breaths, he knelt down next to Vin’s knees,
and carefully laid himself across the strong, muscled thighs.
“We’re here to talk.
To find out what’s got you all tied up and upset, we are going to get it out in
the open, deal with it and start you back on track,” Vin said gently as he
rubbed Jim’s back. “You talk, I
listen,” he continued, his voice now taking on a sterner edge. “You don’t talk
or insist on BS’ing me, then I paddle, spank, then stop. You get a chance to
talk again. If you don’t talk or aren't honest, we start the procedure again,
round and round, until you catch on.
Got it?”
“I’m just tired, Vin,
that’s all. The case. It was hard,” Jim said softly, resting his head on his
folded arms resting on the couch. He
knew, even as he spoke, that Vincent Cade could not be fooled and would not
allow him the easy route.
“You’re a cop, Jim,
you’ve been a cop for over eight years now. Don’t tell me you’ve not built up
some protection against seeing some of the cruelty you’ve seen this past
month.”
“No, you never get
used to some things,” Jim said, buying time.
“No, not used to it,
but why did you let it absorb you like you did?”
“I don’t know.”
“Not a good enough
answer. Not good answers by a long shot, my friend.” Vin shifted Jim into a
better position for his attentions. Pulling the boxers down, he picked up the
paddle.
“I think you have
better insight into the problem than you are letting on. You’ve ignored Blair’s
entreaties to eat, his general concerns for your health and well-being. Do you
think that’s right? He’s your lover. He cares about you as you care about him.”
There was only
silence. The stubborn pride of a man brought to this point. A man who could
understand loving someone, but could not acknowledge the same needs for caring
and nurturing that he could so easily give himself.
Vincent Cade raised
the paddle high. Bringing it down without warning, he imprinted a red region to
the right check.
“This isn’t fair,
Vin!” Jim cried out.
In answer to the
fairness of it all, an equally severe swat landed on the left check. Jim
groaned, biting down on the pain, refusing to cry out.
The paddle intoned
itself with a steady rhythm, sound and fury, anger over careless regard for
self and Blair, the equalizer demanded justice. Vincent paddled hard, reddening
the surface in an equally fine measure, toning the skin to rosy hues.
By the twenty-fifth
stroke, Ellison was crying softly.
Cade laid the paddle
on the table and softly stroked the red globes. “Why? Answer me, little boy.
Why did this one bother you so much?”
Jim wiggled seeking
some relief to the region. Vin delivered a sharp spank to settle him down.
“Talk to me or do I continue paddling you?”
“I saw him there,” he broke down. “I saw him
there every time we found another one. I realized how easy it could have been
him. How these boys, these young men..” Jim stopped to catch his breath. Vin
pulled a handkerchief from his breast pocket and handed it to Jim. Blowing his
nose, he paused to regain some composure. Then he continued, “They were a Blair
to someone. There was someone out there who loved them the way I love him. So,
in truth, I failed him. And it hurts.”
“Shhh, little boy,
shhhh,” Vin continued the soft strokes reaching higher now to rise above Jim’s
waist. Comforting, offering solace and understanding, he still held him firmly
down, but he was pinning him with safety as well as the threat of punishment.
“But you still didn’t
answer me. Why did you ignore Blair? Were you taking it out on him? Making him
pay for being a victim, because you couldn’t make those other young men pay
anymore?” Vin went for the throat, toppling the man across his lap into a realm
he was not ready to go.
“NO!” Jim shouted
out. “Damn you, Vin! NO!”
Cade took a deep
breath. This time using his large hand, he started smacking the reddened
bottom, covering the distance with a vengeance, eager to force the issues at
hand. Jim wiggled in a vane attempt to escape the pain. Vincent pressed down
firmly on the small of his back refreshing his memory to the feelings of helplessness,
comeuppance, time to pay the piper. Jim sobbed, gulping large masses of air,
choking off cries of pain and frustration and guilt.
“I hated him!” Jim
let it out, hating himself as he said the words. “I hated him, Vin, hated him
as I hated them for getting themselves killed. I hated him for making me love
him the way I do, for putting me in the position of caring so much that if he
was one of them I would not be able to live.”
Vin stopped his hand
in mid-flight. It was said. The truth was clearing the air and now they could
search deeper. The doors were wide open now and Jim Ellison was a man again,
not a silent super hero bent on quiet suffering and self-recrimination.
Lifting the figure,
he helped the detective rise up, turning him quickly to fall back upon his lap.
Ellison winced as his hot flesh made contact with the rough cords Cade wore.
“It’s okay, now, Jimmy, it’s okay. We
can deal with it. We’ve got a few days and we can find out how to make it right,”
he said as Jim cried on his shoulder, releasing the pain and guilt that had
festered inside.
The late afternoon
sun filtered through the shades, igniting the room with a tribute to the day,
bright shards of light seeking every corner, finding entrance through the
smallest crack---just as a soul will seek the most unobtrusive entrance and
move towards a friend to find some light.
British Gas pulled
out of the driveway by six o’clock that evening. The gas line was severally
damaged and the best that could be done was a shut off of service until the
lines could be repaired on Sunday. The
old house would get pretty damn cold this evening, but Day wasn’t worried about
the chill in the air. His concerns were for the rising temperatures upon
Vincent Cade’s return.
Now as both brats
reflected over their quiet meal, heads bowed into their soup bowls, imagining
the worst possible scenarios upon their lover’s return in a few days, all
enthusiasm was long gone.
The scream pierced
the night, echoing off the walls. Vincent Cade was down the hall in a matter of
seconds, heading directly for the cause of the disturbance. Throwing the light
switch he was on the bed in no time grabbing the flailing arms, calling out
assurances, “Jim, it’s all right, Jim. Wake up.”
Blue eyes focused,
turned outward until they met the rock solid, earth tone eyes of Cade. One could ground yourself in those eyes, for
they were firm and solid, hard and unyielding, yet deep when they wanted to be.
Now they looked into the ocean depths with the quiet calm of logic and
compassion.
Pulling away from the
hands, Ellison wiped a weary hand over his face, drawing downward the pain and
confusion until it fell away. “I’m
sorry. I must have been dreaming.”
“No?” Cade asked,
surprise evident in his eyes, humor softening the expression.
A smile flashed the
somber face, “Didn’t have nightmares about the case before.”
“Could be you weren’t
sleeping very much, enough to have any dreams or nightmares,” Cade argued.
“So it’s a good thing
now?” Jim queried, looking for a fight.
“Yes, it’s a good
thing you’re acknowledging how hard the past few weeks have been on you. No,
it’s not a good thing you’re having nightmares, but that only means you need
more time, more discussion. No, it’s not a good thing to show me attitude at
two o’clock in the morning. And yes, it’s a good thing you’re going to spend
the rest of the night with me.” With that he drew back the covers and waited
patiently for the detective to get up.
Jim opened his mouth
to protest, then a quick hand raised and he doubted a whole platoon would have
been willing to take on Vincent Cade, hair disheveled, look of mild annoyance
and much taller in the shadows of the lamp. He looked powerfully built with the
white T-shirt straining against his muscles. The lightly graying temples only highlighted
his features in the soft lighting.
Besides, Ellison
thought as he stood up, can’t think of a
better place to be when I need to feel safe, than next to Vincent Cade.
“Damn it, Blair,”
Damien said for what seemed to him the hundredth time that night, as he pulled
the blankets up around him, turning on his side on the couch to face the fire.
The house was cold. The gas heating was useless with no fuel and most of the
rooms had fireplaces fueled with gas as well. The large living room was the only
natural log fireplace. “It wasn’t my
fault. You were there. Why didn’t you think of power and gas lines? You were
just as eager as I was to unearth that thing. Huh!” He harrumphed as though
adding more credence to his statement.
Blair slept on the
floor closer to the glowing fire. Cold was not a favored state to him. The
brats had collected just about every available blanket from the house and
brought them into this room. The coffee table was moved away from the hearth,
the couch pushed closer in towards the warmth, and all the blankets piled
around looked as though some giant animal had begun nesting in the great room.
Letting go a long
shiver, Blair, wrapped his feet closer in. “This is so not my idea of a
vacation. Why don’t you just call Vincent and tell him. Maybe we can all go
back down to the flat in London until the heat is fixed.”
“NO!” Day yelled,
getting tired of Blair’s logic. “Not until I find the ring. I just know it’s
out there. I just know it! And this is going to be one of my only chances to
find it!” He would not be swayed.
Blair watched the
fire leap and lick upward, wishing he could sit himself on those logs and be
consumed in the blaze, as cold and dejected as he felt. He was beginning to
really care for Damien St. Claire. He was so like the brother he never had or
childhood friend who never stayed too long in Blair’s peripatetic life. But,
and it was a big but to Blair right now, he could do without the stubborn,
pigheaded, one-track mind that was pulling both young men fast into more
trouble than either one could handle.
“Blair?” the quite
voice lacked the cocky-sureness that had plagued him all evening.
“What?” the
anthropologist asked not turning around.
“I’m sorry. Don’t be
angry with me. Vin always lectures me about responsibility and the right thing
to do and all that crap that puts people in boxes and ruts. I just don’t want
that with you. You know, man, I just want it to be different with you.” There
was so much longing in the small speech that Blair rolled over and faced the
young man lying on the couch a few feet above him.
“Day, we’re in for a
penny, we might as well be in for the pound.” Seeing the grin that spread
across the blonde’s face, he added, smiling himself, “Where do we start
tomorrow?”
That was enough to set
the dreamers off on plots and plans and locality…enough to wile away a good
chunk of the cold, bitter night.
“Oh, man, why didn’t
I see it before?” Day said, his voice
filled with happiness. He was laying on
his stomach, looking down through the floor of the gazebo, the fading sunlight
just revealing the glint of gold half buried in the dirt. “You’re amazing
Blair, fucking amazing.”
“Just saw the glint
as I was tying my shoe. Must have been
the right angle of the sun or something,” Blair said happily. At least they had
accomplished their goal. They would
have that to think about right before their lover’s killed them.
All morning the two
young men had dug small holes in the newly sodded lawn sloping down from the
terraced gardens towards the river. The lawn looked like it had been attacked
by a legion of ground hogs and moles, but neither Damien nor Blair seemed too
concerned about the state of the lawns.
“Now, how do we get
it out?” Blair asked, walking around
the structure. After retrieving a
hammer from the garage, they carefully pried several boards up, allowing Day to
jump down to the ground.
"NO!" he
yelled a second later.
"What's
wrong?" Blair asked, concerned.
"It's an
earring, some old gold earring," Day said, the disappointment clearly
evident in his voice.
Several minutes
later, the two friends were sitting on the edge of the gazebo, both too tired
and too depressed to move.
"I'm never going
to find it," Day said, softly.
Blair looked at him
and decided that the truth was probably the best, "I know Day," he
said nudging him, "I think we've looked everywhere. Judging by the state of the lawn, I think
we've dug up everything that beeped."
Day surveyed his once
pristine lawn. "Vin is going to
have my head."
"Yeah, well,
mine's going to be right next to it," Blair said with a laugh, knowing
that when their lover's saw the destruction, laughing would be the furthest
thing from their minds.
Day flopped
backwards, lying on his back staring at the ceiling. Neither man said anything until Day broke the silence, “Hey, Blair, look here,” he called to his
friend.
"What?"
"Come here,
what's this? He said, lying on his stomach, looking through the hole they had
made. He pointed to a semi-visible
outline of a square in the dirt.
"I don't know,
let's see."
After both lowering
themselves to the ground, they began to clear off the dirt around the
area. Half of it went under the edge of
the gazebo and was covered by the grass.
"What do you
think it is?" Day asked.
"I have no idea,"
Blair said, "maybe a bomb shelter from World War II?"
Day smiled,
"Want to try to open it?" he asked with a laugh, mischief gleaming in
his eye.
Blair laughed,
"I don't know if we can. Plus,
that wall," he said, pointing to the north side of the gazebo, “is on top
of it."
"Oh, come on, a
little adventure, a little excitement.
I bet we can take a couple of the lower boards off and that'll give us
enough room to at least open it up and see what's inside."
Blair nodded, curious
and not seeing that it could be that big of a deal.
Another half hour wasted collecting tools and
equipment and it wasn’t until around three in the afternoon that the assault on
the Gazebo actually began. Walking down the slight hill from the house carrying
a crowbar, Day was stopped short.
There on the edge of
the lawns stood Mark Coletrane, hands on his hips, eyeing the lawns with a
puzzled look on his face.
“Day veered off
track, dropping the item. “Oh, Mark, hi, how’s it going?” Day started casually
as though torn up sod and mud piles were a common occurrence at Halcyon
Heights.
“My God, Day, what
the hell happened here?” Coletrane looked like he could cry.
God, get a grip here, man, it’s lawn just fucking lawn, Day thought. Never one to understand the thrill of gardening,
a pleasure that Vincent was always trying to teach him, Damien liked his earth
natural and on the other side of the window.
“Just a little
accident, that’s all, Mark. Don't go all postal on me. Vin’s aware of it. We’re
looking for a gas leak,” partial truth is
always good, Day reminded himself.
“I got sidetracked
this week with the rain we had at the beginning. Vin said it would be fine to
do the lawn on Saturday.”
“Yes, yes that’s
fine, but just the front lawns, okay? Wouldn’t want the mower to hit that bad
line now would you. Puff!” Day accentuated the situation with a hand gesture
throwing the earth up in an explosion.
“Are you sure?” Mark
still didn’t quite buy the explanation, watching Blair move around the gazebo
with more tools.
“Did you call the gas
company?” the gardener asked.
“Of course we called
British Gas,” Day said exasperatedly.
“Look, do you want me to call Vin out, he’s painting, but if you
insist?” Day bluffed, laying his cards
face down on the table, praying to whatever gods looked out for brats.
Mark looked at him
strangely. He could have sworn that his lover, Peter Bailey, had mentioned Vin
was planning on a trip into London this week with his American friend. Vincent
had wanted to make sure Doc Bailey was in London, too, in case his friend
needed medical attention.
“Fine, Damien. I’ll
do the front and I’ll come back mid-week to finish up the back. How does that
sound?”
“Great, that’s super,
Coletrane, just super.”
Mark turned and
shaking his head at one last look at the ruined lawns, he went around to the
front of the house.
Running to pick up
his tool, Day hurried towards the gazebo, eager for his and Blair's adventure
to begin.
Jim sat on the small
garden swing. Lunch was over and Vin was demanding more introspection. A
mutinous look had shadowed his eyes momentarily, but rather than the command to
assume the position, he was sent outside to reflect in the garden.
Vincent had gone off
to make a phone call. He said he needed to check on the brats.
When Vincent entered
the garden, he didn’t seem too happy. “No answer. That’s odd. I told Day I
wouldn’t call until this evening, but he usually takes the phone with him when
he’s out sunning on the terrace.”
“It’s probably too
cold. Blair hates the cold and he won’t be too keen on sitting out if the
temperatures are as low as they said on the news this morning.” Then thinking
about it, he added, “Maybe they went off to do some shopping. I know Blair
likes trinkets, souvenirs of places he’s been.”
“Possibly,” Vin sat
looking at the flowers reflectively, but not really seeming assured by the
suggestion.
“I just know my brat
and I think you were right about them being up to something. I’ll just try
again later.” Coming over to Jim, Vin
motioned for him to rise. Vin seated himself on the swing and reaching up
pulled Ellison down on his lap. Jim twisted, still uncomfortable with the
gesture, fearing Patrick might show up.
“Sit!” Vin said
sternly. “I want to talk to you, Jim, before we go back inside and give you
more opportunity to express yourself.”
He could feel Ellison
relax, knowing that he was not one to pour out his soul, and Vincent almost
smiled at the simple shift in weight.
So alike all men in facing their demons, so eager to run away rather
than voice their fears and concerns, Vincent knew they sometimes needed a
push---a strong man to back them into a corner.
“I’m just concerned
that you’re not handling your brat right.”
Jim tried to pull
away, but Vincent held him firmly in place, raising a suggested hand near his
bottom in case he didn’t see the reason for sitting still.
“I can’t handle him
the way you do Damien. He wouldn’t respond well to that type of relationship
and I know he’d just up and leave if it came to an iron hand.”
“That might be true,
but I’ve seen him show a lot more attitude than I think is good in the
beginnings of even a mildly disciplinarian relationship. You’re only setting
him up for more hurt down the road. Are you afraid he won’t agree to continue
the relationship?” Vincent forced the issue, making Jim realize his own fears
in the commitment.
“No, if he says he
doesn’t want to continue, that’s fine, it’s his choice. I’ve always told him
that. I love him. I don’t care if he has a few faults, I love him for the
faults, too, but he admits he needs the guidance right now. We’ve had some
close calls these last few months and they could have been avoided if he didn’t
feel so unraveled.” Jim paused as though weighing his next words carefully. “He
wants me to discipline him, take him in hand, but he’s still afraid.”
Looking up at Vin’s
brown eyes, he continued cautiously, “He’s been expressing concerns about how
you handle Damien.”
Instead of the anger
Ellison was sure to see in the muddy eyes, Vincent looked down at him and burst
out laughing. It was a gut wrenching, belly laugh that had Ellison sitting up
thinking Vincent had lost his mind.
Tears were pooling in
the dark orbs and Vincent swiped at them with a huge hand. Coughing, trying to
regain some composure he looked at his friend, “I’m sorry, Jim, it’s just funny
from where I’m sitting, I guess. Day can appear to be the sweetest, gentlest
soul on the face of this earth. It’s so apropos he uses the Saint portion of
his last name in his e-mail name and all, and he’s that, I admit, but he’s a
lot more as well. Blair doesn’t know the brat that I know. Most times after he’s punished or awaiting
punishment, Day will accuse me of being too easy on him. I think he actually
wants the firm hand and if I ease up too much on him, he just keeps pushing
until I have to take him in hand again.”
Looking at Ellison,
he creased his brow in a query-like look of a teacher to a student, finally
asking the one question that’s really going to require some thinking. “Do you
think maybe even by his concerns for Day, that maybe Blair is asking you if
it’s the same kind of firm hand that he needs?”
“No,” Jim said a
little too quickly. Then seeing the look Vin gave him, he thought better of
such affirmation, “well, possibly, but I really don’t believe so, not yet anyway.”
