The Flying Dutchman
brought to you by courtsey of the 57th-Mailing-List
Enjoy!!


And this is how the story began:


There was once a proud spacecraft called the Magellan, huzzling and buzzling with life of innumerous battle units of the European Marine Corps...
Its inhabitants were happy, chatting and babbling and passing information and misson briefings for their ongoing tour of duty to bring back SAAB ... until one night in 1998 ... it struck...

The corridors are deserted, lightbulbs only give off flashes of light from time to time... there is an eerie feeling all around .. where are the proud Marines?
Sam, the Jester? Amanda, the Sarge? Even in the computer room, the TechSgt. is nowhere to be seen ....

[Comment:
*Sam peeks out over the rim of the Petrie Dish* Sam the Jester? Yes, I could live with that - can I change my Call Sign please?
Brace for Impact!!! - I'm just about to come out of Lurk Mode. 2 weeks of RL is enough for me!

Jester?, 12 May 1998, 13:24]

There are faint sounds coming from a far off corridor ... following it ... you arrive at the General's Cabin, the hatch opens with a creak, it is deserted but for a com terminal which gives off the typical AI sounds....

Have the proud Marines left the ship? Have they been all killed? What will happen to the rest of the squadron who are still out somewhere in the dark reaches of space to support our show, to fight against the inevitable?
Has the Magellan become the flying Dutchman? Is her fated crew now dead?

Una, 11 May 1998, 14:59

***

Soups was suffering from a feeling of deja vu, and smiled as she remembered a similar situation, galaxies away, on another ship......however then as now she was sure that there was nothing to worry about. As she turned a corner she heard a sound, she opened a door and there sat Zeb, with her head in a book. With a quick glance at the title "20 Ways to Entice Lt.Col's Into the Zero G Chamber" Soups knew that she wouldn't get much sense out of Zeb for a loooooong time.

[Uhh..minor correction there, my friend.
Zeb was sitting on her bed, amongst piles and piles of books. The few with visible covers were "100 ways to entice the soft and silent man", "Corps Romances", "Tie Ty Up", "Lt Col's and how to snag 'em", "Get your IV into Zero-G", "Top 1000 methods of seducing IV Lt Cols". Her eyes had rings round them and her pupils were dilated and bloodshot. She had a picture of Lt-Col T.C. McQueen in front of her, covered in drool. Soups knew that she wouldn't get much sense out of Zeb for a looooong time.

Zeb, 12 May 1998, 11:46]


A little further down the corridor, she bumped into Una. Together they decided to search the ship, from one end to the other in search of any other marines. After all, if they were here, there had to be someone else too.

Almost at once, they stummbled across Amanda, who despite feeling poorly was showing much devotion in the duty of polishing her boots. They gave the order to wait where she was, until further notice.

They left Amanda, and continued on their mission. It was then that they...

Soups, 11 May 1998, 19:54

***

Don't know about the rest of you, but when a certain TechSgt is curled up amongst her computers, all hell can break loose and she wouldn't notice.

I once had a hostile security robot come up and put a weapon to my head while I was trying to get the computers on a derelict space freighter back on line... it wasn't until some other Marines came in and attacked the robot that I even noticed it was there!

TechSgt Mexal, 11 May 1998, 23:47

***

[They left Amanda, and continued on their mission. It was then that they...]
discovered dead chigs. They were everywhere, littering the corridor, hanging from the bulkheads...
Una turned to Soups and said "What the *beep* is going on?" Soups immediately silenced the Captain as they heard the sound of an AI's modem. Silently they both drew their side arms and proceeded to stealthily walk up the corridor, this was slightly marred by the crunching and cracking caused by so many chigs underfoot and of course the occasional swearing and muttering as the brave Captains stood in something unmentionable...
They paused as they neared a junction in the corridor, Soups motioned that she would take the right-hand side and that Una should take the left, swiftly they rounded the corner...
nothing, there was no-one there!

