whybratsbrat

           why do brats brat and what to do about it

ok recently i was confronted with a person that thought the best way to deal with a brat in brat mode was to ignore her brattiness and it would go away, like a child having a temper trantrum He said, ignore it, walk away and they will stop....this might just work with a kid having a fit screaming and kicking but it will NOT and i repete strongly it WILL NOT work with stoping a brat in full blown brat mode, it will however make it alot worse and then you are facing an out of control brat and that can mean self destructive behavior on her part. Not to mention what it can do to a relationship. why will it make it worse? Well, just like children brats have issues with feelings of abandonment. Ignoring her is like saying ok IF you are good and perfect and NEVER make waves I will love you but not until then..it is like emotional blackmail and very hurtful to a brat... we have been through hell finding who we really are most have selfesteem issues as it is... ignoring us only makes that worse and makes us feel we dont deserve that love.
Ok so lets take a look at a few reasons that brats may go into brat mode and act up. these are off the top of my head as i am very impassioned at this moment to get this information out there getting to know your brat is the best way of finding out why she brats and what she is needing.
     OK..... we brat for attention that is true, and any self respecting brat will tell you even alot of attention isnt always enough, should we get by with this? hmm nooooo.... it is up to you the Dominant to set the ground rules and stick to your guns. we brat out of fear and just need reasurance, let us know that our fears how ever wild they may seem are ours and you understand but we are safe to be who we are....frustration will cause a brat to flaunder and brat out because we need to let you the Dominant take over and take that control...we need that alot and some times we cant just let go of it you have to be ready to take it and at times that may mean tossing us over your knee and spanking the butt real good just so we can kick and scream out our frustrations...its not being mean to us when you do it in a loving way with our best interest at heart it is quite helpful and we can sob out how cruel the world is and then cuddle up close all calm and   snuggly when its over...
      we brat out of anger, when we are frustrated for to long it becomes anger and we dont really know why we are mad... but we are and we brat and most of the time we turn that brattiness on our Dominant counter parts because we have hopes that you will make it better like the little girl holding the broken toy pouting" fix it Daddy"
     we brat when our needs emotionally or sexual are not being met. and believe it or not discipline is part of a brats make up of needs. leave us undisciplined and you will have a flaundering out of control brat that will demonstrated sever self destructive behavior and at times sabotoging the relationship without realizing it. it can be quite devastating for us not to have structure and discipline in our lives... we may start communicating this need by "playing at being disrespectful" saying little things to get your goat not doing little things you would have us do... this is our way of subtley communicating that we are in need.. offer your brat good solid loving discipline and you will see extraordinary results. and yes again i can not stress strong enough "continued communication"
       A real life situation on just what happens when a brat gets outta control........
       a few months back, i was bratting on my Dom time and time again.... He wasn't giving me the discipline i needed He wasn't helping me stay in the bounds He had set for me.... it wasnt because He didn't want to, He just didnt know what to do... we are sending mixed messages when we say treat a brat like a child... in some ways thats true but its more like we are child like not really children and since He didnt believe in spanking His OWN real kids He never spanked me He said that in order to treat me the way i needed He needed to be less DaddyDom and just the plain ole Dom and bust my butt good and it worked! i never realized i was sending mixed signals in describing how to deal with a brat... treat her like you would a child i would say... but there is a gray area there He brought to my attention....alot of us have a little mode (see more about baby girl brat subs to learn about that) that in all reality is the child part of us not the brat we are fully adult and think like an adult mixed with child like behavior...so now i am off my self destructive path and on the right road again with His help but it took its toll on our relationship and caused us to break up for awhile...but it took Him busting my butt until i was in tears to get me back on track and to regain the respect i had lost since He wouldnt do it before i figured He didnt care about me enough to keep me in the lines that He made for me... i felt He was ignoring my needs by ignoring my bratting for attention and all i wanted was to be disciplined and to made feel secure and loved... i am now infact very secure and feel very loved in His care. He has 2 new paddles and a cane that He will and has used. You may not have to go to these extremes with your brat Mine however did and i am so glad that He did.He never ment to ignore my needs He just needed a more clear meaning of what i needed and at times its very hard for us to ask for what it is we need...brats are for the most part independant lil critters and we feel embarrassed or guilty asking for something for our selves...so we act up it is our way of saying hey see me im not doing what you want not acting in the way you like do something here to stop me or we are saying help me im frustrated and i cant see my way out of this hole... or we are saying im scared and i dont like this feeling help me feel safe and secure again... and some times we are just saying... we need that discipline in our lives to keep us feeling loved and functioning at our top abilities... and then we might just be saying i like having my butt spanked it makes me feel naughty and i like that feeling but i cant ask for it because i will feel embarrassed... thats why communication is the key... know your brat and you will know why she brats and you will know what to do for her and for you in the long run because a happy brat is a loyal devoted brat.....i thought i knew it all about brats( i mean after all i have only been one... all my life) but my DaddyDom helped me understand better in how to tell Him things i need by not leaving so much gray areas in my descriptions of what it is and how to go about it...because a caring Dominant of any type will lovingly try to use what ever means at His disposal in meeting our needs ( notice i say need and needs not wants and desires they are very different, what i want and desire might not always be what is the best for me) i want candy 24/7 but i need a balanced diet to be healthy.. and so on, im sure you get my point there.... anyway i hope this helps with what to do when your brat brats on you... and for gawds sake when she does cut off with a full blown brat attack dont take it personally its not against you... she is just wanting you to do something about it .