“Well, we’ll see. I
just think that if Blair truly felt Day was in an abusive relationship, he
would do everything in his power to get him away from me.” Vincent stood up, stretching the kinks from
his back. “Well, let’s concentrate on you again, Jimbo. Come on,” he called as
Ellison still sat there thinking through their conversation, “let’s get back to
you.”
The old gazebo was
barely recognizable. Damien, figuring the crawl space too tight for serious
digging, decided to upend some of the floorboards above. Structurally, it was a
bad idea. Several of the floorboards, which were initially removed with all
intentions of repositioning them when through, were rotted and held in place
with rusty nails. One more floorboard along the outer rim and half the railing
toppled as well.
Blair looked at his
friend growing concerned with the demonic possession that seemed to have
consumed Damien St. Claire. “Day, my God, the whole thing could topple down on
us if we remove any more boards.”
Day stopped prying at
one of the boards and seemed to only then realize how much had been
destroyed. "Oh, wow," he
muttered, "Guess I was sort of taking my frustrations about my ring out on
the building here."
Blair gave a small
laugh, "Well, I guess it's cheaper than therapy."
As they finally eased
their bodies down into the space under the Gazebo, they realized they would
have had to bend from the waist to stand.
It was only a four-foot clearance above the soft earth. Day jumped
through the floorboards first, pulling the pick and shovel with him. Blair came
next with two flashlights. The earth
was much softer here in this corner.
Blair’s feet sunk into the thick mud. The earth didn’t get any sunlight
under this portion of the gazebo and no doubt the rainwater flowed freely here
coming down from the house and moving towards the river at the end of the
slope.
Damien started with
the shovel, but soon he hit something solid and hard. Picking up the pick he
stood up over the broken floorboards and angled back. Losing his balance he
tumbled backwards hooking the end of the pick onto some more boards, loosening
more of the flooring of the gazebo. “Ooops,” was his only comment on the
accident.
However, once
striking something hard, he could not be swayed. He leveled his pick again,
this time however he struck home. The pick was solidly imbedded in a large
object, no doubt made of wood. “Are you sure it’s not another gas line?” Blair
asked, looking very worried.
“No…you heard me ask
the British Gas worker if there were any other lines on the grass, he said
no…only around the house, through the garden and again out front. So, we’re
clear, man, home free here.”
“Now, are you going
to help me get this pick out or not?”
Blair laid his hands
on the pick and both young men pulled with all their might. So concentrated on
their efforts, they hardly felt the earth shift, the mud move beneath their
feet as a huge maw opened into the earth. Their last recollection was sliding
downward, Day sitting in Blair’s lap like two little kids on a bobsled ride,
gliding down a hill. Mark Coletrane who was riding the mower off towards the
long driveway could not hear the scream they both emitted in unison.
The time was six
o’clock, Saturday night, and the phone was ringing persistently inside the huge
Tudor home. A hundred miles away, two ex-military men were growing mildly
concerned.
Blair fought the
rising panic during the long slide downward. It wasn’t so much that they
traveled far, but that the angle was directly down. Injured bones would have
been unavoidable, except for the surrounding earth being mostly soft mud. It
did not keep them from landing on their bottoms with a heavy jarring. Day’s
head hit Blair’s chin, causing him to bite his lip. Day tumbled forward and hit
the side of the shaft that was shored up with boards. There was still enough
twilight filtering through the remaining floorboards of the gazebo above to
show both brats that they had fallen into a small, underground room.
Blair eased himself
up into a sitting position. “Are you all right?” he asked his friend.
Day rubbed his head
frantically. Touching a warm, sticky matting of hair, his voice quivered
slightly, “I think so, I’m bleeding though.”
Blair felt along the
pile of earth and planks that had accompanied them down into the shaft. When his hand hit the cold metal he eagerly
grabbed the cylinder. Lighting it
quickly, he aimed the beam at Day. Scooting over on his hands and knees, he
checked Day’s pupils. They were fine, but Day was not encouraged.
“I could have a
concussion,” he pouted, obviously feeling more vulnerable than Blair. He should be partnered with a cop, he’d get
used to the small hassles of life, liking getting shot at, roughed up by
rednecks, and jumping into waterfalls, Blair thought. This is kid’s stuff. However, when Blair aimed the flashlight
overhead, the child’s play was shelved in his mind. This was indeed serious
business. The gazebo had fallen in as well, a muddy mess rimmed the edges of
the hole, boards and earth teetered above. It was too high to climb out of;
yet, the simplest disturbance might bring the whole gazebo and all the
surrounding mud on top of them.
Once again, James
Ellison, detective in Major Crimes at Cascade Police Department was lying over
Vincent Cade’s knees. His butt bared
and vulnerable, red and warm he felt like a little kid in the hands of a loving
and devoted father. Embarrassed by the scenario, yet feeling relieved and open,
he still fought to hold back the one piece of information that weighed heavily
upon his soul.
“What else is
bothering you, Jim? You know what it is. You woke up last night because of
it.” Vincent waited patiently, the
paddle lying on the sofa next to him, ready to be picked up and used again. For
a quick moment his mind’s eye brought another figure over his knee, the one he
was growing more and more concerned with as time progressed. Realizing his
responsibilities to the man now positioned for his attentions, he pushed that
thought back for later analysis. He needed to give his friend his full
attention right now, but in a short bit, he would be more than willing to give
his full ministrations to Damien St. Claire.
“Vin, I’ve told you
everything I’ve felt or thought since this crime started. I can’t tell you
anything else. Let’s just let it go. Let’s forget it.” Ellison didn’t sound
very convincing. There was an underlying desperation in the speech, not for an
end to the paddling, but for the fear of discovery.
“Still not
cooperating, Jimbo. Still not aware of how this particular game is played.”
Vincent reached for the paddle. “Your problem is you’re still too much in
control.”
Vin took a heavy and
deep inhalation of breath, steeling himself for the performance. He changed, as
though cloaking himself in another persona. “ENOUGH!” he yelled.
Ellison jerked in
surprise.
“I’VE HAD ENOUGH.
YOU’RE NOT IN CONTROL ANYMORE, MISTER. YOU HAVE NO CONTROL OVER ANYTHING.” With
that final, loud appraisal of the situation, Vin began a hard and rhythmic
assault on the uplifted globes. They were still red and stinging from
ministrations a few minutes before.
Jim began to cry
again at the fist stroke. “Vin, please.
It hurts.” Jim stated the obvious.
“I certainly hope so,
little boy,” Vin taunted. “I hope it stings. You want it to hurt, though, don’t
you?” Vincent asked, gauging the situation by far more than the reddened flesh.
“Don’t you?” he
yelled, delivering several extremely harsh blows.
“Yeessss,” the sob
escaped.
“Why, Jim. Just tell
me why?”
“Because I was happy
they were dead. When it was all over, I was happy it was them and not Blair. I
can’t forgive myself that selfish thought.” Ellison crumbled like a leaf,
brittle to the winds, dried up and lifeless, no more resiliencies in his spirit
to ward off the truth.
Vin pulled him up
quickly, turning him in his lap. Ellison began to cry like a man who had lost
his soul. He mourned his own humanity.
“Talk to me, Jimmy.
Talk to me.” Vincent spoke gently now. A man of many fragments to his whole, he
pieced them into place as the situation called for.
Jim buried his face
deep against the sturdy shoulder, grabbing pieces of the cable-knit Vincent
wore, he wanted to get inside this man, hide beneath him as though he could
find peace there.
“It wasn’t enough
being aware of how easy each and every one of them could have been Blair; it
wasn’t enough hating Blair for making me love him as I did; no, I had to
actually find happiness when it was all over that it was them and not
Sandburg.” He paused, taking the handkerchief
Vincent once again offered him. Blowing
his nose, wiping his eyes, he seemed to gain some composure.
“I remember looking
at their photos when Brickstone confessed. One final look to acknowledge who
and what they were. I’ve always done that after a case is closed. It’s like I
have to give them that one final audience, promising to remember them. But this
time,” the tears started fresh, he choked up, “this time, I remember looking at
them and smiling, thinking I’m glad it wasn’t Blair. Thanking them for being
the victims and sparing someone I loved.”
“Maybe it’s just time
I quit being a cop. I just know that’s not how a cop is supposed to feel.”
“Jim, you can’t
control thoughts like that. None of us can. When I was a Major, I took a
platoon into Viet Nam. We lost one man on that mission. I didn’t like him. He
was brash, and he had a chip on his shoulder. I felt terrible that I had lost a
man, he was my first casualty. And when it was over, I remembered sitting in a
bar and drinking myself into a stupor, because I was glad if I had to lose a
man, that it was him.” Vincent ran a tired hand across his face. Then seeing the blue eyes boring into him he
smiled.
“Yeah, Jimmy, we’re
human. We think things after a stressful situation that we can’t help. It just
comes to the forefront and we have no control over it. It doesn’t mean we are
bad. We don’t even mean it, I don’t think. I think it’s just our mind’s way of
dealing with situations we have no control over. Putting them into some kind of
sense, some semblance of order in the universe. If you couldn’t stop these men
from dying, you had to justify it with some counter balance in the light of
day. So the one good thing to you was it wasn’t Blair…you hung on to that
thought like a drowning man to a rope. Just as I did that day in Nam.”
Ellison slowly eased
himself from Vin’s lap. Sitting next to the solidly built ex-Lt. Colonel, he
felt small and helpless. Vin reached his arm around him and pulled him close,
resting his chin on the other’s head. “We’re not bad men, Jimmy. We’re just
survivors, hoping to rise up and fight again.”
The phone rang
loudly, shattering the silence of their reflection. Ellison straightened,
Vincent stood up, “It’d better be Day,” he ground out.
“Vin, how are you?”
Dr. Peter Bailey asked.
“Fine, Pete. I’m
sorry I didn’t call, but I won’t be needing your help this weekend. So if you
wanted to head back to Salisbury tonight, that’s fine.” He looked over at
Ellison assuring himself that his friend was fine and handling the revelations
well.
“Actually, that’s why
I was calling. Just to make sure you meant this weekend. Mark called me and
said he went over to Halcyon to cut your lawn. Day met him and said you were
home painting. I thought that was strange considering the state of the lawn and
the gazebo.”
Vincent Cade straightened
to his full six foot four inch frame. His eyes slit into fine lines of burning
fire. Ellison caught the look, wiped his eyes with the handkerchief and rose as
well. Something was wrong.
“What state?” Vincent
ground the words out like a wood chipper each syllable edged with concern,
harsh and demanding.
Damien was cold, wet,
and sore all over. The slide into the twenty-five foot pit had brought enough
debris down on their heads, to cause minor cuts and abrasions, but not enough
to climb out. There was still a deep side to the enclosure. Blair had deducted
that it must have been an old icehouse, used during the early twenties.
“I’m cold,” Damien
muttered for the umpteenth time, petulantly jutting his lower lip out.
“Well join the club.
You think you’re the only one uncomfortable,” Blair said, as he tried to stand.
A steady rain had started overhead. It was the icy chill of a frosty night,
picking up the cold winds from the river, it angled down between the broken
boards overhead and fell relentlessly.
Blair eyed the area,
the soft mud dripping along the side walls, the puddles that were starting to
fill the small area. His concerns right now were directed towards drowning.
“Day, we’re going to
have to start thinking of a way to get out of here. It rains a lot in England,
doesn’t it?”
“Yeah, especially
this time of year. Hey, let’s yell. Coletrane might still be here.”
At that, both men
started yelling in turns, “HELP!”
“HELP!”
They kept it up until
their throats were raw. They kept it up while hope still shined brightly in the
corners of their soul. They kept it up until the rains started pounding down.
Then in desperation they sank slowly into the mud, each lost in the misery of
his own self-realization.
“I’m sure you can
handle this car better than this,” Ellison grumbled hanging on for dear life as
it was. “Maybe I should drive,” he suggested, catching the harsh glare Cade
threw his way.
Cade was making the
drive in record time as it was, but he was well aware of Ellison’s penchant for
reckless endangerment when he was mad, upset or worried and behind the wheel.
“It’s ten, we should
be there in another twenty minutes. Here,” he took his cell phone out of his
breast pocket and handed it to Jim, “try Coletrane again. Then the house.”
Ellison repeated the
dialing procedure they had memorized since leaving the flat. Coletrane must
have gone to a pub after his week’s work was done and since his lover was out
of town. As concern grew, Ellison had
to restrain himself as well as Cade from calling in the police. It would have
been highly embarrassing for both young men, but he was just as concerned as
Vin.
“I swear, Jim, if
he’s hurt or…” he slammed his palm against the steering wheel.
“You’ll take care of
him and forgive him,” Jim said logically, used to hearing the wild threats.
“Oh, I’ll take care
of him all right, but someplace where he’ll remember for quite some time the
fright he gave me.”
As they pulled in
front of the house, the only lights visible were from the living room. Both men rushed into the hallway and headed
directly for the large room. A fire glowed, barely alive now, illuminating a
pile of pillows and blankets so deep and so widespread, Cade froze on the step
into the room.
Then casting
concerned glances at each other, both men raced forward thinking that whatever
they were looking for must surely be trapped beneath the landslide of wool,
polyester, and down. The realization of
the icy coldness in the house finally struck them.
“It’s freezing in
here,” Cade noted, rubbing his hands together.
“DAMIEN!” he yelled.
“BLAIR!” Ellison
added.
Silence echoed the
hollow halls. The rain pelted against the windows increasing its fury.
“Jim, can you hear
them? Are they in the house?” Cade asked.
Jim’s face was drawn
from the self-introspection forced upon him these last two days. He stopped to
stair off into the distance, and then turned to Vin. “No, there’s no one in the house but us.”
“Can you try
outside? Do we need to go out there to
help you hear?” Vin asked, a little confused on exactly how his friend’s
hearing worked.
“Okay, but you need
to know something. I have periods when I zone out. When I focus so intensely on
one sense that I lose all others. You have to watch me and if it happens, you
have to call to me and bring me back. Can you do that?”
“Jim, right now I can
do anything I need to do to find Day and Blair.”
Walking to the window overlooking the back gardens, Jim concentrated. He heard the rain loud and persistent, then he heard the mewing of a cat. He turned to Cade.
“I can’t make out
much other than the rain, but I hear your cat.”
“Where is that stupid
animal? Maybe she is with them.”
“Outside, come on,”
Jim took off at a run and Vincent Cade was right behind him.
The mud was in his
hair, his mouth, every orifice seemed to ooze with the thick, black goo. Even
the heavy rain that was un-relentless had little effect on cleansing. Blair
cupped his hands together for the third time, leaning his sturdy frame up
against the shored off walls of the pit.
Twice before they had
tried this routine and twice before, like a circus act gone bad, they had
tumbled down into the water now at least three feet deep. The soft earth
beneath Blair’s feet only softened the more with the added weight of the blond
man. There was no way Blair could gain purchase on the soft earth to boost
Damien up to the edge of the hole.
“It’s no use,” Day
said, as he wearily placed his foot in Blair’s joined hands, “we won’t make it.
I’m cold and I want Vincent,” he moaned like a child demanding his mother.
“I’m cold, too, Day,
but giving up is not an option. The guys might not return until tomorrow. We
could drown down here before then, or be buried in a landslide of mud,” Blair
began teetering almost immediately as he tried to help Day up along the wall.
“Hold me, Blair, hold
me. I can’t take another dunking,” Damien whined.
“Then grab onto
something. You have to try harder. You’re not even trying, St. Claire,” Blair
was getting totally disgusted with Damien’s lack of resolve. For someone who
could not be swayed from his objective, for someone who wanted to win so badly
at everything he did, Blair could not believe how childishly reticent he could
be when placed in a dangerous situation.
Where Blair was used
to finding a steel-like shaft within his backbone when necessary, Day seemed
inclined only to complain and bitch. Sandburg’s quick thinking had saved him
just as often as Jim’s intervention.
Day tried to position
his shoe on Blair’s shoulder, but he was so intent on watching his feet, making
sure they were securely positioned, he made no attempt to grab high onto some
anchor. Teetering again, Blair tried to
remain steady, but the added weight with little or no assistance from Day made
it impossible to stay upright. Falling
back again, a loud splash echoed the enclosure as both young men were submerged
below the fast-filling pool.
They sputtered up
together. “God, I’m not doing anything, nothing else,” Damien whined, spitting
water from his mouth, mud plastered to his hair. He looked like a refuge from
the Titanic. “Vincent will come. I’ll
just wait for Vincent.” This was said firmly as he walked the short distance to
the corner and leaned back into it. The water was now up to both men’s waist.
Sandburg rose out of
the water, not like a bedraggled survivor, but with a rage at the
circumstances, the weather, and one very uncooperative friend.
He grabbed Day’s
shirtfront and pulled him forward, pushing him back against the corner of the
pit. “You listen to me, Damien St. Claire, you are not going to sit here on
your laurels and wait for anybody. We don’t have that option. I’m sure Vin and
Jim will come. I’m also sure we’re going to regret our actions today, but I am
not going to let you sit here feeling sorry for yourself.” The hazel eyes rebelled. First slitting into
small windows of contempt. The blue eyes narrowed as well, each fighting the
silent battle for power.
It was Day who
finally broke eye contact first. Looking at the rising water around them, the
quivering blue lips of his friend who was trying to help them, he felt a moment
of shame. Biting his lower lip, he nodded in acquiescence.
“Good. Now take a few
minutes to think. Help me find a way out of here,” Blair said, releasing his
shirt.
The soft mewling was
the only sound Jim could discern with the harsh pounding rain. Rushing out into
the night, Vin on his heels, he tripped as soon as he hit the lawns.
Vin helped him up and
looked angrily around, the lights from the large window in the living room
highlighting the lumps and clumps of sod and dirt piled everywhere. It looked
like small land mines had been set off sporadically around the grounds.
“Damn it,” Vin
growled, “what the hell happened here? Mark wasn’t exaggerating.”
“Come on,” Jim said,
testing his leg. “This way.”
Desi was walking back
and forth in the rain along the side of what used to be a gazebo. Now, though
still standing, it was lopsided and structurally skeletal. Large portions of
the side railings and trelliswork along the bottom, and floorboards, were
pulled up and angled off. Jim’s first
impulse was to run up into the Gazebo, but his foot landed on the step and
Sentinel hearing took over. The whole structure trembled, the frame squeaking
in protest against the added weight.
Extending a hand to
stop Cade who was just as determined to find his brat, Jim pushed him back.