Meanwhile back in The Sarge's quarters, she was just putting the finishing touches to her boots, ready for Friday, when VA2ECM bolted though the hatch and slammed it behind him. The Sarge raised a quizzical eyebrow, the AI grinned inanely. "would you like a cup of WD40?" the sarge asked, "oh yes please" relied VA. The sarge sauntered across to the toolbox rummaged around for a few seconds and pulled out her can of oil, "mmmm 2058, a very good vintage I believe". She poured some of the oil into a cup and handed it to VA, it was then that she noticed her large adjustable spanner, she picked it up and hefted it from one hand to the other, a large evil grin spreading across her face. She casually strolled across the room, and proceeded to commit unspeakable acts of violence about the AI's person.
When she was done she said in a satisfied tone "That will teach you not to throw dead chigs at me in the Tun!" The Sarge looked wistfully out of her porthole and thought "I could murder a cup of Earl Grey and some Thorntons Cookies,*where* has Sam got to?"

Amanda, 12 May 1998, 18:19

***

Sam sighed. It had been a long and arduous Mission, but now it was over - the Task was done. She tucked the tweesers and glue back into a pocket and stood back to regard her handy-work critically.
"Two weeks......" she muttered darkly up into the cover of the tree, where her terribly beweaponed, golden-furred companion was posted on Look-Out Duty. "Two bleedin' weeks! With nothing to sustain us but a Samovar of Earl Grey and the entire Ships supply of Thortons Cookies."
Her friend shrugged sypathetically, though he never took his attention away from scanning the surrounding undergrowth with his Motion Tracker. The Chigs had been here in force once before, and it never did to drop ones Guard against their possible return.
"How many times do I have to tell them to land their damn Chinooks on the golf course - *NOT* over here next to the cherry trees? Do you have any idea how long it takes to stick all that blossom back on with nothing but a pair of tweesers and a tube of superglue?"
Still no answer.
"I'll tell you - Two bleedin' weeks...."
Sam looked around thoughtfully. Now, where *was* the staircase that led back up to the Mid-deck?
"I wonder if anyone else realises just how *big* the Saratoga [hm, shouldn't that be the Magellan though? Die Red.] really is?" she asked rhetorically as they made their way to the foot of the steps.

They had always made a Good Team. And so, when they had run out of Regular Ammunition a few days earlier and had been forced to fall back on their Initiative, they had found that things actually worked out rather well.
As she peered cautiously up into the gloom above (and wondered vaguely when Commodore Ross [??? die Red.] was planning to replace all the 5 watt bulbs with lights you could actually *see* by) Sam cautiously drew out her catapult and a fistful of sharp stones, and took Point.
2nd Lieutenant Sooty Bear (call sign 'Red October' - Silent but Deadly) checked the clip was full on his water pistol as he soundlessly fell in behind.
Together they started the Long Climb......

Sam, the Jester, 13 May 1998, 15:36

***

Mogs looked up from her book and rubbed her eyes. "Gosh", she said, "These flipping memory improvement courses certainly take a long time to read. I wonder just what the time actually is....now....where did I put that darn watch?" (Please note: This dialog has been censored.)

Rummaging around in her things, the Lieutenant found the remote control for the rec. room TV; a half-eaten bagel and light Philadelphia that seemed to be sprouting legs; a lightsaber (Oops, sorry, wrong universe!) and finally, at the bottom of a pile of clean uniforms, her wristwatch. It read 21:00.
That was OK, she wasn't late for anything. Then she noticed the date. "Oh my! Is it really the 15th already?!? Where did the last seven days go?"

Frantically stuffing her belongings into the bunk tidy, Mogs tried valiantly to remember where she was supposed to have been, and what she was supposed to be doing there.
Something about a place called RL kept popping into her thoughts, but she could not for the life of her fathom why it seemed so familiar. As far as she knew, she hadn't been anywhere near it in a very long time.
"I guess I'll have to visit it next time I'm on R&R. Wonder if any of the others know where it is?"

