Artemis
Modern Mythology #1

by maven

STANDARD DISCLAIMER: The characters of Birds of Prey are the property of Warner Bros. and DC Comics, all other characters are the property of DC Comics.

RATING: PG/PG13. Just two people talking. A few bad words.

CONTINUITY and SPOILERS: This is an Alternative Universe as it’s a blend of the Birds of Prey television show and a variety of DC comic books, particularity The Killing Joke and the Batman titles between 1983 and 1991. There will be spoilers for all 13 episodes of the series now that I’ve seen them all.

CREDIT WHERE CREDIT IS DUE: BG wrote this BoP story called Landslide with a short interaction between Commissioner Gordon and Helena. My imagination just ran with it. Warped and Nik suggested a sequel which translated to two series.

STORY SPECIFIC NOTES: Imagine my surprise when it turns out that Gabby appeared in two episodes and was mentioned in (so far as I can remember) one other. So this Gabby is pretty much made up from whole cloth. Plaid, I think. Greens and browns and dull yellowy-gold. Nothing too garish, a hunting tartan rather than a piper's.

FEEDBACK, COMMENTS AND FLAMES: Email at maven369@sympatico.ca



"But…"

I'd been vaguely aware of Helena Kyle since starting at New Gotham High School. She'd show up, infrequently yet memorably, to visit Ms Gordon for lunch or pick her up after school. She seemed to know the entire staff and they certainly had no trouble remembering her name.

"Out."

The first time I'd actually seen Helena Kyle was during my freshman year. She'd stuck her head into Ms Gordon's classroom and then turned to look at first up and then down the corridor. Head cocked as if listening. Nostrils flaring as if scenting her prey. And, thanks to my mom, a name popped into mind to match the image I saw.

Artemis, Goddess of the Hunt.

"But…"

"Out," Helena says firmly, shutting the door firmly in Dinah's face before turning her full attention to me.

"Poptart?" she offers.

When Dinah and I became friends I learned more about Helena Kyle. Or rather, heard more about Helena. Helena says this and Helena says that to the point where I figured Dinah had a Mount Rushmore sized crush on the woman. Which, I figure, she did. Because Helena Kyle had an aura about her that begged you to become obsessed with her. Artemis the Virgin Goddess? Not a chance.

I nod and take one cautiously. "You know, in movies when you find out who Spider-man is… you die."

She snaps off a corner of her Poptart and munches it. Not exactly a reassuring answer. I take a cautious bite of my own Poptart.

"Dinah says you know everything. How much of it do you understand?"

"Very little," I admit. "It's like it's been dumped in my head but I haven't sorted it out yet. What's a cat-woman?"

"My mom. She died when I was your age. Murdered."

I nod. "Yeah, like I know that. I mean I knew it all but until I asked and thought about it I didn't know it. It's all real, isn't it? People with super powers and everything?"

"Pretty much. The kid may have rose coloured glasses about it but essentially it's real. What happened last night?"

I make a few goldfish impressions. "What happened last night," I repeat finally, stalling for time. I wonder how much Dinah told her.

"Up until clothing became optional."

"Ah," I manage. Guess Dinah told them everything. "We got to your place. I was all adrenalin about what happened at the club. And she seemed both calm and hyper at the same time. And she said she'd take the couch but it was really lumpy and too short. No offence."

"It's okay. I certainly don't sleep on it."

"So, we decided the bed was big enough but then I guess I had a panic attack and she seemed scared to touch me so I told her just because I was gay didn't mean I made a pass at every woman I touched and she said she knew that. So she hugged me…"

"And then?"

"Somehow clothing became optional."

"Why?" she asks casually as if she were playing with something. The cat theme extends to the daughter.

"Have you seen her? Talked to her? God, if she wasn't straight… she is straight, right? You're gonna tell me that she's straight and her common sense shorted out from the near death experience at the club and I should just forget about this."

"I am?"

"Of course you are. She had this massive crush on Matt and well, there's that crush on you but, frankly, you sort of transcend gen…"

"Whoa!"

I decide to shut up.

"I didn't need to hear that," she says with a slight shudder.

"Sorry," I mutter. Helena is ferociously crunching the Poptart as if the noise could drown out my earlier words. "What happened last night?" I ask.

