Metro HatersRUs |
Dear Sister Rossetta, My wife and I purchased a new Geo Metro from a Chevrolet dealer in San Diego. After we had finished all of the paperwork, one of the lot attendants, who had the name Jesus stitched to his shirt, washed the car for us. Was this a ritual Baptism? Were we in fact symbolically baptized by Jesus? Please help me, this has bothered me for seven years. |
Some crazy persons wacky beliefs about his metro. |
Dear Sir: The Bible Clearly States that Jesus appears occasionally in potato chips, cloud formations, and rusted water towers--but only MOST RARELY in the flesh.Your sighting confirms the rumor that Jesus was hiding inCalifornia under the witness relocation program, but "H" "E" "double toothpicks," he could be anywhere by now. We Christians have been trying to track him down for years with no success. It's a shame when the Savior of our world is reduced to manual labor, but the Bible Clearly States that's the price you pay while you're waiting for the second coming. Treasure your Metro--yes, it is saved in the Lord. If you were IN the car, then Jesus baptized you as well. Where in the world is Jesus Christ?, Sister Rossetta |
Base prices: $8395--9795 Vehicle type: front-engine, front-drive; 3- or 4-door 4-passenger coupe or sedan Interior volume F/R/cargo (cu ft): 47/33--34/8--10 Wheelbase 93.1 in Track, F/R 54.5/53.5 in Length/Width 149.4-164.2 in/62.6 in Height 55.5-55.7 in Curb weight 1750-1950 lb Fuel-tank capacity/EPA city mpg 10.6 gal/29-43 Standard passive restraint driver and passenger airbags POWERTRAIN 1.0-liter SOHC 3-in-line, 55 hp; 1.3-liter SOHC 4-in-line, 70 hp; 5-sp man, 3-sp auto SUSPENSION F ind, struts, coil springs, anti-roll bar R ind, trailing arms, coil springs, anti-roll bar BRAKES F/R disc/drum ABS optional |
Metro Specs |
Here's what a sick person does to a Metro tries to sup it up by putting on a body kit, spoiler, decals, and rims. |
A crazy person driving a Metro thought the mud and crashing it. |
From the Simpsons Maude begs Ned to step on it, but Ned complains, "I can't! It's a Geo!" |