Quotes about Psychopathy



Most of the excerpts on this webpage were taken from the following books about psychopathy:

Ditch That Jerk: Dealing With Men Who Control and Hurt Women Pamela Jayne, MA, makes a claim in her book that 30% of men are sociopathic.

The Emptied Soul Guggenbuhl-Craig believes that many psychopaths who walk among us are often those who hold upstanding positions in society, what he calls compensated psychopaths. Find out more in this most fascinating book.

Violent Attachments Meloy's brilliant foray into the twisted relationships between psychopaths and the women who love them. This is a more clinical type of book, but still makes for very interesting reading.

Antisocial Behavior Dr. Wolman believes that our society is already showing evidence of an "epidemic of sociopaths" and says he wrote his book as a "wake up call." Read his book to find out why.

Without Conscience The classic book by Dr. Hare. A must read.

Bad Boys, Bad Men Dr. Black's book about sociopathy in lower class populations of males.




". . .a person lacking eros (love) can be charming. . .the presence of eros makes life difficult for people. . .Eros means caring, and if someone cares for whatever or whoever it may be, worries, nervousness, even neurotic tensions can be the result. Loving persons are seldom cool and relaxed, but people suffering from a deficient eros are unconcerned and so do not worry; often they are very relaxed and easy-going. It is agreeable to be with people who are deficient in eros; they usually know how to behave pleasantly and can be socially delightful--except when eros is needed." (from The Emptied Soul).

Psychopathy is a personality or character disorder. They are not crazy people, although some, like Charles Manson, can also suffer from paranoia and schizophrenic-like symptoms. For this reason, sometimes people think psychopaths are crazy.

Hare writes that "the majority of psychopaths manage to ply their trade without murdering people. By focusing too much on the most brutal and newsworthy examples of their behavior, we run the risk of remaining blind to the larger picture: psychopaths who don't kill but who have a personal impact on our daily lives." (Hare, 6).

Nearly everyone has a "friend, colleague, relative, or acquaintance whose life is touched by ASP (psychopathy). The disorder is so common that not to know an antisocial is itself remarkable. The closer one is to the disorder, the more one knows about its destructive potential." (Black, XV).

Also, it's important to note that "in a psychiatric context, the term antisocial has nothing to do with a person's ability to socialize and is not used to describe those who are shy, inhibited, reclusive, or withdrawn. Rather, it implies a rebellion against society, a denial of the obligations that tie individuals to one another. People with ASP (psychopathy)can be expertly social, adept at manipulating others when it serves their devious purposes, but their relationships tend to be superficial, short-lived, and bereft of trust." (Black, XIIII).

Guggenbuhl-Craig states that they are very talented at appearing much more humble than the average person, but are hardly so.

In one of Dr. Donald Black's studies, many of the men were "overwhelmingly white, blue collar, lower middle class, and married, and most had not graduated from high school." (Black, 14). (Let me add, despite Dr. Blacks' studies, psychopaths can still exist in any social class. Do not be misled).

What is very disturbing about psychopaths, besides their sense of special entitlement, is the complete lack of empathy for normal people, for "antisocials (psychopaths) seem to lack a conscience, feeling little or no empathy for the people whose lives they touch...the antisocial effortlessly resists all regulation, unable to see beyond his self-interest or to adopt standards of right versus wrong." (Black, XIII).

Not all psychopath are uneducated low-class misfits. Some of them are quite handsome and have good careers, and use this all the more to their benefit. Take a look at Ted Bundy; my friend's mother once went on a double-date with him and claimed he was the nicest person. His mother said he was the "best son any mother could have." Bundy was also apparently quite good-looking, which made him even more dangerous.

There is much to the psychopathic personality which is baffling and disturbing. According to Tim Field and a few other experts, 1 in about 25-30 people are psychopathic (sometimes referred to as sociopaths or anti-social -- the correct title being psychopath.)

"Antisocials/psychopaths are not just characters in our fictional or true-life entertainments. They are family members, friends, co-workers, neighbors, or strangers we may encounter every day." (Black, 10).

Pamela Jayne, M.A., writes that "30% of men are sociopathic." I would assume this is not something to take lightly. According to these statistics, that would mean every three out of ten men and maybe every one out of ten females. The truth is, we do not really know exactly how many individuals are psychopathic; however, there seems to be a rise in the prevalence of psychopathy and that is why some claim that numbers are higher.

Dr. Black claims that psychopathy leads right behind depression, along with schizophrenia and borderline personality disorder, which is an astounding fact.

Tim Field, a noted author and researcher of psychopathy, believes that the psychopath picks out people who can see through him: "A bully's (sociopath) apparent self-esteem and self-confidence is actually arrogance, an unsustainable belief of invulnerability honed from his willingness to act outside the bounds of society to ensure their survival. Targets (or victims) are people who can see through the arrogance to perceive the empty shell behind it - and bullies can sense who can see through them, furthering the target's elimination." (Bully OnLine).

