YESTERDAY, TODAY, FOREVER (PART 1/?)
by Michelle Creek
(missy@ipax.com.au)
Written: 25/8/98

DISCLAIMER: The characters of ER are the property of Michael
Crichton, Warner Bros. Constant Productions and Amblin Television and
the actors who so marvellously portray them.

Any comments and/or constructive criticism will be gratefully received at
the above e-mail address.

PART 1/?

Kerry sighed with relief as she closed the door on her visitor, leaving her
with one of the biggest decisions she had had to make in her life.  Although
she had really already made her decision, she now had forty-eight hours in
which to decide whether she would refuse or accept the offer.   Looking
down at the sheaf of four pages and single photograph grasped firmly in
her left hand, she really wanted more information but experience had told
her that this was all that was ever available.

Waiting over the past two years had been harrowing, filling out the
documents as they came through the mail, the insignia on the top of the
envelope always signifying before she opened it what the letter was related
to.  She always held her breath, wondering whether they would make the
decision that her disability would exempt her from approval.  As it
proceeded through the process, she gained confidence and had passed her
medical with flying colours, satisfying the departments requirements in all
respects.  Now these four pages and photograph signified the end of a long
journey of waiting but also signified a new beginning.

Although she had been through the information thoroughly with the
department official, she now sat down again in her comfortable
wingbacked chair and looked more closely at the small photograph and
smiled wistfully.    She could not wait until she returned to Africa, to the
land which held such diversity and beauty in its habitat and people. 

Her early years had been spent in Africa.  Her father had been a
missionary doctor, working in Zaire and her mother, a nurse.   Her life had
been quite different from that of American children, her pre-school years
spent travelling with her parents to villages.   She had played with the
children at each of the villages, mixing in and learning to communicate in
their own language with them.  Kerry had been looked upon with awe, her
straight auburn hair a bright halo against her pale skin.  The elders in the
villages had crooned over her, taking her under their wings.  They had
ensured her safety while her parents worked on the sick, teaching her as
they would teach their own.  

It had all come to an abrupt end at the age of seven when the polio
epidemic had ripped through Zaire, the contaminated water supply
spreading the disease along its shores.  When Kerry had succumbed to the
infection, her parents had been forced to return to America to obtain
specialised physical therapy to regain the use of her legs.

As soon as she had begun her pre-med course in college, Kerry had
determined that she would go back to Africa.   During her first and second
residency years, she had answered the call for medical staff in Ethiopia,
devastated by the ravages the famine had wrought upon its people.

Their plight had been tragic and so different from the life she remembered
as a child in Zaire.  Having lived in America in the meantime, the contrast
between the two cultures hit Kerry hard.  The suffering of the young
children impacted on her the most, their distended egg-shaped stomachs
large against their thin stick-like arms and legs.  Large, dark brown eyes
had haunted her sleep each night, as they had watched her silently as she
treated them, not knowing if she would see them alive the next day.

It had been for this reason, when she returned to America, that she had put
in her formal papers, making the decision she had been toying over during
the time she had spent in Ethiopia.  

There was no real need in her own mind for the forty-eight hour delay
before she was allowed to officially give her decision.  She knew now that
she would accept the offer.  But that was the official regulations to ensure
she had properly thought out her decision.  Shaking her head, with a smile,
she thought that if she had wanted to change her mind, she would have
done so at some stage in the past two years.

Looking at her watch, she realised that the interview had taken longer than
expected.  Her shift was due to start in less than an hour and she still had
to get across town.   Picking up her purse from the open briefcase on the
floor, she slipped the small photograph inside.   Placing it back on the glass
topped coffee table, she collected the used mugs and plate of biscuits in
each of her hands, balancing them  carefully as she limped her way slowly
back to the kitchen.

Packing away the left over biscuits back into the biscuit barrel adorned
with a Christmas scene, she quickly rinsed the mugs and plate before
heading back to the lounge, leaving them on the draining rack to dry.    

Closing  her briefcase on the pile of budget reports and files, she found that
they didn't fit.  It was then she remembered that Donald Anspaugh had
dropped in some other reports for her to look at.  Taking out the extra files,
she locked the briefcase and balancing it, the extra files and her keys, she
picked up her crutch.  About to set the deadlock on the front door, she
caught sight of her purse still on the coffee table where she had left it.

Cursing herself, Kerry picked it up and gave another quick glance around
the room to ensure she left nothing else.  Setting the deadlock, she closed
the door and headed out into the crisp autumn air.

                   - 0 0 0 -

Parking her car, Kerry did a careful balancing act once again between the
briefcase, files, her purse and keys.   About to give up on the juggling act
and place her purse in a small space in the briefcase, she changed her mind
when the heavy clouds above finally decided to drop the rain that had been
threatening to fall all afternoon.  

Careful not to lose her footing on the wet ground, Kerry scurried as fast as
she could towards the hospital, cursing herself for the second time that day. 
She had left her umbrella sitting in the stand beside the door and her spare
was parked in her locker.  

Finally reaching the hospital, she pushed open the emergency room
department doors with a well practised swing of her hip.    That was all
that was needed for her to loose the balancing battle.  The files, her purse
and keys went flying across the floor.  Papers and manilla folders
separated, lining the floor from the entrance to just before the central work
station, her purse and keys colliding with the wall and coins scattering
from the open clasp.  

Kerry shook her head, thinking about the quiet entrance she had wanted
to make, not drawing attention to the fact that she was running late.  It was
not a good example for the medical students and residents and it was one
thing she stressed most pointedly and berated those who actually turned up
late on.

Shrugging her shoulders, she realised there was nothing that could really
ruin her day after the offer she had had this afternoon.  The staff witnessing
her losing control of her files only brought a smile to her face as she
realised what a sight it must be.  She was drenched from head to toe with
the sudden downpour with a carpet of papers marking her entrance.  
Heads had turned at the sea of papers flying across the floor and all eyes
were glued to her.

"Here Kerry, I'll give you a hand picking those up." Carol said as it
dawned on her the awkwardness with which Kerry was bending down to
collect the papers.   Drawing in Randi and Jerry to assist, they quickly
collected the papers and manilla folders.

"Sorry.  You'll have to sort them into order yourself." Jerry said as he
picked up the last paper from the floor, placing it on the growing pile in
her hands.

Randi bent down to pick up Kerry's purse.  It lay open, showing the
photograph she had placed underneath the clear plastic cover.    Randi
looked at the photo curiously.  She knew Kerry had spent time in Africa
but this was different.  

"Who's this?" she asked as she handed the purse back to Kerry, keeping
it open at the photograph.

Giving a smile and looking again down at the photograph, she replied
"This is my daughter."

END PART 1/?