She regards me for several seconds. "Dinah is a metahuman, a person with abilities that other people don't have. She moves things with her mind. She can dream about things that are happening halfway across the country. She can read people's minds if she touches them. Very occasionally she doesn't have to touch them to get an impression or emotion."

"What happened last night?"

"Metahumans get their powers in different ways. Some can use them as soon as they're born. Others are triggered by a traumatic event. Others when they hit puberty which, I suppose, counts as a traumatic event."

"What happened last night?"

"The powers don't come with an owners manual. It's all hit and miss and experimentation and, just when you think you've got it down something will happen. It's like puberty times three. Times a million."

"What happened last night?" I ask, a bit louder because, while she's not ignoring me, she's not exactly answering my question.

"Sometimes people get hurt," she says softly, her attention not on me but elsewhen.

I have a cascade of third hand memories. A child crying and a wave of guilt. Terrified eyes of some teenage boy and anguish hits my guts. Trying to grab an arm that's falling away from me and not being able to and a woman who looks like Helena will in ten years brushing away my tears and telling me that everything will be okay. I stagger slightly.

"What happened last night?" I plead. She's looking at me oddly and I figure the memory rush showed but she lets it pass.

"It sounds like Dinah accessed a new power; two way telepathy or something."

"So I was reading her mind…"

"…and memories and emotions from the sound of it."

"…and she was reading mine…"

"…maybe a sort of a feedback thing happened. An amplifier."

"…and then clothing was optional," I finish. She nods and I mull over the whole feedback/amplifier thing. "Was it me?"

Helena pauses before answering. "What do you mean?"

"I, um, didn't, um, did I, ah…?" I struggle to find the words without sounding like an idiot.

"Turn her gay?" she asks dryly, not bothering to hide her slight smile.

"Yeah."

"When I watched DS9 it never seemed a big surprise that Dax was bisexual. I mean, how could she be straight with all those memories, male and female, all those years of experiences and memories? Listening to what you two experienced I figure it's much the same."

"So, me wanting her? That didn't make it happened?"

She looks stunned for a moment and then shakes her head. "Oh, shit, no. It'd be more likely she coerced you. Which will occur to her as soon as she gets over blaming me for the whole thing."

"You?"

"Yeah," she says, blushing and looking down at her feet. "I was a bit… wound up… last night. She picked up on that at the club."

I feel my face flush as well. "You and Ms Gordon?" Dinah had complained about Helena and Ms Gordon being idiots for the last six months. An endless list of how they were ignoring the obvious and afraid to say something to each other and how they were pussyfooting around this large elephant in their life.

Ironic really.

"Yeah," Helena says and she looks up and I wonder if maybe Dinah left some of that telepathy thing behind in my brain because I can almost feel the passion rolling off Helena.

Like I said; virgin goddess, not a chance.

"So," I prompt. "To summarize?"

"Maybe it would never have happened in normal circumstances but between the fight at the club, Dinah's ability and your friendship, it did happen."

"No harm, no foul?" I ask and wonder why my voice sounds so bitter.

"You really like her," Helena says softly.

"Well, she's my friend. Maybe my best one."

"No," Helena says slowly, stressing each word. "You. Really. Like. Her."

"Yeah, I do," I admit, letting all the frustration, exasperation and self-disgust out. I mean, how stupid is it, to have a crush on your best friend? After school special stupid, that's how stupid.

"Well, don't quote me and I have no concrete evidence but…"

"Yeah?"

"I think it's somewhat mutual. Otherwise what happened last night; it wouldn't have happened. She may come across as an airhead blonde but she's got a steel set of ethics on her."

I mull this over and finally nod when another thought occurs. "That was you at the club last night. I mean, that was you beating them up? You just said you arrived when it was over for your secret identity."

She winces slightly over the last two words but not enough, apparently, to trigger another movie show.

"Yeah. Sort of," she says, looking somewhat embarrassed. "C'mon, we're getting into Barbara's conversational territory. I can barely wrap my brain around the need let alone explain the secret ID thing."

"Do you have costumes? I mean other than those leathers, which I must admit, are much sexier looking than latex. And code names? Can I join? And a secret base?"

She groans, looping an arm around my neck and dragging me from the room.

"How am I going to survive two punk kids?"

"Well, you are a superhero, remember?"

END

Next: Athena.

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