Grabbing her M590, she barrelled out of the bunkroom and nearly ran into Sam and Sooty making their way back from the golf course.
"Sam! Sooty! Where have you been? and more to the point, where am I supposed to be?"
"Darned if I know Mogs. We've been....er...away for the last couple of weeks."
Sooty just stared at her, shook his head and took point.
"Guess you should come along with us, Mogs. We're having a bit of trouble finding the rest of the squad and it might be best if we stuck together till we find out what's going on."
"Sounds OK by me. Where are we headed?"
"The mess. I've a samovar to drop off. Then it's on to the briefing room."

Moving swiftly and almost silently (well, have you tried to carry a loaded catapult and a samovar at the same time?) the two women caught up with Lieutenant Sooty and made their way through the deserted corridors...

Mogs, 15 May 1998, 20:28

***

... until suddenly, they heard the destinctive sound of shouting and cries of pain and terror from a room up ahead!
"Take Cover!" Lieutenent Mogs yelled, and they all swiftly ducked down behind the generously proportioned samovar.
Offering the smallest possible target, Sooty risked a peek around the side of one of the legs.
"Shwaa-bong!!!"
He ducked back hastily as a mechanoid arm ricochetted off the side of the urn and whistled past his ear. He turned and quickly mimed what was happening ahead up to Sam.
"What does he say?" Mogs quizzed as she struggled to cover them all with rapid fire from her M590, as the sounds of tortured squeeling and wierd 'popping' sounds started sounding more urgent by the second.
"He said that he thinks he can just make out Una and the Soupdragon at the far end of the corridor, "Sam translated. "And that whoever threw that arm *must* have been female - what a grass-cutter!"
"True!" Mogs was forced to agree. "But does he think we can get through to the other two?"
Sooty shrugged ( - something glove puppets don't exactly lend themselves to at the best of times), but then finally shook his head in a 'negative'.
"Then we'll have to go 'round! Look - what's that grate down there!"
"It's some kind of ventilation hatch," Sam replied as she struggled with the grill. "Quick, Sooty! Lend me a han...err...paw here!"
But it was no good. After one last burst of gun-fire, Mogs finally had to come over and help.
Together they opened the hatch and peered down into........

Jester, 19 May 1998, 17:49

***

The stumbling, the muffled chatter, the scavenging about. He'd heard it alright.
"What the heck is going on out there ?" he mumbled.
Strapping on his Kbar, he grabbed his standard issue wrist unit and headed for the corridor, making sure he closed his quarters. A faint sound of running footsteps, muffled cries.
"Right, time to find out what all the mysterie is about !" he said to himself, teeth grinding.
Moving into the direction where the noise came from, on the double, he couldn't help but feel that something was wrong. He passed the corridor that lead to the flight deck on his left and stopped. Tilting his head slightly, he listened.
Nothing. The noise he was chasing seemed to have gone. He decided to take a look at the Zoomeys and made half a turn. Firm paces to the deck's primary entrance. He punched in his code, green light, door sliding open. Assessing the environment, looking left, right and up, he set one foot onto the flight deck.
"Something's wrong here," he felt, "better check out the Hammers"
He approached the first Hammerhead, his, and opened the canopy. He ran a quick preliminary diagnostics, but couldn't find anything wrong with the detachable pit. He'd better check out the others as well. Stealthily looking around, he proceeded to the second Head, when he heard rumbling and the falling of bottles of some sort, behind him and to his right, opposit the deck entrance.
"Well I'll be...", he turned, ducked and rolled over to a spot behind the pit of his Hammerhead. Pulling his Kbar, he peeked accross the bay to the corner, when something small passed his field of view on the left side. "Damnit!" Again he turned, stood up and ran to chase whatever it was, however small it was.
Coming around the second canopy, he found a cat staring back at him, black and white, blue eyes, white lil' sock-like paws. Robbel smiled. "Djeeezes!", and then, softly "You gave me quite some adrenaline there, pussy cat - come here!"
With his right hand, he reached into his trousers' side-pocket and got out some stale brownies. "Here, kitty, kitty..." The cat slowly approached, pressing her fragile body to the floor, carefully sniffed and touched the cookie and his hand, didn't take it. Robbel picked up the cat and slid his Kbar back into the holder.
"You're coming with me, pussy" He rubbed gently over the little creature's head. She purred.
"What's that ? Give you a name ? Sure, and that would be..." He thought for a sec, "...Fender of course !"