Being a Daddy Dom and what it is to me

Let me say at the start I never heard of a daddy Dom before I meet Angel. So this was very new to me, the daddy part, not the Dom part ( chuckles to my self ). We had been writing for while and she ask me if I knew what a daddy Dom is. She explains the daddy Dom was a kinder and gentler dom. Well I thought to myself I can do this. Treat your sub as you would say... a seven year old. Well I have a daughter that is in her twenties and never gave me a bit of trouble ( gosh was I lucky ) . My son is almost twenty (lets say we had a few talks). The thing is I never had to spank either one of my two children. I was thinking all I had to do was treat her the way I treated my two children and we would be fine. I was using the reward and talks with her as well as standing in the corner. Also part of the problem was I miss took her acting up for playfulness, having been told by several people that brats like to play pranks. When it got to the point that I realized there was a problem it was too late. It was also getting me very frustrated. It seemed that anything I tried would not work. I wanted to ask older doms where I was wrong. But the doms that I trusted where all dead. I was to the point of thinking that she was ashamed of me. Shortly after this is when we broke up.
During this time I revisited a lot of web sites and reread them very closely. One web site that I really liked at the time actually tore down brats.
Some time had passed and I called her and we started to talk. We talked more this time than we did the first time. It was during these talks with her that I found out that I was not fulfilling one of her needs. I had tried spanking her a few times, but nothing like she was needing. During our talks I discovered that she wanted me to use a paddle.
Needless to say I went and got one.
My whole point in all of this... is the best way you can find out about the brat you have is to talk to her. Take time, step out of character, but find out her needs. Be open with each other and honest.
Love her and let her know she is the world to you. When she is naughty find out what type of punishment will work for her. And little girls please tell your daddy what your needs are; we cannot read your mind.
As for me I let Angel know how very much she is my world and that I am very proud of all that she does and will stand behind all that she does.
I wish all the best of luck with your little girls

Charles
Aka : master_charles_esq@yahoo.com
Will_of_odin @yahoo.com

ps..... and He lets me know with every whack of that paddle just how loved i am

this page expresses some of the real life struggles between my Daddy Dom and myself in our choosen journey together... we can sit and grin about some now but the fact is... we were both hurt very deeply due to miscommunications... PLEASE don't let this happen to you... we were blessed with a second chance, not everyone gets that... thanks ~angel brat~

CONSISTENT limits... do NOT say NO today and yes tomorrow if You set a limit stick to it or a brat will take that as a sign of weakness and walk all over You.The limits You set are loving guide lines for us to flourish and grow in.and they should be like running into a brick wall unbendable and unbreakable..with the acception of illness and such we shouldn't be allowed to break the limits... go right up to them put our toes on that line but not to cross it and break that limit because then we are taking the control when we do that and are allowed to get by with it and we really dont want that no matter how badly we protest and whine..