“It’s weak. Wait a minute.” Now he could hear it. It was the one sound that
centered him in the entire world. This was the one sound that assured him of
his own place in things. Sandburg’s heartbeat, steady and strong, called out to
him. The other one was picked up as well, but this one was accompanied by a
soft hitching sound, someone very much upset.
“BLAIR!” Jim called
out.
“JIM!” the answer
came back to him. “JIM, WE’RE UNDER THE GAZEBO.”
“I’M COMING.” Jim
called back.
“Vin, go get a sturdy
rope, maybe some planking if you have it.”
Before Vin followed
instructions, he stooped low looking under the gazebo, past the broken trellis
to the large patch of mud under the broken floorboards, “DAY! Is Damien all
right?”
“VIIIINNNNNNN!” a
loud wail pierced the night. It was so shrill that Ellison cringed at the
assault to his senses.
“ARE YOU ALL RIGHT,
DAY?” Vin still was not assured.
“I’m COLD, I’m WET,
I’m MISERABLE…”
“ENOUGH! I’m COMING!”
and Vincent Cade took off to collect the necessary objects.
The brats were both
dressed in flannel pajamas. The brand new clothes were still in their plastic
wrappers, gifts Cade had received through the years, not recognizing his need
to sleep in boxers and a T-shirt only. Blair wore a blue plaid pair. Freshly
showered in the remaining hot water left in the gas hot water tank, he was now
wrapped in a blanket seated on one end of the couch drinking a hot cup of
cocoa.
Damien, similarly dressed
and ministered to, wore red pj’s with bright yellow flags on them. He sat on
the other end of the couch holding his mug to his lips like a petulant child
none-to-thrilled with his treat.
Seated in the
armchair next to Blair, Jim leaned forward his hands on his thighs trying to
watch both boy’s faces as Vincent Cade marched up and down in front of the
raging fire. He had banked it and fed it nicely as no doubt his own temper was
fuming as well, while the brats were securely wrapped for an audience.
“I cannot believe
you,” Vin shouted, catching both young men in his glare, “either one of you.”
Blair had the good
instincts to look down into his mug, brushing his still damp locks behind his
ears. Day, never one to sit patiently through one of Cade’s scoldings, daringly
stared back at the man, his mouth forming a tight line of anger.
“Do you have
something to say, little boy,” however Vin raised his hand before the blond
could answer, “well, of course you do. You always have some kind of
explanation. You are the database of explanations for the whole brat population
of the world, aren’t you?” Vincent ranted.
"Shut the fuck
up, Vin!" Day yelled, "I'm cold, I'm tired, and I sure as hell am NOT
in the mood to be lectured!" He
stood up, knocking the blanket that was around him from his shoulders, slamming
his drink down on the table. Standing
there he glared at his lover.
Vincent looked right
back, then taking a deep breath to calm himself, he replied, "And I,
little boy, am not in the mood to be fishing you out from an abandoned ice
house in the freezing rain, worried sick about you. Not to mention dragging someone out with you and putting them in
danger."
At that comment,
Blair who was sitting there in awe of his friend standing up to his lover,
jumped into the conversation, "Hey, wait a minute. I didn't get dragged anywhere…"
"Blair, stay out
of it," Jim ordered.
"No way,
man. This is important. I went willingly with Day. I am as much of a
participant as he was."
Day flashed Blair a
grateful smile for his loyalty before returning to look at his lover, a
sarcastic smirk on his face.
Vin took another deep
breath and briefly closed his eyes, then walking purposely toward Day, he said,
"Come on, little boy. I am in no
mood to deal with your attitude, your language or this whole
situation." Gripping his arm
firmly, he frog-marched a protesting Damien toward one of the far corners of
the room. "Plant yourself there
until you can find a more civil attitude.
You are already in enough trouble, Demon, I know you don't want to get
in any more."
Day opened his mouth
as if to say something but a hard swat to his bottom and a simple 'don't' from
Vin seemed to change his mind. He
turned and faced the corner, arms crossed, an air of anger rippling off of him.
From his chair, Blair
also seethed. "Vin," he said
angrily, upset by the treatment of his friend and the unfairness, as he
perceived it. "Don't you dare
punish Day for getting me involved, I went willingly, I helped, I encouraged, I
am to blame as much as he is.
You…"
"Blair!"
Jim barked, standing up and towering over his lover. "This is not your business."
"Shut up,
Jim! I can say what I want and I can
stand up for what I believe. You can’t
control that and he" Blair said jerking his head in contempt toward Vin,
"can't lord over me like he does you and Day. I DO NOT see him as the end all of how I should
behave." His rant finished, and
now facing his angry lover and an annoyingly amused host, Blair seemed to sink
back into his chair.
"Little
boy," Vin said calmly, "Damien is being punished for how he spoke to
me. He is not being punished for
getting you involved. I allow
disagreement, but I do not allow cursing or being disrespectful to your
partner. Damien knows that and he knows
that he can face the corner until he gets his attitude in check and is willing
to discuss what happened calmly.
Now," he said pausing, "what your lover allows is different
matter entirely."
Holding out his hand
to Blair, Jim said, "Come on, I want to talk to you."
"What if I don't
want to talk to you?" Blair said sullenly, burrowing slightly more into
his blankets.
"Well, you have
a choice; you can either come with me so we can talk or I can haul you out of
that chair, put you over my knee and spank you and then we can talk." Looking at his partner, he added, "I
would think the first option is the best."
"Those choices
suck, Jim."
"So does your
attitude right now and if you keep it up, option number one is going to be
gone."
"Fine, fine,
fine." Blair said, throwing off the blankets and stomping down the hall
where Jim had indicated.
Jim sighed and shook
his head at his lover's back.
As he passed Vin, the
older man gently grabbed his arm, "Jim, he is working things out, trying
to deal with the conflicting sides of what he sees, what he thinks he should
feel and what he actually does. He
needs a firm hand and he may not like it, but he knows he needs it. You just have to let him figure that out for
himself. Suaviter in modo, fortiter in
re---gentle in manner, firm in deed."
"Thanks, I'll
try." He gestured toward Day who was cautiously turning around,
"looks like you have your own brat to deal with."
Vin nodded,
"Give me about 15 minutes before coming back in here, if you would."
"Sure, no
problem. I think it will take that long
with Blair, too. He may be
contemplating his actions in a corner as well."
"It works
well. Bring him back in here though -
don't want a Blair-icle in the dining room." Vin added just as Jim was
turning to follow his lover, "Jim, I do want to talk to you about the
punishment for these two. I want to
make sure we're on the same page. Maybe
when they've gone to bed."
Jim nodded,
"OK."
As Vin watched his
friend walk down the hall heading toward the dining room, he mentally steeled
himself for dealing with his own lover.
Turning back toward the corner, he said, "Are you ready to
talk?"
Day nodded, "I'm
sorry I cursed at you earlier and that I yelled at you."
Sitting down on the
loveseat, Vin held open his arms, “Come here, Demon."
Day hurried over and
almost threw himself into the waiting arms, gripping the front of Vin's shirt
as he curled up.
Bringing the blanket
over from the back of the couch, Vin draped it over both of them, tucking it in
snuggly around his lover. "You are
still cold,” he muttered, pulling Day in closer.
"What do you
expect, you made me stand in the corner," Day said, exhaustion creeping
into his voice.
"Little boy, you
are lucky that you were not standing there with a soapy mouth and a red bottom
after the way you talked to me."
"I know, I'm
sorry. I just got all mad. You were mad, Jim probably will never let me
near Blair again, not that Blair would want to come near me after I got him in
so much trouble. I didn’t want to tell
you I lost your ring and I’m so sorry for that. It means more than anything that you wanted to give it to
me. I couldn’t help myself; I had to
wear it.”
“Well my little
demon, we are in this relationship to maybe get you to start trying to help
yourself when something tempts you.
Right?”
Day nodded, knowing
where this conversation was going and not liking it.
“And you’ve been
doing good about thinking before you do something. Haven’t you?”
Day nodded again,
“I’m trying, I swear I am. I just
forget sometimes.”
“I know and I know
that we are going to be spending this week making sure that you don’t forget
anytime soon. I think spending tomorrow
on punishment detention will help. The
last month or so, you seem to be forgetting more and more---the painting, your
tantrum over not winning, the argument you got into with Mark, just to name a
few.”
“I know and I’m
sorry,” he burrowed his head in deeper and gripped Vin’s shirt tightly. “Don’t be mad at me.”
Vin hugged him close
and kissed his head, “Little boy, I love you more than anything in the
world. I may be frustrated with you, I
may look forward to turning you over my knee and impressing upon you just how
displeased I am with you, but I am not mad at you.”
“Are you going to
spank me tonight?” Day asked a few
minutes later.
“No, not
tonight. Tonight, I am going to get you
tucked into that nest of blankets by the fire with the rest of us. I’ll paddle you tomorrow morning after
breakfast. Sometime this week, I think
we are going to be going down to Bath to see Levi, you need a new paddle and I
think after this stunt, Jim is going to want to go shopping with Blair.”
Day nodded, not
saying anything, simply enjoying being held, being close to his lover.
In the dining room,
Blair was pacing around, hands waving in angry gestures in a futile attempt to
get Jim to agree with him. “But, Jim,
it’s not fair. I was as much as a
willing participant in this as Day, Vin shouldn’t punish him for getting me
involved.”
Jim leaned casually
back on the table, arms crossed, “Blair, stop for a minute and listen to
me.” When the younger man barely
paused, Jim uncrossed his arms, reached out and snagged his partner. Pulling him down across his body, Jim
delivered two hard swats to his partner’s bottom. “I said to stop.”
Blair glared at him
when he was allowed up, “Fine, I’ve stopped, stopped trying to defend a
friend’s actions, stopped speaking my mind and voicing my opinion even though
you swore to me that you would never use our relationship or our agreement to
do that to me!” Blair’s voice rose until he was almost screaming, “You swore to
me and you did it anyway! I knew this
wasn’t going to work! I knew you were
trying to change who I am!”
Jim looked at his
partner in almost shock. He had no idea
where this was coming from and didn’t know how to handle it. He reached out, “Blair…”
“Don’t touch me! You swore to me that you wouldn’t change who
I am but you have and you are going to keep doing it!”
“Blair, I have no
idea what you are talking about,” Jim said, trying to keep his emotions under
control, figuring that at least one of them should. “Explain to me what you mean.”
“No” Blair spat out,
“I don’t have to explain anything to you, you’ve changed me and you swore you
wouldn’t. I don’t even want to talk to
you right now. Get away from me!”
“Fine, you don’t want
to talk. Great, we aren’t going to
talk, but I am not going to let you go stomping off by yourself. We have an agreement and this tantrum of
yours is out of hand.” With that, he
grabbed Blair’s arms and moved toward the door back to the living room.
“Let go of me! You are not going to spank me! You…”
“Be quiet,
Blair. No, I’m not going to spank you,”
Jim said, still pulling the other man back toward the living room, “but you are
going to stand in the corner until you calm down enough to speak to me like a
rational person. I am not going to
listen to you ranting without an explanation.”
“Jim…” Blair began,
indignantly.
“Don’t speak to me in
that tone of voice, Sandburg,” was all Jim said.
"I hate you! Get off me!
You promised and you lied to me!"
Blair continued to yell as he was walked into the living room, still
pulling and struggling to get out of Jim's grasp. "You lied to me and I thought I could trust you and I
can't!" That final revelation seemed
to break the younger man, tears sprang up.
Jim stopped for a
moment, and looked at his partner in amazement, "Blair," he said
gently, reaching out to comfort him, "Talk to me, I don't know what you
mean, I don't know what I did to get you so upset, I swear to you, I haven't
tried to change you. I love
you."
"Don't say
that!" he yelled again, twisting to break free.
"Fine," Jim
said, his patience gone. "When you decide to talk to me, I will be willing
to listen, But, until then, you can
stand in the corner and get yourself back under control. I refuse to deal with you when you are
acting this way."
Pulling the still
struggling Blair into the living room, past a startled Vin and Damien, Jim
pushed him into the far corner that Day had recently vacated.
"I hate
you," Blair spat out, "you lied to me."
"Well, you know
what, Chief, you are not my favorite person right now either. Now, I seriously suggest you shut your mouth
and let us both calm down."
The two men locked
eyes until Blair broke first and turned and faced the wall.
Vin and Day sat on
the loveseat, stunned.
Vin spoke first,
"Jim, come with me please."
Leaning down as he stood up, he whispered to Damien, "Speak with
Blair little boy and find out what's going on."
Damien nodded, still
shocked by the amount of anger and raw emotions that had been displayed just
moments ago.
Jim followed Vin up
the step and down the hall into the kitchen.
Once there, Vin leaned against the counter and simply said,
"Explain to me what just happened."
Jim sighed, and
rubbed his hands over his face, "Honestly, I don't know Vin. We were in the dinning room and Blair was
going on and on about how he was a willing participant in the little stunt this
weekend and how it wasn't fair that Damien was going to be punished for his
actions. I was trying to tell him that
he was in deep trouble too and I didn't think that Day was in much, if any
trouble, for bringing him into it but he wouldn't stop. I told him to stop a couple of times but he
wouldn't so, as he passed me, I reached over, grabbed him, bent him across my
lap and gave him a couple swats. They
weren't that hard, more just to get his attention than anything else."
Vin nodded,
"Yeah, I do that with Day sometimes when he isn't listen"
Jim barely acknowledged
what Vin had said, lost in replaying the scene in the dinning room, "He
seemed to lose it. He went off on how I
was changing him even though I promised I wouldn't and he said that I was and I
was going to keep doing it. And.."
he took a deep breath, his voice shaking slightly with the hurt, "he said
he hated me. He's never said that
before to me." He fell silent for
a minute then added in a quiet voice, "what if he really means it."
Vin pulled him into a
quick hug, "He doesn't mean it, little boy, he is upset and hurt about
something and wants you to be the same.
Don't worry, we'll figure it out and get through it."
In the living room,
Day got up from the loveseat and approached his friend, "Blair?" he
asked cautiously.
"Go away, Day, I
don't want to talk to you."
"I think you
might feel better. Just tell me what's
going on? What happened?"
Blair turned from the
corner, "Jim tried to change who I am and he's done it and I'm not going
to let him do it anymore. Being in a
discipline relationship might work for you and I'm glad but it's not who I
am. I don't want to be changed, I'm
happy with who I am." With that, he turned and faced the corner again.
"Ummm….
Okay." Day said. He stayed there a
few more minutes and then walked into the center part of the house to wait for
Vin. Peaking down the hall into the
kitchen, he caught Vin's eye.
Vin motioned for him
to come in. "What did he say,
Damien?"
"Ummm" Day
said, looking between Jim and Vince, "He says he doesn't want to be in a
discipline relationship and that Jim is trying to change who he is and he's
happy with who he is." Then
looking between them again, he added, "But, he's still standing in the
corner. Which would seem to me to
indicate that he still wants to be in your relationship, but is scared. That's how he seemed to me, scared about
something."
"Day, do you
think he's scared that he is really going to be punished for your actions this
weekend?" Jim asked.
Day blushed, "We
both knew we were in trouble yesterday and he didn't seem overly
concerned. I mean," he said
glancing at Vin, "neither one of us is looking forward to being paddled
but he didn't seem to say anything that seemed weird."
Vin nodded,
"Okay, I'm going to go talk to him and get what's bothering him out."
As he pushed off from the counter, he
said to Jim, "And, Jim, if I even get the hint that you are listening in,
I swear, I have a strap upstairs and I will use it on you so hard and so long
that you will be feeling it next week when you leave. Understand me?"
Jim nodded,
"Yeah, I got it."
Damien jumped in,
"Come on, Jim, we'll go back into Vin's studio and I'll show you some of
his new stuff. This way you won't even
be tempted to try to listen. Okay?" Slightly tugging the other man's arm, Day
led him through the swing door that separated the kitchen from the breakfast
room and Vin's studio.
Vin watched as they
went through the door and then walked upstairs to the tower room. Opening a drawer in a low cabinet, he
studied the instruments inside. Deciding
finally on a small paddle with more sting and noise then actual pain, he
carried it back down to the kitchen.
Pouring a glass of water and adding ice, he carried both into the living
room. Setting the paddle down on the
couch, he carried the glass over to Blair who was still standing nose to the
corner. He was hunched over slightly as
if in pain, his arms wrapped around offering himself comfort.
"Blair,"
Vin said softly, turning him around but the shoulder, "here, drink
this. You need to calm down."
From the look of
Blair's face, he has been crying since the argument. He tried to turn away, embarrassed to be seen, but Vin wouldn't
let him. Taking the glass, he sipped a
little before handing it back to the older man.
"Come on, son,
let's sit down and talk and figure out what's going on."
"I don’t want to
talk. Jim lied…."
Vin held up a hand,
"No. Stop. First rule, we are going to talk, but first
we are going to sit down on the couch.
Second rule is that you have to explain yourself, not just make general
comments like 'Jim lied' or 'Jim's trying to change me.’ Now, come on, let's sit down and we will
talk."
Blair allowed himself
to be lead over to the couch, his eyes widened when he saw the paddle sitting
there, pulling away, he said, "You are not going to paddle me."
Grabbing the other
man again, Vin’s voice grew hard and no-nonsense. "Not if you talk to me.
If you don't talk to me, then I will take whatever action I feel is
appropriate to get you to talk."
With that said, he placed the glass on the table within easy reach and
sat on the couch. Pulling the
unresisting man down with him and settling him on his lap, he wrapped his arms
around him and held him tightly.
Blair sat stiffly,
not wanting to relax into the comfort that seemed so natural to accept.
"Now, little
boy, tell me what's going on in that head of yours."
"Jim is trying
to change me. He's done it already and
I don't want to be changed."
"How, little
boy?" Vin asked softly, one hand rubbing Blair's back in an effort to get
him to relax some.
Blair bit his lip as
his eyes filled with tears again and simply shook his head.
"Blair,"
Vin said, his voice growing sterner, "I asked you a question and I expect
an answer: how did Jim change
you?"
Blair shook his head
again, slightly this time, but still not answering.
"Okay, little
boy, I guess we are going to do this the hard way." Quickly, with the ease of someone long
accustomed to the action, he stood Blair up and then resettled him face down
across his knees.
Feeling himself in a
position he knew too well, Blair screamed and began to struggle,
"NO!! STOP!! You can't do this! Jim won't let you! Jim is
the only one who can spank me!!"