They have "an uncanny ability to spot and use 'nurturant' women -- that is, those who have a powerful need to help or mother others." (Hare, 149). As Hare recounts, a particular "nurturance-seeking missile" who had a local reputation for attracting a steady stream of female visitors seemed to have this talent. He was "not particularly good-looking or very interesting to talk to. But he had a certain cherubic quality that some women, staff included, seemed to find attractive. One woman commented that she 'always had an urge to cuddle him.' Another said that 'he needs mothering.'" (Hare, 149).

Guggenbuhl-Craig, writes in his book The Emptied Soul, that "Relationships (for psychopaths) are things of the moment. . .their motto seem(s) to be 'Out of sight, out of mind.' (41)

Psychopaths have a grandiose self-structure which demands "a scornful and detached devaluation of others" (Gacon et al 1992), in order to ward off envy toward the good perceived in people.

The psychopathic personality can also be very convincing. They may "ramble and tell stories that seem unlikely in light of what is known about them. Typically, they attempt to appear familiar with sociology, psychiatry, medicine, psychology, philosophy, poetry, literature, art, or law. A signpost to this trait is often a smooth lack of concern at being found out." (Hare, 35).

In Dr. Black's studies, many of the men he talked to had "no qualms about admitting their past and current misdeeds, even inflating them..." for their benefit. (Black, 14). Psychopaths show a "disturbing lack of empathy and fail to learn from their experiences, always blaming someone else for their problems and misdeeds." (Black, 16). They also feel no need to explain why "their every betrayal is justified. One of their main features is the ease with which they can betray others.

Guggenbuhl-Craig expresses, "Since love and morality do not get in their way, they often succeed in bewitching those around them." (122)

Also, the psychopath can be very good at feigning love. Guggenbuhl-Craig recalls a few incidents about a psychopath who deluged his sweetheart with presents and affection. None of it was real even though the man acted like he cared for her. One of these psychopathic "romancers" later killed his partner and felt no remorse at all. The woman had merely been taken in by empty gestures. I suspect many women out there who are reading this will identify with this.

Lying is like breathing to the psychopath. When caught in a lie and challenged, they make up new lies, and don't care if they're found out. As Hare states, "Lying, deceiving, and manipulation are natural talents for psychopaths...When caught in a lie or challenged with the truth, they are seldom perplexed or embarrassed -- they simply change their stories or attempt to rework the facts so that they appear to be consistent with the lie. The results are a series of contradictory statements and a thoroughly confused listener." (Hare, 46).

Despite all their outward bravado, many psychopaths who report feeling depressed often describe themselves as black holes, empty, dark, void, etc, for "disorders like depression, alcohol or drug dependence, pathological gambling, and psychosexual disturbances can accompany ASP (psychopathy) and even may have been the driving force that led the patient to seek help." (Black, 71).

Psychopaths may also sense that they are different and damaged when compared with others, which feeds further resentments.

While charming, they seem confident because of the way they brag and bolster themselves. Dr. Black states that one of the most obvious signs of psychopathy is the way the individual will brag about his experiences, no matter "how unsavory...his apparent comfort with his deviant behavior, the ease with which he discuss(es) breaking every rule, (is) consistent with ASP (psychopathy)." (Black, 68).

In sum, the experience of dealing with a psychopath can be very troubling for most people, not to mention, when he is through with you, you will be vilified falsely. I recently asked Field about what one can do when faced with this problem (Field refers to them as sociopaths) and the apparent absence of justice when it comes to their behaviour -- Field's response was: "The main lesson I have learnt is that when dealing with a sociopath, the normal rules of etiquette do not apply. You are dealing with someone who has no empathy, no conscience, no remorse, and no guilt...It is a completely different mindset. Words like 'predator' and 'evil' are often used."

Dr. William Higgins claims that you "can't negotiate or bargain with psychopaths."

On the other hand, "psychopaths sometimes verbalize remorse but then contradict themselves in words or actions." (Hare, 41). Psychopaths may apologize or show remorse only to get away with something, but in the end you will be stabbed in the back and realize how very shallow their words were. Everyone who knows a psychopath will be stabbed in the back, sooner or later.

The psychopath also appears not to be able to remember what they had said or committed to for very long. They seem to always be living in the present. That is why they are usually guilty of being big promise-makers who cannot live up to their word. Once again, it will be the victim who must deal with the aftermath of all the psychopath's twists and turns, and when he gets you angry enough, you will be discredited as "defective" by him, and the psychopath will often make himself out to be the real victim. As John Wayne Gacy once said, "I was the victim, I was cheated out of my childhood."