You know that you've
joined a redneck HMO if:


* The annual breast exam is conducted at Hooter's

* Directions to the Dr's office include "Take a left when you enter the trailer park"

* The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles

* The only proctologist lists his address as Rotorooter

* The Lone Star Bar and Grill is an approved pharmacy

* Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month

* Preventive Care Coverage includes "an apple a day"

* Your Prozac comes in colors and has little "m"s on each pill

* The only 100% covered expense is embalming

And the best one:

*Your Viagra prescription includes a popsicle stick and some duct tape
Joke Index