Robbel put Fender on his shoulder, the kitten put her tiny claws in his khaki Tshirt, but stayed up there.
They left the flight deck. Rob continued in the direction he originally heared the noise and skipchatter from.......

Robin, 19 May 1998, 23:50

***

Soup Dragon and Una seperated. Una took the left fork and Soups the right [hang on a tick, I'll just go check that's right..... yep, we're okay with that ] Soups was muttering as she crunched her way down the corridor "just hope they manage to clean these boots and return them quicker than Zeb did my arm".
The door to the computer room stood open. Carefully, she checked the entrance before going in. Soups sighed with relief as she saw the TechSarge was okay, curled up on her bean bag. Abrubtley she stood still, again she had heard the sound of an AI modem, closer this time.
Then she heard the screams. Soups checked the corridor and saw Robin running with a cat in his shirt. She made a mental note to question this at a later date and joined him.
A little further down the corridor, the grating of a ventilation hatch began to move. Soups and Robin covered the hatch, ready for anything, when........

Soups, 21 May 1998, 18:51

***

The TechSgt barely noticed Soup Dragon poking her nose into the computer room, but managed a vague grin before returning to her programming.... but that's typical of a techie, if a Chig came in it would probably be asked to pass a screwdriver *grin*

TechSgt Mexal, 22 May 1998, 12:34

***

All was quiet as Jester, Sooty and Mogs advanced from starboard towards amidships. Soups and Una were moving up from the stern, careful not to rouse any Chigs which lay scattered across the steel floors. Suddenly both teams heard a strange sound, similar to the click-clicking sound of the Chigs. It sounded like *Take a chance*.

After further investigation, Soups and Una came across a small device in one of the corridors, laying inconspicuously on the gray steel floor.
"What do you think it is?" Soups asked in a whisper, trying to cover her ears from the unspeakable noise the small device was issuing.
"Don't know, let's check..." Una answered and rummaged through the various pockets of her standard issue Marine trousers. Taking out her Swiss knife, she heard Soups chuckle behind her. Turning around, her eyes ablaze, she hissed:
"Don't you dare call me McGuyver, you hear?!"
"Oh-uh, what ever you say, Una dear," Soups said, hardly suppressing a giggle.
Getting down onto the ground on all fours, Una edged herself closer to the small device. It was a smallish black box, similar to one of those old-fashioned walkmans.
Sticking the blade slowly into the box, the sound turned into a discordant noise.
"ARGH; Una, Make it stop," Soups whimpered, covering her ears.
"What do you think I'm doing here, Soups?" Una retorted and tried to use the small OFF-button she had located at the side. Her fingers shook, her palms got sweaty... the noise form the little boom box distracted her to no end. What if the device was a disguised bomb? she thought. Una shook her head, just do it, she thought.

Meanwhile, Sooty, Jester and Mogs had come along the other side of the corridor and when Mogs saw her sis squatting in front of a very strange looking device, she held her breath.
Ignoring Jester who suddenly skipped alongside her, she rushed over, covering her ears because of the strange noise coming from the box.
"Sis, be careful," she said matter of factly and Una looked up all of a sudden. Instead of pushing the off-button, she pushed the volume button.
The noise got more unbearable, booming form the small loudspeaker at the side.
Soups, Una and Mogs duck for cover.

*Take a chance, take a chance .. on me .. take a chance on me ..*

Three very confused Marines looked up from their cover and saw Jester with Sooty singing along to the sound and Jester even had pulled on her electric blue Disco Queen outfit.

When the song ended, Jester looked up and the three Marines looked at her with quirked eyebrows.
"WHAT?" Jester asked. "Never heard of ABBA?"

Una, 02 Jun 1998, 14:26
Sorry to anyone who is an ABBA fan, no hurt or discrimination intended ;)

***

Technical announcement: When confronted with an object you cannot identify, leave it alone, cordon the area and send for somebody qualified to deal with it.

That is all.