"No, little boy,
you told him that you didn't want that sort of relationship with him, so I am
treating you like a houseguest, a friend of mine, who is being rude, and acting
like a brat when we are trying to help him.
Jim has nothing to do with this."
In the studio, Jim
shuddered and gripped the edge of the table he was standing next to at the
sound of his lover's scream.
"It's okay,
Jimbo," Day said quietly, "You know how it is. You know he has to fight some and let
whatever is bothering him boil out of him before you two can fix it. You know Vin won't hurt him."
Jim nodded, not
saying anything, willing himself to dial down his hearing as low as possible
and concentrate on the scenes of beauty around him and not focus on the other
room.
Back in the living
room, Vin had wrapped one of his legs around Blair's to hold him down, a strong
arm was around his waist to keep him close, "Now little boy, are you going
to talk to me or not."
Blair did not answer,
only struggled as little as he could against the strong arms holding him down.
"Your
choice." With that, Vin tugged
down Blair's pajama bottoms and underwear until both were well below his now
bare butt. Leaning over slightly, he
grabbed the paddle from the cushion next to him and raising his hand high,
brought is down sharply on Blair's exposed bottom.
Blair screamed long
and hard, much longer than the simple swat deserved. Vin knew he was screaming and struggling against something much
greater but until he told him what it was, he would be unable to help him. Delivering three more stinging swats, all to
the center of the exposed bottom, he laid the paddle down again and began to
rub the red spots. "Tell me how
Jim changed you, little boy," he said gently.
Blair was sobbing as
if his heart was breaking, "I need him," he said through the thick
sobs.
"What do you
mean, 'you need him'?"
"I need him to
be there for me," Blair said, still crying. "Please let me up, I don't want to talk anymore."
"I'm sorry,
Blair, but we are going to talk. Does
that scare you that you need him to be there?"
Blair did not answer,
only laid there and cried.
Sighing, Vin picked
up the paddle again and gave the bare bottom a half dozen stinging swats
scattered across the surface before Blair finally yelled out "YES!"
"Why?" Vin
said, not putting down the paddle, "You love him. He loves you, you need each other."
"I don't
know."
Vin raised the paddle
and brought it down hard several times, saying, "Don't give me that,
little boy. You know why. So tell
me."
Blair was sobbing
hard.
Vin put down the
paddle, and lifted the younger man up and situated him on his lap. Blair hugged him tightly and cried. Vin stroked his back and said quietly,
"Tell me, little one, tell me what's got you so upset."
In a quiet voice
filled with tears, he said, "I need him to be more than just my
lover. I need him to keep me in line
and I hate that." That admission
seemed almost too much for him and he cried harder, struggling to get away,
"Please let me up, please let me go and handle this by myself."
Vin hugged him
closely, "No, you are right where you need to be. You don't need to go and handle this by
yourself."
"But before Jim,
I could have handled it by myself. I
was strong and self-reliant and I didn't need anyone telling me what to
do. I was independent and my own
person. But now…." His voice trailed
off, the tears still going, the self-hatred so evident to Vin.
"Blair, you are
still strong and self-reliant and your own person. Did Jim change you in that way."
Blair nodded but
didn't say anything.
"How?" Vin
asked gently.
Not answering, Blair shook
his head.
Vin sighed and after
pulling Blair's hands free from his shirt, he quickly flipped the younger man
over again. This time delivering two
hard swats with his hand, he said, "Blair, talk to me. Do I need to use the paddle again?"
Still face down,
Blair talked. "During this case, when Jim was so tied up, and upset and I
couldn't reach him, he was so distant and I couldn't reach him."
"Yes," Vin
said encouragingly, rubbing his back with a large hand.
Blair continued,
"I could feel myself after a couple of weeks almost testing him, doing
stuff that I knew I shouldn't just to see what he would do! I was causing stress for him just to get a
reaction out of him! Have you ever
heard of anything so selfish, my lover is hurting and instead of helping him, I
am causing him more grief. What sort of
horrible person would do that! I would
never have done that before we got into this relationship and I hate it."
"Okay," Vin
said.
"Jim changed me,
he turned me into this horrible person who needs him, who is dependent on him,
who wants him to have some control over his life! He swore to me that he wouldn't change me but he did!" Blair broke down again, the anguish and
self-loathing that he felt toward himself coming to the forefront. "I don't want to have the same
relationship that you and Day have, I want to be my own person and I want to be
independent. I'm sorry, I know it's
right for you and him, but I'm scared of it.
I'm scared of giving Jim too much control because what if he leaves me
or dies or something and then I'll be left alone and I can't need him that much
or be too dependent on him because even now, I don't think I could stand it if
something happened and he wasn't there any more." The last of his fears spilling forth in one
long cleansing breath shook his body with tremors.
Scooping up Blair
again and holding him close, Vin slowly rocked him, rubbing his back, allowing
him to cry out his fears.
"Shhhhhh, it's okay, little one.
Let it out. That's an awful big
fear to have kept to yourself, no wonder you are all upset. Shhhhhh, we can deal with it." Slowly
rocking the younger man clinging to him, Vin thought about his next step.
Vincent sat with Blair for some time. Gently stroking the distraught young man’s back he held him as any man would hold a confused and frightened child. Slowly rocking back and forth, interjecting a “shhhing” sound when he knew nothing else could console his guest.
When Blair had
settled down enough, Vincent pulled him up, “Come on. You need to get to bed.”
Helping the
anthropologist up, he walked him over to the cocoon of blankets and comforters
and pillows. Leaving him standing on
his own long enough to make two separate beds in front of the hearth, he
positioned one of the numerous pillows down in the middle and helped the
pajama-clad younger man down.
Pulling the covers up
and over him, he brushed the hair away from his eyes.
“Where’s Jim?” Blair
said, still needing the man he loved more than life itself.
“He’ll be along,
shortly. He’ll be right next to you, here. Just rest. Let it go and give
yourself up to sleep. Lord knows you’ve had a trying day. The Demon can try the
best of men.”
He saw a small smile
twist itself into view, despite the red eyes and tear-stained cheeks. “He does
have a way about him,” Blair said, though there was a fondness in the
accusation.
“He has a way all
right, but his way usually heads him towards hell.”
Blair yawned and
nodded his head as he turned towards the fire, hugging the pillow. Before
Vincent could even say “good night,” he was fast asleep.
Vincent found Jim and
his brat having a half-hearted discussion about heating problems in old homes,
nothing as obvious as over-zealous gardeners digging up gas lines, but Damien
seemed to like to bitch and moan about things he knew little about.
“Jim, he’s sound
asleep, but I wouldn’t push him for any answers just yet. He’s dealing with a
lot of fears and self-recriminations right now. I don’t think he can even pinpoint exactly what’s gotten him so
upset. I think I need to sleep on
it.” Then looking at his own brat,
eager-eyed and no doubt glad that all attention was taken off him for a short
while, he narrowed his gaze.
“I need to think on
Damien’s punishment, too. Both our boys have been through a great deal today. I
think all of us could use a good night’s rest.” Damien smiled, glad for the reprieve. However, when Vin jerked
his thumb towards the door, Day ran like the fires of hell were lapping at his
heels.
Shaking his head at
the antics of his beloved, he smiled at Jim. “Don’t worry, I think I have a
good grasp on Blair’s problem and I think I know just the way to make him see
it more clearly.”
Extending an arm out
he put it around Jim’s shoulder and both men followed after Damien. The fair-haired young man was already
crawling beneath the blankets next to Blair.
Jim took his place on the outer side near Blair and Vincent eased his
tired frame down next to Damien, sandwiching the two younger men in for the
night.
It wasn’t long before
Vincent Cade could discern the even, restful sounds of three exhausted men at
peace. Only then, with a firm plan set in his mind, did he join his comrades in
the distant land of dreams.
The next morning,
Blair awoke to the tempting smells of coffee, sausages, scrambled eggs and
English Muffins. The cold house was
quite the deterrent for rising, but someone had rebuilt the fire in the hearth
and there were extra blankets wrapped around him. He also noted that a chair had been placed near the large hearth
and on it his jeans and a cable knit sweater were toasting just for him. Jim, he thought, you know how I hate the cold. Thanks, man.
“Good morning,
sleepyhead,” Jim said from behind him.
Rolling completely
over, not yet willing to abandon the nest, he saw Jim sitting on the sofa
hugging a hot mug of coffee, still steaming. He was dressed in jeans and a
thick, Irish-cable-knit sweater, the chilly English morning obviously even
piercing Ellison’s thick skin.
“Good morning,” he
yawned and stretched beneath the covers like a cat preparing himself for the
tortures of dressing in a cold room.
“Come on, Chief, it’s
not as bad as it looks. Once you have your clothes on, it’s actually quite warm
in here.”
“Morning, Blair!”
Day’s voice reached him from far behind Jim.
“Good morning,
Blair,” Vin’s deeply resonant voice followed.
Blair winced at Vin’s
voice, no doubt recalling the appropriately childish measures he needed to
employ last night to bring him under control.
Jim noted the
embarrassment. “Come on, Sandburg. It’s a new day.”
Vin took the cue.
Rising, he headed towards the hallway. “I think I’ll get a plate ready for
Blair. Make sure he has a nice hot cup of coffee ready for him, Day,” he called
over his shoulder as he left the room.
Damien immediately
took the pot from the electric coffee maker that they had set up in the living
room and eagerly took a cup over to his friend. Blair was sitting up, still
wrapped in the blankets.
“Here ya go, Blair,”
Day said cheerfully, obviously not the least bit perturbed over the threatened
punishment due him this morning.
“Thanks,” Blair said.
Instead of leaving,
Day sat down on the couch next to Jim.
He watched Blair sip
the hot liquid. “You know, Blair, it’s really okay.”
Blair put his cup
down on the quilts, holding it between both hands. He looked up questioningly
at his friend, then at Jim. Jim nodded his head in concurrence.
“I’m going to get it,
but I’m okay with it and you should be, too. I just want it to be over with. I
want to know I’ve been punished and I’m forgiven.”
Blair didn’t answer
for the longest time; instead he looked at Jim as though he held the answers.
Turning to Day, Jim
offered him the support he wanted from Blair. “You’ll be fine,” and he patted
his knee as he rose, deciding maybe Blair felt awkward in front of him, he
added, “I think I’ll help Vin in the kitchen, Chief. He might not be aware of
your terror of cholesterol.”
“Very funny, very
funny,” Blair said.
When they were alone,
Blair pushed the hair behind his ear, and decided to say what was on his mind.
“I guess I kind of made a fool of myself last night. I never realized how eagerly you can search your soul when you’re
over someone’s knee.”
“Vin really cares,
Blair, that’s why he pushes and forces the issues. He’s only trying to help you
and me and Jim. You have to learn not to fight it so much. Just be happy in your relationship with Jim
and you should even be happy that Vin cares enough to back you into a corner.
I’ve seen him just write people off he doesn’t feel are worth his efforts.”
“I know. I guess I
haven’t been the best houseguest in the world.”
“I’m having a great
time,” Damien said happily, apparently not upset in the least about what the
day held for him.
After breakfast, Jim
volunteered them for KP Duty. Collecting the trays and dishes, he and Blair
headed for the kitchen. Damien and Vincent remained in the living room, to
conduct the promised business of the day.
Once privacy was
insured, Vincent said in a matter of fact voice, “Go get it.”
Damien hesitated for
a brief moment, but a hard look from Vin sent him hurrying out of the living
room and up the stairs. Moments later
he returned with the paddle.
“Okay, little boy,
you know the why’s and the wherefores and the how comes. Do you have any
questions or anything you want to say on your behalf.” Vincent sat on the sofa, as he took the
paddle from Damien.
“I just loved it,
Vin. It was so beautiful and sentimental and I don’t even care if you paddle
me. I feel miserable over having lost it.”
“Well, little boy,
all you had to do was come to me and tell me. A simple little, ‘Vin, I’m sorry,
I snooped like I shouldn’t have and then I took a ring that I really had no
idea was going to be mine, I wore it and I lost it.’ Vincent looked at his very
miserable lover.
“You still would have
spanked me,” he mumbled.
“Oh, yes, indeed, but
not as severely as you are going to get it now.”
“I don’t care. I want
another one, Vin.”
“Whoa, hold on, you
do not dictate to me, little boy. I’ve told you that there are two things you
really have to break yourself of. One is the need to win all the time, the
other is your insatiable curiosity into things that do not concern you.”
“But this was my
ring, Vin. You were going to give it to me. I just wanted to wear it for a
little while. Show Mark that I wasn’t just a boy toy.”
“What?” Vincent
asked, unsure he heard his significant other correctly.
Day had the good
grace to look down at his shoes as he scuffed the threads on the large area rug
in front of the hearth. “A boy toy. That’s what he thinks I am. Just a
brainless boy toy. He’s always thought that. Just because his mom and I were
close.”
“I can’t deal with
that right now, Damien. I’m not even sure this is a legitimate complaint.
Knowing you, you are simply trying to confuse the issues and get leniency and
it is NOT going to work.”
Damien’s face dropped
in a short veil of anger and disappointment, confirming Vincent’s suspicions
that his little imp was once again trying to run rings around him.
“Drop them and over
my knee. NOW!” Vincent took on the voice of authority. It was the angry,
no-nonsense voice that Day knew better than to question or rebuke.
The blond hair fell
forward over his forehead as he unbuckled his belt, dropped his pants and two
stepped nearer to Vincent. The large man, losing patience, reached forward and
pulled the penitent across his lap.
Damien stiffened,
knowing the routine, but unable to relax. Fully aware of what he was in store
for he clenched his cheeks tightly and stiffened his spine.
The large man raised
the sweater above the slender waist.
Pulling the boxers down he saw the white globes tensing and dimpling as
the younger man prepared himself for the expected pain.
For a brief moment,
Vincent’s heart tightened. A deep and abiding love for this troublesome brat
overrode any and all frustrations at behavior that oftentimes had him clenching
his jaw in determined anger. Whatever
hollows echoed off this young man’s heart, whatever occupied the barren halls
of his past and made him chase after the prize of winning, the need for some
show of affection to wear like a badge of honor, were imbedded deeply into his
psyche. Time alone could not heal them, but Vincent was damn determined that he
be patient and never give up the effort to win that trust.
Raising his hand, he
delivered several sharp, stinging slaps to the soft, white flesh. Damien jerked
more in surprise at the hand spanking his bottom than the pain. Vincent always
started long, hard spankings with his hand. Warming up the flesh with his own
personal touch kept Damien constantly aware that Vin was there, not some
executioner who cared not a whit for the boy.
Groaning at the
promise of the severity this punishment would take, Damien tried to throw some
stones of reason into the pond, perhaps to veer the tide of anger in another
direction. “Mark saw me digging. You
know, Mark could have helped me look. He could have helped and put the grass
back.”
“I’m well aware of
the stories you told Mark Coletrane, little boy. You wasted the man’s time,
sent him off with lies about me being here.
Well, you are going to apologize to Mark. You are going to pay for lawn
care for the rest of the month so Mark won’t lose his income; but Mark is not
going to be doing our lawn work, Damien, you are.
“NO!” Day had the
audacity to yell.
The spanking
intensified, the flesh bounced and reddened as an angry Vincent reminded his
young partner of who was in charge. “Ugh, No, Please, Vin. Please. It hurts.”
“Hurts? I’m just
getting started, Day. Surely even you know that.”
Damien pressed his
face into the cushions, praying that Jim and Blair could not hear him. When Vincent gauged the flesh hot and
stinging, he rested his hand on the small of Day’s back, allowing him to
compose himself before the final chapter of his spanking began.
“Any thoughts you’d
like to share at this moment, Mr. St. Claire?” Vincent wanted to pull the brat
back out. Concern for the crying figure over his lap compelled him not only to
rub small circles in the back, but to bring out the feisty youth who challenged
and amused him most times.
“Only that life sucks
big time,” Day mumbled as though he were the philosopher for all ages.
Letting out a
signature Vincent Cade laugh, he recognized the returning truculence and
spirit. Picking up the paddle he turned his attentions on the final lessons to
be learned.
Blair and Jim were
trying to keep their conversation light. Still not willing to voice any
concerns to Jim, Blair talked about England, the Salisbury Cathedral and
Stonehenge as he grabbed a plate Jim handed to him. Wiping the dish, he winced
every time a cry or sounds of the paddle reached them from across the huge
house.
Jim’s own hearing was
turned down, blocking out the painful sounds that often accompanied the
resounding smacks. His concerns for the victim were long shelved after hearing
the soft comforting sounds Vincent made every so often or the warm advice
tendered to the young man receiving all of Vin’s attention.
Even in anger,
Vincent Cade demonstrated a warm caring for Damien St. Claire.
“Gentlemen,” the
voice broke through their strained conversation, the intercom connecting them
to the two men across the house. “Would you please join us in the living room.”
Blair looked
questioningly at Jim. Grabbing the towel from Sandburg, Jim wiped his hands and
put a guiding hand on Blair’s shoulder. “Let’s go, Chief.”
Upon entering the
huge room, Blair eagerly sought out his friend. Damien was crying miserably,
face pressed into a corner, his pants were pulled up, but askew, his sweater
still high above his waist. His hands
clenched at his side, frantically wanting to rub at his bottom.
“Damien has something
to say to you, and especially to you, Blair,” Vincent announced, though it was
said more as a command than a documentary comment.
The figure turned
from the corner half ways. Lifting his tear-stained face, he looked at Jim and
then at Blair. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, Jim for ruining your vacation and for
causing you concern about Blair’s safety. Thank you for saving me.” Then
casting a quick glance at Vincent, who stood with one hand supporting his frame
against the hearth, he continued, “Blair, I’m sorry for ruining your vacation,
for getting you into trouble and almost killing you. I’m not a very good
friend.”
Damien then started
to unleash fresh tears that coursed down his cheeks in a strong and steady
flow. Blair rushed forward and put a
hand on Day’s back as he turned back into the corner.
“Is this necessary?”
Blair asked harshly. “I mean, he’s sorry and he’s been punished, what more do
you want from him?”
“Blair!” Jim
intervened, but Vincent raised a hand.
“Blair, Day is well
aware of the routine when he steps out of line. He’s due a day of punishment.
He stands in the corner for one hour. Then he will go outdoors and try to make
amends to the natural world for his harsh treatment of her. After lunch, he
will be in the corner again for some quiet moments of reflection. Back outdoors
and then corner time again before dinner. He will eat by himself as children
are often made to do and while we dine he shall stand in the corner, quietly
repentant. Afterwards he will receive a bedtime spanking and be tucked away by
eight thirty.”
