I’m gonna bench press 140,
Pass the dumbbells while you’re at it,
Don’t scoff, I’m feeling haughty.
Look at my abs, they’re bulging,
And my delts are seriously rock hard,
Now I reckon I’m strong enough
To stand up to Julia Gillard.
I’ll show ‘big red’ that I’m the boss,
I’ll come out throwing punches,
Now come on, grab that medicine ball,
I’m up for fifty crunches.
I can’t believe how hard my biceps are,
And my pecs are as heavy as lead,
And I’ve really built up my trapezius,
To carry around my massive head.
Who did nothing whilst trying to look busy,
When the voters were asked,
They threw him out on his arse,
He didn’t see that coming, did he?!
The people realised this man Kevin Rudd,
Was nothing more than a vacuous dud,
Full of self-congratulation,
Seeking constant adulation,
His policies and ideas were just crud.
So while Rudd tried to remain firm,
He had a way of making people squirm,
With his stupid cheesy grin,
And policies paper thin,
He was gone after one disatrous term.
About Australia’s two main political leaders.
One a successful ex-merchant banker,
The other a weasel, a liar, a wanker.
One a successful, likeable bloke,
The other a megalomaniac, sending us broke.
So as we settle in for our Christmas dish,
We’ll all be granted one wish.
Do we wish for peace or an end to starvation?
Or do we wish that Rudd stops ruining our nation?
We’ll all pray for world peace, no doubt,
But let’s also pray the Libs pull their fingers out.
And expose Rudd’s incomepetence as something to fear,
So we can have a Happy New Year!