TechSgt Mexal, 2 Jul 1998, 21:56

***

"....As always, Susi and Björn slept through the whole thing - the "Do not disturb"-sign hanging on the outside doorknob of their hatch...." :))))))

Susi, 04 Jul 1998, 15:54

***

Somewhere deep in the bowels of the Magellan, Werrf pressed himself against a wall as a troop of Chigs approached. His head was throbbing with the worst hangover he'd ever had...well, in the last twenty four hours, at least. The Chigs passed within a few feet of him, so close that he could hear their clicking chatter.
After about eight Chigs had gone past, Werrf was shocked to see a human in the middle of them, wearing a business suit and carrying a heavy metal briefcase, attatched to his wrist by a pair of handcuffs. He just had time to read the lettering on the briefcase - it said 'S:AAB Season Two Scripts' - before the human was out of sight, and more Chigs were marching past.
When they were gone, Werrf slipped out of his hiding place, and, with his kilt flapping around his legs, ran as fast as he could in the opposite direction.
He had to find them. He had to find them and get help. He had to find the whisky barrels...

Werrf, 6 Jul 1998, 18:20

***

...The music was deafening. Soups could stand it no more, she dropped to her knees, pulled out her K-Bar, and after aiming carefully, threw it at the black box. Silence ruled the Magellan once again.
"Sorry, guys, but I had visions of the Spice Girls coming on next!"
"Okay, we've still got to find the missing crew members, and find out *how* those Chigs got aboard our ship!".

As the group set off down the corridor, Soups remembered the Chigs "You know, I heard the rumour that Werrf had joined up with the Chigs" [sorry, just trying to prove that I *am* catching up on my Space-l digests ;)]. A little further along, they passed a sign flapping on one of the hatch doors it read "Do not disturb". "Well, I guess we'd better leave Susi and Arilin alone, and only call them if we can't sort this mess out".

As the fearless group turned a corner.......

Soups, 06 Jul 1998, 20:24

***

...they ran into Wiena who sat on her knees, her back against the wall, cleaning her K-Bar .
On the floor next to her lay two dead Chigs.
"What kept you all so long? Didn't you hear me scream for help , what the hell is going on here? Just a minute ago Werrf past. He was in a terrible hurry , his face looked like he had just been hunted by a platoon of Chigs and all he did was scream: "Chigs , Chigs , Chigs!". He past right by me without holding his step. Just a view seconds later these two came along ." and she pointed at the two corpses who lay next to her.
"I just could barely handle them and I don't want to be on my own anymore so "Please" lets all stay together and try to find Werrf before he gets himself into some serious problems.
We have to figure out what is going on here and we better do it ASAP".

Wiena, 7 Jul 1998, 14:34

***

Meanwhile on the Flight Deck, the Black Chrysanthemum knelt on the floor by her kit bag unfolding her "Welcome to the Saratoga" leaflet, and trying to fit Tag B into Slot A to construct the 3D model and map with the "You are here" pointer.
If only she had been listening when the rest of the new recruits disembarked instead of compiling 20 excuses not to report to the Gym when so ordered. If only her knitting hadn't fallen out of her bag as she got off the ISSCV. If only people had STOPPED SHOUTING and said something intelligible with real words instead of acronyms.
But hark? What was that strange sound? Reaching up to her cap, she removed one of the many hatpins securing it to her abundant hair, and crept to the doorway...

The Black Chrysanthemumenumenumenum, 11 Jul, 1998 15:05

***

...where she could hear the sound more clearly. A strange sound. Like the rumble of distant thunder. Or maybe the beginnings of an avalanche?