Blair paled, “You
can’t be serious.”
“Day, am I serious?”
Vin asked, quite pleasantly.
“Yeah, he’s serious.”
Blair’s jaw tightened
at the perceived mistreatment of his friend. Noting the slight shake of Jim’s
head, he raged out of the room, not sure how long he could contain a sharp and
bitter tongue.
“Damien, do I abuse
you?” Vincent called out, making direct eye contact with Ellison, noting the
blue eyes hardening into him, demanding an explanation.
“No. You just put me
back on track. Take the steam out of my engines,” Day let out a little
laugh. Then rubbing his butt, he lost
some of his humor, “but you paddled awfully hard today.”
“You almost got
yourself killed and you almost took your friend with you. I think it was
deserved attention.”
“I know,” Day sounded
genuinely sorry. “I really am sorry, Vin, Jim.”
“No more talking.
Quiet reflection is what you need now, little boy.” Vincent put his arm around
Jim and walked him over to the small tables by the window. Looking out onto the driveway, they could
see Blair walking towards the trees, no sense of direction, lost in thought.
“I think I might lose
him over this,” Ellison said, sadly. “He needs the discipline, but seeing
this,” he waved a hand that was meant to pull in the quiet blond in the corner,
“he’s scared and confused.”
“Tomorrow I think
he’ll see things a little more clearly. Why don’t you take him into town today.
Lunch at the tavern, some gift shopping for friends. Day won’t feel like
civilized company anyway. He tends to get pouty and sometimes quite petulant on
a punishment day and I’ll need to tend to him immediately. Dinner will be
around seven. I’ll send out for pizza. It’s Day’s favorite. The least I can do
for him.”
Jim Ellison smiled.
There was no doubt in his mind that Vincent Cade, hard ass ex-Lt. Colonel loved
the golden-haired youth. For all of Day’s wild ways, his irritatingly childish attitude
towards life, there was one man who loved him with all his heart and soul.
Why was it so simple for him to see,
yet so difficult for Blair to piece together the puzzle that relationships
often were.
“I guess you’re
right. He’ll only get upset seeing Day punished when he feels just as
responsible.”
Vincent placed a hand
on Jim’s arm. “He’ll come around. He’s afraid he’s changed. We need to show
him, if he’s changed at all, it’s only for the better and it’s not diminished
him in any way. I know just how to do it.
Plus, he has no closure. He feels just as responsible as Day and he
won't be happy until he’s paid his dues.”
“I can’t really
punish him when he’s so put off by it. I know we have the agreement for six
months and we have another month, but he was only helping Day.” Ellison sighed, then
the blue eyes
returned to the window watching with loving concern the troubled young man with
the gentle heart.
Jim and Blair spent a
pleasant day in town. The shops were busy, but they took their time studying
small items, judging the value of certain purchases, filling spaces in the loft
with treasured memories of this trip and their time in England. A pleasant lunch in a more tourist-catered
restaurant and more shopping for Simon and Darryl filled their afternoon. Blair
insisted on buying a wind chime that danced with different colored cats each in
a different position of springing or running. Jim cautioned him that Vin might
find the noise of chimes irritating, but that sealed Blair’s determination all
the more and he decided to drop it. In
turn, Jim picked up a black onyx paperweight for Vincent’s office. It was a
natural stone, roughly cut, jagged in parts, but smooth and shiny in others.
The Demon’s day was
not so enjoyable. Close contact with the earth was not something Damien St.
Claire enjoyed at any time. He felt death alone should deliver him into a close
enough relationship with the earth and until that time, he liked to view it’s
wonders from afar. This thought often sent Vincent into long periods of
reflection on a man who was introduced to him while fighting for environmental
protection. There was no accounting for the colors that painted St. Claire’s
world, but colorful as it was, it was shadowed and tinted in areas that
sometimes made the colors run and fade. In the eight years he knew the young
man, he was still seeing patterns in his prism.
A slight altercation
at lunchtime when the truculent prisoner decided corner time was not for
reflection, but better suited to bitching and griping. A quick turn over and a
well-placed hand soon had him eagerly seeking the solitude and relative safety
of the quiet corner. Damien knew the
day would continue as Vin had decreed no matter how much he complained, but the
persistent little demon in his head popped its ugly head up enough to bring
added discomfort to the sorrowful young man.
When Jim and Blair
returned to the house it was five o’clock. Both men were exhausted from the
pleasant but tiring day of gift purchasing for friends. From the huge foyer,
they could see out in back upon the lawns.
They spotted Vincent Cade, hands clasped behind his back chuckling,
standing under the staircase watching the toiler in the fields.
Blair could see
Damien St. Claire, dressed in jeans and ripped sweatshirt, golden hair blowing
in the wind pounding a shovel flat against the grass. The furious expression on
his face, the vindictive exuberance of every blow, did indeed look comical. Jim
pulled Blair close as they walked up to Cade.
“He’s taking that
well, I can see,” Jim said in a mildly conversational tone.
Vincent let out a
loud laugh that was trademark Cade. “Day takes everything with charm and good
grace….” Casting his hand toward the window for effect, “as you can see.”
All three men
laughed. Even Blair shook his head at the determined petulance of his friend.
“Did you gentlemen
have a good day?” Vin asked smiling at the way Jim and Blair leaned into each
other.
Jim winked, “Great,
we have some gifts for you and Day, but I think they’ll be well-received on
another day. Right now, I think we’re
due a nap. When is dinner?”
“Seven thirty,” Vin
said, then looking at Blair he added, “Day has corner time and a bedtime
spanking due him, then an early night.
He’ll be a free agent after that so I imagine, Blair, he’ll be in need
of a fun day tomorrow.”
“I imagine he will,”
Blair said, with just a note of sarcasm in his voice.
“See, Blair, Day will
feel fine tomorrow. He’s vindicated himself and he knows I love him enough to
call him on his conduct. He pays the dues, then he’s allowed the joy of a clear
conscience.”
Blair looked
nervously at Jim. Pulling his lover by the arm, he commented from a distance,
“We’re actually quite tired. I think that nap sounds good.”
Vin merely smiled
recalling how Blair could manipulate situations to his advantage.
“I’ll see you at
seven-thirty,” he added, totally fine with the escape.
The pizza was
delicious. England didn’t separate itself from this American pleasure by
much. Day was positioned in the corner
near the blazing hearth, nose pressed firmly into the narrow area. He had
showered and now dressed in his pajamas, he was ready for bed, like any brat
after a spanking.
Vin had stood by as
he showered and dressed for bed. Exiting the shower stall, he threw his towel
down in a pique, tired of being denied the pleasant company of his houseguests.
“Pick it up and hang
it to dry,” Vincent said as he sat on the closed toilet seat.
Day stood there
naked, arms folded across his chest, taking his stand.
“One, two, three,”
Vin said quickly, never allowing Day warnings on Punishment days, he pushed the
brat over the sink, grabbed the large wooden bath brush and applied a series of
hard swats to the now pink and rosy globes. Day kicked and tried to push up,
but Vincent held him firmly by his neck.
When released, he
angrily picked the soppy towel up and threw it over the shower door. Vincent
relented and allowed the temper tantrum as he neatly straightened it and
followed his brat into the cold bedroom.
Vincent had laid out
the Dr. Denton pajamas that he had bought for Day last Christmas. Day loved the
cozy and warm pj’s, but embarrassed with Jim and Blair sleeping next to them,
he froze in his tracks.
Anger still visible
in his demeanor, he picked up the pajamas and threw them into Vin’s face.
Needless-to-say, his bottom was once again attended to, his outcries only
exacerbated his kicking and screaming. Vincent sat the brat on his lap. A
moment of staring each other down, and Day dropped his hazel orbs. Vin picked
up the Dentons and dressed his brat. Putting his feet into them, he pushed him
off his lap and raised the bottoms up over the reddened flesh. Day winced, but
didn’t struggle, didn’t cooperate either as he stood stock still, but he knew
better than to put up a fight.
Now standing in the
corner, remembering his own lonely meal in silence. The tasty pizza, reminding
him of days of camaraderie with his earth buddies over a beer, only boiled the
resentment all the more.
His eyes remained
tightly closed as he listened to the pleasant chatter going on in back of him.
Vincent was eagerly questioning Jim and Blair about their day in
Salisbury. A small shop noted here, and
Day wanted to jump in and add his comments about his experience there. A
pleasant memory chalked by Jim’s remembrances, and Day had to bite his tongue
to keep from adding more substance to the experience. Finally kicking his feet
angrily into the wall, he brought attention upon himself, unfortunately, not
the kind he wanted.
“Do you want some
attention over there, little boy? I can assure you, it won’t be the kind you
are thinking of.” Vincent quickly brought a finger up to his lips, to keep Jim
and Blair from objecting on the penitent’s behalf.
No answer, a low
groan and some mumbled words of expression. Jim’s hearing allowed him to catch
“controlling bastard,” but he hid the smile that threatened to break across his
features. Vincent caught the save and merely shook his head, knowing full well
the image Damien had of him right about now.
“Do you?” he repeated
the question.
“No, Vin, I don’t
want your da…your attention.”
“Good, because I can
assure you, Demon, you will regret it long into tomorrow.”
“I regret it
already,” Day persisted, having to have the final say.
“ENOUGH!” Vincent
took back control.
“Not by a long shot,”
Day had enough himself. He turned from the corner, stomping his encased feet
like a brat beyond control. “It’s not fair, Vin. It’s fucking not fair. Fuck
you!”
Vincent rose swiftly.
Placing a large hand on the back of Day’s neck he guided him forcefully out
into the hallway towards the bathroom, placing sharp smacks to his bottom as he
urged him along. “NO!” Day wailed, well aware of this procedure, “please, Vin,
I just had pizza, don’t ruin it.”
“You ruined it
yourself, little boy.”
Vin sat the
disgruntled captive on the toilet seat and closed the bathroom door. Opening
the small cupboard under the sink he took out a paper-wrapped object. It looked
like a Popsicle or sucker, but Day starting whining immediately; still hoping against
all hope that Vin had only taken him into the small room for a spanking.
“Vin, please. I won’t
say another word, I promise.”
“I know you won’t,
little boy,” Vin ran water on the object which was approximately three inches
long and one and half thick inches thick. “Open,” Vin directed as he glared
down at the petulant mouth.
“FU!!!”
Vin shoved the
foul-tasting Backtalker into the smart mouth.
Day’s face twisted
into a contortionist expression of anger, resentment, distaste and acquiescence
in a matter of seconds. The hard look on Cade’s face promised a really bad
evening if any more antics were displayed. St. Claire of the quick mind chose
surrender.
When Damien was
ushered back into the living room, a sucker protruded from his closed mouth.
However, upon closer inspection the foaming soap that bubbled at the edges of
his mouth and the sour expression on his face were evidence enough that it was
soap in his mouth, no child’s sweet treat.
One final hard smack
to his bottom, a groan from Damien, and the blond was once again cornered for
reflection and some savoring of the moment.
Vince joined Jim and
Blair at the table again. “Backtalkers,” he said, by way of explanation.
“Excuse me,” Blair
asked, bristling.
“Backtalkers---it’s
soap. Actually made in Phoenix. Soap on a stick with a particularly foul taste
for brats who can’t control their tongues. I’m afraid we buy them by the case
lately.”
Jim and Vin resumed
their conversation while Blair’s mind went off down avenues that crossed at
every juncture.
After the meal was
over, Vincent excused himself from the table in the living room and grabbed
Damien’s shoulders. Damien rushed past
him and water could be heard running in the bathroom as he rinsed and spit and
coughed up the foul-tasting soap. Vincent met him at the entrance to the living
room and marched the dejected figure over into his office and closed the door.
The loud cries coming
from Vin’s office were punctuated by a wince on Blair’s face. Each harsh stroke
against the bare flesh, resounding in sharp slapping rhythms, followed by an
equally forceful wail, left the young anthropologist wringing his hands.
“Sit down, Blair,”
Jim finally said, as he pulled his passing lover from the path he had worn on
the large area rug. “He’s fine. It’s almost over with, the whole day. Damien
knows what he can expect when he misbehaves. It’s all part of the routine. He
finds safety and assurance in that fact.”
“Meaning I don’t,”
Blair answered sharply, trying to pull off of Ellison’s lap. A large hand
landed a reminder to his own rump. Blair groaned, but settled in easily and
looked up with a pout at his own lover’s angry face.
“It means, Chief,
that we can work on our problems, but it doesn’t mean you can work on Day’s and
Vin’s. Do I make myself clear?” Gone was the Ellison who was trying to cut him
some slack, give him that inch or two of leeway to concede his own needs and
desires for the relationship. Now James Ellison was in fact stating where the
line ended. Blair bit his lip unconsciously and nodded his understanding.
Vincent’s hand
relentlessly met the target area with a force that hopefully instilled a long
remembrance into the brat he loved.
Feeling a sense of relief himself that the long-tortuous day was almost
over, he allowed his only feelings of irritability to make their statement. The
brat deserved this treatment and he would see he collected all his points. A
final hard swat on each reddened cushion sent a long howl into the air. The
figure deflated and lay motionless across his knee.
Pulling the warm
pajama flaps up and over the hot flesh, he started making small circles on his
back, soft reassurances to the distraught young man. When Day quieted enough, Vin pulled him up and onto his lap as the
leather sofa in his office cracked and snapped with the movement.
“I’m sorry, Vin. I’m
so sorry. Do you love me? Do you still love me?” Damien was a little boy again,
a lost soul unsure of his place in the scheme of things.
“Oh, little boy, I
will always love you. I don’t like your actions, there are times I don’t like
you, but I always---always Demon---love you.”
Day broke down even
more; as though once the damn was broken the major flood now pushed down all
defenses and was determined now to drown out all false pretenses. The tired,
bedraggled figure clung to Cade with a childlike intensity, the fingers
grasping his shirt in large clumps, the legs pulled up tightly, knees into his
chest, curling himself into a ball hoping to fit into this man’s pocket.
Cade rapidly rained
kisses on the top of his head; brushing the wild locks away from his forehead
he marked every area with the reassurances of love.
“I love you. I love
you so much, Vin. Don’t ever stop loving me. Pleeeeaaase!” he wailed out the
last.
“I should spank you
again for that, little boy,” Vin said harshly as he pushed the sniffling brat
from his chest. But the hazel eyes looked so sincere so disbelieving that Vin
merely grabbed the face with both hands and planted a hot, possessive kiss on
the quivering lips.
The young man, in
total denial, found faith and assurance in that one hard kiss. As he pushed the
face back the hazel eyes looked droopily up into his own brown ones.
Laughing, Vincent
lifted the small figure to his chest and raised himself from the sofa. “It’s bed
time for you, brat. You’re not of sound mind right now. No court could convict
you of any transgressions the state you’re in.”
Day’s head fell onto
his chest and he cuddled into the warm hammock the arms made.
Vincent carried the
semi-sleeping form to the fireplace and laid him gently into the nest of
blankets. Kneeling down he smiled
benevolently as he tucked the feet and hands beneath the blanket and captured
his prize with one final good night kiss. The day was over and the healing
would begin.
Returning to join
Blair and Jim at the table, Vincent sighed heavily. “I think he sometimes
enjoys punishment day, because he knows I suffer right along with him.”
Jim gave a quick
glance at Blair. Smiling he noted the confused look on his young friend’s face.
“He’s right, Chief, in these relationships there’s a great deal of
sharing...some I don’t think you’ve even begun to imagine.”
Blair nodded, trying
desperately to deal with his confused emotions. The trouble with enlightenment
is that it comes from out of the blue and it’s never what you expect it to be.
Lying down in the
nest of blankets, Vin tugged the sleeping form of his partner closer to
him. Day opened his eyes at the
movement, “Shhh, go back to sleep
little boy. It’s late,” Vin said in a
whisper, not wanting to wake up Jim and Blair.
“Are Jim and Blair
asleep?” Day whispered back.
Raising his head a
little to look over Day, he saw the two other figures. Blair was asleep on his stomach facing
Jim---his hand inches away from grabbing hold of the other man’s T-shirt but
still not able to cross that line. Jim
was on his side, facing Blair fast asleep.
“Yes, as you should be.”
“I can’t.”
Vin sighed, he was
tired and as much as he loved his partner, he really didn’t feel like talking
tonight. It had been a long day and he
was physically and emotionally spent.
“Why not little boy?” Vin asked,
his voice carrying the edge of impatience.
“My butt is too
sore.”
Vin shook his head,
“Damien, I did not spank you that hard.
Roll over on your stomach and you’ll be fine.”
“It hurts,” Day said
pitifully.
“It’s going to hurt a
lot worse if you don’t roll over and go to sleep. I mean it, young man.”
Day sniffled spicing
the show with self-pity.
“One more sound out
of you and you can spend another day on punishment duty.”
“Okay,” came a small
voice.
Just about to drift
off to sleep, the figure next to him squirmed out of his grasp and sat up.
“What the hell are you doing now?” he
whispered, completely annoyed now.
“I have to go to the
bathroom,” the indignant voice answered, “it’s either that or I can pee right
here.”
Vin sighed wearily;
it was going to be a long night. “Come
right back, I do not want you up roaming around in the cold.”
Vin reached out a
hand to help steady his partner, easing him up among the blankets and pillows
scattered about. He watched as Day made his way to the bathroom, fully aware of
the reason for the small act of defiance under the pretense of nature’s call.
After spending all day by himself, his brat was in need of attention and
reassurance that all was forgiven and he was as loved and cherished as
ever. Getting up quietly, Vin stole
into his office just off the living room, returning a minute later with a small
tube and a towel. Getting back between
the blankets, he waited for Day’s return.
A few minutes later, the bathroom light shut off and he could hear the
soft sounds of his lover returning to the nest.
Day quietly slipped
back in front of his lover, once again sandwiching himself between Vin and
Blair. However the extra cushions positioned between the two younger men kept
them from touching. This precaution had been necessary when both brats had
started fighting on the first night.
“Are you all settled
for the night?” Vin asked in his ear.
Day nodded.
“Good,” Vin said, as
he began to tug down Day’s pajama flaps.
Day wiggled away,
“No, Vin, I’m sorry. I’ll be
quiet. I promise.”
“Damien, hush,
relax.”
