An Interview with the Rei Kai Prince!!!

 Guess that's enough background, let's go interview Koenma-sama now.

(the shrine keepers enter the Rei Kai palace, and a sheepish-looking Saotome George greets them.)
George: I'm sorry, but Koenma-sama said he'll be a little late for the interview.
Misty: It's all right, we can wait. Well, why don't we interview you first?
George: Me?!
Karina: Yes, you. So...what can you say about Koenma as a boss?
George: You'll interview me? (shakes head in disbelief) Oh, well. Koenma-sama's a pretty good boss, I guess, although sometimes he can be such a short-tempered spoiled brat...
(A teenaged Koenma suddenly appears behind George, and boy, did George become surprised!)
George: Ko-koenma-sama!! I-I was just entertaining these two people, and...and...
Koenma: (glares) What did you say about me?
George: Koenma-sama, forgive me! I was just---!
Koenma: Excuse me, ladies.
(Koenma starts to beat the unfortunate oni up)
George: Koenma! I'm sorry!
Koenma: Short-tempered spoiled brat, huh? What makes you think that I'm short tempered, huh?!
POW!  BLAG! BOING!
Misty and Karina: *sweatdrop*
(Koenma then stops, and a bloody and bruised Saotome George drops to the ground) 
Koenma: I'm sorry for the distraction, but let's get on with the interview, then.
Misty: Okay. Well... as prince of the Rei Kai, what exactly do you do?
Koenma: Well, I sort and stamp documents all day... as you can see from the series. And I'm the one who assigned Yusuke as a spirit detective.
Karina: Why DID you assign Yusuke as a spirit detective?
Koenma: Well, I assigned Yusuke because of Sensui, the spirit detective I assigned before Yusuke. He was totally serious and dedicated to his work that he went nuts...
(An oni suddenly comes in, holding a big box.)
Oni: Koenma-sama, I saw this on the front door. It's for you.
Koenma: Oh, really? (he starts to open the box.) Why thank--
(A big fist suddenly pops out of the box and punches Koenma on the face!)
Misty: Oh, dear, Koenma-sama, are you all right?
Koenma: (dizzily) I-I'm fine...wow! There sure are a lot of stars today...yipee...
Karina:*sweatdrop* Oh, look, there's a card from whoever sent this box... it says, "LEAVE SENSUI-CHAN ALONE! I WILL DO A LOT MORE THAN THAT THE NEXT TIME YOU INSULT MY EVER DEAREST SENSUI...HAHAHAHA!!!!" It's signed, "Sensui's obsessed fan, Sensui's Sweetie Honey Pie-chan."
Misty: Sensui-chan? Geez...talk about obsession. *sweatdrop*
 Koenma: (stands up) Anyway, Sensui became so convinced that humans should be obliterated from the face of this Earth so, I assigned someone who wasn't so serious as the next Rei Kai tantei... and that's Yusuke!
Misty: We observed that you have two forms. Why do you have to have those two forms?
Koenma: Well, I'm usually seen in my toddler form, but when I'm in the Ningen Kai, I use my teenage form so people won't laugh at me. But I still keep my pacifier, though.
Karina: Why the heck do you still wear that pacifier?! Don't you think people will laugh more at a teenaged guy who still wears a pacifier? (bursts out laughing)
Koenma: (looks thoroughly embarrassed) Well, um, I...
Misty: (tries to suppress a giggle) Hehehe... Well, does your pacifier have some purpose?
Koenma: Actually, it does. During our battle with Sensui, my pacifier served as a seal to the hole in the barrier separating the Ningen Kai and the Ma Kai. It can also help in healing injuries, just as I did with that little kid... Amanuma's his name, I think. The reason why I keep it in my mouth is that if it stays in my mouth, I can store my spiritual energy in it.
Karina: But still, why a pacifier? Why couldn't it have been a ring or something? You look utterly ridiculous with a pacifier on... HAHAHAHA!
Koenma:(indignantly) Yoshihiro Togashi... I mean my father made it that way! How dare you insult the Rei Kai prince! I'll call my Rei Kai tantei if you continue to...
Misty: Rei Kai tantei? Could you call Kurama instead? You know, I'm a big fan of his, and I'd love to meet Kurama-kun in person...
Karina: Misty-chan... we're here to interview Koenma-sama!
Misty: Oh, yeah. Anyway, Koenma-sama, that's also one thing we wanted to ask you. Is it true that you're really so intimidated by your father that you're afraid to disobey him?
Koenma: That's not true! I'm willing to disobey my father for Yusuke-kun and the others. Once, my father assigned the Rei Kai's special defense unit to kill Yusuke, but I tried to stop them. And I also went to Ma Kai against my father's orders, just to help Yusuke and the others fight Sensui.
Karina: Wow... Koenma-sama, that's great! I'm really sorry for all those insults we said earlier... to tell you the truth you're my favorite male character in Yu Yu Hakusho!
Koenma: Really? (looks pleased)
Misty: Darn, now I'll never get to meet Kurama.
Karina: Anyway, Koenma... did you really fight with Yusuke and the others?
Koenma: To tell you the truth... not really. Usually, I just watch Yusuke and company on a screen in the Rei Kai. But during the Ankoku Bujutsukai, I DID go with the others as a replacement for Genkai, after she was killed by Toguro the younger. I never got to fight, though, thank goodness... but anyway I had this bet with Sakyou-san, the one who started the Ankoku Bujutsukai, that Yusuke and the others would win. Whoever loses the bet would have to give up his life. And thankfully... Yusuke and the others won... which is a great relief.
And also, I tried to stop Sensui using my pacifier. That was the time when Yusuke died for the second time in the series.
Misty: I guess that's all, Koenma-sama. Well...it was nice talking to you!
Karina: (hugs Koenma tightly) Oh, Koenma, thank you!!!!
Koenma: Um, Karina-san....please let go of me, Botan just might get jealous...

SEIYUU

Tanaka Mayumi Born on January 15th, 1955 in Tokyo. Her blood type is A. She works for Ohhashi Kyosen Jimusho. Also appears in animes as: Tsukayama Yutarou (Rurouni Kenshin), Kirishima Kanna (Sakura Taisen), Kuririn (Dragonball/DragonballZ), Mojara (Mojacko), Fujinami Ryuunosuke (Urusei Yatsura), Mei Xing (3x3 eyes)

 
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