[Comment:
ROFL! Hey if I was running it would be more than the beginnings of an avalanche....more like a full blown natural disaster ;))

The Sarge, 13 Jul 1998, 21:38]

And the sound of running feet. *Many* running feet.
The Black Chrysanthemum quickly whipped the vital contact lense wearers mirror out of her kit bag. Using a piece of sticking plaster to fix the mirror onto the end of a number 9 knitting needle she cautiously positioned the mirror so that she could see what was approaching - without risking being shot at.
What she saw astonished her.
Robbel was hurtling down the corridor with a kitten clutched protectively to his chest. Behind him were at least a dozen armed Chigs dragging a hysterical TV Executive along with them. They didn't seem that interested in Robbel however. They were too busy looking behind them.
Which was not surprising as they were being chased closely by a waterpistol wielding glove puppet, solidly backed up by The Sarge, the Tech. Sarge, Wiena with her freshly spooged K-bar, Jester and her catapult, Mogs, Zeb (lugging her books), Una and the Soup Dragon - all with their respective weaponary aimed directly at the Chigs.
And behind *them*, Werrf - galloping along behind 20 huge, rolling whiskey barrels!...

Jester, 13 Jul 1998, 15:32

***

... after Soups, Jester, Sooty, Mogs and Una had the strange encounter with the boom box, Mexal's warning words still echoing in each and every one's minds that Marines should well leave alone strange black boxes ... our heroines (sorry Sooty ;)) stealthily advanced to amidship ...
The Magellan was silent, only now and then they could hear the thudding of the Nuclear powered engines. Mogs whistled softly, trying to forget the Abba song which had revealed the true identity of Jester.
"You think we should send them flowers as well to get them out in the open?" Soups asked, referring to the huge bouquet she had send our trusted ex-Vice Honcho.
Una grinned.
"Not if you want to carry it ... that thing was huge and heavy - or so I was told," Una replied.
"After all we have to find them ... they are probably all in the 'Tun or sleeping in their racks ..."
"Or are on holiday ..."Jester piped in, the other Marines snorted.
"Marines ain't got no stinkin' R&R!" they said in unison.

Suddenly there was a strange noise coming from the the mess hall.
"Hmm..." Mogs mused. "It sounds like someone has found the food we stashed away just in case."
Unsheathing the K-bars the five Marines walked over to the mess hall, with the XO at point and Soups bringing up the rear. Covering their sixes and each other they dared to look into the mess ... and they saw ... the most awful sight in mankind's history ....

Una, 10 Aug 1998, 12:56

***

Kirsten stumbled out of her quarters in desperate need of a strong, thick coffee. Half asleep she trudged in the general direction of the mess hall....

Kirsten, 10 Aug 1998, 21:21

***

The terrible form of Werrf sat behind a mountain of empty whisky bottles.
As they watched, the young Marine poured the last of a bottle down his throat and tossed the empty bottle onto the huge pile, then turned and put his arm companionably around the shoulders of the confused AI that was sitting next to him.
"So the second Chig says 'No...I said *walker*, not *water*'!" he said and started roaring with laughter. The AI's modem beeped in confusion, then Werrf slapped him companionably on the back...apparently forgetting the very large, very sharp k-bar he was holding. The AI jerked convulsively as the knife buried itself in his back, then folded up and collapsed to the floor.
Werrf just stood there for a few moments looking at the dead android.
"Oh, well," he said, "I guess you had to have been there." He looked up and spotted the others staring at him in shock.
"Oh, hi, chaps," he said, picking his M-590 up off the bar. "Shall we get going?" He headed for the door, but was brought up short by a sudden shout from Una.
"Wait right there, Lieutenant!" the Major barked. He jumped about two feet straight up, and came down standing to attention.
"Yes, ma'am!" he said, saluting.
"Where do you think you're going?" she asked.
"Err...out there?" he replied, pointing at the door.
"Not before you clear up this mess, you're not!"
"Oops...sorry, ma'am." He quickly shovelled the empty whisky bottles into the waste disposal unit, and followed them up with the dead AI, retrieving his k-bar as the humanoid creature slid down the chute.
"That's better," Una said when he'd finished. "Now, fall in, Lieutenant."
He saluted.
"Yes, ma'am." He took up a position at the back of the group, M-590 in one hand, k-bar in the other.
"Okay," Una barked, "Let's move out!"

Werrf, 12 Aug 1998, 16:40

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Here you can access the summary written by Soups on July 3rd, 1998.
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Okay, so I'm nosy, but wouldn't *you* like to know as well ;)