Day’s squirming had
helped the movement and he was now bare in the back.
Pulling Day close so
that he was lying almost spooned directly in front of him, Vin gently stroked
the now bare butt.
The younger man
groaned softly, arching his back, opening himself up to the exploring fingers.
“Demon, be quiet,”
Vin ordered softly, stopping his fingers just before they dipped into the
opening clef.
Day nodded and bit
down on his lip as the fingers began to move again. Reaching down and unbutton some of his front buttons, he started
stroking his own cock in rhythm with the other fingers in back.
Vin smiled at the
soft sounds his lover was making and the slight movements under the
covers. Removing his hand, he quickly
opened the lube and spread it on his own hard cock.
A soft whimper
escaped Day’s lips at the absence of his lover’s touch.
Not saying a word,
Vin positioned himself behind the younger man, the tip of his penis barely
touching his lover’s opening.
Wiggling back
slightly, Day was halted by Vin’s hand on his waist. “Noooooo,” he said, frustrated by the lack of movement afforded
him, his hand stilling in order to prolong his excitement.
“Little boy,
hush. Don’t make another noise or I’ll
put a ring on you, shove a plug up your ass and let you stay hard all night.”
Day could not control
the small laugh, “Oooohhh,’ he said, “I like it when you get all rough and
kinky with me.”
Vin leaned in to
whisper in his love’s ear, “You are just going to have to be patient, little
boy, this is going to be quiet. We are
not putting on a show for everyone.
Think you can do that?”
Day nodded his head,
“What do I get as my reward for staying quiet?” He whispered innocently.
“This,” Vin said,
shoving himself deep into his lover.
Already relaxed,
Day’s body allowed the large, hard member to slide home with little
resistance. His breath caught for a
minute, no matter how many times they did this, it still took several moments
for the feeling of tight pressure and fullness to be replaced by the glorious
feelings of being entered and made a part of his lover. He tightened his muscles to indicate to Vin
that he was okay.
Vin slowly began to
rock ever so slightly inside of him, moving his hips just inches but enough to
send waves of pleasure coursing through both of their bodies.
Day reached back with
one hand and gripped Vin’s hip as if to help with the movement, his other hand
rapidly bringing about his own climax.
His internal muscles tightened and his hand turned talon as it hooked
into Vin’s hip as he came hard.
Vin could feel the
slight tremors course through the younger man’s body. With three harder thrusts---each one impaling him on his
lover---he came hard. Letting out a
quiet moan, he felt himself pumping into Day and the returning acceptance and
reward of their union.
The sensation of
drifting held both men for several moments, complimenting their lovemaking with
a sense of peace.
Day could feel Vin
starting to get soft and pull out of him,
"No," he said, "stay with me."
"Sorry, little
boy, not in this position, I can't. My
arm is asleep already." Vin said, regretfully.
Day rolled over so
that he was now facing Vin and forcing his legs in-between the larger man’s, he
curled up close. Sighing contentedly as Vin’s warm breath brushed the top of
his head, strong arms securing him in place, he came home.
"I'm sorry I was
such a brat today," Day whispered.
"I know. It's over."
"I love
you," Day said, "Those words don't even begin to express how I feel
about you. They're inadequate to tell
you just how much."
"I know. Now, go
to sleep, little boy, you've had a rough day.
I love you, too."
Within moments the
contented drifter settled into sleep and his older lover joined him in tandem,
closely entwined in the afterglow.
Blair Sandburg eased
his breath out in careful silence. Confusion heightened his already distraught
state. His friend, lorded over and strictly held in line, was complacently
accepting in his chains. So much so, that he seemed genuinely contented with
the way things were. Tonight, for all the punishment endured by his blond
friend, Blair Sandburg was the one most upset. The young anthropologist
snuggled beneath his blankets, guilty and upset, wishing for all the world that
it was he who had been punished and forgiven.
Sunday came into
their world with a golden halo, warm and promising. Damien dressed quickly and
with very little cajoling convinced Blair to join him for services at the
Cathedral. Amazed at the good cheer and enthusiasm with which his friend met
the day---following the emotional storm he weathered just the previous
day---Blair wanted to please Damien---be there for him.
The Gas Company
workers were arriving just as they were getting ready to go so Vin and Jim
stayed behind in case there was trouble. Day glanced guilty at the arriving
truck as they left the house. Shaking
his head, he muttered to himself, "No, don’t go there, it's over."
"What did you
say?" Blair asked, not having caught the softly mumbled words.
"Oh, I was just
telling myself not to get all guilty about the pipe. It's over, it's being fix and Vin has forgiven me. When I get caught up in my guilt about
something, I get really bratty until Vin catches me and sets me back
upright." He glanced at Blair,
"so, what's going on with you and Jimbo?
You off the hook for the gardens?"
"I don't
know. I need to think about what I want
and make some choices I guess, tell him what I want," Blair replied
quietly.
The other man made a
face and said, "Glad I don't have to do that. It's hard to ask to be punished.
I've only gotten my nerve up a couple of times."
They pulled in the already
crowded parking area for the Cathedral and got out and began to walk in. Suddenly Day stopped and laid a hand on
Blair's arm, "Just remember my friend, what you want and what you need is
not always the same thing." With
that, he started off quickly into the church.
They emerged an hour
later, neither one really talking. Day
reflecting on the sermon and still struggling with his feelings about organized
religion. Blair struggling with his own
feelings about Jim and their relationship and how to get out of the mess he
seemed to have created.
Day seem to shake his
contemplative mood by the time they reached the house fifteen minutes later,
bursting into the kitchen with a loud "We're home!”
Vin looked up from
the frying pan full of bacon and glared at him briefly, then turning to Jim he
said in a mock upset voice, “I thought I told you to change the locks while
they were gone!"
Jim laughed. Day stuck out his tongue and crossed his
eyes at his lover, who unfortunately for him turned around in time to catch
him.
"Didn't your
mother ever tell you not to do that or your face could freeze that way, little
boy?" Vin asked, waggling a finger in the classic no-no gesture.
Day broke into a huge
grin and fell into his lover, burrowing his face deep into his chest, "But
you would still love me, right?" he asked, completely sure of the answer.
He was rewarded with
a kiss on his hair and a gentle, loving, "Of course, little boy,
always."
"Where is your
partner in crime, Day?" Jim asked, encompassing the grounds with his
hearing trying to locate his guide.
"I don't know,
he said he would be in shortly,” Day said, snuggling up to Vin and totally
unconcerned with the outside world.
"I'll go see if
I can't find him before breakfast gets too cold." Jim slipped quietly out
of the kitchen, giving his hosts a few minutes of privacy.
After breakfast,
since gas and heat would be returning to the house before the morning was out,
it was decided to clean the living room up and return it to its normal neatness. Throughout the cleaning, Damien practically
hung on Vin. Several times Jim caught
Blair’s attention with a wink and the young man would turn to see Day, arms
wrapped around Vin’s waist from behind, head resting on his back practically
being pulled along as Vincent tucked cushions back on chairs and folded
blankets.
Then a resounding
swat to the brat’s backside and Day would---with grudgingly good cheer---resume
his own ministrations on the labor force. It was as if the young man could not
get enough of his hard, unyielding lover.
When they were
finished, they walked out onto the terrace for a bit of fresh air. “What are we doing today?” Blair said as he
looked out at the beautiful grounds, the green lawns crisp in the September sun
as it burnt off the last layers of English mist.
“You guys are on your
own until Noon,” Vin said.
“Oh..I know just the
thing,” Day said, excitement coloring his eyes a light green. “There’s this rocky crag off about two miles
along the river, the view is spectacular.
Remember that painting in The Art Critic, the one with the mist
blanketing the river, this is the landscape Vin painted. It’s quite
breathtaking and there should be just enough mist left when we get there to
duplicate the painting.”
“Great,” Blair said,
“I’ll get my camera. Jim, you up for a hike?”
Jim looked to Vin for
an indication of any planned discussions between them, but Vin merely shrugged
his shoulders.
“No, Chief, count me
out on this one. I think I need a quiet Sunday morning with a cup of coffee,
the newspaper, and I might give Simon a call and find out how things are going
back in Cascade. You go ahead and have some fun. Besides, I’ve seen the place
before.”
With that and little
else by way of encouragement, both young men headed out into the slowly warming
countryside.
Jim hugged his cup
and waited for Vin to put his paper down. The older man tried to read, but
several times he scrunched his face in irritation, aware that his friend across
the small breakfast table was anxious to talk.
Finally, sighing
heavily, he folded the paper and laid in dramatically down on the table, “Okay,
Jimmy, what is it?”
Laughing at the
obviousness of his concerns, he shook his head, “I guess fooling you is just
about impossible.”
“I’ve dealt with more
than my share of brats and I’ve come to know the looks of guilt and
uncertainty. I’d say yours is more uncertainty now…the need for reassurance.
Spit it out.”
“I’m just not sure
where to go with Blair right now? I’m about ready to call the whole discipline
relationship off. It’s just too hard on him and me, emotionally.” Ellison took a long swig of his coffee and
put the cup down. Rising slowly he walked to the window that overlooked the
driveway, and watched the Gas Company's truck slowly pull away from the house
and back onto the main road, their work finished.
“Jim, the
relationship would be working just fine if you had stuck to the promise you
made the young man. You’ve been vacillating this whole time, so much so that
Blair is confused; he’s not sure any more where he stands. You should have
paddled him Saturday morning when Day got his punishment. You screw up, you get
punished…right away, no time to think about it, no room for discussion, simple
cause and effect. Now he’s pulled away and you need the whole courtship dance
again, like a trial lawyer presenting your case and convincing your jury. Well,
the way I see it, when Blair agreed to six months, he was sentenced and he
should have served his time. The only negotiations allowed will be in one
month’s time when the contract gets renewed or not.”
“Well, it’s not going
to be easy convincing him of anything after he witnessed Day’s punishment. I’ll
never get him to recommit now and I just can’t bring myself to spank him when
he’s so torn by the whole relationship.”
Ellison came back to the table and sat down.
"Jim, he wants
to be in this relationship with you.
He's hurting right now, he is confused and unsure of himself and what's
going on. You need to take him in hand,
make him live with the relationship like you agreed. You have one month left to show him the joys and peace of being
in a relationship like this, be strict, be demanding and he will respond. Have you done that or have you been fooling
around the whole five months?"
"No, this
summer, I really had him on a short leash.
He has a tendency to run himself ragged so I made him keep a time
sheet. He was not allowed to work more
then 45 hours a week. If he was putting
in long hours at school, that meant he spent less time with me at the station
and vice versa. When his 45 hours were
reached, unless it was a special situation, the books got closed and the
computer was shut off."
"And how did he
respond to that?"
"It was hard the
first week but he settled down and things went smoothly. He got everything done on time, he was able
to work with me, but it was at a normal pace.
There was very little stress and he seemed happy…” Jim's voice trailed off.
"What?"
"He told me he
was happy because he knew where the stop sign was and didn’t have to look for
it and he knew he was going to find it and there was nothing he could do about
it."
Vin smiled,
"Exactly. That is what he needs;
you know and he knows it. He needs
someone to put boundaries on his behavior, on his actions, so he can enjoy all that
he has accomplished instead of focusing on what hasn't been accomplished."
They sat in silence
for several minutes, Jim, thinking about the summer and his actions now, Vin,
simply watching and waiting.
“You said something
Friday night about knowing how to fix this problem, what did you mean? I think I need some help with him,” Jim said
softly.
“So, James Ellison is
not afraid to ask for help when he needs it,” Vin laughed, his voice kind and
nonjudgmental, “seems the sessions over my knee worked just fine.”
The detective shook
his head, laughing, remembering all the times that Vincent Cade had made him
see himself, understand himself, and pour out his deepest thoughts most times
looking at the floor or carpeting with his butt blazing sore and hot.
“No, I’m not afraid
to come to you and ask your help. You’ve always been there and you always make
it right.”
It was the larger
man’s turn to laugh and Ellison smiled at the wonderful sound. The strong, deep
resonations of his good cheer when something struck him funny was an indication
of the man’s love for life and friends and family. Cade never did anything insincerely or halfway.
“You’ve met Peter Bailey before, your last trip here four years ago.”
Ellison nodded his head remembering the quiet, unassuming young doctor.
“Well, you might not
know it, but Mark Coletrane, our gardener, is Peter’s partner.”
“Coletrane? When you
mentioned him before I’d wondered where I’d heard that name before,” Jim said,
rubbing his jaw trying to piece together the puzzle.
“The inimitable Mrs.
Coletrane, no doubt comes to mind.” Cade let out another belly laugh as he
watched his friend’s face open in amazement.
“NO?” Jim said
shocked, “not his mother?”
“Yes, indeed,” Cade
laughed harder. “Damien’s own fairy godmother, the one and only Mrs. Agnes
Coletrane, storm trooper, nursemaid and disciplinarian in her own right. That
woman was an angel. There were times when I first brought Damien here that I
swear, Jim, I would have killed the brat if it weren’t for that woman’s
intercession.” Vincent paused and frowned at some sad memory, “I think there
were times when she came pert near to killing him herself, but he ate out of
her hand like the wild birds and squirrels I saw her tame.”
“I’m sorry, Vin,” Jim
said, realizing how much his friend missed the strong, forceful woman in his
life.
“I think Day started
thinking of her as a mother and he took her death pretty hard. Hell, I took it
hard.”
Then as though
realizing how far off track the train of thought had gone, Vincent cleared his
throat, pushing back his emotions, “Peter and Mark are coming here for a
barbecue this afternoon. I called Peter and he was kind enough to pick up some
great steaks before he left London from this shop where I have an account. I
think your brat is about to be in for a little self-realization.”
The self-realization
began at first meeting, although Blair Sandburg had no idea. Peter Bailey
caught his attention immediately when the pair arrived at Noon. They were a
marvelous contrast in personalities and physique. Although both men were well
built and proportioned nicely, Peter was slightly taller, but slimmer in frame
and, although six-years-older than Mark, at thirty-six he took the back seat
initially, quietly sitting back and watching. It was obvious the two men were
deeply in love. Mark continuously pulled the quiet man to him, hugging him over
the smallest pretense.
Peter Bailey had long
brown hair that covered his ears. The brown eyes that looked out from behind
the round, wire-framed glasses were always alert and questioning as though he
were afraid he might miss something if he rested them for a while. His mouth
most times set in a small smile, as though not quite sure to be in awe or
simply laughing at the idiosyncrasies of the world around him.
The striking contrast
of his partner made Peter seem at times frail, although there was nothing
fragile in his nature or his demeanor. It was all illusion when foiled by
Coletrane’s bronzed skin, sun-tinged brown hair and hazel eyes. This man literally
glowed with good health and stamina and Bailey looked washed out at times and
mousy.
To the casual
observer, these differences made Peter seem at times meek and compliant,
although in reality, there was nothing weak in his nature or his demeanor. It
was all illusion he seemed to have no problem with.
The lesson began
immediately.
As Bailey and
Coletrane entered the living room, Blair and Jim both rose to greet the new
guests. Vincent walked them in, an arm on each shoulder, one on each side of
him. Damien had run the steaks into the kitchen and was getting beers for the
guests.
“Jim Ellison, Blair
Sandburg, I would like you to meet two very good friends of ours, Mark
Coletrane and Peter Bailey.”
Both Jim and Blair
shook hands with the two men.
“Blair,” Peter said,
the first conversation he jumped into since their arrival fifteen minutes
earlier, “I hear you’re an anthropologist. I can’t tell you how much I’ve heard
about you from Vincent and Day. As a matter of fact, I’ve already read a few of
your journal publications. Quite the presenter of facts and theories, you
changed my views almost completely about the physiological adaptability of
nomadic peoples. Although some of your theories on the lack of social classes
in these people seem to differ greatly from your peer's opinions.” The man
smiled making it quite clear that different was not always frowned upon by
him.
Blair shifted weight,
relaxed and seemed to come out of his little shell.
Mark laughed at Vin
as Peter and Blair immediately began a serious discussion on tribal warriors
and their abilities to adapt physically to protect their tribes.
“He has found a soul
mate. I’ll never get him away from here, today, Vin, “ Mark laughed again,
shaking his head. “He’s a man starving for intellectual conversation. The very
fact that Mr. Sandburg didn’t take umbrage tells me those two are ready for a
good debate.”
The afternoon went
like a charm. Even Damien, who often bristled around Mark, was relaxed and
friendly. Although he stuck to Vin most times, always eager to help in the
kitchen or light the grill or watch the steaks as they grilled, anything to
work next to Vin, touch him occasionally and be hugged back, he was still
showing courteous interest in his guests and even joined Peter and Blair in a
heated debate about art and it’s moral obligation.
The only crimp in the
day came when Mark and Day got into a slight altercation over the heated grill.
Vin had returned to the kitchen to get some sauce for Mark. Damien was left to
turn the steaks and Mark offered assistance.
“Hey, go easy with
those steaks. You keep slamming them over like that you break the searing and
the juices seep out. I hate dry steak.”
Damien, although not
the domestic sort, considered himself a master of the grill. It was the one
outside activity, besides lovemaking under the stars, which the indoor athlete
liked. “Coletrane, you grow grass, it
doesn’t make you an expert on outdoor cooking,” Day said sarcastically.
“Brat, it was just
some friendly advice, you’d do better if you would just listen to other people
once in a while,” Mark shot back.
“Deeeemmoooon,” the
slow threat came from behind him, just as the blond head snapped back ready to
deliver a retort that no doubt would have had Coletrane ready to take the younger
man in tow.
Day quickly lowered
his head and concentrated on turning the steaks. Mark glanced away, staring off
to the gardens, embarrassed by his own tone.
“Do I need to tell
you to apologize?” Vincent whispered quietly into Day’s ear.
“You don’t even know
what it was about,” Day hissed back. “You just assume I’m wrong.”
“I know you and Mark
and I know it’s your back he bristles.”
Vin waited, keeping a
warning arm around Day’s shoulders as he turned the steaks, slamming them down
now on the grill with a vengeance.
“I’m sorry,” he said,
somewhat harshly.
Gently lifting his
partner's face, he leaned down and kissed the pouting lips long and hard,
ending the bad mood as quickly at it started.
Mark laughed and walked away to join Jim, Blair, and Peter as they
conversed at the patio table, drinking beers and discussing a thousand and one
things.
Blair Sandburg was in
heaven…or surely he had entered some time warp, some academic black hole that
allowed ideas and concepts and philosophy to fill it with good grace. The
afternoon was fantastic. Peter had the young anthropologist in deep admiration.
Peter had ideas about health care that were eons beyond his contemporaries and
he was not adverse to studying ancient cultures and garnering ideas about lifestyles
and herbal remedies in the treatment of illnesses.
Yet, for all the hard
work he turned towards the healing arts, he still had time and interest in art,
literature, music, and philosophy. There was not a subject he did not seem
comfortable conversing on and he was always eager to hear Jim or Blair or Day
or Vin’s opinions on things. Mark, joined in occasionally, but it was obvious
that the younger man loved his partner and was just as eager as the others to
listen to him expound on his ideas.
As the sun was
setting, dinner was coming to an end. Vincent suggested everyone adjourn to the
living room. The house well heated now that the gas lines were fixed.
A quick clean up with
all men pitching in and coffee and cheesecake were awaiting them in the fire
lit room.
“How is Mrs. Dunn
coming along?” Vincent asked Peter.
“Not too well, I’m
afraid,” Peter said as he forked a large piece of cheesecake into his mouth.
“I might send her to
a hospice soon, but I’m not really ready to give up yet," Bailey said as
he gave a surreptitious look at Mark who was conversing with Jim about a
landscaping job he had done a year ago and found a corpse.
Blair caught the
look, but didn’t give it a second thought.
“She just needs me
there a bit more. I can gauge her pain levels better and adjust the treatment,”
Bailey pursued in a softer voice.
“You will get someone
else to do it or you’ll be standing in the corner with a sore bottom while I
get someone else to do it.”
Blair’s eyes widened,
he jerked his plate and almost spilt his coffee. For a small moment in time,
the day was shattered, crimped in that one spot as though a fine ribbon now
bore the markings of a knot.
Instead of being
embarrassed, instead of shrinking off under the guise of humor, Peter looked
lovingly over at Mark’s stern face.
“I know, I was just
thinking.”
"Don't. That sort of thinking lead to the trouble
you got into a few days ago," Mark said, quietly, but sternly.
Peter smiled at him,
nodded once and then leaning against him, said softly, "I love you."
"I love
you," Mark whispered back, squeezing his shoulders.
Peter laughed as he
saw the shocked look on Blair’s face.
“I’m afraid I don’t
act responsibly most times in my profession," he began casually, standing
and refilling his coffee cup. "Oh,
I don’t mean as a doctor but about my own stamina and health care when dealing
with other’s who are sick. Mark has paddled me raw on more than one occasion
when I’ve run myself into the ground trying to keep someone else from sinking.”
Vin watched Blair’s
face. Jim stopped, and seeing the epiphany dawning on his young lover’s face,
he caught Vin’s eye and was answered with a wink.
“You mean…you and
him…I mean it just doesn’t fit,” Blair said, hoping that this one man could
explain the incongruity of these relationships to him.
Peter Bailey
laughed. "What doesn't fit
Blair? The fact that he is younger than
me? The fact that I am a doctor? What?"
There was no anger or censure in his voice, just calling attention and
forcing the other man to discard his previous assumptions. Both he and Mark had been briefed at what
was going on and knew their parts well.
He walked back and casually sat on the arm of the sofa, placing his cup
on the small table beside Mark.
Mark reached muscular
arms up and over and grasping the upper forearms of the older man, he pulled
him forward in a roll, easing him gently onto his lap. Day walked over to
Vincent, who occupied the other winged back chair and was quite glad the group
had moved into a more intimate stage. He was hungry for some attentions of his
own.
Blair still sat
shocked on the loveseat. Jim, noting his reaction, sat down next to him and
placing an arm around his shoulders brought him near. Stiffening at first,
Blair seemed to fight the evidence before his own eyes. Here was a man who kept
his identity, his individuality, his own remarkable oneness and, yet, gave
himself up into a disciplinary relationship with a younger man who could not
hold a candle to him in either experience or education. Yet, there was love and
it was deep and abiding and accepted.
“It’s easy, Chief,”
Jim whispered into Blair’s ear as he felt him relax against him, “all you have
to do is accept it and accept who you are.”
Burying his face into
Jim’s shirt, Blair hung on for dear life as though he had been drowning for
days or weeks and just now realized it. Now he held onto the one thing that
could pull him up and out and he just didn’t know how to ask.
The winds whipped up
and the occupants of Halcyon were glad they had heat. Ellison rubbed a weary
hand across his face, resting his lower arm on his forehead, frustrated with
the uneasy night and his even more restless partner.
Blair had tossed and
turned, fluffed and puffed the pillow, moaned and groaned along with the howling
night until Jim was ready to tie him down. Instead he hooked out a steel band,
trapped the other’s waist and pulled the younger man to him, anchoring him
firmly to his side.
“That’s it, Sandburg,
you’re wearing yourself out with all the floundering, just lie still and
relax.”
“I can’t, Jim, I just
can’t seem to find a comfortable position.”
“Why can’t you
sleep?” Jim asked, trying to find out the cause of his discontent. “I thought
you had a nice day. You and Peter sure seemed to hit it off.”
“Actually, I did.
It’ll be quite memorable in more ways than you think,” Blair mumbled
cryptically against Jim’s neck, the warm breath tickling the hairs in that
region. He yawned and took a deep
breath, his mind exhausting him with unwanted thoughts.
“Care to share the
mystery behind that remark, Chief?” Ellison asked, having a pretty good idea he
already knew.
“I guess
self-realization only goes so far. I think epiphanies are great and all, Jim,
but if you analyze your insights into things they lose their moment of glory.”
“Sandburg, you’re
talking in riddles. Make sense or go to sleep,” the detective growled, “as a
matter of fact, I’d rather you go to sleep.”
The smaller man
pushed off with one hard shove and rolled out of bed. Wearing the warm flannel
pajamas Vin had bestowed on him the night the Gazebo fell, he looked lost in
the long limbed garment. Not even bothering to roll up the fallen cuffs and
sleeves, he moved away from the bed.
Jim sat up, confused.
“I mean, man, we had
an agreement, a commitment. I thought it was binding for six months.”
With that said, he
opened the door and swiftly left the room, barefoot and confused.
Ellison sighed
wearily, and clad in his usual sleepwear of boxers and t-shirt, he followed
after his upset lover.
The embers still
glowed in the dying fire. The soft wall sconces lit the way into the huge
room. Blair threw himself face down on
the large sofa and kicked his legs violently up like a child in the early
stages of a tantrum. It’s so unfair, he thought, Vin and Mark make it so easy
for Day and Peter. They don’t give them choices all the time, vacillate between
being in and out of the relationship. This whole thing is Jim’s fault, and he
wasn’t even aware he had spoken this thought out loud.
As Ellison came down
the hallway, he passed the library. The light glowed inside, the door cracked
open enough to show the large man sitting at a desk, a glass of brandy in one
hand, the other stroking Desi who sat like an Egyptian icon on his desk.
Handing the cat small treats from an open desk drawer, he pulled his head back
indicating entrance to Jim.
“He just flew past
into the living room,” was the only commentary made.
Then putting down his
snifter, he opened the second drawer of the desk and took out a wooden paddle
laying it on the desk. “How long are
you going to make him suffer when this should have been over with by now?”
Jim picked up the
paddle and looking one more time at Vin, he nodded his head, “I think he just
asked me for it in his round about Sandburg way.”
Vin picked up the
snifter and offered a small salute to Jim with his glass. Then as though some
guru having given all the advice he could on a subject, he swept the cat into
his lap and turned the large leather chair to face out onto the front lawns.
The trees bent and danced in the winds and Cade lost himself in his own
memories of the night.
Jim left him to his
musings and decided to set his brat back on track.
Jim never said a
word, as a matter of fact, Blair was so busy muttering comforting accusations
against his sentinel, not caring whether or not he heard him, he never realized
the man was standing over him. When Jim heard the final aspersion against his
character, “It’s all Jim’s fault,” he grabbed the younger man by his arm and
hauled him upright.
Sandburg gasped in
surprise, but all thought processes were halted as Jim quickly took his place
on the sofa and pulled the anthropologist face down over his knees.
“Damn it, Jim,
don’t,” Blair once again tried to intercede, “it’s not really what I want.”
“Sandburg, be quiet.
It’s not what you want, but it’s what you need and it’s not your decision.
You’re right, it is my fault; but I won’t fail you again. You have nothing to
give up to me anymore, because you already have and I’m in control. We’re not
negotiating every turn in the road. You have a month to go and you don’t have a
say in the matter.”
With that, Jim raised
the oversized pajama tops and hooked his hand in the waistband of the bottoms,
pulling down the pj’s with the boxers in one fluid movement.
Sandburg yelped as
the paddle christened his tender flesh, first one white globe, and then the
other. Jim focused in on the heat emitting orbs as he paddled feverishly each
cheek getting its due.
“Owe! No! Stop!
Please stop!”
The loud smacks
filled the large room and Blair bit his lip, not wanting to wake his hosts,
fearful lest he call an audience. The
paddle was small and round and it left no doubt that it stung like the Dickens.
Jim was past caring about the minor concerns, putting his full trust in Vincent
Cade and any implement he would use on his own beloved brat, he paddled with
the surety of a determined man.
As the cheeks heated
and glowed, Blair wilted with acquiescence. The stiff figure that had been
pulled across Jim’s lap, the buttocks clenching in anticipation and hopes of
avoidance, now limply lay in surrender.
Gauging the spirit of
the penitent as well as the condition of the target area, Jim saw the wall
crumbling before his very eyes. Sandburg let out heavy cries as the paddle made
its final round, harsher, more intense, he recognized the farewell voyage of
the wood. Jim always spanked hardest the final round, bringing the lesson home
with a force that belied a regret for the need.
Pulling the bottoms
and boxers up over the raging mounds, Jim carefully raised the sobbing young
man across his lap.
Wincing with pain on
contact with the hard thighs, Blair grabbed Jim’s t-shirt, hitching up a sob,
he gasped for breath, needing to express some thought.
Ellison pulled him close,
steadying the trembling figure, giving him a home base to return to, reassuring
him that nothing had changed.
“I’m sorry,” Blair
mumbled the words into Jim’s shirt, “I’m sorry. Thank you.”
A smile broke across
Ellison’s face, he had guessed right. Placing a soft kiss on the curly head he simply made his own
admissions and promises, “Next time, Chief, you won’t have to ask.”
Vincent Cade watched
the tall man carry the compliant figure down the hallway towards the
stairs. Turning off the light in his
office, he looked back in to see Desi curled tightly on the sofa, warmly
snuggled in the afghan Vincent had pulled from the closet shelf and placed
there for her benefit.
“Good night, kitty
cat, and thanks for the company.” The
tall man walked slowly towards the staircase, lord of the manor. Smiling to
himself, he shook his head and said to the empty hallway, “Mrs. Coletrane, you
are absolutely right, houseguests can be trying at times.”
Monday wiled away in
languorous bliss. Both brats seemed to want nothing more than to keep their
lovers snuggly with them in bed.
Breakfast, lunch and dinner were “everyman for himself,” and the day was
used to replenish the soul and tighten bonds.
Jim held off telling
Blair about his request to go paddle shopping with Vin and Day until just
before bedtime. It did not ease the
argument in the slightest, but it did give him less exposure to the complaining
and uncooperative attitude.
Blair sat on the bed
in their room watching Jim change clothes, trying not to pout but not doing a
good job of it. "I don't want to
go, Jim."
When that
pronouncement failed to draw a response from his lover, he said louder, "I
do not want to go. You can if you want,
but not me."
Scooping his wallet
from the dresser and slipping it into his back pocket, Jim turned to face his
lover. "This is not open for
discussion, Blair," he stated matter-of-factly. "I would have thought that after spending an hour in the
corner last night for this very argument you would have gotten that fact across
to you."
Blair opened his
mouth to object again, but Jim cut him off.
"One more word
about it and I will go and borrow one of Vin's paddles again and use it on
you."
As his lover's face
twisted into a pout, Jim reached for the door and began to open it.
"Okay, Okay, I
won't say another word. You don't have
to go bother Vin. I'll go."
"Good."
Blair bounded over to
the door, a huge fake smile on his face, "See, here's me happy as a clam
about to go paddle shopping with my partner.
What could be more fun?"
He glanced back at Jim to see what sort of reaction he was getting. "Oh, let's see… maybe shopping for a
new car, maybe having your wisdom teeth removed, maybe having major surgery
without anesthesia, maybe…"
His next comment was cut
off by a quick, sharp swat to his bottom.
"One more word, Sandburg," Jim said, having lost his patience,
but determined not to let it show, "and you will find yourself over my
knee for a long period of time."
The older man glared down at his sullen companion. "I don't care if you are happy about
this shopping trip or not, we are going.
I don't want to hear it. Is that
understood?"
The other man did not
answer, instead finding great interest in his shoes.
Jim grabbed him by
the arm and turned him slightly, delivering two hard swats to his butt. "I asked if you understood."
"Yes,"
Blair said grudgingly
"Ummm… am I
interrupting something?" a quiet
voice asked from the hall. "Vin
sent me up here to see if you guys were ready." Day looked back and forth, watching the war of wills being played
out. "I can tell him you guys will
be down in a few minutes…" his
voice trailed off.
Jim looked at Blair,
"Are we finished here and ready to go?
Or do we need to discuss it further?" he asked.
Jerking his arm away
from Jim's hold, Blair said, "No, we’re fine. I'm ready. Let's just go
and get it over with."
The three men walked
down the stairs and out the front door to the waiting car. Vin drove with Jim riding in the front. Day and Blair climbed in the back and
quickly were in an animated conversation.
Jim was lost in thought, staring out the window until a quiet yet
understanding voice brought him out.
"I take it your
brat is not too trilled with the shopping trip."
Jim looked over at
the older man and smiled. "No,
he's not. I think he's embarrassed
about it. Not to mention a little
apprehensive about what we are going to buy."
"Well, there's
really nothing to be embarrassed about.
But I can understand. Levi knows
what he's doing, understands the relationships and is a complete
professional. He makes first rate
implements."
"I know,"
Jim laughed, "but I remember going with you that time. I tried to play it so cool, but I was
terrified and embarrassed and couldn't wait to get out of there."
Vin laughed with him
at the shared memory. "If I
remember, young man, you put up a fuss going, too. I believe you were sporting a red behind when we got to the
store."
Jim blushed, still
embarrassed by the memory. "God, that was so long ago, so many things have
changed…"
Vin reached over and
gave Jim's neck a slight squeeze in a comforting gesture, "But, son, so
many things are still the same."
Looking over at his
mentor, his constant source of support and guidance, Jim smiled.
Forty minutes later,
Vin pulled the car into a long drive that led to a modest, two-story, red-brick
house. Ivy covered one corner with rose
bushes decorating the opposite side. A
second building, also brick, was half-visible in the back. After he parked the car in the driveway,
Vin and Jim opened their doors and got out.
Day quickly followed; his attitude a little more cautious and subdued
than what it had been earlier. Blair
remained in the back seat of the car, his arms folded across his chest, face
set in a determined look.
Jim sighed and opened
the back door. Holding out his hand to
his partner he said softly, "Come on, love, it's not that bad. I
promise."
Taking a deep breath,
trying to calm his nerves and loosen the knot that had settled in his stomach,
Blair took Jim’s hand and allowed himself to be pulled out of the car. Still
gripping the offered hand tightly, he walked with Jim up the sidewalk and to
the front door where Day and Vin were already waiting.
Day turned as they
approached and gave Blair a warm and comforting smile.
The door opened to
reveal a smallish man, slightly shorter than Blair, but outweighing him by a
good fifty pounds. The balding head and
glasses added a roundness to his face, and the added genuine smile made him look
like a kindly shop owner from a children’s movie.
"Vin,
Damien," he said, shaking their hands, "perfect timing. I'm so glad to see you both again. And this time you brought friends from the
States."
“Is it that obvious?”
Jim asked, wondering how he knew they were American. Surely he could not
remember Jim’s one visit almost eight years ago.
“Americans have a way
about them. For all the years Vin has been here, he still looks like a
tourist.”
“Levi, for a man who
shortened his name from Leviatus, just so he could sound like a pair of
American blue jeans, I wouldn’t be pointing fingers at what’s obvious and what
isn’t. Actually, I should start
demanding a commission for all the sales I’ve brought you in the past few years,”
Vin responded.
The other man laughed,
good-naturedly, “Well, like Mr. Strauss, I like to think I get to the seat of
most problems.”
“That you do,” Vin
said, ushering Damien ahead of him.
Levi winked at the
younger man, offering a slight pat on the shoulder for support.
Day blushed and said,
“They are very well made, I just wish I didn’t see them as much as I do.”
A hearty laugh
escaped the smaller man.
Vin motioned for Jim
and Blair to step up, saying, “I would like to introduce two good friends of
mine. You might remember James Ellison,
he and I had a relationship several years ago.
This is his life partner, Blair Sandburg."
"Ah, yes, I knew
you looked familiar, James. You were in
the army, or had just gotten out of the army the last time you were here,
right?"
Jim nodded.
"Yes, that was about eight years ago.
I'm now a police detective in Washington State." Pointing to Blair, he said, "Blair and
I have been together over a year now, but this type of relationship is new,
only since April."
Levi smiled at Blair
and shook his hand, patting it with his other.
"Don't be afraid young man, I won't bite. Are you a police officer,
too?"
As much as he wished
to dislike this man, not be friendly in any way, he couldn't help himself. He smiled back, "No, I teach
anthropology at Rainier University in Cascade; I assist Jim on some of his
cases as a police consultant.”
"Ah, a full
plate I see. Well, come, come, let's go
to the workshop and decide what you all want,” Levi said.
Linking arms with
Blair, he pulled the younger man along as though they were involved in some
conspiracy all their own.
“Now, little boy, I
have dealt with many people new to a discipline relationship, so I know what
you are going through. I want to tell you what I’m going to do once we get
inside so you can prepare yourself.
Your partner doesn’t look like he is putting up with any attitude today.
Am I right? I know Vin wouldn’t hesitate for a moment putting Damien over his
knee if he threw any attitude around here.”
Blair nodded,
remembering the conversation before they left the house.
"Okay, when we
get there, I am going to deal with Day and Vin first since they won't take much
time. Then, " he paused,
"it's your turn."
"I'll take you
and Jim into the back room and let him put you in the position he wants a paddle
for; over his knee, over an object, however.
Then we take some measurements, and talk about style. It's quick, I promise you. Maybe about ten minutes of you being in
position and the rest is discussion."
Blair nodded, not
really trusting his voice.
"Just
relax," the other man continued, his voice low and easy, sort of soothing,
"don't be embarrassed at some of the questions I ask you and your
partner. Just think as me as your
doctor in a way." He gave Blair's
shoulder a quick squeeze as they reached the door to the second building.
"Come, come,” he
urged. “Would any of you like tea or coffee?" unlocking the door and
ushering the men inside.
Blair stepped in and
was startled by the interior. It looked
like a living room of anyone's house. There
was a couch and several chairs positioned around a low coffee table with end
tables and lamps. On the other side,
there was a long dining room table with eight chairs around it. A silk floral arrangement sat in the
center. This was not what Blair was
expecting.
Levi noticed Blair's
expression and laughed, "Not what you were expecting? No chains and spikes all over the
place. No sounds of screams and whips
coming from behind closed doors."
Blair laughed and
seemed to relax some.
Walking over to him,
Day said in a loud stage whisper, "They have all that stuff down in the
basement…. Whatever you do, don't go behind that door." Shuddering, he
pointed to a closed door behind the couch.
"Damien!"
Vin barked, "Stop."
Then turning to
Blair, “Ignore him. That's the
bathroom."
Damien caught Blair’s
threatening look and shrugged in a typical ‘what do you expect from me’ kind of
way.
Vin and Damien were
then ushered into the back room.
Blair nervously
walked around the room pretending interest in various objets d'art. Various
twisted shapes made of wood and leather accented the room, presents no doubt
with some meaning to the craftsman of discipline. Passing the sofa he realized
Jim was thumbing through a photo album. Stopping long enough to view the photos
of paddles, switches, and various other objects, he noted the yellow stickers
Jim eagerly marked the pages with.
Vin, Damien and Levi
came out of the back room and each took a seat at the large table. They, too,
had picked up a photo album and were browsing through the many pictures. Levi
had brought a small card file out and was thumbing though it.
“The small oval
paddle that we bought several years ago has gotten a small crack in it and we
need to get a new one,” Vin was explaining.
Levi located the
correct file. “Ah, yes, the seven inch oval.”
“It got a little too
much of a work out, I’m afraid,” Vin laughed.
Damien shifted his
weight and grimaced.
“Well, that’s what
they are made for. Do you want the exact same paddle? Same wood and everything?”
“Yes, please. It’s
perfect.”
“Fine. Should take
about a week or so to make it and send it up to you.”
Several other
selections were discussed and business was concluded.
Levi glanced at
Blair, “Jim, Blair, I’m ready if you are.”
Blair shifted from
foot to foot looking to all the world like he would bolt at any moment. Vin
moved slowly nearer the door as a precaution and Damien looked nervously
around, no doubt wondering whose side to take if all hell broke lose.
There was a
loneliness about the curly-headed young man at that moment that set him off
alone in time. The blue eyes brightened in dismay as his mouth parted in a soft
pout, awed by the suggestion that the reality was upon him.
Standing up, Jim
carried the album towards the back room. Realizing he was the only one moving
in that direction, he turned staunchly, ready to assert control.
Levi, of the
experienced heart, quickly moved in like a wind churning the leaves towards the
compost pile. Hooking his arm through Blair’s, he turned towards Vin.
“Vincent, I think you
and Damien should check out those new climbing ivy I’ve decorated the arbor
with. You would do well to plant those as covering near your portico. I think
it would take care of that draft problem near the entrance hall.”
Vin, waking from his
own ignorant stance, reddened slightly from his lack of insight. Pulling Damien
by the arm, he headed for the door, “Day and I will check it out.”
Jim softened, too,
realizing his own insensitivity in matters. Coming forward he put his arm
around Blair’s shoulder taking him from Levi, “Come on, Chief, it’ll be over
soon. It’s okay.”
The back room was
more along the lines of what Blair was expecting. Along one wall were various paddles of almost every different
size, shape and thickness imaginable.
"Jim, how do you
usually discipline Blair?" Levi
asked, all business now. No doubt realizing that it would be in the young man’s
best interest to be professional and efficient.
"We have a small
room in the house, I sit in a straight back chair usually with him over my
knee. Occasionally, I will be on the
couch, but he is always over my knees. I never discipline him in our bedroom;
that room is reserved for the finer aspects of our relationship."
“Good idea. Good rule
to follow. There is indeed a time and place for everything,” Levi expounded.
His career had placed many doms and subs in his realm. He studied discipline
relationships from every aspect, angle and foil. A man who believed in
discipline, he abhorred cruelty and never stooped to the clientele who would
cheapen his trade.
"Okay, why don't
you have a seat here," he said, pulling out a chair from the wall,
"and put Blair over like you would have at home. Go ahead and remove his jeans and boxers if you do so normally."
Jim pulled Blair
quickly along. The next few minutes, though strained, were nothing more than a
blur to the anthropologist. Jim quickly pulled his jeans and boxers off and
positioned him over his knee. Rubbing his back reassuringly, he never let his
hand leave Blair for even a second.
The young
anthropologist didn’t say anything, but Jim tried to make casual conversation
trying to refocus Blair’s own thoughts up and away from the routine. “How many
years have you been doing this?”
"Going on
fifteen, but my father had the business before me. Now, Jim, when you are paddling Blair, what do you consider your
strike zone?"
"Umm, usually
from about here," Jim said, gently touching a spot on Blair's bottom just
below the clef separating his two checks, "to about here," pointing
to a spot just below the crease under the checks.
"Okay, you know
you can actually go about another inch down without worrying about any
damage," the shopkeeper said, still taking a few measurements. "All right, Blair, you can get up. We are through with that part."
Blair scrambled up
and quickly pulled his jeans back on.
Brushing his hair behind his ear, he continued to fidget with his
clothing, a button here, a belt loop there, constantly allowing himself the
pleasure of the mundane tasks.
"Why don't we go
sit at the table and discuss exactly what you are looking for," Levi said,
smiling at Blair, "See, little one, that wasn't so bad, was it?"
Blair shook his head
and mumbled, "I guess not," though his reddening cheeks foretold the
emotional toll.
Jim saw Vin standing
outside the window talking to his brat. Calling out to the man through the
open, screened window, he watched as Vincent sent Day on another mission and
entered the house.
Levi motioned for
everyone to take a seat at the table. The craftsman sat at one end and the
other two men sat on either side. Vincent pulled up a chair next to Jim.
“All right then,
gentlemen, let’s talk about what you want,” Levi began. “Jim, what exactly are
you looking for? What results do you want? Sting or thud; just an attention
getter or something for some serious, hard discipline sessions?”
“Most of Blair’s
paddlings are short, quick, and not too harsh.”
Blair raised an
eyebrow at this and could not retain a snort.
The paddlemaker
glanced at him and smiled. “Blair, I’m sure that it doesn’t seem like it, but
it’s all relative.”
“I think we want
something that can be used for regular punishments, and maybe something bigger
or heavier for serious offenses. Is that okay, Chief?” Jim asked Blair.
Blair grimaced, “I
don’t think we will use the bigger one at all. This relationship will be over
in one month’s time.”
Ellison looked
quickly at Vin. Vincent just stared at the curly head, watching the nervous
hands shift the hair constantly behind his ear. “Blair’s in the trial stages,”
Vincent clued Levi in.
Ellison smiled in
agreement, “No, I’m sure we won’t. But if you change your mind, Chief, we want
to be prepared.”
Levi waited for the
sharp glances that passed between the three men to find their home base back on
him. He leveled his own clear, blue eyes on Blair. “Advise to you, young man,
don’t be so quick to call off a relationship you have merely tasted. Go the whole nine courses, then give the
critics the reviews.”
Then as though his
sales pitch were never interrupted, he continued his queries, “All right, now,
are you looking for something with more sting than thud or more thud than
sting?”
“Sting, definitely. I
don’t want to risk bruising or marking at all.”
“Okay, so no holes
then, either. Give me a moment and I’ll see what we have.” He got up from the table and disappeared in
the back room, returning quickly carrying about a dozen paddles. Spreading them
out on the table in front of the men, he explained their different uses and
feels.
“Here, James, try
this one. It’s one of my more popular ones for a standard paddle. It’s light
with good rebound for plenty of sting. The shape makes it easy to concentrate
on one spot or encompass both cheeks if you want.” He handed Jim a rounded
paddle about eight inches long.
“This looks like the
one we just ordered, Levi,” Vin said.
“Yes, it’s similar.
Yours has a little more weight behind it for a greater sting, but with this
little one,” he said, smiling at Blair while shaking his head, “I don’t think
he can handle as much as your demon can, at least not right now.”
Vin nodded in
understanding and turned to Jim. “It’s
a good paddle and makes quite an impression on Day.”
Jim ran his sensitive
fingers over the smooth wood, noting the lack of imperfections and the careful
care taken to smooth the edges. “It’s beautiful. It handles well, very
balanced,” he said, giving it two practice swings as if paddling someone.
“Now, this one,” Levi
said, handing over a slightly larger paddle, “I think you would use for more
intense discipline sessions or more serious offenses. It’s too large to
concentrate on one spot easily and will strike both cheeks all the time.”
Jim took the offered
paddle. The blade was over nine inches. Shaking his head, he handed it back,
“No, I think that’s too much.” Looking up at Blair, he couldn’t help but notice
a small hint of shock on the younger man’s face. Meeting eyes, blue contacting
blue, a secret passed between them, an acknowledgment of need and control, but
also of love and patience and kindness with a firm hand.
“All right, let’s go
for more sting than just bigger.” Selecting another paddle, he handed it to
Jim. It was about the same size as the round one, slightly curved, but longer
and narrow. “This is really several thin pieces of wood glued together. It has
excellent rebound and sting. It’s long enough to strike both cheeks at the same
time, it is great to concentrate on the sit spot and the upper thighs.”
Jim nodded as he took
this, “I like this one better.” Slapping it against his hand, he winced
slightly. “Boy, this one does sting.”
“Yes, it’s good for
those who want sting but do not want to go the leather straps or tawses.”
“No, I don’t’ want to
do that.”
Handing the paddle to
Blair, he waited for the other man’s opinion, choosing to make his lover feel a
part of the proceedings, not just an object of them. Blair swallowed hard and
handed it back. “It’s good. I don’t
think we will be using it though,” he said, as the litany of denial continued.
“I’m sure we won’t,
Chief, but better safe than sorry.”
Levi continued to
discuss blade length, hardness of woods, instruments that delivered more sting
than thud, and generally enlightened Jim on the various instruments at his
disposal. Blair listened, only slightly embarrassed now. Levi spoke like a man
who researched his craft and he was very eager to instruct Jim on instruments
of persuasion not cruelty.
As they concluded the
transaction, Levi reached over and grabbed Blair’s arms as he nervously toyed
with one of the paddles. “I’ve handled many transactions, young man. Many
younger men less lucky than you. James, here, loves you and every question
asked, every choice made, was with your best interests in mind. I’ve a sharp
mind and and a keen insight into these relationships. You’ve chosen well. Rest
assured.”
Blair mumbled a
confused, “Thanks, I guess I have,” as he caught Jim looking at him. Still not
thrilled with the proceedings, not convinced of any necessities for the
purchases, he would not acquiesce too easily, but Jim noted the straightening
of his back and a grin passed between him and Vin as they rose. The kid was
secretly proud and pleased at Levi’s observations.
It wasn’t until the
ride back to Salisbury that Blair gained a certain insight into the whole proceedings,
his anthropological, scientific nature getting the better of him.
Damien had eagerly
pleaded with Vin to ride in the front with him and Blair seemed just as eager
to ride with Jim in the back. As they
each circled the car arranging the seating positions to everyone’s liking, Vin
passed Jim and whispered in his ear, “Day, and no doubt Blair is too, always
feels the need to cuddle on the drive home. Don’t ask me why?”
Halfway towards the
estate, Blair raised his head from Jim’s lap where he had tried to nap while
the large detective stroked his hair. Quickly glancing in the front he saw the
blond head resting against Vin’s shoulder, a soft snoring sound accompanying
the classical music Vin had the radio tuned to.
“I hated it, Jim,” he
admitted, once again resting his head in his lover’s lap. Jim resumed the
stroking motion and looked down into the blue eyes as they stared at the back
of the leather seat. “But I feel more connected somehow, more assured for some
reason. It’s like a right of passage, a realization that you’re serious about
me and about our relationship.”
“Was there ever any
doubt about it, Chief?”
“No, I mean, man, I
know you, you’re pretty stubborn, Jim.”
A slight swat to his
behind, brought a smile to his face, “I guess there’s just more commitment in
it, now. I know we won’t need those paddles, Jim, I know it was more a token
gesture, but I realize these relationships are very real and very necessary. No
doubt Levi sells more than he needs to live in comfort.”
“No doubt, Chief, and
I’m sure we’ll have very little use for all three paddles, but we’ll be ready
in case we do.” Glancing up, he caught
the brown, somber eyes reflecting back from the driver’s seat. The conversation
was acknowledged in a quick wink and a smile. The simple attempt for
understanding showed the young man was turning over leaves within his own mind
and marking pages for his life.
The remaining time at
Halcyon Heights was idyllic simplicity. Marked with hours on the terrace, long
walks by the river, picnics on the lawns, the friends cherished each moment and
willed the time to slow.
On the day of
departure, Blair gave Day the cat wind chimes. The young blond head nodded
several times as he opened the small gift bag and pulled away the paper. The
tinkling sound seemed to delight him and he hugged Blair with a force that
belied need and misery. “I’ll miss you. I’ll miss you so much.”
“Hey, we got e-mail
and there’s always the chat rooms,” Blair piped in overly-cheerful, hiding his
own misery at the goodbyes.
Vincent graciously
accepted the onyx paperweight and he pulled his old friend into a forceful bear
hug. “You call, Jimmy, you let me know you’ve arrived safely. You also keep me
posted on your eating habits and your state of mind. I’d best get reports every
twenty-four hours or Simon Banks gets a call from me. Got it?”
“Got it, Vin, and
I’ll be expecting you in the States within the year.” Jim turned to Damien,
“Day, I’ll expect you bring him like we discussed.”
“No problem, Jimbo,
the Art Critic is anxious to carry a new painter and I think Vincent Cade,
American landscape artist, will be a big hit back here as well as the States.
You’ll see us real soon.”
Even Desi came into
the large living room and stood anxiously by mewling softly in agitation at the
distressed emotions of the departure. Day swooped her up into his arms and
dangled the chimes for her as she swiped the dancing cats with her paw.
Patrick had driven up
to drive them back to London and the airport and he discreetly stood by to lend
assistance.
The final farewells
were manly gestures of swatting arms, backsides and heads. Much good cheer
echoed the landscape and the sleek car pulled away and headed the American men
one step closer to the States.
Blair’s head rested
on Jim’s shoulder throughout the long transatlantic flight. The lights in the
cabin were dimmed and most of the passengers, easing the boredom of the long
flight, had decided to watch one of the offered movies or sleep. One or two
sporadically placed individuals read or pecked away at keyboards.
Jim, unable to find
rest and uninterested in the movie, his head filled with memories and concerns,
was somewhat startled to realize his sleeping partner was staring up at him
with wilted blue eyes.
“What’s the matter,
Chief,” he asked quietly, consideration for the passengers.
“I’m not sure I want
to continue after the six months, Jim,” Blair said.
Jim’s jaw clenched,
his own musings similarly drifted that way as he ruminated over the past three
weeks.
“But I don’t think
Vin and Day have such a bad relationship, at all.” Blair paused, as though
still arranging some thoughts within his own mind. “But I can assure you, if we
do continue, you’ve wasted your money in Bath.”
Ellison raised his
eyes to heaven, not so much in exasperation or thanksgiving, but in total
amusement and befuddlement. Just when he thought it was over, it was only the
beginning. He pulled the head down again onto his shoulder, patted the cheek
gingerly, and glancing out into the clouds he mouthed into the glass, “Thank
you, Cade, thank you.”
Vincent Cade stood looking out upon the lawns, his arms folded across his chest, looking like lord of the manor in every sense of the word. The soft slant of his mouth hinted at anger from anyone not knowing the older man. Upon closer inspection, upon viewing the golden haired young man who walked out to pick up the late summer blooms for the breakfast table, one would realize it was a loving humor that marked his smile now.
The orders were given
with a sharp smack to the grouchy young man’s bottom. “Breakfast on a day like
this requires fresh cut blossoms, don’t you think, brat?” Cade set the plates on the breakfast nook
table and looked out at the green lawns, dew crested and sparkling as the sun
claimed the misty countryside.
“Off with you now.
Remember, it’s Goldenrods and Purple Pansies that’ll brighten our table this
fine morning.” With that he smacked the defiant bottom a few times, sending the
younger man off in a stomping fit to collect the treasured blooms.
Vincent set down the
breakfast preparations as he saw his lover move sulkily towards the flowerbed.
It was one of the few spared lots from the day of destruction.
The older man moved
quickly towards the huge window in the grand entrance hall. Folding his arms
across his chest in typical Vincent Cade style he watched as his petulant brat
bent down and tugged hostilely on the tender blooms. Shaking his head,
muttering to himself, Cade shifted from foot to foot. “Get down and pull them
gently, young man,” he directed from the sidelines, fully aware that no one
heard him, let alone the young man on the other side of the glass who was yards
away.
He watched as the
golden head bobbed up and down as Damien collected a fine bouquet. “Look,
Demon, look for once instead of sulking with your eyes half closed to the
possibilities of the day.”
Then, as though he
could indeed instruct from behind the thick glass, the young head turned
slightly and then quickly returned to stare at a spot in the garden bed.
“By George, I think
he’s got it,” Cade mimicked in a sophisticated Rex Harrison imitation.
The sunlight caught
the golden locks, but the smile that broke across the young features melted any
and all attempts at golden glory. Damien St. Claire bent low to retrieve his
treasure. His joy evident as he turned his face heavenward and whooped.
Vincent Cade merely
smiled. Finding the ring on Sunday under the barbecue grill as he prepared it
for their guests, he had planted the find near the goldenrods. “Let the Demon
think he’s won this time, Mrs. Coletrane,” he offered up his benediction to the
heavens, “Lord knows, it’s me who gets to keep the prize. “
The End
We thank you for
reading and hope that you have been entertained.